Review Replies to TT Chapter 15
I really hope you guys have the Ctrl+F option available (or the Mac equivalent). I'm posting this a little early (i.e. before Chapter 16) just to get it out of the way. Please don't be shy about using the askbox :)
Ryu Kitsune Bard84: I personally don't mind the changes. Yeah this was a good chapter. Let's see Chunin exam matchups...I'd say I'd love to see Gaara vs Kazuki. It would be interesting seeing Sasuke having to worry about his brother like that. Also Sakura vs Kin (the Sound genin) since she's taking being a ninja slightly better then she was at the beginning of manga. Oh sweet, love the suggestions! I had been thinking about an encounter btw Kazuki v. Gaara for a while, but for some reason I never considered an actual matchup. No promises, but I definitely like your suggestions :D (and yay! I’m glad you don’t mind the changes XD)
Grey-Rain-Cloud: I'm really excited to see more of Asuma and his reactions to Kazuki, which surprised me because Asuma isn't one of my favourite characters (not that I dislike him). But I think that it'll be really interesting with the way you're portraying people! Really great writing in this chapter! :) Thanks! Yeah, Asuma isn’t one of my favorite characters either cuz we don’t really see much of him. He was a much larger part of this chapter in several of my earlier drafts, but he was just too boring – so I gave up ^^;
Skewedchoice: Love for the author! Love for the reader XD
Sage of Wind Dragons: you know its a BAD sighn when the show can be summed up as DAMM IT Danzo three quarters fo the time. but yeesh you id him well so far amongst other stuff and Shikaku is fun all of your charecters are awesome! good job on making MIZUKI sympathetic. Ahahahahaha lol, I was brushing my teeth when I saw your review and almost choked on the toothpaste. Haha. Yea, Danzo’s such a pain XD Yaaaaay, so glad that came across well. I find the most interesting stories are the ones where you can empathize or at least understand everyone. (Not to say that the ones where villains are just plain villains aren’t fun). Thanks for reviewing!
10th Squad 3rd Seat: Oh my godDx Danzo is still an ass. haha, never knew it’d be so satisfying/relieving to write a character that everyone seems to hate.
Amethystfirechik: Oh no! I don't want anything to happen to Shikaku. I hope that Danzo gets stopped before anything bad happens. I love Kakashi's way of thinking, it's funny. Does Kazuki showing his team that he knows the Nara's techniques and having the sharingan have anything to do with him thinking over Nao's words? And no I haven't read anything from Tamora Pierce. But if you recommend it I'll read it. Err. It’ll get worse before it gets better? Plus all the fun stuff happens when characters are like super stressed right? …:sidles away: Kakashi’s such a troll. I’m glad you enjoyed his viewpoint, I was worried he didn’t seem … well ‘Kakashi’ enough. AAanyway, yea, Kazuki was a little affected by Nao’s words, but it also has to do with Team Ten/Nine– I get the feeling that he’d recognize the potential danger of keeping his abilities secret toward their individual health and the health of the team as a whole. I mean, I think his team is an emotional anchor for him. Ahhah, err I read Tamora Pierce’s books when I was really young (like in late elementary school), so I don’t know if that early childhood bias might have colored my opinions of her work.
Why881992883840002882818839: Bwhahahahah! You've actually made me like Ino, not that I ever disliked her I just didn't care about her one way or the other. That comment has firmly cemented this version of Ino in my 'like' column. Great chapter, I especially like it because it focuses on Kazuki. I've always been a character centered reader. Plot is important but it's the characters I'm really interested in, and I love Kazuki. I'm really looking forward to seeing how Kazuki meshes with his team the second go around. Looking forwards to more, as always. Ahahaha, I’m glad you like her. The more I think about her, the more relievingly straightforward she seems. XD. Yea ditto, I’m a character-driven story person. I mainly jump around in POVs because that’s how I figure out most of the storyline :D So glad you still love Kazuki! (and also, thankssomuch for signing as Why88, I keep on meaning to ask if you had a nickname you like to go by)
Animagirl: I like Sasuke and Kazuki's brotherly relationship. It would be awesome if Kazuki and Sasuke trained together. Update soon:) heh. I tried to fit some training scenes in, but it all just came out too awkward. … and I don’t think there will be any until after the Wave arc. Glad you like the siblings tho :)
Littlemelonatplay: Well what do you know? Kazuki's Uchiha is shining through. He hardly had any contact with Itachi, yet he's trying so hard to get him back. That subtlety you mentioned is apparent here. Definitely an Uchiha characteristic. I know the scene with Shikaku and Kazuki was serious and yes, I could see the stress, determination, and even some desperation from Kazuki. However, at the end, I couldn't help but have an "Aww how sweet!" moment at the adorableness of Kazuki trying so hard for Itachi. Also, I think your writing captures the essence of Itachi that is portrayed in the anime (at least how I picture his essence to be). I love reading scenes with him since you write Itachi so well. Naruto was awesome in this chapter! My favorite scene in this chapter was when he explained what was wrong with his Bunshins and how he fixed them with Kazuki's "explanation." In addition, I forgot to mention it, but I'm relishing the political intrigue going on throughout the story. I just re-watched the first few episodes of Naruto and realized what a troll Kakashi is in the anime in that arc (it's been a long time since I saw it) and is similar to your Kakashi. Oddly enough, reading about Noa with the added perspectives made me feel much more sympathetic towards her. Not everyone is cut out for that type of job. It was precarious from the get go. At least she didn't take advantage of them. Chapter 13: omg, your comment made me so relieved about Itachi. I mean with Kazuki, I feel like you can get away with a lot of stuff. Shikaku’s harder because of his intelligence, but I mean Itachi’s whole self-sacrificing thing – especially the way that he’s a martyr is just mind boggling. (On a random note, I feel like Naruto might be just below Kazuki. I mean at face value, he’s probably one of the most fun characters to write, but rereading the manga made me really appreciate his innocence and straightforwardness, which I think a lot of fics with ‘strong! Or Smart!’ Naruto just sometimes tend to dim down… He’s just that adorable little puppy that walks into walls. I’m hoping to still capture that, but we’ll see XD) Wow, sorry for the rambling. I’m glad you caught the whole ‘Uchiha’ blood thing there :D Though truth be told, I think Shikamaru naturally had that pigheaded stubbornness to what he perceived as his duty. I mean he risked his own life during the finals to help Sasuke – a guy who he didn’t even like before. Chapter14: oh gosh, I think you’re the only one who’s enjoyed the political intrigue XD Chapter15: Hahaha, yea, and isn’t Naruto like the cutest? His ‘stupidity’ used to frustrate me to no end, but maybe it’s cuz I’m older or maybe because we’ve seen what he can become, it’s just really adorable to me now ^^; Whoo, and wow yea I didn’t expect that many people to feel sorry for Noa haha – thanks for reviewing!
Ser Serendipity: AAAHHH The block text at the end. It burns. Neat chapter. Good to see all the genin cooperating. Also: Danzo's a dick. But Orochimaru is an EFFECTIVE dick. I actually feel bad for Mizuki. Err, yea well idk, gave people the chance to vote/complain about it like two chapters ago (?I don’t even remember), but only one person hated it, while several people liked it. It took a while to make that decision – especially since most of the reviewers who’ve been with me since like the first few chapters were anonymous. :shrugs: I’m trying out the tumblr reply thing so we’ll see how this goes. Ctrl +end is a good shortcut if that helps Haha that’s one way to put it. I get the feeling that Orochimaru just wanted to troll everyone at some point, like he’s just idek. heh. Yea, I felt like giving Mizuki’s character a little more depth. Glad you enjoyed.
Cute Kirby: I feel like I never quite understand what's going on whenever Danzo and Orochimaru are involved. So Mizuki was receiving orders from both of them? And then Danzo had Tsubaki killed and tried to frame Orochimaru while also making it look like a suicide? For a moment I was even confused about why in the world Shikaku is manufacturing the doohickies, but then I realized that, duh, he's baiting Danzo. The interactions between the two teams make me feel all warm and fuzzy! :) And just kinda summarizing the team tests really worked well. Good call. Noa's goodbye was kinda bittersweet, but she gave Kazuki some good advice. It reminds me a bit of the advice Itachi gave Naruto: you can't do everything on your own, you've got to depend on your friends. He seems to have taken it to heart (at least in part), if revealing his clan(s) jutsu to his team is any indication. ^^; Did this chapter clarify matters? Tori originally was working for Orochimaru, and had gotten Mizuki into the Academy reporting any special behavior to Tori, so that Tori could tell Orochimaru about kids the sannin might be interested in. Danzo figures out Tori’s an agent and ‘encourages’ Tori to do what he asks, so Mizuki starts teaching the kids only really basic stuff – which he wasn’t happy about – thinking that Tori’s orders come from Orochimaru, when they really come from Danzo. It comes to a head when Danzo wants to ‘catch’ Mizuki, and reveal the failings in the Academy by ordering Mizuki to steal the Forbidden Scroll – or at least make an attempt at stealing the scroll. When Mizuki wasn’t moving fast enough, he kills Tsubaki, and attempts to frame Orochimaru for it, thinking that Mizuki would act more reckless out of anger or whatever. Orochimaru, however, foils this plan because the dude’s irritated that Danzo’s been messing with Tori (who Danzo had already killed)
On Shikaku’s end, he initially starts to investigate Danzo so that he could tell the Hokage what kind of skills that a candidate would need to be Danzo’s successor. Along the way he meets Kazuki, who gives him the report on the ‘future’. Shikaku’s been pulling documents from the beginning, but since Danzo’s done his best to hide his tracks, the rate at which he’s determining and finding the documents that he needs is slow. However, because he needs to figure out how much of Kazuki’s ‘future’ matches with current events, he needs to pull a lot more and well… Danzo has a guilty conscience…
So uh, what did you mean by manufacturing ‘doohickies’?
