I am both happy and sad to announce that our Vikings Big Bang '22 Event is now officially over!
Organzing and keeping track of our participants has been a lot of fun and I'm glad to also have been able to get to know new and talented people in the fandom, as well as give you the platform to reach out more easily to each other. You have all been wonderful to work with and the result are so many brilliant stories accompanied with beautiful art!
I don't believe this will be the last Event and to optimize the next possible Big Bang or even a Reverse Bang, we send out a Survey to our participants so they can share their insights on what they'd like to have changed or think needs adjusting to make it a little easier, but not kill the light pressure needed to feel the thrill 😉 my fellow procrastinators, you know the drill 😆
The past six months- yeah, that's how long we've been at it, believe it or not- have been lovely with you all! Be it readers sharing the collaborative works or both artists and authors supporting and working with each other. You all can be very proud of yourself for making this Event so awesome and give our little fandom the feeling of a community!
Stay tuned for more information on following Events! This blog will be used for possible Big Bangs or Reverse Bangs in the future.
A story by me @northernxstories for @vikingsbigbang2022.
Thank you to the two fantastic artists who volunteered to make amazing art for my story based on a very short synopsis namely @ivarthebadbitch and @vikingstrash.
Check it out now on A03 [click here]
Please let me express my sincere appreciation for
@vikingstrash
and
@serasvictoria
for organizing this event.
Gif above is by @ivarthebadbitch and cute little banner below by @vikingstrash.
I was honored to collaborate as an artist with the lovely @mrsalwayswrite on her work "The Predator", for @vikingsbigbang2022 💙
A rather eclectic mix of songs have been picked out and assembled into a playlist. Full track list is typed down below here, along with a line from each song which resonated loosely with the plot.
{track 1 - the boy with the thorn in his side - the smiths
"behind the hatred there lies a murderous desire for love"
track 2 - comatose - skillet
"i'm asleep and all i dream of is waking you"
track 3 - i can't handle change - roar
"i get tired and i get sick and i lose the strength to leave"
track 4 - all these things that i have done - the killers
"i wanna stand up, i wanna let go ,you know, you know, no you don't, you don't"
track 5 - all the pretty girls - kaleo
"it's only making me feel smaller, all the hidden love beneath"
track 6 - maria - blondie
"you've gotta see her, go insane and out of your mind"
track 7 - into the unknown - panic! at the disco
"i follow you into the unknown"
track 8 - natural - imagine dragons
"let me see the light between the dark trees shadowing"
track 9 - supermassive black hole - muse
"i thought i was a fool for no-one, but baby i'm a fool for you"
track 10 - pain - three days grace
"anger and agony are better than misery, trust me i've got a plan"
track 11 - ballroom blitz - sweet
"and the girl in the corner said boy i want to warn you"
track 12 - song 2 - blur
"it wasn't easy, but nothing is"
track 13 - legend - the score
"blood, sweat, i'll bleed 'til all my scars bleed golden"
track 14 - feeling good - michael buble
"it's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me, and i', feeling good"
track 15 - do i wanna know - arctic monkeys
"i don't know if you feel the same as i do, but we could be together if you want"
track 16 - tear in my heart - twenty one pilots
"my heart is my armour, she's the tear in my heart"
track 17 - i am here - p!nk
"i open up my heart, you can love me or not"
track 18 - she sells sanctuary - the cult
"the fire in your eyes, keeps me alive"
track 19 - gimme all your lovin' - zz top
"gimme all your lovin', all your hugs and kisses too"
track 20 - you get what you give - new radicals
"you'll be okay, follow your heart, you're in harms way, i'm right behind"
track 21 - (everything i do) i do for you - bryan adams
"i would fight for you, i lie for you, walk the wire for you, i'd die for you"}
A story by me @northernxstories for @vikingsbigbang2022.
Thank you to the two fantastic artists who volunteered to make amazing art for my story based on a very short synopsis namely @ivarthebadbitch and @vikingstrash.
A story by me @northernxstories for @vikingsbigbang2022.
Thank you to the two fantastic artists who volunteered to make amazing art for my story based on a very short synopsis namely @ivarthebadbitch and @vikingstrash.
Check it out now on A03 [click here]
Please let me express my sincere appreciation for @vikingstrash and @serasvictoria for organizing this event.
A/N: As warned previously, this isn’t my best work but I didn’t quite have the writing gods shining down on me, but I tried! I liked taking part of this @vikingsbigbang2022 (this was my first event), even if it did get the better of me sometimes! I want to thank those who set this challenge up and want to say that all the writers and artists who took part are extremely talented and to be apart of all these very talented people, is an honour. (especially as mine sucks!)
As this is my final Vikings fic, I want to thank everyone who has liked, commented and reblogged all of my stuff and have been on this journey with me. I’m hoping his won’t be the end for writing for the Vikings characters, but, who knows what will happen!
My moodboard, page breaker and title page was made by the amazing and super talented @flowers-in-your-hayr
I hope you enjoy :)
Word Count: 8,161
Warnings: Smut, violence, fighting, angst, death, smut, fluff, Ivar
Vikings Masterlist
Four days without a word from him seemed weird. You'd been used to him just turning up whenever he wanted but there had been nothing.
If you had feelings, you'd be uneasy.
Getting dressed, you readied yourself to go out, to get some food for your apartment. You should tidy it up a bit, but you were thinking too much to concentrate on doing anything.
Food was always good though.
What you didn't expect to see, was Freydis outside your door.
Both of you were frozen for a little while before you went to slam your door shut but she stopped you, pushing the door wide open and you fell to the floor.
"I did wonder about the new one. Can't say I'm that impressed."
"What are you doing here?"
"He told you about me?" She said, eyes wide as she looked at you. Clearly the other heartless hadn't known who she was.
You got up from the floor, running to the opposite side and trying to get out before she could reach you, but it didn't happen.
She caught you by the throat, spinning you around so you were held up, pressed against the wall. Your legs kicked in the air, trying the find something to stand on while she choked you.
Horns appeared from her forehead, her eyes going black, a small circle of gold around the centre.
"All of you heartless are foolish." Her voice echoed, sounding as though several people were talking at once.
Your legs kicked out at her, catching her in the chest and she snarled as she threw you to the floor, skidding over the tiles.
She leapt, landing on you as you tried to get away. Her legs clamped down around yours, one hand holding your arms above your head, the other around your throat.
"Call him."
"I... I don't... Know how to." you choked but she tutted.
"You sing for him of course."
And then you screamed. You didn't know what she was doing but it felt like your head was on fire. Your neighbours could probably hear you, those out on the streets. You don't know if anyone came to see but you knew she wouldn't stop until Ivar came.
When the fire sensation stopped, you felt sharp pains on your arms, your chest and you began to cry, throat raw from the previous screams.
"Call him." She shouted and you couldn't take it anymore.
"Ivar... Ivar please."
You cut off with another scream and then her body was off you, a loud bang could be heard from the other side of the room and then his hands were on you.
You knew it was him from the feel and his eyes...
Gods his eyes look tormented.
"I'll get you out. Hang on..."
"Not so fast my darling."
You saw Ivar stiffen and he turned to see Freydis behind him, his horns curving on his head as he faced her.
"There's still more fun to be had."
She went to lunge at you, but you didn't know what Ivar did. One minute you were in your apartment and the next you were in the golden room again, Helga running over as she saw you.
"What happened?"
"Freydis found me... She..."
"Floki."
The man nodded, disappearing himself and Helga spent time cleaning you up, feeding you, making sure you had some strength back, but your head hurt, your body stung from whatever she had done.
Helga wouldn't let you look but there were bandages on your arms and one on your chest and you sensed she'd cut you in some way.
What felt like hours, Floki reappeared, Ivar with him and you didn't care this time.
Didn't care that he'd probably crush your heart and end you. You ran to him, throwing your arms around his neck and holding him.
And to your surprise, he held you back.
Then, he collapsed to the floor.
"Ivar... What...?"
"His legs have broken. He's alright, they just need putting back."
You went to move but Ivar stopped you, motioning for you to sit beside him and you did, fingers intertwined with his as he shouted once Floki put his legs back to normal, snapping the braces back into place once they were done.
After Helga helped you back onto the bed, Ivar stayed on the floor, watching you, always watching you.
