today i learned that there was a gay couple in a 1st gen group that caused the group to disband and korean media isnt allowed to talk about them at all and they fled to the u.s. to be safer. i really hope thats not true but it sounds possible. when i learn things like this i feel guilty about shipping kaisoo because if they are real and outed their careers would be ruined just like them and they would be so unhappy. would would kaisoo blogs do if theyre outed, celebrate? it just sounds wrong...
This ask is a couple of months old. Hopefully you are still around anon. 😊
I am not sure which first gen group you are referring to. There was a group called K’Pop but the story of their disbandment is very different than you’ve described. The members were not outed but two members were in a volatile relationship together and their volatility ultimately created a rift within the group which caused them to disband.
They did not flee to the United States AFAIK. One of the members had a moderately successful career after the group disbanded. They performed as the group K’Pop as recent as 2019 2018 on South Korean television.
So moving on…if you feel guilty about shipping kaisoo it could be because you mistake people who are supportive of Kai soo as being the same as people want kaisoo to be forcibly outed. But here’s the thing: a person who is supportive and ships people - real or fictional - as a couple whether the couple be gay or straight is not doing anything other than being supportive of people that they think have chemistry and that they like to see together. Public figures are fully aware of shipping culture. There are companies that even encourage it. There are companies that do not. There are performer’s who play up fan service and there are performers who don’t. A person who would feel jubilant by the forcible outing of a couple or by publishing information that would forcibly out a couple is not someone who supports the couple at all. That is someone who feels entitled to have their suspicions confirmed. That is someone who cares more about what they want. That is a selfish morally superior person who feels that closeted individuals owe the world honesty without looking at what honesty would cost them. And personally I think it’s horrible of anyone to think that they are owed a concrete answer whether or not kaisoo are dating if kyungsoo or jongin are not ready to answer. Maybe it could even be that they are not allowed to answer because their careers and livelihoods depend on their silence. That is absolutely fine for them to protect themselves, their careers and their relationship. And really if it were harmful to them for fans to say, “oh we think they are together and they’re cute together” or for people to fly banners with Kaisoo and other couplings then their interactions would have been minimized as a signal to fans that ya barking up the wrong tree. And yea…we are all assuming but people can safely assume sexuality, not be shouted down and told they are problematic when it comes to heterosexuality and boy-girl couplings so folks should keep that same energy when it comes shipping two guys or two girls. We are allowed to speculate based on their interactions and their words. We aren’t forcing or projecting anything onto them. We are just speculating based on their interactions and words.
When it comes to fandoms who are supportive of LGBTQ+ relationships there seems to be such a negative narrative associated and maybe that is because shippers are stereotyped as forever-alone desperate losers who believe in strange conspiracy theories that fan fiction oppa as gay because they cannot handle it if he is into vagina cause he would never be into their vagina. So they inflate kismet mountains outta coincidental molehills and their ultimate dream is for the people they ship together to be caught inflagrante delicto and outed in the media so they can finally be happy together and yea, maybe there is a minority of disturbed individuals who salivate over those thoughts. But those people exist on the fringes of shipping communities. It’s unfortunate and immature.
People who ship kaisoo because they are genuinely supportive and just want them to be happy together do not want any harm to come to them and being outed without permission is harmful. I would feel sad for them and worried about them. The shipping/support community is very different from sasaen/obsessive stalkers. No one in the kaisoo community that I have encountered AFAIK invades their privacy and fandoms are not responsible for what Korean media choose to report. In South Korea people can be sued for reporting information that negatively affects a person’s reputation whether it be truthful legitimate information or a lie and South Korean media is prohibited from forcibly outing anyone.
Thanks for the ask. Hope I answered all of your concerns. 😊 (edited to add photo references)