Yaaay, glad you liked the interactions between the two teams – and that the test description worked out. Oh hey, I didn’t even think of the comparison between Noa and Itachi.
#44 Guest: Please shikaku cant die early! Dont kill him (yet) haha, interesting use of ‘yet’. Err, but yea, don’t worry ;)
Lock on Lockon: Loved the chapter as always!...can't wait for the next one. Especially loved team seven's first meeting :) haha, writing the first meeting was fun. It was probably one of the scenes that was fastest to write. Glad you liked it!
Silvanon of the Orchard: That was an interesting plot twist with Danzo, Orochimaru & Mizuki. I think that's good that Kazuki let his team know about his abilities. Fics where a character lets his/her team get hurt because they don't want to reveal what they can do are annoying. Awe, was Itachi checking up on his brothers again? :) I liked Team 9's test, and how you had them solve it. Thanks for the update! Sadly I didn't watch any of the filler, so no idea on that. I don't recall there ever being a cannon explanation for the rabbit. Exam matches ... I'm particularly interested in Kazuki's, Sasuke's, and Naruto's. XD Glad you were able to follow that plot. I was starting to worry that it only made sense to me and my beta. Yea, I know what you mean – I was tempted to have Kazuki keep his secrets a little longer, but 1) I couldn’t really justify it to myself and 2) I couldn’t put up with the suspense myself haha. Now I’m trying to figure out who should also know without overcomplicating the plot. With Itachi checking on his brothers, I feel like he had to have some way of doing it, cuz otherwise it seemed like no one other than the councilers and the hokage knew about his secret, and they didn’t really seem to be in contact with him. I know some people pointed out that Jiraiya might have been in contact with him, but that doesn’t seem to be making much sense to me either. Yay, glad you liked Team 9’s update and thanks for answering my questions!
SilverVolpe: Is it bad that I actually wanted Orochimaru to kill Mizuki? Can't wait to find out where that particular plot goes. Also, I've said this several times before but it bears repeating; I love your characterisation of, well, just about everyone here. I love the mind plays between Shikaku and Kazuki in the last couple of chapters (I've been on holidays so am now playing catch up). Also enjoyed the multiple points of views we got in this chapter and it was interesting to see the changes in Team 7's behaviour. I will definitely go read about that in TT outtakes when I get around to playing catch up there. I think there was one episode where Konohamaru and gang were doing an article for the Academy newspaper at around the Chuunin Exams and went about interviewing people, Shikamaru might have been one of them but I'm not really sure. hahaha, I hadn’t heard that one before. (and no, I don’t think so XD) :cuddles with review: yay! I’m glad the characterizations are still working out. I’ve been kinda getting more nervous in some parts because we’re really moving into the meat of the canon, and I’m like changing a crap ton of junk so. XD. Ah brilliant, thanks for that tip! I think I found it – thanks so much :D
Not the usual baka: Sorry about the late response, went through an obsessive, compulsive reading of a series. There were actual physical books involved! But now I have returned to Naruto's world. Agree with Shikaku, paperwork should be feared. What is this stash Shikaku is thinking about? Ow, you made crow-Itachi fall off a tree, meanie. Did you at least feed him some sugar to make up for the hurt? Kazuki mislead Shikaku? The wooden marker about Itachi's mission? The Naruto and Sasuke feedback loop will be most useful. Team 7 comes alive with a flying tackle. Team 10 turned into team 9?! It might take getting used to. Asuma's bounty bigger than Kakashi's?! No way. Naruto and his clones are so cute. You made a sleeping pile of teams 7 and 9, the awesome is growing. Naruto makes a good intro for Sasuke, though bargaining the services of his clones for only one bowl of ramen, selling himself a little cheap there Naruto. I'm assuming Kabuto talked about "Tori" being removed not "Tobi". Oh no, Shikaku is been dumped into danger by Danzo. Filler episodes before the Chuunin exams, don't quite remember when it happened for Team 7 but there was something about catching a talking ostrich. Can't think of any Konohamaru and Shikamaru interaction, but I suppose you could add Kazuki to the scene when Team 7 first meets the Sand siblings. Haku's rabbit didn't get a flashback in canon. Yay! Glad to see I didn’t lose you XD. (which series? Was it any good :D? I haven’t read physical fictional books in ages). Haha – I had him change into a kunai so he wouldn’t break any bones… but err :hangs head: nope no, sugar. Oh heh, yea a lot of people were confused about where Kazuki mislead Shikaku which makes me think that was only in my head. Basically the idea was I was trying to figure out how Shikamaru would explain that he used to be a Nara without giving away enough clues for Shikaku to think that they used to be related. I, at first, figured that Shikamaru would state he was a Nara to explain why he knew so much about the Nara, and not that much about the Uchiha, but then I realized that if Kazuki just said nothing, Shikaku would automatically assume that Kazuki had always been an Uchiha. The other stuff could kinda be explained away by the fact that he’s an orphan and had supposedly fought in a war. Heh. Oh, that stash, that was a reference to that manga scene where Shikaku’s dying and hurriedly makes a request to Shikamaru that he get rid of the stash in the bookshelf. Tbh, I have no idea what that stash is, I’m assuming it’s porn, judging by how fearful he looked at the thought of Yoshino finding out. As for the bounties, I purposefully mentioned that Asuma's was larger the :last: time he checked. It could be out of date ;). Oh woooow, thank you for catching - yes it was supposed to be Tori, not Tobi. Thanks for answering my questions, and yes, I've been running through several scenarios of what Kazuki might be doing when team 7 runs into the sand siblings.
Hektols: Excellent chapter, finally the Uchiha brothers are free. Sticking to old teams? I would have prefered other formations but keeping the original ones makes sense, all teams turned out really good minus Team 7 (and it was due to Orochimaru's interference). The best part was Shikamaru's reaction when he saw Asuma again, most time travel fics don't make it right when the time traveller sees a lost precious person alive again. Thank you for not showing the Bell Test, it was seen thousands of times, I prefer this version with they explaining their plan, it is good to see a fic where Sakura makes use of her brain, she was supposed to be the smartest of her age group after Shikamaru. Danzo being the bastard he is, Shikamaru will have to find a way to deal with him, this time they won't have Sasuke as missing nin killing him. Yea, I tried moving them around, but I kept on spotting issues with the arrangements that I had until I put them back into their original teams. Oh, I’m glad you liked the reaction to Asuma. I wasn’t really certain about Kazuki since Shikamaru’s reactions to things generally appear to be pretty muted. Ehehehehe everyone’s calling Danzo’s names. Anyway, thanks for the review! Love the discussion of the Narutoverse with you
Viridian: Urgh. Danzo and Orochimaru. I'm really feeling for Mizuki here! (I can hardly believe it.). Anyway, I'm glad the teams and senseis didn't change (with Shikaku's help...?). I was also liked Noa's farewell to Kazuki- she made a really good point about considering the ramifications of maintaining ignorance. Most time-travel/whatever-this-one-is fics only consider the dangers of sharing knowledge, even with all the changes going on. In any case, it was good that Kazuki took her advice (or perhaps he was already planning to do so). Thanks for the update! I'm looking forward to reading more soon. hahaha, this sounds bad but I’m glad you feel sorry for Mizuki, it means that scene came out right XD Yaaay, some people weren’t happy with the lack of change so I’m glad you liked it. Thanks so much for reviewing and I’m glad you like the decisions I’ve made so far :D
Bloodshound: welp, things seem to have gone far more smoothly for the kids this time out... i wonder why kakeshi still has some memories? ah Mizuki, how it doth suck to be thee. still, no one can serve two masters, let alone three with his supposed allegiance to the hokage as well. neither the snack roach or danzo the mummy are the sort to share well, or play nice. I hope for something dire happening to both those prick bastards some time in the future. Err huh? Wait what do you mean by Kakashi still has some memories? Ahahaha, loved the comment about Mizuki, it was so poetic. Thanks for reviewing!
