I must admit I feel ashamed... I feel ashamed of my desire to see them again after their therapy. It is totally not professional and totally against an ethical rule.
I feel ashamed to desire something that is deemed "Wrong". I feel very bad about it, and then I don't know what to do about it. I feel totally torn apart between following the Rule and following what I believe in.
I don't know what is truly Right to do. What's the best to do? Is it really to respect this rule or to break it? Will I be a nuisance to them and even myself if I decide to break it? Or will I miss out something unimaginably important if I don't?
I can't know... Or if they are truly The One, then we are supposed to meet again even if I choose to respect the rule... But is it a test from life where I need to confront the comfortable choice that is to follow the rule? Wtf am I supposed to do? Even spiritually I am left out without cues to which to choose...
The sole advice I got from my tarot cards is to live the present moment, to enjoy the time spent with them, and the cards refuse to tell me anything about the future, the future being constantly represented by "Mystery" cards.
This situation sucks hard. I do not recommend.
Why do I always get involved in the most heartbreaking situations? Like, why Life? You think I had it too easy so better stab her heart a couple of times?? Seriously, I am sad, stop...