About how a song carried by the wind connected two creatures, of the sky and the sea.
A tsubamari-focused fantasy AU, loosely inspired by the Caelum et Ocean event from Love Nikki Dress Up Queen game (but to be honest, it really became its own thing later on). Fairly my biggest AU content-wise, as it doesn’t have a clear storyline - it’s just a collection of cute moments of a cast of fantasy creatures! Since it’s really scattered content-wise, I figured it needs a masterpost of its own.
🌸Sea Breeze (fanfic)
Breeze started as a fanfic! It’s fairly short, and serves as an introduction to the AU - how Maria and Tsubasa met, and what difficulties their relationship might face!
Fanfic link - [x]
First chapter announcement (including the artwork) - [x]
Second chapter announcement (including the artwork) - [x]
🌸Marine Snow
Marine Snow is a continuation of Sea Breeze, set a year after the first fanfic’s conclusion! I advise to see all the comics down below before reading first, but this is the first main story progression.
Fanfic link - [x]
Fanfic announcement (including the artwork) - [x]
🌸Worldbuilding
Includes reference sheets and some general explanations of the species, aside from the lore you could find in the fics.
First main visual - [x]
Maria and Tsubasa’s reference sheets - [x]
Hibiki, Chris and Miku’s reference sheets - [x]
Kirika and Shirabe’s reference sheets - [x]
Stuff about locations - [x]
About magic (twitter-exclusive) - [x]
🌸Artwork
Smaller artworks and comics that continue the main story. Breeze doesn’t exactly have a storyline, it’s mostly a cute little slice of life thing!
Illogical fears - [x] [x]
Whaley - [x]
Lake date - [x]
Sleepovers - [x]
Gifts - [x]
Family dinner - [x]
Straight mermaids - [x]
My fishie - [x]
Flower - [x]
Beach activities - [x]
Stargazing - [x]
Living with a poly - [x]
Pendants - [x]
Swimming - [x]
September - [x]
Animals - [x]
Marine Snow teaser - [x]
Clingy - [x]
Fish - [x]
[Here is when Marine Snow happens]
Sitting - [x]
Winter - [x]
Breeze in doodle compilations - [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Hoooo boy, this one’s a beast. Tsubasa's guilt over that infamous XV concert makes for some great drama, but actually getting in that kind of vulnerable headspace to write it was... intense. Hopefully I did her justice. Thanks to Winglet on Discord for commissioning this fic! If you’d like to commission a fic yourself, click here to find out how!
As always, I’ll post the fic below the Keep Reading bar for those who prefer to read on Tumblr over AO3. Be sure to like, comment, kudos and all that nonsense if you enjoyed it, and feel free to check out the rest of my Symphogear fanfics, most of which take place in the same continuity! Thank you so much, and I hope you like it!
Tsubasa woke up sweating.
Her senses all rushed back in at once. Cold. Damp. Dark. Her stomach heaved in panic. She sat bolt upright and yanked her knees to her chest. Desperately, she tried to stop trembling. Calm down. Calm down.
She breathed. Deep, gulping breaths. Her heartrate slowed. Her pulse calmed. Her roiling guts began to settle. Gradually, her surroundings coalesced around her. The comfortable bed. Walls painted a soft, soothing purple. A stream of moonlight piercing the window. She was still in her room, right where she’d fallen asleep earlier that evening. Everything was normal. Everything was fine.
The girl stared at her, silently begging to be saved.
Tsubasa’s stomach heaved again. She clapped a hand over her mouth and doubled over. Oh, no you don’t.
The bed shifted next to her. “Tsubasa?”
Tsubasa swore silently. In her panic, she’d forgotten about her girlfriend. “Sorry,” she whispered. “Didn’t mean to wake you up.”
“S’fine.” Maria propped herself up on her elbows. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.” Tsubasa lay back down. “Just a bad dream.”
The monster’s sickening laugh rang through the air.
“Another one?”
“It’s no big deal, really.”
That was a lie, of course, and she had no doubt Maria had already seen through it. Both of them knew full well how big a deal these nightmares were.
“Tsubasa.” Maria’s tone was soft, but stern.
Tsubasa winced. Knew it. Like she could ever fool her. Even before they started going out, her girlfriend always had an uncanny ability to see through her defense mechanisms. It was almost insulting sometimes. How could another person know her so well? Almost better than she knew herself?