Aeonir: Please don't include the retarded filler with the pre-chuunin-exam test that they have the rookies go through in the anime. tbh, I’d completely forgotten about those. Thanks for the reminder, and yea, I’ll prolly avoid those, no promises yet tho since I haven’t ironed out the outline for that section very well yet.
Strife666: who took over shikamaru's existence as the nara heir? No one … which is an issue. ;)
ITACHIROCKS: Great work, senpai! Keep it up! (I have, like, no time to review. GAWD SOOOO MANY TESTS FOR NO REASON. French, Geometry, Chemistry, Psychology, AND Government. I only have two periods without tests tomorrow.) *dies* Maia :winces: Thanks for still reviewing. Stinks that you have so many tests on the same day. Once, my ap bio class blockaded the doors on the day of a test. Our teacher opened the door and left, and we were like oh shoot, we’re in trouble. But then she came back with a camera- hah. We still got the test. Err belated good luck?!
#1 Guest: Excellent work! Keep it up! Also, from the wiki that has Konohamaru's line to Shika referenced with "Naruto: Shippūden episode 234" Also a "Battle of the Dojutsu" would be cool (Hinata or Neji vs. Sasuke or Shikamaru/Kazuki), unless you wanna keep the Neji v. Hinata fight. And I thiiiiink they said that Haku bred the rabbits, but don't quote me on that. Also, I try to stick to manga based episodes, sooooooooo...I can't really help with the filler episodes. All I really watched was the Utakata arc. (Shameless Utakata fan) ALSO THANK YOU FOR THE WEBSITE YOU WONDERFUL HUMAN BEING YOU. Oh my gosh, thanks so much for the detailed answers. Seriously, you just rock so much!! Yea no worries on the filler, seems like people generally don’t seem to care about that at this point. Ooh, I’ve been told I need to watch the Utakata arc. Haha, and np on the website, I’m just sorry it took me so long to get back to you.
AnonymousFern: Well, I'm slowly getting the hang of it. Awesome job, though. Keep it up! Also...seeing as you mentioned Haku... couldyoukeephimaliveyoudontevenhavetokeepZabuzaalivebutthatpoorchildneedsahug. (That was easier to typee than other stuff.) Haha, I’ll see what I can do. Current plot outlined is he survives.
Uzushiogakure9: Yeap, you follow me. And I follow you. Wut. Oooooh, okay! I see where you're coming from with the Kage Bunshin thing. And can you imagine Shikazuki having to fight Gaara? Gah. That would either be amazing or UTTERLY HORRIFYING. Anyway, keep up the amazing work! (The ad next to the review box is in Japanese and I see ifgawuifgsawuifgsu ['no' symbol] CELLPHONE. What.) heheh, I’m like leaning more towards that match-up everyday. Lol, that’s new.
xXmini-chibiXx: I was so happy when I saw you updated . I'm reading this in class, I'm supposed to be writing something about the Industrial Revolution. It's due at the end of the lesson D: But this story's so good... Will Kakashi find out about Kazuki's/Shika's mangekyou sharingan? Will anyone? Ooh, hope the essay wasn’t too hard. I suck at timed writing. Anyway, for the mangekyou, currently, the earliest I can see Kazuki using it is during the chuunin exams. Mainly, that’s because Itachi seemed to prefer to use it ‘sparingly’ when we first saw him and that was when he was already in his late teens. Also, I feel like Kazuki’s somewhat reliant on his eyes and having him start to lose his sight amid everything else that I’m going to be throwing at him would be too much I think for him (and me XD) to deal with. As to who finds out about it…, errr…, that part of the outline (specifically the chuunin exam part) is the one that keeps on changing at the moment XD.
Tiffycoop: I cannot believe another chapter has come out and I still hadn't written my review for this chapter. So Kabuto and Orochimaru are discussing Danzo leaving to go somewhere and one of their assets has been compromised. They are assuming it was by Danzo but it could have been from Shikaku. The question becomes who will realize Shikaku is looking at Danzo first? Danzo or Orochimaru? I thought Naruto’s explanation of why he “changed” the seal for the Bushin was hilarious. Iruka however did not. Team placement. Is very involved. When broken down this way, makes a lot of sense: class standings, gender, parent-guardian feedback, and bloodlines, temperament and Jounin Instructor. The really surprising thing was knowing everyone expected Team 7 to be a failure. I would of thought there would be more pressure on this team to succeed not fail. If Kakashi had failed them, I guess the members of Team 7 would have to look into becoming apprenticeships? I still find it weird to know things that Shikamaru didn't. You take the knowledge you learned from the TV show or manga for granted but your story forces you to really think about what Shikamaru would know. I keep getting surprised with the amount of information that Shikamaru didn’t know. I believe he probably knew more than any of the other members of Team 8, 9 and 10 but still not enough. Like now, Kazuki believes Kakashi just had bad luck being assigned the Jounin instructor for a Team 7. A team Shikaku just admitted was expected to fail. He thinks Kakashi past them because of the Sandaime “request” but he doesn't know the truth. He will eventually learn Kakashi wanted to teach Naruto because he is Minato’s son. I wonder how long it will take him to realize the truth. As an aside to this, I wonder will Kazuki learn all of the Team 7 information. What I mean by this, Team 7 was part of a lot of important missions and had access to a lot of high level information, which was not true for Teams 8, 9, and 10. I wonder if Kazuki will be in the loop of that information or access this time around. I haven’t figured out how this would work but that doesn't mean it can’t happen. The whole group is helping him to get the team placement to be the same as it was for Shikamaru which makes it more difficult to see him being in the loop. I can see only 2 ways for him to be included in the loop: 1. Team placement changes and he gets put on a team with Naruto and Sasuke (I don’t see this happening but it is possible) and 2. Instead of Team 7 being the only elevated team all 3 teams (and eventually 4 with Team Gai) would be in the loop of information and all sent on important missions. I think 2 is a better option but it will depend if the teams can demonstrate they deserve the elevation. Jiraiya will be looking Tsunade. I wonder if this will bring her back to Konoha earlier than canon. I curious how that will play out if she actually comes back even if it’s for just a short visit. What affect if any will it have on the Genins? Thanks for the great story! I’m off to read the next chapter. I understand your reasoning for not placing them as Team 10 but I just have one question, what happened to Team Gai? Are they now Team 10? Ok. I don’t know if I’m understanding this correctly. Mizuki was an spy for Orochimaru. Danzo found out somehow that Mizuki was Orochimaru’s spy so he had one of his agents figure out there means of communications. Once Danzo learns their method of communication, he uses it to give Mizuki orders so Mizuki will think they were from Orochimaru. Danzo is a tyrant. He did all of that to Mizuki just so he could change the academy curriculum. He’s a council member so I think he could have brought up that topic in one of the meetings however that’s not his style. He likes doing all these things behind the scenes. What will the tyrant do now that he knows Shikaku is looking at his activities? I wonder what type of game he will try to play with Shikaku? Looking forward to see what kind of mishaps these teams will get into. :Jumps with joy: Hey! Glad to see you back :D Nothing’s changed to Team Gai – I’m guessing that question was asked because Team Gai’s number might have been 9? Tbh, I tried to look up Team Gai’s number, but I haven’t been able to find anything about it. Then my beta was adamant that they weren’t team 9 so… :shrugs: . Yupyup, you’re understanding it correctly! I don’t think he would have successfully passed the changes to the Academy curriculum that he would have wanted to pass if there was no :pressure: for it – so he felt like he had to create the proper circumstances that would allow his suggestions to be considered. I mean it was otherwise peace time, so making things more militant probably would have been met with some resistance. Ehehe, I think Iruka didn’t know what to think. I mean if he laughs, he’d be encouraging the kid and …hehe. Yea, I wonder what would have happened if Team 7 had failed. I mean, I think some people (like the hokage and Itachi) had every expectation of them passing, but yea, I wonder if maybe they would have eventually gotten shuffled onto another sensei that would pass them. I mean Naruto made that statement in the exams where he was like ‘I’ll be the genin that becomes a hokage’, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he’d still find a way to make that work. Haha. I’m glad the team placement stuff made sense tho :) and yaaay, I’m glad you noticed that. I’m still afraid that I’m going to make the mistake of having characters know stuff that they shouldn’t, but fingers crossed ;) Hmm, what do you mean by access to high level information? Just curious.
