#vanilla partner

[hairywire]

from Vanilla Partner by Torbjørn Rødland

[samaharris]

Torbjørn you're such a lad

[submissivefeminist]

I would be happy to start a discussion. I have a vanilla wife and I am new to discovering my inner kink. We are great together but I have a hard time convincing her that getting out the ropes and toys is a good idea... any suggestions? Also, what is the best way to learn how to tie so that when the opportunity arises you are not fumbling around and blowing the mood?

Well, thank you.

To start, I get this question a lot and I'm awkward at answering it, but here's my take on the vanilla-partner situation: Most vanilla people can be swayed into some sort of light kink, be it spanking or handcuffs, what have you. In my opinion, women are more open to toys and kink than men, so you might have an advantage, there.

Honestly, my advise usually consists of telling people to talk to their partners, and that is definitely what I'll tell you here, too. Have a conversation and see if you can establish some grounds to play with, limits, boundaries, and anything she wants to ask, etc. 

My advice to you would be to maybe buy a nice toy that will really get her going. Invest a little in something that is going to get her cum she hard, she'll want more and more. That might sneak her into being more open.

When it comes to bondage, I'm no expert. I'd say look on Youtube for free tutorials or check out this book. Try as much as you can on yourself, but expect a learning curve with rope work. Just be patient and urge her to be patient as you learn--it will get easier.

Best of luck to you!

xx SF