“It’s the same as always,” she mumbled. She couldn’t bring herself to meet Maria’s gaze. “The concert hall. Noise showing up out of nowhere. People dying. And then…”
The girl screamed, her eyes full of blood.
Her pulse began to race. She lay a hand on her chest, closed her eyes, tried to breathe. Anything to keep her mind from spiraling into chaos again.
How long had it been? Nine months, at this point? Maybe more like ten? Close to a year, that much was certain. And still the memories haunted her. Memories of blood and death. People bursting into dust. Rushing around in terror, helplessly trying to save anyone, everyone, until-
Her body collapsed in on itself like wet newspaper.
“Hey.” Maria caressed Tsubasa’s cheek from behind. “I’m here.”
“I know.” Tsubasa inhaled painfully. Shame trickled through her veins. If only she could turn around and look Maria in the eyes. How much easier things would be if she were that strong.
It had taken her a long time to process that fateful day. The trauma of the event itself, her subsequent brainwashing, the thicket of raw emotional wounds torn open across the battle with Noble Red. On her better days, she could almost laugh about it. How unlucky could one person be? If her life were a movie, it would surely be mocked as edgy suffering porn. 3/10, the writers were trying way too hard to emotionally manipulate the audience. Learn the value of subtlety already.
But those good days never lasted. Far more frequent were the days where she wanted to curl up in a ball and stop existing. Just phase out of reality for a few hours and forget everything she’d gone through. Forget the terror, forget the screaming, forget the slaughter, forget that screaming, bloody face-
Her glazed eyes sunk into her skull.
She clutched her stomach. It was no good. No matter how hard she tried, the image of the girl who died in front of her refused to fade. The details flooded her senses unexpectedly, crept up on her in the dead of night, ambushed her when she smelled something burning. She couldn’t even light the fireplace without ending up shaking on the floor. Months later, it was still as vivid as the day it happened.
“Oh, Tsubasa…”
A sudden warmth; Maria was hugging her. The sensation made her heart skip a beat. Then it twisted in guilt. Idiot. What do think you’re doing, feeling romantic at a time like this?
“Sorry,” she mumbled again. Her eyes felt hot. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.
Maria was silent for a moment. Then, she said; “You’re free tomorrow, right?”
Tsubasa blinked. “I… yes?”
“Good.” Maria squeezed her gently. “We’re going to the amusement park, then. Change of pace.”
“We’re what?” Tsubasa turned in surprise. “Maria-“
“You could use the break.” Maria gazed at her. “Unless you’re really against it?”
Tsubasa’s breath caught in her throat. The moonlight seemed to illuminate Maria’s pale skin like a lantern, stars sparkling in her eyes. She felt herself flushing from her nose to the backs of her ears. How are you so…
“I-I guess that’s fine,” she stammered. “But I haven’t been in a while.”
“I’ll be your guide. Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you have a good time.”
Tsubasa nodded anxiously. “Alright, then.”
She closed her eyes. Better save these worries for the morning; not like she could do anything about them now. Tomorrow will be better, she told herself. Just relax.
It was a long time before she got back to sleep.
* * *
She was right; tomorrow was, indeed, better.
Sure, the late autumn wind was bitterly cold. And sure, she was too wary to attempt any of the bigger rides. But there was something deeply refreshing about getting out of the house. Between grappling with her trauma and helping SONG deal with the aftermath of the fight against Shem-ha, she’d barely had a chance to just go out and have fun. Apparently, she’d been missing that more than she realized.
At first, Maria and her just wandered around, stopping whenever something caught their eyes. There was an axe-throwing booth by the log flume; Tsubasa handily took the top prize. Later on, she beat Maria at the shooting gallery. But Maria paid her back at the bumper cars. As it turned out, recklessly crashing motorcycles for a living was not a skill that translated to collisions in a controlled environment. Her mind was still rattling from the impacts as they left the stadium behind.
“I would’ve won without the guardrails,” she muttered.
“Oh, please,” Maria laughed. “You’re lucky they were there to stop you from flipping over.”
She skipped along, humming. Watching her, Tsubasa felt her bad mood melt away. To think they’d only been dating for a couple months. How did I get so damn lucky?