Hehehehe Tsunade. Uh, yea, had a huge conversation with my beta about that when Bonnie first volunteered for the job. I’ll leave it at that. XD Thanks so much for the lovely review
MythologyGirl: Holy cliffhanger, Batman! I hope nothing bad happens to Shikaku. I was totally blindsided by Tsubaki's death... Blew my mind right there. I think my favorite part of this chapter had to be the cuddle pile though - so adorable. Seriously, I think I melted when it was described that Chouji was being used as a pillow and that Sasuke was essentially cuddling with his brother. Not to mention Team 7's painfully cute reactions to be awoken due to there teacher showing up (Kakashi love!). I wish we got to see them all running around the village looking for the coins as that would probably have been hilarious. I get the feeling Asuma was asked to adjust his test a little to actually physically see the coins, maybe due to Shikaku? I feel like if Shikaku was asking for Kazuki's team placement on the kid's behalf he would ask about what their test would be and figure out what Kazuki's main course of action would be. Also, do this mean the Hokage knows at least some of what Kazuki has shared with Shikaku? Is that why he special requested Asuma to take on Team 9? I so loved Team 7 and 9's interactions in this! I mean, I loveed Ino before, but this just made me like her more. Her and Chouji's loyalty to Kazuki and willingness to keep his secrets is very endearing - makes me really want to see their, and Asuma's, reactions if they ever experience one Kazuki's nightmares/memories. While I had expected it from Chouji, it was interesting to see Ino already deferring and having so much faith in Kazuki's planning abilities. As for your questions... I can't think of any filler episodes before the exams take place and the only time I can think of that I've seen Konohamaru and Shikamaru together was during Konohamaru's Chuunin exam. Though I am really excited to see any interaction you write of these two! I can so see Konohamaru becoming a member of the dysfunctional Team 7 & 9 family. I love Konohamaru's character, so I hope he gets so more scene time (the crystal ball part, that Asuma saw, gives me hope that he will appear more often.) (Also, so looking forward to seeing if Team 8 ever joins in on the shenanigans.) As far as Chuunin Exam fight request, I guess Kazuki vs. Gaara would be interesting. Or Kazuki against Neji instead of Naruto would also be neat to see. I can just see Naruto watching the fight while screaming at Kazuki to avenge Hinata and show the 'prick' what losers can do. Actually, I think I may prefer to see a fight between Neji and Kazuki more than Gaara vs. Kazuki. Two genius kids, one a known genius and one a genius from the shadows, fighting it out would be rather epic. Still, I think Kazuki would beat. Neji as, despite his bloodline limit, Neji (at that point) is rather short-sighted. I'm not to sure what other fights I would like to see... Maybe Lee vs. Naruto or Kiba vs. Sakura (or Ino)? It would be interesting to see how Ino or Sakura would deal having to fight Akamaru as well as Kiba. Ooooor perhaps Ino vs. Kin? I don't really know, I just can't wait for Kazuki's smarts to shine through. :) Honestly, I have no idea where Haku got his rabbit from... I don't remember if there was an explanation to that, sorry. :( I wonder though, is Team 7 still going to be the ones getting this mission? Ah, the suspense! YOU ROCK SO MUCH. hehe – yay glad you liked the cuddle pile XD Huh, I didn’t think about Team nine’s test like that at all – that’s a new way of thinking about it. The idea was that Asuma noticed that Kazuki didn’t look ‘disturbed’ enough about the test. I figured that Asuma, this time around, was wary about this group of students, so he would be more liable to make things a bit more difficult. I figured he’d notice Kazuki’s expression since Asuma appeared to be one of the first people in canon to notice Shikamaru’s intelligence. (I mean I figure Shikaku would know, but wouldn’t really do much about it, cuz peace time and all). Assuming I understand your questions and speculations correctly, I feel like Shikaku wouldn’t exactly spell out Kazuki’s request to either the Hokage or Asuma, and would most likely disguise it under another reason. Headcanon is that there are motivations and reasons that Hiruzen and Shikaku (and eventually Asuma) will be keeping from one another. For example, Hiruzen’s probably not going to state his role in the massacre, Shikaku doesn’t want to bring additional attention onto Kazuki (yay protective instinct). They’re keeping secrets because they know that the information would affect the other parties’ decision-making. Err and I think some of your other questions will be answered in this chapter. Haha, you’re the second person to mention liking Ino more; makes me crazy excited. But yea, Ino’s definitely one of my favorite characters to write, cuz no matter how I analyze her, she’s just pretty straightforward. It’s really refreshing. Wait, Konohamaru had a Chuunin exam? Herpderp. Didn’t know that. Oh wow, thanks for the detail and the rationale behind the matches! Seriously you’re awesome! Thanks for reviewing!
Dragonflydust: Another awesome chapter. BTW can you do me a favor? If you end up putting Asuma's team along side Kakashi's team during the Wave Mission...can you have Kazuki use Amaterasu on the mercenaries horde at the end of that arc? That would be awesome! :winces: unfortunately, I had something else planned since like I wrote the massacre. I wanted to create more of a divergence from canon – especially since I would be coming back to it for the exams. However, if there’s stuff you like to see for the Chuunin Exams, now’s the time to tell me, since I just scrapped my original outlines for it, thanks for reviewing tho!
Ciel Leon: This fic is amazing! Thanks so much for writing it, its so hard to find great fanfiction that use a side character as the main character and yours is wonderful! I look forward to an update! haha thanks! Yea I started writing this cuz I wasn’t satisfied by the number of Shikamaru-centric non-romance driven stories. Glad you enjoyed!
Elisa1020: What illegal copies? copies of official documents; like when Inoichi made copies of the Uchiha massacre, Shikaku’s been doing the same for his investigation into Danzo
PyrothTenka: Episode Recs - I honestly have no idea. I know I read along with the manga parallel to what I'm writing so I have a solid idea of what's going on during that time. I just have to remember what changes I've made since then, and that method will probably not work for very much longer as my story is growing quickly AU. XD Chuunin Exam Requests - Not really... I love Gaara and Hinata (as individual characters, not as a couple. That would be a strange couple. O_o)... do with that what you will? Or not. Whichever. XD Haku's rabbit - Other than the generalized saying of it being in captivity during the seasonal change and specifically raised for kawarimi? No, I don't think they specifically say. My name is underlined! Woohoo! I don't know what that means, but I'm going to assume it means I'm special. X3 Not much to say about the chapter, it's great transitional stuff. Loving the character interactions, and was mildly surprised by Kazuki being upfront about most of his abilities. The kitties... Itachi, you creeper. XD -Py Haha, I know what you mean. I’ve been keeping a lot of details in my head instead of writing it down or I write it down randomly, so it’s starting to get really disorganized. Thanks for answering my questions!
The One Who Reads Too Much: "The sense that he was missing something was pressing frustratingly at him, but he just couldn't seem to grasp it. Maybe it was time to pay a visit to Neko-baa. Perhaps that old woman would have some insight." Finally! Though, I never had that realization about Kakashi's "I ran into a black cat" excuse until reading this... There was never an explanation for the rabbit, other than the mention that it was 'off color' for the season (white instead of brown), which just makes it even weirder that they would have found one to buy that was that color in the mainland. My guess is they found a certain demon rabbit near a cave (Monty Python & HG) and thought he would make a good pet for the Demon of the Mist. The only reason the rabbit didn't insta-kill Kakashi and the gang is because it Naruto smelled of demon fox, a demon rabbits natural predator. P.S. What's with the underlined names? haha, yea, I spotted that line while I was rereading the manga, and I was like ‘oh hey, that’s convenient’. Just as a warning, the realization won’t be immediate – I mean I don’t think Neko-baa knew what Itachi was up to, but yea… Kazuki’s figuring stuff out XD
Ahahaha, that’s a new explanation. Oh, it was supposed to be special thanks, but then I got nervous that I might have missed someone, especially since I realized that I had a whole list of names missing somehow, so I just kinda stopped midway through. XD
vincent1875: I like the story so far. It seems a bit odd that his brother seems to be one of the last people to know about his capabilities. Sasuke’ll find out… eventually. Between his own secrets and his tendency to focus on himself (in the sense that he doesn’t really see the big picture), he’s been pretty distracted, but Kazuki hasn’t really had the luxury of being very subtle. I think Kazuki sees Sasuke partially as the self-absorbed little bratty brother obsessed with training (not that he thinks Sasuke’s totally selfish, just… self-absorbed if not unreasonably overprotective), and partially as someone who has the potential to be a total incomprehensible jerk (like in canon). The latter is something that’s kind of at the back of his head… but things will change in the arc after this… I think. Thanks for reviewing
urs-v: Oh! I forgotted to write a review! (You deserve at least a "well done" or something. It is really a good story so far. I'm really looking forward to when were gonna have major difference vs canon. Well, the seeds for taht are already planted, and things are starting to diverge more and more!) Well then... Team 7 and 9 new interaction were interesting. I guess the "Konoha 12" is gonna get some far closer link then in canon. Having Naruto hugging Sasuke to death was also a funny contrast to see. I'm just uncertain about the number. I'm pretty much certain that team 9 is Gai's team... Your theory about team making and genin gradation are making sense so far. 'Specially considering the fact that teams can be failed by their sensei and returned to the academy. It wouldn't make sense to have them spend a year when they already are competent. And poor Mizuki. He kind of deserved it, but... And you close it all with that almost cliffhanger with Danzo. Poor Danzo also have it comming. As for your questions; I don't remember Shika and Konohamaru interacting at all. Well at least before the chunnin exam. And there is no filler in that time period. Only a semi-filler with Konohamaru, that showed just sligthly longer interaction beetween Naruto and Konohamaru. And later the Semi-filler with Iruka testing team 7. The wave country arc follow directly the bell test (with only the "mission retreive Sora" at the beggining of an episode) and then it's already the chunnin exam. For the match, my suggestion would be to pick them randomly, there will always be an interesting match. And in the worse case scenario, you can make some sligth modification following your inspiration's flow. The rabbit is just a rabbit. Kept and raised only to be used as kawarimi. We can assume that Zabuza and his men keep some rabbit somewhere so they can always have one ready whenever they need it. Ah sweet! Thanks for leaving such a thoughtful review :) Yupyup, that’s the plan. Hehe, headcanon is that Naruto is still as much of a prankster as in canon, but it just manifests in different ways. Having played with Sasuke so much, I figure knowing what Sasuke’s reaction would be would be half the fun. Yea… I tried looking up the number for Team Gai, but I couldn’t find one. Bonnie was adamant that Team 9 wasn’t Team Gai, so :shrugs:. Tbh, I wouldn’t be surprised if there wasn’t actually a Team 9 at all in canon; apparently some places skip the number 9 in Japan – like you’ll have seats or room numbers with 7, 8, … and then 10. I know in Taiwan, some temples don’t have a floor with the number ‘four’ (which sounds like death in both Chinese and Japanese).