You moved slightly, leaving space behind you, hoping that maybe he'd lie on the bed too.
You knew he wouldn't. He was a demon, demons didn't cuddle on beds with those whose hearts they had taken but you needed contact, needed someone.
Ivar knew your thoughts, was privy to them, so he must have noticed your inner turmoil because you heard him crawl over to you, pushing himself up onto the bed and then...
Then he lay behind you.
It was awkward at first, neither of you knowing what to do but when you caught the wounds on your arms when you shifted when you hissed slightly because of the pain and then let out a small sob, Ivar's arms came around you, holding you, pulling you to him and you cried.
His arms tightened, holding you as you sobbed and after you had cried until your eyes were sore and your throat raw, you fell asleep.
A single heartbeat in Ivar's chest could be felt against your back and you wondered what the significance of that could be.
When you woke, you felt the weight of Ivar's arms around you, his breath fanning across your neck and you shifted further into him, a sense of comfort wafting over you. You heard him groan low in his throat at the shift, arms pulling around you tighter, his front wedged neatly to your backside and then you felt him.
He groaned again, the noise vibrating through your body and his hand snaked under your jumper, splaying across your stomach, his little finger making circles on your skin above the waistband of your leggings.
His lips ghosted the skin of your neck, hand dipping under the waistband then and you shifted your legs, ready for him to reach that spot that you wanted him to touch, and he was close, so close and then his hand found your bundle of nerves and you let out a gasp, his fingers rolling and rolling and...
Then the door burst open.
"This is a surprising turn of events."
Ivar stiffened at the voice before pulling his hand away. You knew your cheeks were flushed bright red and you buried your head in the pillow, trying to calm yourself down.
"Floki. Don't you knock?"
"It's my establishment, don't need to."
"What do you need?"
The room went quiet, and you pulled your face up from the pillow, looking at Floki.
"You're welcome to stay here. It's a safe place and Helga has become fond of you."
"Thank you." You whispered, tucking hair behind your ear, "I'll need to get some clothes and..."
"Ivar can do that."
Ivar nodded, getting up from the bed, ignoring you and he disappeared with a blink.
"Just be careful. Ivar might act like a big, tough guy, but he's the sensitive type. He's been hurt."
"I'm not... There isn't anything... He told me he just needs me for the relics."
Floki nodded as though contemplating your words.
"He wants someone to love. He always has done. Freydis went wrong and Katia... That ended quickly. But you... I can see there's something different about you. Just treat him right."
And he went without saying anything else and you sat on the bed feeling confused and utterly frustrated that you were both interrupted before anything more could happen.
A shower would have to do.
You'd settled well into life at the bar. PanDEMONium it was called.
Helga and Floki were good patrons, looking after you, making sure you were well fed and watered. Helga seemed to love your jumpers, leaving printed out website pages with others that were more bright, more colourful and you laughed every time you saw them on your bed.
Demon for short.
You forgot they were demons.
Your boss had phoned from the school, saying that your suspension would be permanent, that you would have to find a new job and you knew Freydis was behind the choice.
You'd crossed Ubbe and Hvitserk once in the bar but, as stated, it was neutral ground, they didn't touch you.
Ivar had come and gone, saying a few words to you before leaving again and you knew it was to do with that morning when he had his hand between your legs.
You weren't quite sure how you should feel about it.
If you had your heart, it probably would have gone crazy, Ivar would have felt that you wanted him to touch you, that you didn't want him to stop but you didn't have one so how was he to know what you were feeling?
Plus, you wanted to ask him about Katia, the woman Floki had mentioned.
But he didn't stay long enough for you to ask.
So, with no job, you started working behind the bar for Helga and Floki, those who worked there helping you with cocktail mixes and doses. It was pretty easy to pick up, but you still got some things wrong.
You were getting ready to work now.
While the bedroom was gold, the bar itself was black and red. Fluorescent strobe lighting flashed red across the room, lit up words around the bar spelt out "lust" "love" "sex".
It was a bar that would house the elite.
Usually, you wore black jeans and a slightly muted coloured jumper, but Helga had given you a gift earlier.
A new outfit.
It was a fancier night tonight, she'd said.
You should dress up.
The dress itself was red, blood red, the kind of red that reminded you of the circle of red on Ivar's eyes when he became a demon.
Silky fabric that was going to cling to most of your curves and your curvy stomach.
The locket that acted as your heart rested nicely around your neck, your grandmother's ring on your finger.
There was a pair of flimsy heels on the bed but with one look at them, you could feel all the bones in your leg break. They were an accident waiting to happen, so you put on your trusty boots instead.
Ruby red lipstick on your lips, eyes ringed black with eyeliner and you were ready to go.
You were nervous though. You didn't wear clothes like this, and you didn't know who would be out there tonight, but you hoped that Ivar would show.
3 hours into your shift, and Ivar had yet to show but you were too busy to contemplate on it. You served Ubbe, trying not to take too much of an interest in him and another tall, hulking man by his side who propositioned you to be his wife several times.
Bjorn.
You knew all about him from the stories and the fact he seemed to be collecting wives just like Henry VIII did.
They didn't stay long but you could feel the linger of them after they'd gone.
You laughed, and joked with the others, turning down their offer of a dance once your shift had ended.
And then you felt the gaze of him.
Ivar.
He was sitting in one of the booths at the back, but you could feel the stare.
So, you made your way over, sitting next to him with a cocktail in your hand.
"What are you wearing?"
"A dress."
You put your legs up on the table in front of you and you noticed that he glanced briefly at them.
"Why are you wearing it?"
"Helga gave it to me. Said it was a fancier occasion. Although I'm not sure what the occasion is."
"It's my birthday." He replied and you looked over at him, dropping your legs and shifting on the chair to face him.
"It is? Why didn't you say? I'd have got you something."
"Like what?"
"A jumper." You laughed and you saw him roll his eyes.
He hadn't done that for a while.
You sipped on your cocktail, leaning your elbow on the back of the sofa and watching him.
"There's something you could give me."
"What's that?"
"A dance."
You raised an eyebrow and he turned to you, deadly serious.
"I do own you." he grinned, and it was your turn to roll your eyes.
"No."
"It's what I want. Do it."
There was a commanding tone to his voice, and you stared at him until you eventually got up. You didn't dance, didn't know how to but the music in the club changed to something sultry and your hips started to sway.
You'd never danced for Freddie. Never thought of doing this but here you were, swaying to the beat for Ivar.
Had he made you?
"No. I haven't made you." he echoed, noticing your thoughts and you turned to face him, your body leaning over his, hands on the back of the couch behind him. Not touching.
"I wouldn't even know if you had anyway."
"I swear. I haven't." He replied and you nodded.
His hands brushed against the bare skin of your legs, pulling you down onto his lap, hands settling on your bottom.
"Kiss me."
You did, a small peck on his lips before you pulled away.
"Properly." He growled and you did.
His mouth opened up beneath yours and you felt his tongue against yours. It was intoxicating. His scent and the feel of his hands in your skin made you feral.
You deepened the kids, your hands in his hair as you brought him closer and closer.
Your hips ground down onto his and you heard him groan into your mouth, frantic hands touching you under your dress until he found the edge of your panties, pulling them aside and touching you.
You let out a small moan as his fingers touched you, stroked you, sliding inside you as your hips began to move, riding his hand.
"Fuck." You moaned and Ivar was watching you, watching you while you rode his hand, gripping his hair and tilting his head back.
"You like that?"
"Yes." you hissed, and Ivar seemed to be amazed at your response.
"Ivar... I want you inside me."
His eyes shot up then, a brief look of vulnerability across his face.
"What?" You asked.
"Nothing."
He pulled his hand away, fiddling with his trousers but you pushed his hands away, doing it for him and you stroked him a few times once he was in your hand before you guided him inside you.
Your panties were pulled to the side, and you let out a cry once he was fully seated. Your hips began to move, Ivar thrusting up into you, matching your movements. Your hands were all over each other, touching and gripping, bruising as you tried to get closer and closer.
Your body began to tingle, the familiar feeling of your impending orgasm taking over your body and then you crashed, Ivar name falling from your lips and then he came too, a curse falling from his.
He wiped your hair away from your face before transporting the both of you to the private room you'd been staying in, “Here comes the demon." he echoed, his voice dark and you knew, you knew, you'd just started something that you might not survive.
