CW: talk of food, mention of disordered eating
I’m not doing so good. My tummy is sore 😢
I’ve been really stressed lately and I kind of stopped eating over the last couple days. Yesterday I had two granola bars and some potato chips. Today I had a granola bar, some instant oatmeal, and then I finally managed to eat some dumplings for dinner. I was kind of worried that I was backsliding into disordered eating again because I do that very occasionally, like maybe once or twice a year. It’s not as serious as it once was when I was a teenager, that’s for sure, but sometimes it happens and I don’t really have anyone to talk to about it in real life.
After dinner today I found my tummy was gurgling noticeably. I thought it was just gas, like my bowels finally working through stuff even though I hadn’t really eaten much. Then I had a cigarette and noticed that oh boy, I wasn’t feeling too well. My tummy started feeling heavy and bloated and I noticed that it was really rounding out, just bloating and swelling up. I got that urgent feeling in my tummy, that intense sense of discomfort that usually signals impending diarrhoea… and I was right.
Got back inside and did a very quick shuffle to the toilet. I had a runny tummy that just poured out of me as I sat there miserably, holding my sore belly as it cramped and rumbled and was sick. It’s happened before if I don’t eat enough - first I feel slightly constipated because I haven’t eaten enough so I don’t really need to go that much, then my tummy protests and just clears everything out.
I’m lying in bed now but my tummy isn’t feeling well still. The right lower side is still feeling heavy and sore, like it’s churning up something next and making trouble. I just want a tummy rub…
