#uncle jaskier

[0dde11eth]

[0dde11eth]

Jaskier: You know i consider myself pretty laid back but you threaten ciri again and you'll see how fast i lean forward

[0dde11eth]

I don't really like the sight of blood either. It's like "what even is that stuff"

[winters-mistress]

Fever and Firelight

"How is she?" Yennefer asks, pulling over the rock that encloses the four of them in the large cave just east of the pontar river. Her basket is full of wild vegetables and fruits, while Jaskier pulls the carcass of the large boar she had taken down with her magic. The poor bard had lost his breakfast when Yennefer had gutted it, so he was stuck dragging it behind them, two thick ropes binding the hooves in each hand.

Geralt glances up at them both from his position, laying in the makeshift bed that Yennefer's magic had conjured a couple days before. He glances back down at the girl who lays on top of him, adjusting his hand on her back.

"No change, still wheezing." He replies, watching as Jaskier finally lay the body down on the floor, wheezing just as much as Ciri was, hunching over and clutching his knees. His eyes flash to the girl still sleeping on top of her protector, pushing back against the cave wall to hold his weight.

"Alright, big man, switch." Jaskier lollops over. "The bitchy witch won't get her hands dirty, and I am sure to hurl once again if I should ever see that boor beasts insides again." He finishes, opening his arms to take the girl from the witcher.

"Clean up, first. She's hardly likely to improve breathing in your sweat and boar blood." Geralt grunts, his arm wrapping tight around her back.

"Who's a clucky mother hen, then?" Jaskier laughs, poking Geralt's nose. The witcher growls at him, and Jaskier chuckles, stripping off his red leather coat.

Yennefer is silent as she starts separating the vegetables from the fruit. Her heart hurts, and she can not help her pain when she watches Geralt treat the girl with such kindness and gentleness. Big hands capable of such violence and pain gently running across blonde curls, holding onto her little body with such care and tenderness that Yennefer proposes that anybody who speaks ill of this witcher may be struck dead. This man is so gentle, nurturing, and protective, and she hates herself for hurting him and hurting the thing he cherishes most above all else.

Geralt and Jaskier swap roles as the Queen of Cintra's bed, with the witcher taking a moment to stretch his muscles, before going over to the body and kneeling over it. One of his daggers skins the beast, while the other begins to cut out all the muscle he can find. The bones have their uses, for broth and a couple of his own ilixr recipes. The offel and giblets make Jaskier nauseous, but he's sure they can make use of them in some way. Even sell them to a butcher if they get desperate. Vesemir always told he and his brothers to never waste a kill.

He thinks he should spend a few hours making the boar skin into a blanket for Jaskiers pony that he had named Oatmeal, for its mane was the colour of gruel. Ciri had laughed at him when he said it, her own Astoria even snuffling in disgust as she headbutted the horse in greeting.

He hopes she will be as amused by the name as she had been that day whenever she would break this impressive and terrible fever. Be the same fiesty and firey and fierce little warrior sorceress Queen he had always known her to be. And the logical part of his brain says she will, but the frantic part worries that the fever will be tok great and reduce her to a drooling invalid who would be taken out in the night and that be that.

"Calm down, Papa wolf." Jaskiers voice calls out. "Keep that face up and we won't need the magic floaty candles, you'll burst into flame."

He grumbles at the purple bard, who grins at him. Yennefer comes closer, and Geralt tenses as he had since he had put all the pieces together about Yennefer's deception and betrayal.

"Here-" she lays a handful of leaves next to his knee. "found these for her. Chamomile, I believe. With a few sprigs of cinnamon. Should help her."

Geralt takes them in his hand, letting out a quiet hum in her direction as the great and mighty sorceress begins to cop the tops off carrots and slice their stringy skins to get to the bright orange within.

He looks at her, and she looks at him.

"Oh, no, you fucking don't. You do not get me holding the baby while you make moon eyes at each other. You want to do a jot of bedsport? Go outside, you couple of animals." Jaskier throws his sweaty coat at the two of them, laughing as Geralt growls at him once more.

[0dde11eth]

You know that thing where your parents talk about ther past and your like "what? When did this happen? What do you mean you used to drugs?" I think it would be funny if this happened but with ciri and jaskier.

Like she just thinks he's a silly slightly sluty bard but once they get closer every time he opens his mouth curi is left shocked.

"what do you mean you had sex with a priestess."

"the fuck do you mean you helped elves escape slavery"

"when did yennefer become your wife!?"

It would be epic.

Oh my word

Jaskier is the youngest of all the adults in ciris life

But he's had the craziest one

He keeps them more kid friendly but when she's an adult he spills all the details!

"Did I ever tell you about the time...." is her favorite thing to hear because she knows it's going to be an epic tale with an ending she couldn't anticipate

[0dde11eth]

Life is alot like chess. In the game of chess you never let your opponent see your pieces

[apinchofm]

are there any fics in which jaskier has to babysit a magical baby ciri giving geralt and yennifer the night off?? because i feel like we all deserve that.

[makerkenzie]

Oh, yes, I look forward to Season 2!

Sometimes, a family is:

 A gruff mutant mercenary, 

his horse, 

his girlfriend the cynical loose-cannon mage, 

his foster brother the goofball bard, 

and their adopted daughter the brave orphaned princess with untold magical powers. 

Awesomely campy and fucking LIT!