Three days in the bedroom with Ivar and you could barely walk.
You'd unleashed the demon alright and he had not been gentle.
You had your hands tied, you'd been blindfolded, you'd been on your front...
Not that you minded but after the fifth orgasm, you had been ready to tap out. If he wasn't inside you, then his fingers were, or his mouth was on you. Over and over.
However he could take you, he had you.
And now you were travelling to another ice cave, wincing with every step while Ivar walked with a smirk on his face.
"What are we looking for?"
"A crown. You know, the ice might cool you down a bit."
"Fuck off." you replied, and he snickered.
During these months with Ivar, you often wondered what it was between the pair of you.
Was it love? Lust? You didn't know because you didn't have any feelings to tell you. But you knew that you wanted his attention, his touch. That you saw his face when you closed your eyes and you thought about him when you woke up.
But that just because he had your heart? Was it a condition of that?
The cave loomed in front of you both and you went through the motions of tying the rope around your waist and Ivar's, his hand under your chin as he tilted your head up.
"Be careful."
"I will."
He took your grandmother's ring off your finger this time, just in case you lost it again and he put it into his pocket before you started to walk inside.
You weren't concentrating, because your mind was preoccupied. During those days in bed with Ivar, Freddie and Gina had gotten married. You didn't feel anything because why would you, but you didn't hunk any bad thoughts either.
It happened; you couldn't deny it any longer. Freddie just wasn't meant to be yours and while you had been heartbroken, because who wouldn't be, you realised that maybe it was a blessing. He wasn't going to commit to you. He'd have done it years ago if he had meant to and besides, he and Gina had more stuff in common.
What bothered you was how quickly it happened but maybe you'd figure that out another time.
And then there was Ivar.
You hadn't meant to spend so much time with him, and you doubted spending time with you had ever crossed his mind.
But you'd drifted together. He came to you, half the time just because he was bored, not because he needed anything.
And then there was the dance. The dance that started it all. You had thought he'd controlled you somehow, but he hadn't, you'd danced for him, without any prompting.
You liked seeing him smile, you liked catching those glimpses of humanity in his face and you liked it when he touched you.
A far cry from the threat he had given you the first time, now, you touched him whenever.
Was it love or was it just what happened between a demon and his heartless?
You hadn't noticed the cave had gotten warmer until you felt less cold, and you looked up, reaching to grab the crown from where it stood.
When the walls started to come down, you expected to feel the rug from Ivar, but none came.
Which put your thoughts into panic mode.
You ran, trying to remember which way to go as the walls started to come down.
You were hit by ice, an icicle narrowing missing your neck and you could see the sky, could see the stars.
Just a bit more and you'd be there. Just a bit more and...
"I'll be taking that."
The tall blonde guy from the club. Bjorn.
He snatched the crown from your head before walking over to where Ivar was being held by his brothers, kneeling as he taunted him.
You went to go to him, but Freydis blocked your way, her hand wrapped around your throat as she stood behind you, waiting until Ivar caught a glimpse of you there.
"This is fun."
"Leave her alone." Ivar snarled and you caught the look on Hvitserk's face at the outburst.
"You know I never listen to you Ivar." Freydis said, a knife appearing in her hand as she plunged it into your side. Your legs buckled as searing pain shot through your body but Freydis held you tight so you couldn't just fall to the floor.
Ivar shifted then, his horns curving, eyes going black, and he went violent.
It was a blur at first, your eyes unfocused because of the pain and blood loss but you could hear snarling, the ground beneath you all shaking and quaking as they fought.
Ivar was a menace, and you could feel the fear radiating from Freydis. If it was making her scared, then you knew something bad was happening out there.
Freydis spun you around to face Ivar, your eyes opening weakly to see him standing there, blood on his face, eyes black, horns dark and his hands like claws.
There was a heart in his chest, blood dripping to the ground and you sucked in a breath at the sight.
"Ivar..."
"I told you not to touch her." His voice was deep, echoing. Dark.
"You always get like this. Remember Katia? You fell in love with her, and I killed her. I told you then what I'll tell you now; you may love your heartless, Ivar, but they don't love you back. How can they?"
"Let her go."
"Do you know any other words?" She joked, her laughter tinkling down your ear.
An inhuman noise fell from Ivar's mouth and Freydis pushed you to the ground, your face scraping along the gravelled path. The ground shook again, punches, snarls, and kicks echoing over the place and then...
Silence.
You tried to look but you couldn't lift your head, couldn't even move a finger.
You didn't think you'd die without a heart.
Then you heard footsteps and your head shouted Ivar, but it wasn't Ivar at all.
"Maybe I went about this all wrong. Maybe, I should have always taken out Ivar first and then let his heartless rot. It seems more fitting, don't you think?"
"Ivar." You whispered, voice weak and Freydis chuckled.
"Bjorn will be King, Kattegat will be under our rule and then you'll all be our minions. You see, Ivar may have wanted Kattegat back because he wanted something to call his own again but the rest of us, the rest of us want it for total control. Pity you won't be here to see it."
And she left you on the floor, your vision blurring more and more as you tried to find Ivar, but you couldn't see, darkness had taken over and then...
Nothing.
"Put her heart back in."
"Without Ivar, no one can."
"I'm not going to let her die."
"I have him."
"She's dying already."
Words could be heard but nothing was making sense until you felt another body beside you, a body you'd known for a few days.
Ivar.
"Y/N? Are you awake?"
"Ivar?"
"It's Helga. We've found Ivar but the pair of you are weak."
"Ivar."
Gentle hands pushed you back down to the bed and then your body was on fire, limbs stiffening and world blurring as the bed shook.
"She's fitting. Floki!"
"Freydis must have put something on the blade."
"Let me wake him up."
Light encased the whole room, turning everything white and then Ivar sat up on the end, gasping for air before turning to you, watching as your fit came to an end and you lay on the bed, little tremors making parts of your limbs twitch.
"Bring Thora, now." Ivar snapped and Hvitserk left quickly, bringing his wife back in seconds.
Thora ushered everyone out, but Ivar wouldn't leave, refused to, so she worked around him, using her demon powers and herbology skills from years ago to help.
By the time you had vomited up whatever was in your system, you lay peacefully on the bed and Ivar wiped your hair away from your sweaty skin.
"You like her don't you?"
"I didn't ask for you to talk to me."
"Ivar. She just helped her, show some courtesy."
Ivar rolled his eyes as Hvitserk walked into the room. He didn't quite know why his brother helped him back to the bar, why he fetched Torvi without any question but knowing Hvitserk, he wanted something.
"Fine. I like her."
"You love her." Hvitserk said and Ivar growled at him, "It's true. I saw it. The way you looked when Freydis had her, the desperate look in your eyes when she hurt her. You never looked at Freydis that way, you never looked at Katia that way either."
"You hardly knew Katia."
"True, but you weren't as infatuated with her as you are this one. What are you going to do?"
"Give her her heart back." Ivar answered swiftly.
"And then?"
"Stop Freydis."
"They are out for your blood, Ivar. You killed Sigurd."
"For her," Ivar said, looking down at you, "I'd do it again."
It was silent in the room, Ivar watching you as you shifted in your sleep, mumbling something about stars and a fox before settling back down once he'd soothed a hand over your brow.
"She'll be okay," Thora said, glancing at Ivar, "Whatever was on that blade, I got it out of her."
"Thank you. What is it that you want, Hvitserk?" Ivar asked, turning to the brother whose bond between them belonged by fate. Many times they tried to kill each other, fought each other, drive each other insane but they somehow ended up together again. Ivar always thought that he was the loneliest of the brothers, the one who didn't quite fit in, but with Hvitserk, he didn't feel so lonely.
"Believe it or not, Ivar. I've had enough. I don't want to rule over the world, I don't want the humans to be our property. I fell in love with one after all," he motioned to Thora, a sweet smile spreading over her face, "They are wondrous creatures, don't you think? They can love and hate all in one go. So many emotions, so many feelings, each one of them different. I don't want that taken away from them.
The others, they forget. Their wives were human once upon a time, they forget that very easily to suit them.
I want peace, Ivar. I want to live a life with the woman I love. Thora is pregnant, we've tried for many years and now it’s happened."
