her jaw’s been clenched for so long, she fears it might actually be stuck that way. still, she can’t loosen up — not without total risk of verbally assaulting the genius who has been entrusted with taking orders in her section. coffee. lorelai had ordered coffee. what did he bring her ? a muffin. a bran muffin, at that ( a double offense, in her book ). then it was a fish. a whole fish ! with the eye and everything, all deep fried and — blech. she shudders just thinking about it. on his third trip, he brings coffee cake. closer, sure ! but not quite. ❝ you know what they say.. fourth’s time the charm.. ❞ lorelai had told him, her cheer half - assed & clearly forced. he turns away, happy to try again. his confidence, completely unearned & yet, somehow, unfaltering. thud. lorelai’s forehead drops to the table the moment she’s gone. he didn’t even leave the coffee cake. ❝ does anyone have a list of people who have murdered their waiters and gotten away with it ? i’m looking for heroes. ❞