@pipesflowforeverandever made a series of posts about her Vampire!Gin and I wanted to write it so bad.
The Vampire!Gin AU is directly connected to @aceofintuition ‘s Werecat AU. Which is why Snowy, Joy, and Ana appear in it
It was late at night and I was walking home. My club had gotten out later than I’d anticipated, so I was walking home in the dark. Technically, I could have taken a bus all the way home, but it was a nice night so I thought I’d just walk home from the train station. I needed the exercise anyway. My earbuds were in and I was quietly singing along to the song that had come on. It was a peppy one that made me pick up my pace. I was cutting through the forest preserve since I didn’t get many chances to go through it. It was a beautiful night. The moon was shining amongst a series of glittering stars in the dark velvet sky, a warm wind blowing through the trees. I exhaled slowly, allowing myself a smile. Nature really could be so amazing sometimes.
Suddenly, a flash of white caught my eye and my breath caught in my throat. A little white bat was flying toward me. I immediately stopped in my tracks, taking my earbuds out and watching as the teeny bat flew down. I’d never seen a bat in real life before. They just didn’t live in my area. Instinctively, I cupped my hands so that the little bat could settle in them. It landed in my hands and I let out a small squeak. It was so small, its fur so soft.
“Hey there, little guy,” I whispered, bringing my cupped hands up to my face. I could have sworn it was smiling at me as it made cute little squeaking noises.
“Aren’t you just the cutest little thing?” I cooed, shifting the bat to one hand and tapping its little nose with one outstretched finger. It almost seemed to giggle, wiggling a bit and making happy sounds. I let out a small squeal, rubbing it against my face. I knew it was probably dangerous to be fondling a bat like this, but it was so cute!
“You’re so cute.” I kept rubbing it against my cheek. The bat made more happy noises, or at least noises I hoped were happy. Then it flapped its wings and flew out of my hands. For a moment, I thought it was going to fly away. Then it started pressing little kisses to my cheeks.
“Hey!” I giggled. “What are you doing?” The bat didn’t pause, continuing to plant little kisses all over my face. It was an interesting feeling, being kissed by a bat. It honestly tickled a little bit. I giggled louder, scrunching my nose up and closing my eyes. After a minute or so, though, the kisses changed. They no longer felt like bat kisses, but more like the kisses a human would give. And I could have sworn someone was holding my face.
When I opened my eyes, the bat was gone. But there was someone who was still kissing all over my face. An older man, maybe 50 at the youngest, wearing a red and white suit and a top hat of all things. His skin was pale, almost unhealthily so, and he had rather vibrant orange hair. He was kissing all over my face in the way a grandparent would kiss their grandchild. He did look kind of like a grandpa with his circular glasses and wrinkles. I let out a small squeak, jerking away. The man looked rather disappointed.
“W-Who are you?!” My voice went up an octave.
“Ah! How rude of me! I didn’t introduce myself!” The man exclaimed. “My name is Joey Drew! Although, my friends tend to call me Gingersnap. Gingie seems to have stuck the most, though.”
“How- Where did the bat go? Are you the bat?”
“I am.” He nodded, smiling brightly. He had a nice smile. A kind smile. He looked like a kindly grandpa. No! I couldn’t be sucked in by his charm! This was a strange man!
“How were you the bat?” I demanded. “People can’t just turn into bats.”
“Yes, that is true,” Gingie replied with a mischevious sparkle in his eye. “But I am no ordinary person.” I stared blankly at him. He stared expectantly back at me.
“I don’t know what that means.” I finally said.
“I’m a vampire!” He smiled again. Now that I looked closer, I could definitely see what were probably his fangs. Quickly, my fear and apprehension turned to interest.
“You’re...a vampire?” My voice was quiet, almost reverent. I’d always been such a fantasy nerd, and I thought vampires were just the coolest thing. Although, this guy didn’t really seem like the kind of person I pictured when I thought of a vampire.