“Look, they have funnel cake!”
Tsubasa looked up. Sure enough, there was a big neon sign advertising it at the nearby snack booth. “You like funnel cake?” she said. “That’s a surprise.”
“Why? Because idols aren’t supposed to eat heavy foods?” Maria flashed a teasing smile at her.
Tsubasa felt herself flushing again. Flirt. “Because an elegant lady like you scarfing down artery-clogging fair food goes against the laws of God.”
“Hmmm.” Maria pretended to puzzle over it for a bit. “Then, it’s a good thing we already punched God in the face.”
Tsubasa rolled her eyes. “Alright, you win this round.”
Maria smiled. “If you say so.”
She turned back to the sign. “Back in England, funnel cake was my favorite fair snack. But it’s nowhere near as common in Japan. It’s been so long since I’ve had it, and now it’s right in front of me.” She stretched eagerly. “Fate is truly smiling upon us today, don’t you think?”
Tsubasa stifled a laugh. She never knew how much of a goofball Maria could be until they started dating. But that was the beauty of it all, wasn’t it? Every day was a new discovery. Every day she found a new reason to love this pink-haired goddess. Maybe one day, she’d be brave enough to say them all out loud.
“You might want to look at the line to get them,” she remarked. “Is fate smiling on that as well?”
Maria’s face fell; the line for the funnel cakes was longer than some of the rides. It would take over half an hour just to reach the counter. “Guess I wasn’t the only one missing them,” she mumbled.
Tsubasa smiled. How adorable. “We can wait,” she said.
“Ae you sure?” Maria’s voice barely concealed her gratitude.
“I’ve never had them myself. If you’re that fond of them, I can’t be missing out.”
Maria beamed. “You’re wonderful,” she purred.
Shit. Tsubasa hid her blushing cheeks. “L-let’s get in line,” she stammered, hurrying toward the stand. “The sooner we-“
And then the smell hit her nose. The smell of dough frying in hot oil. Sizzling. Burning. Flesh burning. Flesh melting. Crumbing into ash.
The girl’s face bulged in horror.
“Tsubasa?”
Tsubasa snapped back to reality. Maria was gazing at her with worry, a hand on her shoulder. “Are you okay?” she asked.
Tsubasa breathed in. She was back at the fairground. The smell of frying dough was, once again, just the smell of frying dough. “I’m fine,” she mumbled, ignoring how fast her heart was still beating.
Maria’s gaze bore into her. Tsubasa felt an overwhelming urge to stare at the ground. This time, though, she forced herself not to look away. I am not letting this ruin today.
“Listen,” she said, “if you want funnel cake, go get funnel cake. I’ll just wander around here and find something to pass the time with.”
“Tsubasa…”
“I’ll be fine.” Tsubasa forced a smile on her face. “Promise.”
Maria pursed her lips. Conflicted feelings played across her face, but in the end, she gave in. “Just call me if you need help,” she said.
“Got it.”
“Actually call me, alright?”
“Alright, alright!” Tsubasa shook her off. “God, you’re stubborn.”
“And you’re not?”
Then, unexpectedly, Maria leaned in and planted a kiss on her cheek. “See you soon,” she whispered.
And with that, she hurried over to the back of the line. Tsubasa stared after her, stunned into silence. Suddenly, she felt hot all the way down her neck. God, you are so unfair.
She rubbed her face to cool down and looked around. Now that she was alone, she was suddenly aware of how crowded the park was. Everywhere she looked, throngs of people were milling about, bumping into each other, mingling, breaking apart. Kids pestering their parents for ice cream. Teenagers shrieking with joy after braving the wildest rides. A swirling mass of human enthusiasm. Just like that day-
Her lifeless body collapsed in a pool of her own blood.
Tsubasa slapped her cheeks in frustration. Stop it. Not helping.
She looked back at Maria. The line was moving slowly; even from a distance, Tsubasa could sense her impatience. No doubt she was anxious to get back to Tsubasa and make sure she was okay. Shame prickled at her cheeks. So much for putting her girlfriend’s mind at ease.
She rubbed her forehead in frustration. It really didn’t make sense. She knew how much Maria cared. And her nightmares were an issue. Why was she so resistant to asking for help?
Stupid sentinel pride. If only I knew how to turn you off.
“Excuse me? Tsubasa-san?”