"Congratulations brother."
"Thank you, Ivar. Thora and I, we just want peace."
Ivar nodded, hearing the weariness in Hvitserk's voice and he knew then what he had to do.
"Freydis was right wasn't she?"
"About?"
"The heartless can't love me."
Hvitserk scoffed and Ivar looked up at him, even Thora was smiling.
"I don't care what that bitch has to say. Those few moments I've seen of her, of your Y/N, whether she has a heart or not, she loves you. And even if you give that heart back to keep her safe, I have a feeling she'll still love you then."
Looking down at you, Ivar could see a future, could see something with you if they could all survive this.
All the relics had been found but Bjorn only had the crown, Ivar had kept the other two hidden.
"You'll help me?" Ivar asked and Hvitserk nodded.
"Tell me one more thing. Has your heart started beating yet?"
And then, it beat when he found you.
Ivar tried to look away but there was no turning away from his brothers gaze. He nodded once, knowing exactly what that meant the first time he had felt it do so.
He was a heart collector, he collected hearts but his had been dead for so long, that he forgot what it felt like to feel that pulse in your chest.
He didn't want to believe that it was you, of all the people out there, it had to be this disorganised, overly colourful jumper wearing woman to make it beat.
When you woke, it was dark but at least you were awake.
He knew what he had to do.
A woman was sitting by the side of your bed, and you jumped, not knowing who she was.
"I'm Thora. Hvitserk's wife. I'm not here to hurt you."
"Okay."
"Why? Where Helga?"
"Ivar and Hvitserk have gone to war. They are going to fight the others, for the right to rule, for the right to keep the earth as it is. I'm to keep you here."
"They've gone too," Thora gave a little grin, "Every demon will be choosing sides to fight on. It isn't safe for you out there."
"Why aren't you fighting?"
Thora placed her hand on her stomach, smiling softly and you nodded, knowing what she would be risking if she did.
"The bar is safe. That's why we can stay here, once you go, however, you won't be able to return. They've hidden it from all other demons. It was Ivar's idea."
"Ivar? He's alive? He's..."
"Hvitserk saved him."
"Then I have to go. I have to make sure he..."
"You'll be wanted by all the demons if you do."
You shook your head, not caring about that at all, not once thinking about your own safety because Ivar was going to be there, and he needed you.
"Y/N. Listen to me. If you are so intent on going then take this," She handed you over a bracelet, tying it around your wrist, "It isn't much, but it will help you in a fight against them."
"Thank you."
"I noticed the ring in your finger too," She motioned to where it lay on your pointer finger, Ivar must have put it back on after he left, "Your grandmother gave it to you didn't she?"
"Yeah, she did."
"She must have had some foresight."
"What do you mean?"
"The ring. It leads you to the person you are meant to be with. The man who broke your heart, which wasn't him. He may have had some help with cheating, but it did you a favour. Because if that hadn't happened, it wouldn't have led you to Ivar. And you wouldn't have found your destiny."
"Freydis said the heartless can't love."
"Maybe that's true but, love comes in many forms. We rely so heavily on what our heart tells us, that we don't listen to our head, to other things. You chose to get those relics for Ivar, you chose to stay near him, you chose to dance and sleep with him. And that was from listening to your head. When you get your heart back, you'll have so many feelings rush back to you, that it'll be hard to figure stuff out, but you focus on Ivar, you focus on him and see what your heart says. Because if it aligns with your head, then you've done the one thing the other heartless didn't. You loved him without a heart."
Thora squeezed your hand, and you gave her a small smile before you picked up your boots, pulling them on and running out the door.
You weren't sure where to go but something was pulling you to the area. The streets were empty, as though everyone knew something was about to happen.
The clouds in the darkened sky seemed angry and dark, flashes of lightning illuminating the ground.
And then you saw them, two sets of demon tribes, getting ready to fight.
Despite the horns and the dark eyes, they looked as though they had stepped off the pages of a Viking history book.
Chainmail, leather braces on their arms, shields and swords and axes. Some had painted faces, others bare, and you felt as though you had just stepped back in time.
"Ivar." You whispered, making your way over to them.
You didn't know which side Ivar was going to be on, but you knew the shield you'd taken so you went and looked for that.
"You aren't going to win Ivar. The earth will be ruled by demons..."
"And I'll kill you. For Sigurd." a woman hissed, and you pushed your way through the crowd, spying a familiar face.
"Helga."
"Y/N, what are you doing here. You shouldn't be anywhere near this."
"I have to stay with Ivar."
"No, you don't. Look, I can open up PanDEMONium quick and get you back to safety."
"I'm not going."
"You'll die." Helga snapped and that brought the attention of others.
It was Ivar who saw you first, turning to look at you, a frown deeply set on his face.
"Go home." Helga told you but you shook your head, pulling out of her grasp and standing next to Ivar.
A few people moved out of your way, none of who you knew but had seen their faces on TV and stood next to Ivar.
"Look at who decided to come and play." Freydis smiled and you turned to look at her, "You do know you're going to die?"
"A lot of people have told me that and yet I'm still here."
"Send your human home, Ivar." another voice and you saw who it was.
Ivar's father.
Ragnar Lothbrok.
"This is no place for her." he said but you stood closer to Ivar.
Maybe it had been a mistake to come here but you couldn't just sit in the bar and do nothing.
"Y/N, go home."
"Ivar. I'm not going."
"Yes you are!" he snapped, "This is not up for debate."
You stared him down, that stubborn handsome man but you didn't make a move to leave. You were staying.
"Let's just fight. Get this over with." Ubbe said the eye roll you associated as Ivar's trait was clearly a Lothbrok thing.
"Helga, keep her safe."
Ivar pushed you back to where Helga was and she gripped your hand before you started to hear the rhythmic drumming of axes being hit against shields, of men shouting their own violent things.
"Helga, tell me one thing. How old are you all?"
"Thousands."
"The Viking era, am I right?"
She nodded and you let out a laugh. Of course, they'd start in Kattegat. All those history lessons you had of this place, of Ragnar Lothbrok and Aslaug, of their sons who ruled far off places and were great fighters, of Harald Finehair being the first King of Norway... Everything was starting to make sense.
They wanted Kattegat; they came to Kattegat first because this was their home first. They wanted it back.
Ivar wanted it back.
But the others, the others wanted the world. Not just Kattegat and this is what it all boiled down to...
Who would win what?
Would the world be taken over by demons? Made to serve them as they made deals and did unspeakable things? Or would they just have Kattegat? Would you still be under a tyrant ruler, or would Ivar turn it back to something else?
Helga held you firm as there was a surge of bodies that all moved forward, swords clashing, axes hitting targets and shields banging together.
You had no fighting experience, but you wished you did with watching them.
Helga threw a shield over the both of you as arrows reigned down, the ground shook with their fighting, bodies being slammed to the ground as axes and shields made bashed into them.
You could see Ivar, standing firm, shouting instructions and you felt better seeing him there, knowing he was safe and then...
Then he wasn't there.
You shook off Helga, running through people to where you'd last seen him. You avoided a few sword swings, thankful for Thora's gift and you found him, lying on the floor and shouting instructions for people to carry on.
"Ivar. What's happened? Are you hurt?"
"His legs broke. I need to put them back." Floki said and he motioned for men to surround them, shield them, while he snapped his legs back into place.
"Hey, focus on me."
You touched the side of his face, making him look at you and you smiled at him.
"You shouldn't be here."
"But I am."
You jumped as one of the demons fell, only to be replaced by another.
Ivar shouted as his other leg was snapped back into place. You knew he was in pain judging by his face, but you didn't know what else you could do.
"We should move him too..."
But a loud explosion happened, and you felt yourself being thrown across the ground, skidding amongst the broken bricks and gravel sticking into your skin.
Your ears rang, fog filled the air and then you saw booted feet before a tugging at your scalp.
Someone was dragging you by your hair and you tried to get away, but it didn't help.
"IVAR!" the voice boomed, and you winced at the loudness.
"It's over. Give me the other two relics and I'll let her go. You have no fight left in you. Surrender."
"That’s not how you do it, Bjorn." Freydis said and you felt a tug at your neck, the locket swinging from her fingers, and she dropped it to the floor, stamping down hard on it.