“I didn’t know vampires were even real,” I whispered, then my eyes widened and I stumbled back. “Wait, are you going to try and suck my blood?! Please don’t kill me!”
“Of course not!” Gingie looked rather offended at the idea. “I only drink from animals and willing humans! And never enough to kill anyone!” I stayed where I was, still nervous. He may have seemed sweet, but he was a vampire. Vampires were dangerous. At least, all the vampires I’d read about were dangerous. Gingie’s expression softened and he took a step closer.
“My dear girl, I truly don’t want to hurt you.” He smiled gently. I was about to reply, but then my stomach growled loudly. I closed my eyes, making a small whimpering sound. Seriously?! I was totally messing up my chances of this vampire thinking I was cool. He probably thought I was a dork. When I opened my eyes, he had a disapproving look on his face.
“Have you not eaten yet?” He demanded, arms crossed.
“Um...No?” I smiled sheepishly. “I was, uh, headed home to eat.”
“My dear, it is almost 8 at night!” He huffed. “This cannot stand!” He grabbed my arm and started to tug me in a direction that was not toward my house.
“Where are we going?” I asked, feeling my heart rate beginning to speed up in panic. Was I being kidnapped? Was he going to eat me?! He’d said he wouldn’t, but vampires were dangerous!
“A friend of mine lives close by,” Gingie said brightly. “I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if we dropped by for dinner!”
“It’s okay, I can just get food at my house.” I tried to pull away. “I don’t want to be a nuisance.”
“Nonsense!” Gingie scoffed. “It’s no trouble! He’ll be happy to see us, I’m sure!”
I was dragged to a nice little house in the suburbs, one that looked a little bit like my own. Gingie waltzed up to the front door and knocked, a huge smile on his face. It was opened by a beautiful woman with a child at her side. She had dark skin and brown hair, which the girl beside her shared. One difference, though, was that the little girl had blue eyes.
“Grandpa Gingie!” The little girl exclaimed, throwing herself at Gingie.
“Hello, my little jellybean!” Gingie scooped her up in his arms, spinning her around. The dark skinned woman smiled softly, noticing me after a moment.
“Hello.” She said. Her expression changed to one of slight resignation and amusement. I wondered if this was the first time Gingie had brought someone to her house.
“Hi.” I waved awkwardly. “I-I’m sorry. I hope I’m not intruding.”
“Don’t worry. You don’t have anything to apologize for.” She assured me. “He probably dragged you over here, didn’t he?” She glanced at Gingie, who had transitioned into holding the little girl in his arms, asking her how her day had been.
“He, uh, he did.”
“Well, if you’re here, you might as well come in.” The woman stood aside, allowing me to enter. I walked in behind Gingie, more than a little nervous. I really didn’t want to be a nuisance to these people. I didn’t even know them! I didn’t even really know Gingie!
“Who was at the door?” A man’s voice came from the kitchen area.
“Just Gingie.” The woman replied. “He brought a friend.”
“Oh for crying out-” A man stormed out of the kitchen. Like the girl and the woman, he had dark skin. His eyes were blue like the girl’s, and his hair was strikingly silver, even though he didn’t look all that old. He was very tall and very angry looking and I squeaked and shrank back a bit. Thankfully, though, the man’s anger didn’t seem to be directed at me. He marched up to Gingie, hands on his hips. Gingie quickly handed the little girl off to her mother.
“You’ve gotta stop picking up these kids! One of these days, someone’s going to call the cops on you for basically kidnapping them!” The man said, sounding rather like a scolding parent. He was a parent, from what I could tell. I couldn’t help but giggle a little at this.
“I did not kidnap her!” Gingie frowned. “She hadn’t eaten and I said she could get some food here, that’s all.” The man sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Do you even know her name?” He asked.
“Of course!” Gingie replied. “It’s...” He trailed off, slowly realizing he’d never asked what my name was.
“My apologies, but I don’t believe I ever asked your name.” He smiled sheepishly toward me.