The voice snapped Tsubasa out of her brooding. It was the voice of a young girl, small and high-pitched. Had a fan recognized her? She’d tried to keep from standing out, but perhaps world-famous idols couldn’t avoid notice that easily.
She exhaled, shook herself off and turned around. She wasn’t in the mood for fan interaction, but trying to run away was more trouble than it was worth. Let’s just get this over with.
“Who is it?”
And then, everything froze.
Tears and blood stained her cheeks.
“Tsubasa-san?”
Tsubasa barely heard her. Blood roared in her ears. The world began to spin.
Her face convulsed and came undone.
“Tsubasa-san? Tsubasa-san!”
Her face.
A scream rose in her throat.
Her face…
…is staring at me again.
An explosion ripped through her chest, and everything went dark.
* * *
“Tsubasa-san! Tsubasa-san, can you hear me?”
Tsubasa groaned. What’s going on?
“Tsubasa-san!”
That voice again. Why did it sound so distressed? Everything was fine. She was having fun at an amusement park. There was no reason to-
And then she remembered.
She sat bolt upright.
Instantly, her stomach yowled in protest. She gasped and doubled over. Bile sloshed around painfully. She squeezed her hands into fists.
“Tsubasa-san! Hey, are you okay?”
Her stomach heaved again. She bit her lip to distract from the pain. Shit. Shit, shit, shit.
Something was wrong. Her brain wasn’t working. Her thoughts were being cut short halfway before finishing. It was like a thick wall had descended in the middle of her mind, preventing access from one end to the other. Was she even here? Was any of this even real?
“Tsubasa… san?”
Again, that voice. Too loud to be imaginary. Too clear to be hallucination.
She looked over.
Brown hair. Violet eyes. A short ponytail on the left side of her head. A blue coat and a red scarf. An unassuming girl who’d easily blend into any crowd. Unless you were specifically looking for her, she wouldn’t stand out at all.
But Tsubasa recognized her.
She’d know that face anywhere.
Her eyes spasmed in terror.
She’d known that face for a very long time now.
Her tongue lolled about like a slug.
“I’m sorry.” The girl kneaded her hands together. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
Tsubasa stared her. It was no good. Her brain refused to accept the situation before her. Every time she tried to reign it back in, it collapsed again. What was this? What was going on? Why was any of this happening? Why…
“Why… are you apologizing?”
She didn’t know how she managed to get the words out. It barely felt like she was talking at all. But the girl had clearly heard her. She opened her mouth, then, confused, closed it again. Suddenly, she seemed just as lost for words as Tsubasa.
A pulse beat in the back of Tsubasa’s head. It didn’t make sense. None of this made sense. Every fiber in her body wanted to reject what her eyes were seeing. But her eyes insisted on the truth over and over again. A girl she let die was sitting beside her. The face from her dreams had found its way into the waking world. And it was staring at her with a mixture of fear, concern, and awe.
Somehow, she found her voice again. “You’re… not a ghost, are you?”
The girl flinched. Instantly, Tsubasa regretted her choice of words. “I’m sorry, that was- I didn’t mean- I should’ve-“
“N-no, it’s fine!” the girl stammered. “It’s not a- I get it!”
“I- oh- okay. Yeah.”
Silence fell. Tsubasa felt her ears burning. She was painfully aware of the girl’s gaze on her, anxiously trying to make sense of her. If only she could descend into the earth and escape that gaze forever.
She forced herself to look around. They were sitting on a bench in a secluded corner. People passed by, but nobody stayed for longer than a few seconds. It was about as private as one could get in a park this busy. Maria was nowhere to be seen; was she still in the funnel cake line? Or had enough time past that she was looking for Tsubasa, desperately calling her name?
Slowly, she clenched and unclenched her fists. When she was first starting out as an idol, she would often get stage fright. Sometimes it was so bad she could barely move. Kanade had to pick her up and princess-carry her to safety more than once. This reminded her of that sensation; the trembling, the queasiness, the paralysis setting in through sheer terror. The only difference was that it was far, far worse.
“Tsubasa-san… are you okay?”
That’s right. There was someone else here. She couldn’t just stay cooped up in her thoughts forever. She had to face her properly.
Go on, look at her.
“I’m… alright,” she lied. “Sorry for scaring you.”