Oops, sorry, I totally rambled. Anyway, thanks for answering my questions!
Greymouser: Because of you I have regained some respect for Shikamaru. Almost all Naruto fanfics I read weren't able to show how awesome Shika is, so thanks for writing the best characterization for him. I love thiss tory and hopes to read more in the future. eheheh, thanks. Honestly, I started this because I had just returned to the Naruto fandom and learned about Itachi’s backstory and Asuma’s death and couldn’t find a fic that satisfied my need for feels XD Glad you enjoyed the fic thus far!
Sethera: That Mizuki drama was intense. I really am starting to feel for him. He's a jerk, but he's caught between a rock and a hard place. And looks like Noa didn't become a villain after all. That's kinda sweet at the end there, though who knows if Shikamaru/Kazuki (Shikaki? Kazumaru? Shikazuki? XD) will listen. Oh well. Also Naruto and Sasuke are amusing as ever. :) And to have Ino and Sakura's antics right afterward is pretty funny. Showing the two rivalries side by side. :) And then Kazuki and Chouji right after...not a rivalry but a best friendship. Which is what Naruto and Sasuke, and Ino and Sakura have too. Omg the fuzziness one after another... Wait... Team Nine? What? (Purposely not overusing "and" and "also" here XD) That was interesting to hear about the jounin placement...still wondering about the number. Urgh it's driving me crazy! Urgh! And yeah, I remember it hit Shikamaru hard when Asuma died. Hopefully that won't happen this time around. And hopefully he won't embarrass himself or make a mistake. I'm wondering what has changed now besides it not being the Ino-Shika-Cho. Seems like Asuma's being a bit stricter on them? Hmm... And of COURSE they do the puppydog pile. You're going to suffocate me with fluffiness. :) lmao I love how Kakashi trails off just like canon. I always thought he was just being mysterious but it's funny how here he's just being absentminded and indecisive. XD ..."His dream's to be a big giant tomato-OWW!" LOL And Kakashi cackling, scaring them, and then them being unimpressed. XD Oh good imagery there. Really did a complete emotional 180 for me. I think it's called emotional whiplash though don't quote me on that. I love having that in my own stories as well, though using too much of it is supposedly bad (btw you don't use too much of it so yeah XD). But yeah I think it's reflective of real life a lot since you have a bunch of happy things and a bunch of sad things together sometimes but sometimes it's an emotional rollercoaster. That can also be a good way to tell the emotional stability of a person. Usually the more stable a person, the less affected or more control they have over whiplashes like that so the effect is lessened. Anyway, I got onto a tangent... -_- So that's how they knew to eat... An Itachi reference, how interesting. So Kakashi is actually meeting Itachi's spies all the time then? Or just using them as excuses? That'd be kinda funny (but probably non-canon) if the reason he was late all the time was because he was intercepting Itachi's spies. Cats vs. dogs. Anyway... Nice recap from the outtakes too. _ Sounds like Kazuki revealed his sharingan to his team and is diverting attention from it...sounds like something he would do. And I was right. Neato. :) Oh yeah he beat Itachi's record. I forgot about that. Oh geez, doesn't he have Mangekyou too? Gawd, I really hope he doesn't go blind...I don't think he'd be able to play shogi then...Unless he would have to memorize the placements in his head and use feel to do it...which I think he could do but it would still suck I think that he would have to learn how to do that. And oh yeah Naruto didn't fail so the Mizuki thing never happened...forgot about that too. XD And poor Mizuki being used...I really am feeling sorry for him now. Plots within plots that he doesn't get... And Danzo being a horrible bastard again. Gawd, I really do hate him... And I have no answers to your questions...I'm horribly useless as always. XD But great update and sorry my review's so late. Hopefully the length will make up for it a little bit. XD Hehe, yep Mizuki’s just a sad jerk. Yea, she was one in one of my earlier drafts, but then I decided that that would be clichéd and boring. XD Hehe, I’m glad you enjoyed the fluffiness. Yea, Kakashi always struck me as someone who kinda gets lost in his head. :D Yay, glad the imagery came out right. Eheh… not sure if it’s emotional whiplash so much as a short attention span ^^; Glad it wasn’t too much, I feel like I jump around a lot at times hehe. But yea no your tangent made sense Eh, the black cat really was just a coincidence. I don’t think I could justify why Kakashi would know about Itachi – at least not well enough to satisfy my inner critic XD Yupyup, I’m working on the theory that the blindness is dependent on the number of times techniques with the mangekyou is activated. Personally, I suspect that the shadow jutsu’s are somewhat linked to vision (at least the comprehension needed to use them), but that’s a totally tangent. Anyway, point is, vision isn’t going to be a problem immediately. Not useless at all – seriously, your reviews are one of the ones I look forwards to the most because they’re so detailed and show me places where I might be misleading. Thanks so much!!!!
8BitNinjaFox: I don't know what I was expecting when I initially read the title and description, but it was NOT this amazing story! You beautiful, amazing, and talented person! I literally stayed up all night reading this. It's so well written and the characters are developed just right. Not to mention the idea itself is very different and out of the box, intriguing, and interesting! Looking forward to more updates! Followed and faved! :D Haha thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed it – hoped you got enough sleep XD So glad the characters are coming out right. Thanks for reviewing :D
NX-Loveless-XN: Why couldn't Kazuki just have tricked Izumi again? So the first time around, the Team Ten just had to retrieve the ‘prize’ from Izumi. This time around, they had to show the coins that they have to show Izumi for the prize, in addition to the prize. Even if they could still trick the prize from Izumi, Izumi doesn’t have all the coins – or know where they are stored. They could try to make counterfeit coins, but they don’t know if the coins are exactly identical; Ooe of them could have been marked or be slightly thicker than the other. Hope that answers your question!
Kiddo20: So I just spent a good portion of my Saturday reading this. And I'm very glad that I did. You are doing something very interesting here and I really am looking forward to seeing how you move on with it. The humor and angst balance out very well, which can be very difficult to do, and you have managed to stay rather true to the characters - again, not an easy task. As a teacher myself, I found myself just laughing through a bunch of the scenes with them in the classroom. Like seriously, wow! Dead on! And I love how loyal he is to Itachi. Somehow you have managed to walk this lovely line between Shikamaru and Kazuki, being simultaneously the same person and different people and I find myself fascinated. Looking forward to the next chapter! Thanks for writing! Ah thanks! I’m glad they seem in character so far. I get more and more antsy as I go, so it’s good to know I haven’t screwed up yet haha. Awww – I’m glad the classroom scenes came out right – they were fun to write. Thanks so much for your thoughtful review! It made my day!
