Performing oral sex on someone is famously known in pop culture with slangs like 'going down', 'eating out', 'giving head' to or on someone. Regardless of whether you want to try something new with your significant other, or are just curious about how to be safe in the best possible way, you've come to the right place. Here's an ultimate guide for you on how to make 'going down' on someone exciting, safe, and hygienic at the same time.
While there is a tonne of misinformation, stigma, and shame around sex and the upkeep of sexual health, and there are definitely not enough reliable resources for young folks that are both accurate and sex-positive at the same time, it's important to be informed before you make any important decisions in these matters.
But before we get started, you should know that one should never feel pressured into having sex, and more importantly, if you do feel like having sex, the best way to prep is to have all the knowledge that you can get to make an informed decision about your body. It's important to have healthy communication with your partner(s) in order to have pleasurable and consensual sex.
So, what exactly is oral sex exactly?
The medical textbook definition of oral sex is defined by oral stimulation of the genitals. However, that seems to be a limiting definition of oral sex which definitely involves a lot more. To begin with, historically oral sex dates back to ancient Egypt—through the myth of Egyptian Gods Osiris and Isis. Back in the day, when Osiris had died, Isis put him back together and brought him back to life by sucking on his penis. The act was seen as a gift that could sustain life. In fact, in literature, the act is considered to be so subliminal, it has been compared to death as well.
Broadly speaking, oral sex is the act of orally stimulating your partner's genitals with one's mouth, tongue, and lips. Although there is a tonne of stigma around oral sex, it is still of the most intimate of sexual acts out there.
Moreover, studies suggest that young people usually do not define oral sex as sex. For a lot of people, it's an act that comes before the real deal or penetrative sex. On the contrary, oral sex is most definitely sex—and for some people, the only way they have pleasure themselves with their partner. On the other hand, it's also the act that involves the rest of the body. For some engaging in oral sex means involving all sensations that exist out there and bringing them together in harmony which leads to an orgasm.
In fact, oral sex is one of the preferred acts to reach an orgasm for the human body.
It's imperative that we unlearn these stigmas so we can begin to have healthy conversations around oral sex.
Why Do We Need Oral Sex?
For a lot of people, oral sex can be a great starting point or foreplay (a sexual activity that precedes intercourse) that ushers in the act of penetrative sex. It facilitates and helps ease out both partners. For others, it may just be the endgame wherein they prefer oral sex to any other sexual activity and just engage solely in that. For some others, it could be perceived as an act in isolation that could lead to orgasams. Regardless of what your definition of oral sex is, we want you to know all these definitions are healthy.
How To Talk About Oral Sex With Your Partner
Before you have oral sex, you ideally would want to make sure that your partner also feels as enthusiastic as you do about trying something new. Have a conversation about mutual pleasure and if you both want to go down on each other. If you're feeling anxious, be honest and talk about how both of you can create a safe environment to explore this new sensation.
It's important to verbalise consent but also read both verbal and nonverbal cues for ongoing consent. To make things better, practice aftercare with your partner and talk about how it felt. This creates an open dialogue and will help create a safe space that encourages a healthy relationship.
How To Have Oral Sex Safely
Whether you’re engaging in fellatio (oral stimulation of a man's penis), cunnilingus (stimulation of the female genitals using the tongue or lips), or analingus (the act of orally pleasuring the anus)—there are a few things to keep that need to be kept in mind about exactly how to have oral sex safely.
From infections to STIs, engaging in oral sex does put you at risk of contracting either if you don't engage in the act safely maintaining proper hygiene. The long-standing myth that oral sex doesn’t spread STIs is harmful to our collective sexual health.
There are plenty of STIs that can be contracted from oral-genital or skin-to-skin contact, these include the likes of chlamydia, gonorrhoea, syphilis, herpes simplex virus, HPV, and HIV.
So, what safety options do you have?
Chances of getting an STI can be dramatically reduced if you engage in the act in a safe and hygienic manner. For example:
1. For fellatio, one can use a latex or polyurethane condom on the penis before you give your partner head.
2. For cunnilingus or analingus, the use of a dental dam becomes super important. For the uninitiated, a dental dam is rectangular-latex protection that is placed over the vulva or anus before sex.
3. It's always a great idea to get tested for STIs every three months especially when you're sexually active.
4. Make sure to pee before and after you engage in the act, this also makes sure that you're not exposing your genitals to germs. While it may seem awkward to visit the washroom before and after, it is an extremely helpful practice that according to studies lowers the risk of contracting vaginal infections.
5. Use intimate hygiene products before and after to make sure you don't get any infection. Use the Hi Life intimate hygiene spray(vaginal spray) before and after to make sure that you're not exposing yourself to any harmful germs. With a unique Japanese formula, our 100% alcohol-free intimate hygiene spray(vaginal spray) keeps your intimate area clean and infection-free.
Odours And Fluids
People sometimes get anxious about dipping their toes in oral sex simply because they are apprehensive about what their partners would taste like down there. Some people even avoid the act altogether because of this apprehension. Meanwhile, some people also experience insecurity of not letting other people perform oral sex on them because they believe that they might taste funny down there.
But it's important to remember that as long as you don't have a diagnosed infection down there, what you taste down there is exactly how it's supposed to taste like. Again, to make sure you don't have infections and that you taste like yourself, (considering the fact that engaging in the act does mean exposure to germs), just use the Hi Life intimate hygiene products (vaginal spray)before and after. With its convenient and handy design, firstly it makes sure that you don't smell or taste funny down there. Secondly, intimate hygiene products are easy to use and safeguards your sexual health in the best possible manner.