if regal and desire were real, regal would be running for his local school board and desire would be the cartoonishly evil operator of his campaign's facebook page. she is selling regal for board of education t-shirts for $35. her blocklist grows every day. she blocks #haters in the comment section and then makes ten posts pissing on them back-to-back at 2 a.m. occasionally her tirades will be interrupted by an inspirational quote edited on top of a wildflower field. she has an email list of all the major republicans in the city and they've all agreed to bullet vote for regal. if you roll down your window at a busy intersection you might see desire in her chunky sunglasses + pilates clothes ripping the incumbents' signs out of the ground and flinging them into traffic