Umang Mumbai Police Awards
Hard on the heels of the Filmfare Awards came the Umang Mumbai Police Awards this week, about which I have mixed feelings.
Deepika Padukone, completely unconflicted love of the sparkly overcoat with high collar which looks be lined to match the suit underneath, which is royal blue. I’m easy to please.
Also loving the necklace and movement of the coat. Sparkle on.
Not loving Sonam Kapoor’s look here, the fit is awkward, as is the color combination and the entire bodice region.
Black and red anarkali on Katrina Kaif, however, yes, love, murderdress, sparkly murderdress, murder in Bollywood style, I want it.
This is an oddly school-girlish look on Alia Bhatt, in a weird Desi Schoolgirl Barbie sparkly kind of way. Nope.
Kiara Advani, a very pretty if rather boring lehenga (skirt), but I like the embellishment of the dupatta holding it across her shoulders in this very relaxed way.
Ileana D’Cruz, I’d have to see the skirtage from another angle to comment definitively--this draping could be awkward and weird, or could be graceful and stunning. The capy nonsense over the bodice would be interesting in another pattern--I like that they’ve patterned the edge with the embellishment, I’m just not into the specific look of the embellishment itself. The black and gold is a good color combination for her, though.
Absolutely loving the bird motif of Shamita Shetty’s neckline here, although less than excited about the visible support garments underneath (which may be part of a dress rather than a bra, but I’m still not a fan). Gold birds on blue, however, gorgeous, love it.
Urvashi Rautela, off the shoulder sleeves are fine. Off the shoulder sleeves at the same height as your bust, not fine. This is giving you a weird horizontal line across the boobage effect, and it is not your friend. Also, that much skin with the neck, shoulders, and décolletage all exposed, PLEASE put some sparkly in there!
This is a sad color and a sad fit on Nargis Fakhry, and she knows it. I’m sorry, the fabric is lovely, but that color is NOBODY’s friend; if it looks like hospital curtains, don’t wear it.
At the center is Maharahstra Chief Minister Devendra Fadnavis, whom I believe is representing the Mumbai police force, and his wife, whose blue suit is absolutely GORGEOUS and I love it.
Chief Minister’s daughter, I’m sorry for including this awkward picture of you, but I really wanted to show this closeup of your mom’s bodice, because it’s so damn pretty.
There were musical numbers as well, and some of that was just bizarre, even for Bollywood (don’t get huffy, I love the total weirdness of Bollywood musical interludes, but this is beyond weird into “shit, did I forget my meds this morning?)
Look, I know asking WTF is pretty pointless in a Bollywood dance number, and I can let the sequined belts on the pants go for that reason, but holy shit. The spandex. The safety-orange spandex, which I assume was chosen in some sort of roadworker or traffic cop reference because they also have reflective tape wrapped around the dance staves, but, people, safety-orange and sequined spandex. Were I required to wear that, I would PRAY to be hit by a truck.
The ladies’ version includes gold go-go boots, which appear to be integrated into the spandex leggings, and holy shit, ladies, I am so sorry you had to dance in that under stage lights because that must have been hot and sweaty as hell.
LED trilbies and popped collars, hipster bros! You are outclassed.
Jacqueline Fernandez: Manish Paul, why the hell are you chewing on my damn sari, you freak?