You shouted, Ivar shouted, even Helga did, and you felt your head sway, gasping and choking noises coming from your mouth as you tried to swallow down air, but it was no use.
Freydis had taken your locket and now you were going to die.
Ivar warned you to not lose it, he told you that it would mean death and...
You felt a strong pulse echo in your ears, blood seemed to spray across your face, and you brought your hand to your chest, feeling the strong rhythm of your heart and you saw the blue eyes of Ivar looking down at you.
"What did..."
"I got your heart back in time."
"I..."
But everything came back. Your heartbreak and pain, the way your scattered thoughts concluded to sell your heart. The love you had for Freddie, the times you spent with him and then came the emotions of your family, of how you felt and...
Ivar.
Looking up at him, seeing those blue eyes and curved horns, you felt your heart give one single, loud thumping beat when you looked at him and you knew.
You knew your head and heart had aligned when you looked at him.
"Ivar I..."
But then you felt more blood and his body slumping onto yours and you screamed as you felt his bodyweight come down on yours.
"Ivar. Ivar!"
Bjorn stood behind him, a grin on his face as he reached down to take the sword and shield.
"Stop."
You all turned to see Ragnar stopping Bjorn from taking it from Ivar.
"We aren't doing this. The earth doesn't need us and neither does Kattegat. We had our chance."
"Father... The world is bigger now, it’s..."
"No. I've had enough."
You zoned out of the argument, feeling for that single heartbeat in Ivar's chest but it was faint, and you began to panic.
"Help him! For fuck sake help him!" You shouted and Helga made her way over to you, Floki and Hvitserk behind her.
"He's dying. Save him, you have to save him." you sobbed.
But Floki shook his head, knowing there was nothing else to do.
"I can't..."
"He's your son!" you turned to Ragnar then, not caring that he was a demon, not caring about anything other than getting Ivar back, "Save him. Save him now."
"What is it to you?"
"I love him."
"You've been heartless for the past few months; you couldn't love anyone." Bjorn scoffed.
"I did. And I do. Save him now!"
"Y/N..." Helga softly called your name and you turned back to Ivar.
"Stay with me Ivar."
"Not possible. At least you are safe and have your heart back."
"You'll be fine." you cried, touching his face, holding tightly onto his hand, kissing his knuckles and not caring about the blood.
"You... You made a... Bad decision... Making a deal with me."
"No, I didn't. Bad decisions make good stories. And this is a good story! And we'll make more chapters. You and me together."
"Stories have to come to an end sometimes." he smiled, "Thank you Y/N. For making my heartbeat after all these years."
"Ivar," you shook him then, trying to get him to wake up and when he didn't, you shook him harder, "Ivar. Ivar wake up. Ivar please!" you were crying, could barely see out of your eyes and when you felt Helga's arms go around you, holding you tightly as you sobbed, you knew he was dead.
You wished you hadn't got your heart back because this hurt more than anything you'd experienced before.
On the 15th of August, at 11:59 pm, the demons left Kattegat and the other places they had set up home.
Ragnar had come to a deal with the others. The world wasn't particularly ready for them all yet. What started out as fun in the form of all the dealings, left a world full of regrets, violence and hardship.
They thought it would be fun. But the humans who had sold part of their soul, who had traded body parts for money or fame, were miserable.
When they left, the deals ended, people went back to normal but not you.
Never you.
A few demons decided to stay on earth, to build up a home but the fewer deals they took, the more human they became. Deals were what kept them alive for so long, feeding off of people’s emotions and once they had gone, humanity struck them.
You may have gotten your heart back, but it felt like you had lost it.
Hvitserk and Thora stayed. So did Helga and Floki, keeping the bar open, still being a safe place for others but it wasn't so much needed now.
Thora gave birth to twins, the card with photos inside arriving at your apartment and even though you smiled, there was nothing there anymore.
Freddie came back into your life, begging for forgiveness. Gina had made a deal with a demon to have him, he told you, because that was all she wanted in life, but you didn't care.
He wasn't who you wanted anymore and despite the begging and the presents and the coming around every single day, you didn't relent.
Maybe you would have done it in the past, but every time you closed your eyes, all you saw was the blue of Ivar's or the cheeky smile on his face.
It was hard without him.
You didn't take your job back either, not wanting to go back to a school that had easily been manipulated by Freydis.
It was her blood you'd been covered in the first time around. Ivar had ripped her in half for what she did to the locket, for almost killing you. He'd got your heart back so quick, shoving it into your body before it gave up so you could live.
You wanted to live with him though.
After a year, you finally felt ready to search for other jobs.
After two years, you'd moved to a new apartment. It was still chaotic and an organised mess, but it didn't hold so many memories.
And after five years, you soon realised that Ivar was gone, that little bit of hope that you clung to that he might come back, was dead.
Helga came to visit you when she could, her two adopted children by her side.
Thora and Hvitserk's twins were eight and curious about everything. You helped them with their school work and babysat them whenever you were free.
They tried setting you up with other guys, but you always declined. You tried twice but there was nothing.
Throwing open your wardrobe, you pulled on a pair of dark jeans and a jumper.
Not your usual jumper, however. No, those colours and brightness and funny prints were left behind when Ivar went.
You often felt guilty. Thinking that if you had stayed at the bar, if he hadn't had to rush to you to put your heart back into your chest, he'd have still been here.
You caught a glimpse of turquoise in your wardrobe, and you pulled the jumper out, seeing the different coloured mushrooms printed on it.
You sat back on the bed, holding the jumper to your face to try and catch any scent of him but there wasn't any.
The door to your apartment knocked and you walked over to it, clutching the jumper in your hands.
When you pulled the door open, expecting to see either Helga or Thora but your heart stopped when you saw who was on the opposite side.
"Ivar." you whispered, stepping back because this couldn't be happening.
"Y/N."
You looked at him, taking him in. The way he was stood, the familiar braces on his legs, covering his dark blue jeans. He had on a grey hoodie, a faux leather jacket over the top and his hair were tied up, sides shaved and the rest in a man bun.
"Are you just going to stand there or..."
You leapt at him, your arms around his neck and he took a step back to steady himself, his arms crushing you as he held you tight to him.
"How... How are you? You died Ivar."
He walked forward a little bit and you took the hint, pulling your arms away and walking him into your apartment, shutting the door behind him and leading him to the bedroom.
You sat next to him on the bed, curling up beside him, your head in his chest as he hugged you back.
"I know, I know. When they all left, they took me back too but my mother... I don't know what she did, but she brought me back. Bargained something of herself to do so. When I woke up, she smiled at me, brushed my hair from my face and then died. My father told me that she'd sacrificed herself so I could live. So I could get back to you."
“What was it she did?” You asked him, holding him closer.
“I have no idea. But once a demon dies, it’s impossible to get them back.
Whatever she did, she took years doing it. My mother was a seeress, she could see things and I think she could us. She could see you and knew I needed to get back to you.”
"I'm so sorry Ivar." You whispered, lips kissing his neck.
"I always thought she was the only woman who loved me and at the time she was. But you do too, don't you?"
You looked up at him, sitting over him as you brought your hands to his cheeks, cupping his face.
"I do. I really do."
He smiled, lips coming to yours and you kissed him, all those feelings that had been shut away since he'd died came rushing back.
It was only meant to be a kiss, but that kiss turned into more and more, hands pulling at clothes, fingers brushing against skin.
You undid his braces, not caring about his protests that his legs were ugly, and he lay above you, mouth kissing down your body, straight to the place where you'd been missing him for these past years.
It was as if you'd both come home.
You gripped his hair, his mouth devouring you until you were screaming his name, legs tightening around his head as you shook. He kissed back up your body, not giving you time to come down until he thrust into you, his lips cutting off your scream as he moved in you. Your fingers scratched down his back and strong, muscled shoulders, your teeth bit into his arm as you screamed over and over, Ivar's grunts like lyrical music in your ear.
You came together, names falling from lips as he rested his arms on either side of your head, kissing you slowly as little aftershocks travelled through your body.
Your heart pounded in your chest, his doing a similar rhythm but a little slower but it was more than it had been and...
"Your heart..." you gasped.
"I haven't made any bargains since I woke, I'm becoming human, slowly. Just like my brother. Which means a heartbeat."
"And...?"
"Growing old. A little slower than usual but if you stay with me, we’ll age at the same time."