Shaya10: Found this fic by luck and i m so glad i read it! It s so good! I love it! I like time travel and the fact that it is shikamaru is a nice change :D i love the fact that actually, it s not really shikamaru either, it s Kazuki, even with some of shikamaru's memories. Shikamaru and Kazuki are two different people, it is not just shikamaru coming back in time trying to save every body like a hero. No it's Kazuki, Sasuke's and Itachi's brother, the main character: he is still himself even with Shikamaru's memories and personality. When he thinks Mother and Father, it's Uchiha Mikoto and Fugaku that comes to his mind, when he thihnks Sasuke and Itachi, they are his older and twin brothers I like the fact that it is so in character, and that there are no pairings, it stays more in the cannon Naruto that way :) I like how with Shikamaru's memories, Kazuki manages to change some bit here and there in the original timeline - not enough to save his clan unfortunately but enough to have the rookie 9 closer to each other before they were genins, especially Naruto and Sasuke. I think Kazuki's role in those two's lifes is really important. Sasuke didn't lose everything and Naruto found friendship and trust much earlier and easier than with only Sasuke as a rival at first. The thing i love the most is Kazuki and Sasuke's relationship as twins, where they were kids it was really adorable :) i can perfectly imagine Sasuke being a pain always trying to over protect his brother (it made me laugh knowing that Itachi was the one who set Sasuke up onto his twin at first :p), following him everywhere, dragging him everywhere, making sure that he is ok, not having nightmare or not getting sick :) well, Kazuki too always make sure that Sasuke does get hurt or sick as the kid is always training like crazy... yep, i really like the way they are protective to each other. Thanks to Kazuki, Sasuke got pretty close to Naruto, but also Choji and Ino, and then Sakura... At least he didn't spend his childhood all alone after loosing his clan this time around :) 'Shikamaru' and Sasuke are really a good team in this fic - difficult to imagine in cannonbut they really are :) Sasuke is the strongest and he will do anything to protect Kazuki ; Kazuki on the other hand is not as strong but somehow he is always the one who protect the other the most, he is smarter and understands things that Sasuke can't... And more importantly I think he will protect Sasuke from himself. Kazuki is definitely more subtle in his protectiveness, while Sasuke is a real open book : the more he tries to hide it, the more visible his feelings are... Kind of cute actually :p I also really like the dynamics in the ino-shika-cho, with Kazuki. It s funny how Ino would slap/hit Kazuki even if he is her crush's twin. Now that we start their genin days, i am very curious how everthing is going to be done. Between Kazuki's secrets, shikaku's intervention, Danzo's and Orochimaru's plans, not to forget that Itachi knows that Tobi is not Madara and that he is aware of the 'future' memories of his brother... Yep really want to know more about this story! Hope the next chapter would be available soon :) Wow, thanks for the lovely review! I’m glad Kazuki/shikamaru’s turning out well and in character and I’m glad that the stronger bonds between Team 10/9 and 7 are coming across. Yea, originally I didn’t have plans to have Shikamaru and Sasuke as friends, cuz Shikamaru had stated early on that he didn’t like Sasuke in canon, but then I realized that if they were twins that that would change a lot… so that was really developed kinda unintentionally in some ways – I’m glad it turned out well :D
And err, sorry for the long delay XD
Selias: Isn't Asuma's team supposed to be Team 10? Yup. Extended explanation was in the conception notes, but essentially that was one of the changes in this AUverse. Cheers
The Return of Me: Ack, I some how didn't review this already. My complete apologies, i dun goofed. And thank you for listening and replying in your reviews, always nice to be taken seriously. Now in regards to this? Hmm, in a word? ... Dark. Very dark. It makes me wanna say poor Mizuki, but he's, you know, kind of an ass canon verse. Still, dark. But more on that later, I would like to talk 'bout the conception notes. Especially in regards to the whole teacher thing. You say you have experience teaching, which is cool and all, but I'm doubting/hoping that this wasn't in regards to warfare/murder/spying/seduction/using-kickass-jutsu thingys. I mean if it was fair game, you clearly hold authority on these matters and you can skip out on whatever I say. But if not, then some points to consider: I don't think the teams were chosen with the students held in mind, or that the teachers had a whole lot of say in the matter. I always thought it was a Danzo like decision made by the council, they pick what works for the Greater Good. Take Team 7 for example: Naruto stuck on a team that has two eyes-of-spinny-angsty-death, which just happen to be able to control the Demon Fox that resides in his stomach; Sasuke stuck with the one teacher that can help him master the previously mentioned eyes. Or Team 10, composed of the three families who's natural powers fit like a jigsaw puzzle. I could go on, but my point is the teachers probably didn't compose the teams, and if they did it was strictly to benefit the students. A lot of factors to consider. Regarding Naruto and the teachers, well how are you at role-playing Lights? I'm assuming good from most of this story. So running with that, put yourself in what has been roughly established as your average, not Iruka, academy teacher. You are teaching an entire generation to kill for their village, sort of brain-washing them as well I guess, since you'd be trying to avoid the Uchiha like events that the plot revolves around. Keep this in mind as well, just over a decade ago - give or take depending on the age of our hero - a disaster struck where one of the strongest loyal ninja to ever live in your lifetime let loose a demon of Godzilla proportions. As far as you know anyway, cause honestly, who tells teachers anything right? So you have you, a generation of soon to be killers and a national tragedy. Sorry, remind me not to walk and type sometime. Anyway, if you were in that situation and you got given a boy who looks more like the demonic fox than ever, appeared to love tricking people, and rebelled against all forms of authority, would you rise be quick to try and make him an effective killer? No, and you have already said that to be fair, but consider the fact he's gonna be on a team the moment he graduates. Now you're killing him, plus team. No one wants this. Ya' fail him and he never gets near a battle field, never given a chance to learn anything powerful, never has a chance to betray you. Top it all off the fox is still stuck in him, cause remember, that shit reforms some five years after its host dies. Everyone wins! From your evil little view point anyway, you complete Monster. For the team name thing, I'm down with it. Not for your reasons, though that's fine too, but cause it makes sense in my head story wise. Cause he's a completely different clan means a lot would be different, even Asuma's willingness to take them on. So a new team number works fine. Genin thing? Well... no. I mean, fair enough, I can see your reasoning, but no. They're in the academy for years, and all of them attempt it at once. The Chunin thing is different; first you need the recommendation, then your team whole has to agree, and I'm imaging most teams don't get breezed through with minimal fuss cause they have actual family and attentive teachers. Especially not if the exam is in another country. So the numbers and whatnot would be totally different. But you are the writer, so... Mizuki is another thing I could chat about, but there isn't much to say. Oh, and you have just killed him off, so it is rather null and void. I'll just say that if he was working with snake face then there were bound to be people on the inside that would help him upwards. The Hokage only does so much. So him getting into the class not really that surprising in my mind. There's a point, how many spies does ol' slinky have in the village? I mean, surely a genin and teacher can't be it. And how many would Shikamaru be aware of? Anyway, Chapter stuff! Please let the next one be this long, it's great. I thought this one read really well too, it was divided nicely and the pacing was pretty constant. Gonna be honest though, I prefer the interactions you do between the Rookies the most. The rest of it is good, but I may be guilty of skimming a little. I don't have much to add at this point, maybe next chapter... Q&A: 1 - Got nothing on that I'm afraid, though surely our Nara would have been raised to respect him as the "honourable grandson" or something. Probably found it troublesome. 2 - I don't know how you plan to match up, though I would rather like to see how Puppetman matches up to someone that can tell the difference between him and Crow from the get go. Like anyone from Team 8. That or Tenten, cause all those weapons would sure be effective anyway. 3 - Not to my knowledge. Head-canon? I think the devilish duo spent a lot of time back home working on the rebellion thing. So Haku probably kept it. Seems really likely actually, Haku having a pet bunny. I wonder what it would be called... What's "indispensable tool" in Japanese? Anyway, sorry about not doing this sooner, and sorry about breaking it up. My bad... With that in mind, could you tell us when the next one might be up? Like on your profile or something? Teaching stuff: Yea hell no, if I ever did teach stuff related espionage and such, I’d probably get them all killed. Haha ^^;. So if I understand your point correctly, you believe that the teams were constructed by a council with a similar mindset to Danzo, where the ‘Greater Good’ are teams that can do a lot of damage and will listen to the administration? (I wasn’t sure what you meant by ‘Greater Good’). Now I think there’re some crossed wires since I thought that a lot of your points about Naruto being placed on a team with Kakashi and the construction of team ten had already been addressed in the conversation between Shikaku and Kazuki in chapter 14. I’m guessing that the point you most disagree with is the idea that the teams construction are subjected to just the teacher’s opinions? Now to clarify my position, yes, I thought that the teams were constructed mostly by the teachers – but at the same time, the teachers were constrained by clan politics, parental opinions, parental opinions, funds, etc. I’ve overheard professors and teachers complain a lot about the restrictions on what they can teach and how they teach in RL, so I figured the same applied here – sorry if that wasn’t clear. The closest thing to a council with Danzo’s POV would be the parent/clan-heads, and I think they would be more focused on their students, but no, I didn’t really think of a whole separate education council for my headcanon.