Look at her already.
For a moment, there was silence. Then, the girl spoke again: “I saw you at my grave.”
A shock ran through Tsubasa.
She looked up.
The girl staring back at her was young. Maybe thirteen years old. Her clothes were a little too small on her; pretty soon she’d grow out of them. But her face was creased with an ill-fitting weariness. Such a troubled expression should be worn only by the elderly and soldiers back from war. It had no place on a child.
Tsubasa wet her lips. Once again, shame seeped through her. This was what she was afraid of? Just a scared little girl? And she couldn’t even do her the courtesy of looking her in the eye?
Specks of intestine stained the pavement.
Tsubasa dug her nails into her palms. Don’t look away. Don’t you dare.
“What’s… your name?” she managed to ask.
“Sakura. Sakura Oono.”
“Sakura.” Tsubasa closed her eyes. “That’s a lovely name.”
“Th-thanks.” Sakura glanced away.
Tsubasa frowned. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah.” Sakura shuffled her feet. “It’s just… I never thought I’d get to talk to you. And now you’re, like, saying my name and everything.” She blushed a bit “Am I being weird? I’m being weird, right?”
“N-no, of course not!” Now it was Tsubasa’s turn to feel awkward. When did this turn into a meet-and-greet?
She laced her fingers together. “You say… you saw me at your grave?”
“Yeah.” Sakura idly kicked her feet. “You talked to my mom. That was really nice of you.”
Tsubasa shook her head. “That was just…” Her thoughts trailed off.
“Oh!” Sakura suddenly perked up. “And Kanade was there too!”
“What?!” Tsubasa almost leapt to her feet in shock. “Y-you know Kanade?” she stammered.
“Yeah! She was my afterlife guide! Kind of.” Sakura grinned sheepishly. “Helped me find a path to reincarnation too. Even though I was always telling her to buzz off, she was always so nice to me.”
God dammit, that’s actually her.
“I can’t believe it,” Tsubasa mumbled. She leaned back in her seat, spent. “She’s still watching me.”
A thought occurred to her. Her face burned red. “Did she, um… say anything about me?”
Sakura shuffled nervously. “Well… she said you and Maria should hurry and get together already.”
Tsubasa just about choked on her own spit. “She WHAT?!”
“I-i-it’s just what she said!” Sakura turned red. “I’m just repeating it! That’s all!”
“Goooooood!” Tsubasa covered her face with her hands. “She’s such a… god!” As embarrassed as she was, though, her heart couldn’t help but skip a beat. You were really rooting for us?
Sakura giggled. Tsubasa managed to peek out of her hands. “What?”
“Sorry.” Sakura forced her laughter down. “It’s just… I never pictured you like this.”
Tsubasa bit her lip. It was such an innocuous comment. The girl had no way of knowing the storm of emotions it was brewing in her.
“I guess that’s public relations for you,” she said.
“Maybe.” Sakura sighed in contentment. “I’m glad I got to see it, though.”
She was so nice. So unbelievably nice. There wasn’t a hint of anger or resentment in her voice. She could’ve been any ordinary girl meeting her idol for the first time.
The girl’s eyes screamed to be saved.
But she didn’t save her.
The stones ran red with her blood.
She let her die.
The stench of death filled the air.
So why…
Why… don’t you hate me?
Tsubasa tasted salt. She was biting her lip so hard, she’d drawn blood. She swallowed, felt the acrid taste coat her throat. It was an eerily comforting sensation.
That was it, wasn’t it? The reason why she couldn’t let Maria help. Why she could barely process the situation before her. Why her nightmares were still so vivid after all this time. Deep down, some part of her welcomed the suffering.
Deep down, some part of her felt like she deserved it.
Tsubasa closed her eyes. Maybe this was her curse. For letting Sakura die. For failing her duty as a protector. A constant reminder of all the blood on her hands, never to be washed clean. A fitting punishment for a broken sentinel like her.
Is that really for the best?
Maria’s anxious expression appeared in her mind’s eye. Worried. Caring. Earnest.
That was all the answer she needed.
“Sakura.”
“Tsubasa-san?”
Tsubasa took a deep breath. She looked the girl in the eyes. The face staring back at her wasn’t screaming, wasn’t pleading, wasn’t crumpling and bulging in the throes of death. It was simply watching her, waiting to see what she did next.