"You're okay with that?" you asked.
"I've got you, I'm more than okay."
You pushed him onto his back, kissing him and kissing him, his fingers trailing up and down your back.
"So, let's fill that wardrobe with the craziest of jumpers, let's go and explore the world and just live." Ivar told you.
"My collector of hearts, are you telling me that you want to move in and be with me?"
"Yes. And there's only one heart I'm collecting from now on. I love you."
He touched your chest, feeling the strong heartbeat pounding. You touched his too, fingers tracing circles on his chest.
You may have been heartless, and he may have been the demon who collected your heart, but it was meant to be.
A/N: this is my entry for the @vikingsbigbang2022 event 😁 this was hard going as I didn’t think I was going to get it finished and had to rewrite a lot of it as the writing Gods weren’t smiling down at me, but, we did it! This is being posted on AO3 today too. This was going to be my final fic on here but I have joined a challenge for a close mutual and friend so that will be my final one!
This isn’t my best and I have definitely written better so I'm extremely sorry if this sucks! (which it will, I've been out of the Vikings fandom for too long)
My artists collaborator was the fabulous and amazingly talented @flowers-in-your-hayr who not only made a stunning moodboard, but also a page break and header for me. Thank you so much for being my artist Gabi!
Its going to be split into 2 parts. I’m not sure having 15k long fic, will keep you all interested haha
So… Here it is!
Word Count: 7,535
Summary: Ivar Lothbrok is a demon who collects hearts and you are a broken-hearted woman ready to sell hers so you don’t have to feel the bitter sting of heartbreak over and over again
But there’s something you don’t bank on; having to do tasks for Ivar
You thought you would just sell your heart and never see him again but that isn’t the case. And now there are other demons after you and you are hunting for relics for Ivar so he can rule Kattegat
Add that to the fact that Ivar has a woman from his past that wants to kill you too and you are pretty sure that you are falling for Ivar… despite the fact that you don’t have a heart!
Maybe it would have been easier to have lived with the heartbreak. But if you did, you wouldn’t have met Ivar…
Warnings: heartbreak, Ivar, violence, fighting, smut, Ivar, fluff, death, Ivar…. (Ivar is a recurring theme haha)
PART 2
Vikings Masterlist
Demons came to Kattegat.
No one knew exactly where they had come from but people from neighbouring towns and cities claimed that it happened because they were a town full of heathens.
That may be true, it may be because of that but when it happened in other towns around Kattegat, it could no longer be because of that.
Time stood when they came.
Clocks stopped at 11:59 on Samhain eve, everyone out partying and celebrating. The traditions may have disappeared over time, but Kattegat still kept them alive.
Honouring the dead, leaving out food and drinks for them, little at-home rituals get-togethers.
The younger people went out dressed up, laughing and drinking, having fun.
That was until they came.
At first, everyone thought they were spirits, that you could finally see your loved ones. But when eyes flashed red or black, when smoke rose over the ground and lightning crashed in the sky, everyone knew it was more than that, everyone knew something had arrived.
Details started coming out about them; how they made deals to get you what you wanted, what you desired.
Many people around you did just that; friends wanted riches or other people's husbands or wives, family members made a deal to bring someone back, life thrived...
For a while.
Until the demons came to collect their end of the bargains. Eyes were taken, limbs, voices, hearing, anything you could think of.
That's how they dealt.
Then came the family.
The Lothbrok’s.
Beautiful creatures but one's you did not cross. They rules Kattegat, became Kings and Queens, Princes and Princess and they told those others to repopulate, to travel, to spread the word.
Everyone lived in fear.
There was Ragnar and his Queen Aslaug, their sons Ubbe, Hvitserk, Sigurd and Ivar. Then there was Ragnar's former Queen, Lagertha, and his now occasional concubine and their son Bjorn.
Bjorn’s multiple wives; Porunn, Torvi, Snaefrid, Gunnhild and Ingrid. All of them were just as fierce and terrifying as the last.
There was Margrethe, wife of Ubbe and lover of all others, Thora, wife of Hvitserk. She seemed sweet, kind but of course, there was a wickedness there, just like the others.
Sigurd and his wife Blaeja. They weren't seen often, hiding behind the scenes but they were there, quietly watching.
And then there was Ivar.
Legs clad in braces to help him walk, dark clothing to match his dark hair and the most piercing blue eyes anyone had ever seen.
Everyone claimed the family was mad. Each one of them was plagued with something that had them flying off into rages, but you stayed away.
There wasn't anything you needed. You didn't need fame, you lived comfortably, and your job was rewarding enough. You didn't need anyone to fall in love with you as you were in a relationship with your boyfriend, Freddie. In fact, going to a demon never really crossed your mind. Why would it?
Until, of course, it did.
There was something about being broken-hearted for the fifth time that meant you were considering something drastic.
But, if it meant that you'd never have to feel again, it would be worth it.
Something that meant a life-altering experience.
Wouldn't it?
You'd think back on his name and feel nothing.
You'd look at him and your, now ex, best friend, and feel nothing.
You'd be nothing.
And that was better than hurting. That was better than the mind-numbing grief that was floating around inside you, at the grief that was threatening to drown you.
You saw them together; Freddie and Gina.
The shock was gradual. Until it wasn't. Then came the screaming and the crying, the shouting and the pleading until you ran out of Gina's apartment and never looked back.
You'd been broken-hearted before during school, college, and university but this... This was different.
This hurt. More than anything. Like needles stabbing into your heart a million times.
You were done with him.
Well, him and Gina.
And here you were, walking towards some sleazy alleyway with your arms wrapped around your middle, trying to keep everything in, as you sought out the person you were looking for.
Look out for the blue eyes, they'd told you, it would be the first thing you noticed.
It didn't take long until you saw them; blue eyes that shone in the dim light of the alleyway, eyes so blue, they pierced your soul.
"Are you... Are you the heart collector?" you whispered, and you saw a wide smile appear on his face before he walked further out to you.
"So what if I am eh?"
"I need you to take mine."
"And why would I do that?" His voice... It rang around the alleyway, chiming against the bricks with its lilt. You'd heard many people try and replicate that accent in school history class when the true owners of Kattegat lived here thousands of years ago. And here it was, in some dark alleyway, pure spoken, not a tinge of fakery. You moved towards it as though you were a puppet on a string, dancing towards its maker.
"Because I don't want to feel anymore."
He cocked his head to the side, trying to figure you out and you waited, waited until he saw whatever it was he was looking for.
It didn't come.
"That's not a good enough reason."
"I want to forget," you told him, seeing that he was about to pull away, "I want to forget what it's like to love someone. What it's like to feel your heart flutter when you look at them only to have them shatter it into millions of pieces. I want to forget the betrayal. I want it to stop hurting. Please. Please just take it."
He frowned a little, watching you, those blue eyes never leaving you once as he walked towards you.
You noticed then that he had braces on his legs, modern, sleek ones, black that blended into the colour of his jeans. You'd seen them before, in pictures...
A rumble of thunder could be heard in the sky. A warning maybe? Or a sign that this was meant to be?
"Are you sure?"
Another rumble of thunder and you looked up at the darkening sky before glancing into his blue eyes.
"What's this?"
"I'm sure."
"A contract. Sign it."
"It just says 'sell your heart'."
He watched you. No grin on his face, nothing to say that this was a great moment for him. All he did was pull out a piece of parchment from his jacket and a pen, before handing it over to you.
"Yes." He motioned for you to sign, and you did, your name scrawling along the dotted line.
"What do you do now? What happens when...?"
You let out a strangled scream, holding onto his arm as you felt his hand reach into your chest. Your veins burned, muscles screaming, bones cracking as you felt his hand, his magic, whatever it was grab at your heart. Your heartbeat pounded in your ears, thrummed through your pulse points and then...
Then nothing.
No heartbeat.
Nothing to say you were alive despite the fact you were still standing.
Your legs wobbled and you grabbed onto the wall edge to steady yourself, knowing the demon wasn't going to reach for you.
"Keep this with you at all times. You lose it, you break it, it gets damaged even a little bit, you die." He tossed a necklace into your hand before turning around and walking away.
"Wait, what do you mean I die? How am I still walking without my heart?" you stuttered, hand to your chest even though you knew it wasn't there.