“It’s Fiona.” I tried to stifle a laugh, but it slipped out anyway.
“Well, it’s lovely to properly meet you, Miss Fiona.” Gingie took my hand, shaking it enthusiastically. “This is my friend, Snowy!”
“We’re both named Joey Drew, so we use nicknames to distinguish ourselves,” Snowy explained, still watching Gingie with weary resignation. “Sorry he basically kidnapped you.”
“No, it’s okay,” I waved my hands in an attempt to deny the apology. “I don’t mind. I’m sorry for intruding.”
“Like I said before, you don’t have anything to apologize for.” The woman said. “Gingie was the one who dragged you over here.”
“This is the lovely Ana!” Gingie gestured to her excitedly. “She and Snowy are married.”
“I’m Joy!” The little girl proclaimed proudly.
“It’s nice to meet you all.” I managed a smile.
“It’s nice to meet you too,” Ana said. I felt a bit better about being here since she didn’t seem all that bothered by my presence. Clearly, Gingie had done this before.
“This is like Francine all over again,” Snowy muttered, sighing heavily. “Do you need to tell your folks where you are, kid?”
“Oh! Yeah!” I fumbled out my phone. “They’ll probably get worried if I’m not home before 10.” I typed out a message and sent it to my parents. While I did this, Ana, Joy, and Snowy started setting the table and getting the food out. Gingie stood by me, rocking on his heels and humming.
“Are you sure this is alright?” I asked quietly as I put my phone away.
“Oh, it’s fine.” Gingie waved a hand. “Snowy will make a big deal about it, but he doesn’t mind.”
So, I ended up having dinner with Gingie and Snowy’s family. Joy insisted I sit beside her so that she could ask me questions. She was especially cute, so I didn’t mind. I’d never really been sure how to interact with small children, but I was going to do my best.
“You have really pretty hair.” She said. “Are you magic like Grandpa Gingie?” I’d gotten my hair dyed purple recently and it always seemed to delight small children.
“Uh, no, I’m not.” I smiled apologetically. “I’m just a regular human.” Joy nodded solemnly, one hand on her chin.
“That’s okay.” She finally said, putting a hand on my arm. “Not everyone can be magic.” I tried very hard to keep a straight face.
While we ate, I told them some basic details about myself. Where I was going to school, what I liked, a little about my family. Snowy kept looking pointedly at Gingie, especially when I mentioned that I only lived about 20 minutes away. Once dinner was over, I got up to leave when Gingie caught my arm.
“I apologize for being forceful.” He said. “But I would very much like to meet with you again. Your work sounds wonderful!
“Oh, um, okay?” I smiled nervously. “Do have...a cell phone or something?”
“I just got one!” His face lit up. We exchanged numbers and I was sent on my way. Honestly, it had been a pretty weird night.
Now I'm thinking about which of the Joey's would be which vampire in What We Do In The Shadows. I think Gingie is clearly Viago. Maybe Snowy would be Vladislav? I can imagine Ana as Pauline, but they'd obviously have a better relationship. I'm tempted to cast Hyde as Deacon, but I feel like Petyr would be a better fit. Maybe Magenta would be Deacon. And then I'm blanking on who would be Nick
I talked it over with Ace n Star and first off: Gingie is def Viago. Maybe also Nandor (from the TV series). I believe @aceofintuition said that if Snowy and Ana had to be vampires, they’d be married vamps a la Laszlo and Nadja (also from the TV series). Hyde gave us some trouble.... @startistdoodles said (with the minimal rundown I gave on the characters afafds) that he’s like a mix of Petyr and Nick.
@halfusek I’m not sure if you know anything about this franchise but trust me: Magenta is Deacon. Just trust me.
I am all in favor of Linda playing with her batpa. I'm sure she's very gentle
Cue a shot of Linda flinging him around by the wing while Henry keeps running side to side trying to gently grab his batdad and get him out of her hands.
Tis the price of being a grandpa, and his expression is one of acceptance.