“I know this may not mean much,” she began. “I know I can never make things up for you. But…”
She sucked back a sob. “I’m sorry. That I couldn’t save you.”
Sakura gazed at her. Tsubasa managed not to look away. For some reason, the tears she expected didn’t come. Maybe they would come later, once the shock of seeing a dead girl come back to life finally wore off. Or maybe she was simply beyond tears at this point.
Perhaps the silence only lasted a few seconds. Perhaps it lasted an hour. Tsubasa could have gazed at Sakura’s sad expression forever and been unable to pull away. But in the end, Sakura broke the spell with three simple words.
“I forgive you.”
Tsubasa’s heart twisted into knots. It would have been less painful if Sakura told her to go to hell. “Are… you sure?”
“I don’t blame you for anything. Really.” Sakura pulled her knees to her chest. “Even… if I wanted to sometimes.”
“But you were there.” Tsubasa’s hands began to tremble. “You were right in front of me, and I couldn’t… I didn’t…”
She inhaled shakily. “I just wish… I wish I could’ve saved you. All of you.”
Her cheeks suddenly felt damp.
Ah, there they are.
She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. The tears continued to flow. “Sorry,” she mumbled. Breaking down in front of a kid. Way to go, Tsubasa.
“It’s okay.” Sakura shifted closer to her. “We’ve both had it rough, haven’t we?”
Tsubasa nodded. She didn’t dare say another word; if she opened her mouth now, there was no telling how badly she’d fall apart.
“Tsubasa-san.”
Tsubasa looked up.
“A lot’s happened to me since I died,” Sakura said. “I can’t really put into words. But seeing the world from up there… it made me realize how great it is. Being alive.”
She shivered from the cold. “Honestly, I thought my old life sucked a lot of the time. I focused on the bad things too much. But you know what?” She smiled. “Your music helped me see the good things too. I always wanted to tell you that.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.” Sakura blushed a bit. “That’s why I’m glad I saw you today.”
Once again, Tsubasa had no idea what to say. She simply stared at the girl, taking it all in. A curious feeling filled her chest. It was painful, but soothing at the same time. It sunk deep into her nerves and cleared the fog from her head. She wiped her eyes again, hoping her makeup wasn’t too messed up.
“That’s not much to forgive me over,” she managed to say.
“I know.” Sakura leaned back in her seat. “But I forgive you. So, tough.”
Now it was Tsubasa’s turn to smile. “If you say so.”
She looked out into the park. People were still passing by, laughing and loving and living. Maybe sometime in the future, tragedy would strike and they would all go up in flames screaming. For now, though, the day remained cheery as ever.
“So what now?” she asked.
“Now?” Sakura gazed at the horizon. “I’m gonna live, I guess. Make sure I don’t waste this second chance and everything.”
Suddenly, she yelped in surprise. “Crap, that’s right! My parents!”
“Your parents?”
“They told me not to wander off for long!” Sakura pulled her phone out and looked at the screen. Sure enough, her notifications were full to bursting with missed calls. “Fuuuuuuck!” she moaned.
Tsubasa almost burst out laughing. “Well, don’t let them hear you using that language.”
Sakura flushed. “S-sorry!”
“I was joking,” Tsubasa chuckled. She was shocked how light she felt. How much was I weighing myself down before?
Sakura was already leaping to her feet. “I gotta go,” she said breathlessly. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine.” Tsubasa rubbed the back of her neck. “Tell you what, do you have a pen and paper?”
“I- sure.”
Sakura handed them over. Quickly, Tsubasa scrawled her phone number on the paper. “Here,” she said, handing them back. “Just in case you ever want to talk more.”
Sakura’s face lit up. “You mean it?”
“Of course.” Tsubasa returned her smile. “It’s the least I can do, right?”
Sakura grinned. “Thank you!”
“Now go. You’ll give them a heart attack if you keep them waiting any longer.”
“I know!” Sakura pocketed her things and started to hurry off. Before she got far, though, she paused and turned back. “Tsubasa-san?”
“Yes?”
Silhouetted by the midday sun, the girl waved goodbye. “You live a good life too!”
And with that, she hurried off, sliding between people until she vanished into the crowd.