Naruto(?): In regards to your last paragraph of your first review…I’m assuming it’s in response to my comment about the self-defeating nature of teachers sabotaging Naruto in fanfics? If that is the case, then please excuse me, that was poorly worded. Yes, I understand how grief can destroy rationale. Instead of stating “I never got” I should have stated, “I think it’s stupid”. I have seen the exact argument that you’ve proposed in several fanfics. I’m not saying that I think the authors are dumb, I just think that the whole situation is stupid.
If they let him graduate with a grade average of say 10%, then he isn’t an effective killer regardless of how the Academy is viewed. If Naruto’s a danger to the team, the jounin’s test should identify that, in which case, he’s bounced between having ‘graduated’ from the Academy and not being able to get on a jounin’s team, or the jounin purposefully neglects the boy and gets him killed. Either way, the instructor doesn’t have to deal with something s/he hates anymore.
Genin/Chuunin Exams: With the genin thing, I never found concrete evidence that the whole class takes it at one point. I also made the decision based on naruto’s age and graduation attempts. With the Chuunin exams, assuming you are addressing the number of exams a year… it’s stated in the manga to take place twice every year and that teams need to have completed 8 missions to qualify. (Tbh, I had imagined that the exams were somewhat like the Olympics until I went through the source material. In hindsight, I think it makes more sense that it takes place so often given Kabuto’s history).
General: yea no, I prefer writing the Rookies as well – despite the length, I probably wrote the last chapter the fastest. The problem is that the non-rookie stuff is kinda important for events in the Chuunin Exam. No worries about breaking up the review – thanks for taking the time to write out your thoughts… even if I’m not sure I understood everything XD
I try to commit to update information in my profile, so if date’s aren’t up there, it means that either I’m still really unhappy with the chapter outline or that my beta’s schedule is a bit hectic.
Shadow of Flame: Okay, a couple questions, some of them related to previous chapters. 1. Did Gai's team graduate the year before the Rookie Nine? Or is this Gai's team's graduation year, and the Rookie Nine graduate next year? 2. When Kazuki gave Shikaku the document of his memories, wouldn't some of them have made it obvious he wasn't an Uchiha in his memories/dreams? Or did he write it in such a way to make it seem like he was? 3. I've noticed inconsistencies with naming conventions-sometimes it's Western style (first last) other times, Asian (family given). Although some places one or the other is better for dramatic effect-like if Kazuki were to reveal his old identity, it could be more dramatic to say Shikamaru Nara. Anyway, any reason for that, or did it just happen? 4. I know there was something else, but I can't remember it right now. Great job. Hiya 1. Team Gai graduated the cycle before Rookie Nine. Some people have mentioned that they thought Team Gai was named Team Nine, but I couldn’t find any mention of that in the wiki nor the manga translations that I read. 2. Headcanon is that yes, Kazuki’s documents are edited to hide his background (as well as Sasuke’s defection) and that they are more of a series of character profiles than a true timeline. I’ve been trying to figure out a way to address that in the story, but every attempt ends up in a pretty boring scene, so I’m holding off on that until after this arc I think. 3. YES! I’m glad someone noticed that haha. I was really surprised no one had brought that up – I’ve also been inconsistent with the capitalization stuff, and that’s mainly because I changed my mind/forgot midway through and never got around to fixing it. It was a little more challenging than I expected to both decide and remember which Western and which Eastern references I would use. I think I’ve edited that all out now. 4. Thanks for reading :D
yorushihe: Myyy ! Awesome! You have so many things rolling at the same time, it must be hard to keep up with them! And using Shikamaru instead of a SI is brilliant! The changes he brought are nice too, such as Sasuke's more lightheart.. Though I wanna see Itachi T.T Anyhow! I love your writing and descriptions :) Dont mind if I follow this from now on! omg it so is. I totally wish I hadn’t gone down some of these plot decisions now, but whatever. Comments like yours make it worth it :D. I’m trying with Itachi XD He’s such a subtle character that it’s hard to show what I want to show with him. Hoping to drop hints of him some more though. Thanks for reviewing!
SNicole25: How would they frame Shikaku? I love how well you've incorporated Shikamaru into the roll of an Uchiha. You've done a very neat and interesting job. I'd love to read more of this. Frame Shikaku? Are you talking about Danzou framing Shikaku? Thanks so much, I’m glad you’ve enjoyed!
A Mistake: This has got to be one of my top three time-travel Naruto fanfics on ffnet. There are so many great aspects of it that I can find in oher fics, but rarely together in one story. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways: 1) Interesting premise: Usually the character going time-travelling is Naruto, but that's not the case here. Shikamaru is a character with a lot of potential and not enough screen time and one wonders at what he could do with the right motivation; the problem being, of course, that he prefers to stay out of trouble than jump headlong into them like Naruto would. Being dropped right in the middle of the Uchiha clan's intrigue with future/past knowledge where he has a ver personal stake to save his new family is certainly enough. Kudos for setting that up. 2) The age-appropriate behaviour. I cannot stress this enough. I don't know how many fics I read in which the characters are supposed to be geniuses and act like miniature teenagers while childhood doesn't work that way. Not even with young geniuses (and I've seen enough of them). The way you keep the children's maturity level at more-or-less their age, while still ensuring that they are essentially the characters we know and love from Naruto, is a stellar balancing act. 3) Having enough future knowledge does not always ensure that the past can be changed enough. This is especially true when the ball had started rolling for a while and is far bigger than the extent of the main character's influence. Thank you very much for not making Shikamaru/Kazuki an overpowered Sue. I feel that the challenges that he faces in the past/future alternate dimension is realistic. 4) Great pacing. The story doesn't drag and the tension kepts ratcheting up in the early chapters as Shika/Kazuki race against the clock in order to gather enough information to find out what was going on _and_ prevent the massacre from happening. The friendship with Chouji and Naruto is also heartwarming instead of trite, and the scene on the Nara lands showed just how much Shika/Kazuki is missing his old family. Poor guy. Keep up the great work! I hope you're inspired to go binge-writing several chapters in a row. In fact, if you were to ask for my firstborn, I believe I'm prepared to sit on the bargaining table... Wow. Just wow. Your review just makes me ecstatic – I’m so happy someone saw all the balancing acts I thought I flailing around with, so thank you so much for not only seeing that but also telling me that it’s all worked XD. I saw your review after I’d deleted yet another scene out frustration and so it was a really huge help. Thank you so, so, so much!
Reader: This is one of the best fan fictions on the site. At first I wasn't sure about the plot since it seemed a bit forced just from reading the story and I was afraid of reading a fan fiction where Shikamaru or Kazuki just replaces Sasuke or that he would be over powered and compete with Naruto for the role of hero or whatever. I was hesitant but your story is ANYTHING BUT cliche forced or any adjective that implies negative descriptors, except many that chapters are far and few from up dates points but the length of your chapters are enough to compensate. Don't you hate it when an author hasn't updated in like 6 months and their newest chapter is only like a 500 words and then they are like lol i forgot that i was a fan fiction author. Of course everyone has a life outside fan fiction is its understandable. Just so you know even if it takes you years to finish the story i will honestly put in an effort to finish reading the story as you post it. I think that your plot was really well thought out. The stories show that you really thought about what each character would do like how you played on Shikamaru's connection with Suna and how Kazuki isn't crazy over power and any abilities he does have is 100% supported by the plot. Also all of his interactions are carefully planed and the plot shows great connection and continuity. I do understand that it is hard to set the plot since the manga keeps on throwing all these crazy revelations and such which would reek havoc on the outline. Also just the whole time travel reincarnation mixed in is just a crazy but awesome combination. Ok now i am done rambling. Good Luck push forward and I hope to see another amazing chapter in the future. :) Oh thank goodness XD haha glad everything makes sense! And yea, sorry about the delayed update, and I know what you mean about the short chapters. I think I’ve been lucky so far that most of the scenes just kind of demand to be put together in one chapter, with the exception of this chapter, so I didn’t really have to worry about chapter lengths for the most part. I totally agree with you on the manga curveballs! At first I thought it was getting really ridiculous, but in hindsight, some of the revelations do kind of fit. I kinda feel like Kishimoto’s just having fun, cuz screw it, it’s almost over for him. Idk, I think it’s reaching the point where I can say that Shikamaru isn’t aware of anything beyond this point – at this for this story anyway. Thanks for the well wishes and for leaving such a lovely review!
Crystallea1321: This is a brilliant story Shika/Kazu is fun and I love him! Also, I want more Kazu/Shikaku interactions! And well, more everything. I really like this one. It's fun and so interesting. And could we have a Kazu/Itachi scene soon? Please? I want to see Itachi's confusion at Kazuki's figuring out about his little game. It would be fun! So more soon, pleeeeaaaasssseeeee? *puppy-eyes no jutsu* XD heh heh heh… uhh no Kazu/Shikaku interactions for awhile. Itachi just seems to refuse my efforts to have Kazuki reach him, but the plan is to get some sort of communication going hopefully within the next arc, but no promises. Thanks for reviewing!