"Should have asked that before I took it."
"Where are you going? Wait... You can't just... Heart collector, demon, whatever the fuck your name is, please just..."
"I'll be in touch. Get a list ready and I'll answer all your questions then."
And then he disappeared, just like that, as if you'd just blinked and he'd gone in those small, minuscule seconds your eyes had closed.
You looked at the necklace in your hand, turning it over to see the initials I. L. on the back...
I. L... You'd seen those initials before, seen the name in the news but you couldn't quite remember, couldn't quite...
Ivar Lothbrok.
You'd just sold your heart to Ivar fucking Lothbrok.
You were in deep trouble.
You weren't sure how you made it home, but you did.
Your apartment was still the same; overcrowded and a little messy. Full of books and notebooks scattered everywhere, cups on the table, plates that needed washing from last night.
Freddie's mug that he drank everything out of - bright blue and covered in planets.
And there, on the coffee table...
It was one thing you both liked. Planets, stars. Although now you thought about it, he probably only said that because you had nothing else in common.
But you loved him, and you thought he loved you too.
"Sentimentality won't help you know."
You grabbed the mug, aiming it at the person behind you only to see Ivar stood there.
He grabbed the mug before it could shatter, and he smirked over at you.
"Should probably lock the door after you when you get in."
"What are you? How did you know where I lived?"
"I have your heart remember? Come on, I need your help."
"What?" You asked but you saw him roll his eyes, putting the mug back down on the table.
"I need help."
"So?"
"It's in your contract."
Frowning, you remembered what it was you signed, no other words other than "sell your heart" was written on there.
Sensing you were trying to remember, Ivar pulled out the contract, holding it out to you.
There were more words on there now, sentences put together that wasn't there before.
"Help out with tasks, can turn up whenever, has access to private thoughts... What is this?"
"You signed the contract."
"You know my private thoughts?" You screeched.
"I have your heart. I can read whatever is in there. For example, I can feel how your heart shattered when you walked in on Freddie and, what was her name, Gina?"
"Stop it."
"How she rode him, how he moaned her name in pure bliss, how they saw you and Gina screamed and Freddie begged and begged and you..."
"Shut up!" You shouted at him. You forgot he was a demon, forgot who he was and what he had of yours and you hit him, hit him over and over, "Shut up. Shut up shut up shut up!"
He grabbed your hand before it reached his face, eyes blazing, jaw clenched.
"I'll allow that, just once but you don't touch me. Touch me like that again and I'll destroy your heart. You got that?"
He let go of your hand, pushing you back slightly and you put your hand to your chest, thinking it could steady your heartbeat but there was no heartbeat. If anything, that made you panic more but as there was no pounding in your ears from your heartbeat going erratic and your pulse points jumping off your skin...
"For fuck... You need to calm down."
"How do I do that? I could always tell when I was calm because my heart rate slowed but I can't feel that so I can't tell."
Ivar sighed, walking over to you and you felt him briefly touch your chest.
Whatever he did, you didn't feel as though you were on edge anymore and it helped.
"Find your own way to do that. That's the first and last time."
Nodding, you watched him walk to the hook on the back of your door, grabbing your scarf and throwing it at you.
"Wrap up warm. I'll meet you out front."
Ivar left and you stood where you were for a few minutes before picking up the scarf he'd thrown at you. You went to your bedroom, robotically going to your wardrobe and pulling out your warmest jumper before wrapping a scarf around your neck.
Ivar stood outside, leaning against your apartment building and looking like some forbidden dark God.
He might have been a demon, but you could appreciate the beauty of his features.
"What the hell is that?"
"What?"
"On your body." he gestured to your jumper, and you gave a little smile.
It was cream with primary-coloured bold flowers on it, smiley faces in the middle.
It was over the top and bright and you loved it.
"My warmest jumper."
"It's hideous."
"No, it isn't."
Ivar rolled his eyes again, something that seemed like a habit with him, and he pushed off the wall, walking down the street. You followed behind him, hands tucked into the sleeves of your jumper, wishing you'd brought some gloves.
It was getting colder the further you walked, the seawater turning icy, boats on the harbour frozen in place.
"Wh-wh-wh-where are w-w-w-we going?" You stuttered, shivering with cold.
"There's something in there that I need."
Ivar pointed to a cave, pulling out a rope from a bag he had with him. He moved over to you, tying it around your waist as you shivered on the spot.
"Told you to wrap up."
"I didn't th-th-think we were g-g-going to the fr-fr-frozen ice planet." you shivered again.
"There's no we. Just you."
"What?"
"I can't go in there. Only you. Only the heartless can enter. I need the sword; you'll know it when you see it as the cave will get warmer. Grab it and run."
"Wait, what?"
But he shoved you towards the mouth of the cave, holding on to the rope. You stood there for a while, bewildered and you heard him shout at you to hurry up, so you did.
Why were you doing this? If you'd known that selling your heart so you wouldn't feel any more about Freddie meant you had to do this, you'd have rethought your decision.
The cave was freezing but after a while, the cold started not to bother you. Your body was frozen, but you kept walking and walking and walking until you felt the heat.
Then you saw the sword Ivar meant and you reached for it, feeling something ancient surge through you as you held the hilt.
The rope around your waist began to tug and then you realised why - the ice around you was beginning to melt, huge icicles and frozen rocks beginning to fall, and you ran, bolstered on by Ivar tugging and pulling on the rope.
The cave started to close in on you as you ran, ice hitting you as you fought your way through. You couldn't see the entrance anymore, couldn't see anything except for white and then you were out, breathing in the air of Kattegat even though you didn't need it.
Arms came down on your shoulders and then you were whisked away quickly.
Blankets and duvet covers fell on you and someone quietly swore as they covered you.
When the shivering stopped, your eyes felt heavy and you closed them, falling into a deep sleep.
You didn't see Ivar for 3 weeks and you were thankful.
After you'd slept for what felt like 4 years, you had stopped shivering, had stopped feeling cold and now you were hungry.
Days blurred into one, you played with the ring your grandmother had given you, pushing it up and down your finger, nail polish chipped from where you'd bit your fingers. You stress brought more wildly colourful jumpers, spoke to your mom on the phone who didn't offer that much in terms of advice about Freddie, and you brought more books.
But it was the latest delivery that had you spiralling.
Too many books.
A wedding invitation.
Freddie and Gina.
It had been almost a month and they were getting married? You'd been with him for two years and he had never once hinted that he wanted to... That he'd thought about it.
Ripping it up, you threw it into the rubbish, walking to the fridge to get some cake when a loud bang came from your living room.
You ran in, holding scissors in your hand that you'd grabbed from the kitchen top and saw Ivar lay on the floor, his face bleeding, body curling in on himself.
"What the fuck?"
Ivar groaned and you knelt in front of him, pulling a blanket off your sofa, pressing it to his face.
"What happened?"
You got no answer from him, and you shook his shoulders.
"Ivar!"
"Dispute between brothers." he groaned, and you sat on the floor, trying to decide if you should run or help him.
"They don't know where I've gone. So help me." he growled.
"Please usually helps."
"I'm not in the mood."
But you sat there instead, and he managed to growl out a please. You went to the bathroom, pulling everything from the first aid box and went back in. He had managed to drag himself onto your sofa and you sat beside him, rummaging through the box and pulling out alcohol wipes and gloves.
You hesitated and he looked at you, only one eye open.
"What?"
"You told me not to touch you."
One eye-rolled and you let out a snort of laughter before he waved a hand at you and his face.
You wiped off the blood from around his eye, Ivar hissing as you did so. After you'd used all the wipes and then a towel from your bathroom and water, he was finally clean.
The wound was deep, and you tried your best to bandage it up, but it still looked like a mess. Either way, it would have to do.
"The best I can do." You told him, taking off the gloves and throwing them away.
"Please tell me you aren't training to be a nurse." he said.
"No. I'm a primary school teacher."
"That explains the jumpers. Why aren't you working now?"
"School holidays." You told him, bringing him a glass of water.
"Why did you come to me anyway?"
"Nowhere else to go." He told you, clicking on the TV as he put his feet up on the coffee table.
"I need you again."
He appeared in the coffee shop where you were grabbing a hot chocolate and Danish pastry and you shook your head slightly, not sure if others could see him or not.