Tsubasa watched her go. Slowly, she let out a breath she didn’t even realize she was holding. She rubbed an arm over her eyes, hoping the tears had stopped falling.
It still didn’t feel real. Had she really just talked to the girl she let die? Had that girl really forgiven her? For once in her life, was the universe giving her permission to breathe? Surely this couldn’t last. Surely there was another disaster right around the corner and everything was about to fall apart.
Right before her eyes, the girl died.
Tsubasa looked up into the sky. She pictured Sakura’s face. Not the face of her dying moments, but the face of the girl she’d just shared a conversation with. Excited. Bashful. Scared. Concerned.
Right before her eyes… the girl was alive again.
She smiled. You’re right. Life is pretty wonderful.
At that moment, a familiar voice rang through the air: “Tsubasa!”
She looked down.
And there was Maria, carrying a massive tangle of fried dough and powdered sugar in each hand, panting heavily like she’d been running for a while.
“There you are!” she gasped. “Don’t just vanish on me like that!”
Tsubasa stared at her. Maria’s hair was matted with sweat, her face flushed from exertion. How long had she been looking for her? How worried had she been when she couldn’t find the person she loved? How scared had Tsubasa made her over and over again, always keeping her at a distance, too scared to let her in?
“Tsubasa?” Maria looked at her, concerned. “Are you- mmph!”
And suddenly Tsubasa was hugging her, Tsubasa was kissing her, Tsubasa was holding her tighter than she’d ever held anyone before. Maria stumbled back in shock, almost dropping the funnel cake. But Tsubasa held her upright with all the strength left in her arms. She nestled into her lover’s warmth and shared her own in turn. For a brief, shining moment, the world fell away; there was only the two women, the heat they shared, and the promise that lay unspoken between their lips.
When they finally broke apart, Maria was beet red. “I-I-I-I-I…” she stammered, but the words wouldn’t come.
Tsubasa smiled. “Was that too much?”
“N-No, of course not!” Maria frantically shook her head to clear it. “Just, uh, maybe a warning next time!”
“Sorry.” Tsubasa looked into her eyes “I just… wanted to say thank you.”
Maria blinked. “Thank you?”
“Yeah. I think… I really needed this.”
She could feel Maria’s gaze on her. She took a shaky breath and continued. “You’re so good at reaching out to me. And I want to get better at doing the same. Does that… make sense?”
For a moment, Maria simply looked at her. Then, she smiled. “I love you.”
She leaned in and returned Tsubasa’s kiss. Tsubasa froze for a moment, then relaxed. She surrendered to the sweetness of her lips, the warmth of her embrace. It was the easiest thing she had done all day.
I love you too.
Her trauma wouldn’t vanish overnight. That much she knew for certain. It would be a long, painful journey to figure out how to process this pain. But she’d get there. Slowly. Bit by bit. Until she could hold her life in her hands without fear of shattering it.
Until she could believe she deserved a second chance too.
“So,” she said when they pulled apart, “how’s the funnel cake?”
“Haven’t tried it yet.” Maria passed one to her. “They’ve gone cold, but they should still be good.”
Tsubasa winced; Maria must have been looking for a while. “Sorry.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll chew you out later.” Maria raised her funnel cake. “Shall we?”
Tsubasa smiled. “Let’s.”
They clinked their desserts together like wine glasses and bit down in harmony.
About an angel that gave up her place in heaven, all for a lonely maiden she fell for like crazy.
A Himitsu series retelling but it’s tsubamari! This AU existed ever since I released a solo illustration in January, but I wanted to expand onto this world a bit. I genuinely think Black Vow’s story is heavily underrated, even with the recognition it’s still getting. And as a self-declared tbmr artist, who am I to turn down an idea for a cute comic?
This story is mostly based on the novel adaptation, but I’m tossing in lots of my original ideas. It’s serialized in parts and is still ongoing! Separate parts probably won’t be tagged, and will be released one by one. I gave myself the permission to make some silly titles -v-
I normally don’t make Christmas content, because I’m Christian but don’t want to make people see content they may not be into, but Vow gang is explicitly Catholic, so now or never!
Sharing a wafer is mainly Polish tradition, though it’s also cultivated in other countries. Basically, you get yourself a special flatbread and pray for other people as you exchange crumbs! At least that’s how it looks in my house.