HOLY REMIX*: now this is my type of shiet! I can't tell you how sick i am of the typical naruto couples and I just have to say Thankyou for not adding in romance into this- it would completly it off anyways. the way this story is friendship would just work the best while everyone focus on becoming better and not on petty crushes, yah kno. I do have to say that I was really, really hopeing that mikoto and shisui would somehow be spaired but then again the sauce hasn't been acting all revenge like so far and seems to be re-thinking about what happened with itachi. can't wait to see what happens next with snake freak, his trusty sidekick and the eye snatcher.. Haha, tbh I’m not sure I could write romance with the characters as they are anyway; I’m also the type of person who’s ticked off at the mid-action kiss scene in movies cuz they make zero sense. On another aside, I actually wasn’t completely sure Shisui was dead until the whole filler arc came out – which was after I’d written the scene in such a way to give me enough room to write Shisui back in if it turned out he was alive. But well, yea, to avoid overcomplicating matters as they are, Shisui’s prolly dead for good, which bums me out a little as well. I’m a little surprised at how well Mikoto’s been received tho. Glad everyone’s liked her. Heh. Sasuke’s definitely going to be distracted. Thanks for dropping a review!
Millenia-the-wings-of-valmar: I think you should do the Kakashi's Mask epi. I love your story so far. I like that you have a bunch of different pov' you update soon REPLY HERE
Zaraethian Empress: Oh my god! I just wanted to get that out first, but seriously this is one superb story. I just read through all the chapters in one go. Its clear that you work hard and it looks and reads so well. I can't begin imagining how you write Shika. I have thought that regardless of how he's depicted, he's a genius, with multiple lines of thoughts running through his head. You write him so very well. Because after naruto Shikas my favorite. So an awesome job, update soon :O lol, maybe it’s cuz I’ve already reread these chapters so many times over the course of writing and editing, but reading them all in one go seems exhausting – so glad my writing can be read all at once! The nice thing about Kazuki (which is really what saved me), is that he’s lazy and not exactly proactive in both action and thought, so I can kinda have an excuse for why he might not have seen/done something in general. Itachi would be a completely different story. Haha. Thanks for the review!
immortal chord: holy geez! shikamarus/kazuki is a cutie (i feel like a pedophile for saying that), now i really want him to have a girlfriend..i'm surprised none of his (female) classmates are all over him like they are with sasuke, is it because he's always sleeping? Lol. Um, my personal experiences with romance are kinda limited/disastrous/a comedy-show and I’m a bit of a dunce, so I’m going off of intuition and popular culture here. I think crushes have a little to do with ‘ideals’ and public perception, like a person fits a certain type or image. In canon, Sasuke was often praised by the teachers, was number one in class standings, and was generally silent – so I think it was easy to equate him to a ‘fairy tale’ prince. Kazuki, on the other hand, doesn’t have the approval of the teachers, doesn’t display any ‘cool’ skills, has been caught drooling on his desk because he’s sleeping so much, and has otherwise wrecked his image. Moreover, he sleeps so much, that for first-appearances, he’s pretty boring (which I think was kind of the case for Shikamaru- no one seemed to know that he was a genius when he was in the Academy). There might have been an air of ‘mystery’ or ‘tragedy’ after the massacre, but Ino pretty much popped that atmosphere before it could form.
yellowolfe: I'm merely another reviewer reminding you that its been a couple months since your last update. I know you must get tired of reviews like this but i just read all the current chapters in a day and really liked it! except for the new name of shikamaru, but that's my problem. the Uchiha can't name their kid Shikamaru. well, update soon! <3. Not ‘merely’. Tbh, even before I wrote this story, I’ve become kinda blind to the ‘update soon’ because it appears so often – sorta like the whole ‘how are you?’ greeting, so your review was a nice reminder that people were still interested. Yea… I know what you mean about Shikamaru’s new name. tbh, I still prefer his old name, but I haven’t figured out a convincing way for him to get his old name back :/ Thanks for the review!
McAwesome: So, this has got to be my third time reading this story, or what you have so far on it. There's so much to chew on in your writing that I HAVE to read it multiple times to actually catch everything that is going on. At first that kinda annoyed me, and I was like, "man. I wish that it would just come out and say if this happened or if this person is actually feeling this." After awhile, though, I actually grew to really, really appreciate this. It such a more in depth experience. Usually, when I come across the inkling of a suspicion that isn't explicitly stated when I'm reading fics, I ignore it. Why? Well, most writers don't purposefully use inference as a tool - they just spoon-feed the readers everything. This is not the case with this fic. Almost everything that REALLY matters, everything that really makes the fic enjoyable, must be read between the lines. It adds a whole other level of depth to the story. Thank you. Some things I really love about this fic: 1) The Sasuke - Kazuki relationship. Expertly done. I love that Kazuki isn't just a misplaced Nara - he's a caring brother. I love the dynamic between these two. One of my favorite parts of this entire thing concerning this relationship is during the Uchiha massacre when Sasuke recognizes that Kazuki's smile was too big and too fast - his post nightmare smile. Ah, this moment is so small, but it made me so happy. All of the little moments like this that really show the depth of the relationship between them really, almost by themselves, make this fic worth reading for me. I keep wanting Kazuki to tell Sasuke about his sharingan, but at the same time, I sorta understand why he doesn't. (All of your other relationships are also really REALLY well done. Kakashi - Naruto, Naruto - Kazuki, Kazuki - Choji, Kazuki - Ino, Ino - Sakura, heck, even Mikoto - Kazuki, though we didn't see that one as much.) 2) The Itachi - Kazuki dynamic. Come home, Itachi! Please come home, and find out how incredibly awesome your little brothers are! (This was separate from point 1 just because of how much I enjoyed this dynamic. This is really the first story where I really understand AND really like Itachi.) 3) How believable it all is. To be honest, when I first saw the premise of this story, I avoided it like the plague. I didn't think there would be any possible way to pull it off well. But, y'know, I DID end up giving it a try (obviously), figuring that if it was bad, I didn't have to read much. I'll tell you what, this was seriously one of the best stories I have read, partly just because of how I could totally see everything you wrote actually happen. It is so well done. Shikamaru/Kazuki, while having all of the skills he SHOULD have, isn't totally overpowered. The relationship between basically everyone in the story (again) is superb. The changes that were made in the timeline are totally legitimate, and I honestly couldn't see it going any other way. ...anyway, I could go on for a very long time. In fact, I probably will come back later today with new points of things I love about this story and post again. Anyway, good work. Well done. Ten billion points. I'm on the edge of my seat, waiting for more, whenever you write/post it. Ok, this review made me ecstatic, and I’m so happy that this story is worth rereads! Tbh, I just finished a reread/edit of the last fifteen chapters, which made me realize that some of the references I made were seriously too subtle, so I totally get your annoyance- I was a bit irked at myself XD I get impatient sometimes when I think there’s too much dancing around a subject, so please don’t hesitate to let me know if I’ve done that again. (It’s the whole ‘everything made sense in my head’ type of thing, you know? Haha) 1. Yay! I swear, a lot of their relationship developed as I wrote the story because Sasuke was one of my least favorite characters before I started the story. (The sharingan thing is coming up for this arc… at least for my current plans XD) 2. :D Itachi’s a favorite of mine, but so hard to write… and I think that’s all I can really say on the matter ^^; 3. <3 <3 <3. Yea, tbh, it still surprises me how many people actually like this story. I really started the story out of frustration at the number of clichés being used. I also never would have thought I would have written a story centered on a character in the Uchiha clan, cuz that had been the overdone rage like five years ago I think. … and then I realized there was no way Shikamaru would have the motivation to really believe/investigate in Itachi’s innocence or the massacre so … this happened haha. Thank you for your lovely review! It made my day.
Ocicat: Mhhh, but the farther this goes the more the question arises as to why not share (show) all that war information with his previous clan/allies? (not that there's much less doubt about accuracy) He can hardly match their resources & and experience to make as much a difference alone... Ok, I hope it’s clear why Kazuki didn’t share the information before the Massacre. As for after the massacre, tbh, I was originally going to have the information shared with the Chouza and Inoichi in a similar fashion as Shikaku, but then I realized that the information could be shared, but just not ‘presented’ as future knowledge, if that makes any sense. In plainer terms, Kazuki gave Shikaku a coded report, that Shikaku believed was an outline – which it was. But for the outline to make any sense, there had to be profiles, explanations and analysis of the people involved, which I think Kazuki would have focused on more, rather than chronology or events. It’s a point I have been trying to insert in, but haven’t managed to figure out how – at least not to my satisfaction. In any case, Shikaku has been looking into these character profiles, and sharing that information, which I think is much more useful since his claims can be immediately substantiated. But I don’t think these points will become clear until after the end of this coming arc. … does that make sense?