"People can see me. And hear me." He said and you could see the eye roll.
"I always tell my kids that their eyes will stick that way the more they keep on rolling them. Wouldn't that be a funny look on you." you said, grabbing your plate and eyeing him over the rim of your cup as you blew on it and took a quick stinging sip of the hot liquid.
"Nope, they continue to do it anyway. What do you want?"
"And let me guess, they listen to you and are good boys and girls and don't roll their eyes anymore."
"I need something else fetching, only..."
"Heartless can enter, yes, I got that the first time. Look, I know you took my heart as per the deal, but you never told me why I have to collect these things, how long I have to live without my heart and what the fuck they are!" You hissed, making sure no one else was listening.
The table you were both at were surrounded by people and you didn't want anyone listening in.
"Maybe you should have asked these questions the first time around."
"What are you? A fucking genie who only allows those to answer a few questions?"
"Funny. And no. Look, you have to collect those things because you are heartless and only heartless can enter, you live without your heart until these things are collected and, once I collect them all... I get to rule Kattegat."
"Collect them all...? This isn't fucking Pokémon! This is my life. I still get cold now from that frozen place. Will they always be so cold?"
"Yes. And what the fuck is Pokémon?"
Your stomach turned and sick could be felt in your throat but...
You shook your head, groaning at all this when you heard the door to the Cafe opening, the bell on the door dinging and you saw them then...
Freddie and Gina.
You didn't feel anything at all when you looked at him.
No heartache, no longing, nothing to say that you had ever been in love with him, that he'd ever broken your heart.
"You can do better." The nonchalant tone came out of his mouth, and you raised an eyebrow at him before carrying on and eating your Danish.
"Y/N?"
Ivar turned when he saw your gaze, eyebrow raised as he looked, before turning back to you.
He sounded shocked, bewildered, as though he hadn't expected to see you, as though he was trying to remember who you were.
"Freddie." You replied, glancing up quickly and then back down again.
"You... How have you been keeping?"
"Freddie, sweetheart, don't disturb her. We don't want to rub all this in her face do we?" Gina and that sickly sweet voice said. You could feel Ivar's eyes on you, and you quickly looked at him, seeing him leaning casually on the chair as though waiting for something to happen.
"I'm going anyway." You told them, grabbing your bag from the floor. You'd come in here to do lesson planning for when you went back to work. Not sit here and have a demon sit opposite you and your ex-boyfriend and best friend standing there watching you.
"You don't have to go just because we..."
"Freddie, come on, we have to get lunch before the cake sampling."
"I just want to talk..."
"Why?"
Rolling your eyes at the whole mini argument between them, you left, not bothering to say anything to Ivar either but he was right behind you anyway.
"Y/N, please!"
"Go back to Gina, Freddie."
"I just want..."
"Will you just fuck off!" You shouted, finally having enough. Confrontation used to be something you hated. Anxiety rose in your throat at the thought, palms becoming sweaty and a pounding in your ears. But not now.
Gina was behind Freddie, eyes wide in shock as she studied your outburst.
You handed your bag to Ivar, knowing he'd caught it after you didn't hear it fall to the floor and you walked over to Freddie.
"Just leave me alone. It's bad enough that you cheated, it's bad enough that you are getting married after a month when we dated for years, and the thought never occurred to you and now you want to talk? Fuck you. Fuck you, Freddie. Fuck every little god damn thing about you."
And then you turned your gaze to Gina.
"And most of all fuck you, you jealous, backstabbing bitch."
You grabbed your bag then from Ivar, walking into someone in front of you and you saw the headmistress of the school you worked at.
"I think we should have a talk, don't you?"
You'd been suspended from your job. Normally, that wouldn't have happened but since you never checked who was around and a few of your students’ parents had witnessed it, you had to have time off.
So, when Ivar showed up at your apartment, wanting to know if you were ready to collect the next item, you were ready in seconds. Extra warmth this time.
You were quiet as you followed behind him, hands shoved into gloves, your grandmother's ring pressing firmly into your finger, the locket that acted as your heart resting comfortably around your neck.
Your jumper this time was bright pink, different coloured smiley faces all over it and you'd smiled a little at seeing Ivar's clear disdain for it.
You didn't know why he hated them so much, but you'd been trawling the online shops recently for even brighter ones, just to piss him off.
You, however, had to go to a demon who showed up everywhere.
When people spoke about doing deals with demons, they never spoke about seeing them after or them popping up whenever they wanted and asking for favours or turning up unannounced with blood all over their face. No, they just sold whatever and went on their merry way.
Maybe you should have gone to another.
But, looking at Ivar, catching a glimpse of him every time the street lights flashed over his face, you couldn't deny that he was handsome.
The stories people told of the Lothbrok’s, of the other associated with them, always described them as handsome, as though they had stepped out from another place entirely. Which, they had of course, but you could see what they meant.
Ivar came from a place that wasn't here.
He was tall, despite his legs being cast in braces, his eyes were inhumanly blue, his hair dark and braided.
Braided in a style you'd seen the Vikings wear in history class when you were a child.
Which was completely ridiculous because Ivar couldn't be a Viking.
None of them could be.
Could they?
The air around you got colder but Ivar didn't shiver once. You felt yourself gravitating towards him, despite the layers you'd worn today.
He glanced down briefly at you, frowning when he saw how close you were to him.
"What am I retrieving this time?" You asked, teeth not chattering this time like they were previously.
"A shield."
"Okay."
You waited while Ivar tied the rope around your waist tightly, securing it around his own before motioning you forward.
It was icier this time.
The ground beneath your feet was treacherous and you slipped a few times as you made your way in, seeking out the heat source.
It took a while to find it this time. The cave was cavernous, splitting off into different sections but you eventually found it.
It stood in the centre of the cave, on top of a huge ice stand. Red in colour with a black and yellow sun design in the centre.
It should belong in a museum, not here. Historians would go crazy for this. A relic from some bygone era.
A relic from the Vikings.
You reached out to it, your hands not quite grabbing properly due to the thickness of your gloves.
You pulled them off, reaching out for the shield when you heard a small tinkling noise on the ice.
You looked down, seeing your grandmother's ring and you panicked. You went to reach for it, but the walls had already started to close in since you were holding the shield and Ivar was tugging tugging tugging, pulling you towards the exit.
"Ivar stop." You shouted but he couldn't hear you. Nevertheless, you shouted, trying to fight back against his tugging but you were out, the shield lay on the floor, your hands touching the ground and you saw your bare finger.
You jumped up, running towards the crumbling cave and Ivar tugged on the rope, stopping you but you kept on trying and trying but he was far too strong.
"What's wrong with you?" he shouted.
"My grandmother's ring... It fell off, it's still in there."
"Can't you get another one?"
"Can't I... It’s a family heirloom, Ivar. Something my grandmother gave me before she died, something that she gave me to look after and now... Now it’s fuck knows where and I... I need to get it back."
"You can't go back in there. Y/N!"
You scrambled on the ground, rummaging through the slowly melting ice but it was coming up empty. She gave you that ring to help you, to make yourself see that you could be anything, she told you that it would lead you in the right direction, that it would always lead you to where you had to be, and it was gone.
All because of Ivar.
"Open it up again."
"I can't."
"Ivar!"
"It won't open. They just appear when the time is right and then they go again." He said.
"Well, who can I bargain with to open it? Surely someone must know. Ivar, I have to get it back!"
It was silent after you shouted at him and he looked at you, watching you as you scrambled in the ice, and he felt... Something.
He had felt something in years.
"Y/N. It’s gone." his voice was soft, and he heard you choke on your tears.
"You took my heart, Ivar, why am I still going through emotions. I'm not meant to feel."
"It's human autopilot. We can still cry, love, and feel, even after it's turned off. Just because you get rid of your fear, doesn't mean you can't still go through the motions. I took your heart, stopped your emotions but your body still knows what to do. You're crying right now because that's what your body wants. You aren't crying because you are sad, you're crying just because you can."
You sat down on the floor then, giving up.
"Come on, I'll take you home."
This is what it felt like when you were at your lowest all those years ago; body on autopilot.
You woke up, drank tea, ate food but you didn't taste any of it.
You got dressed, the bright jumpers usually made you happy, but you couldn't even muster a smile.
You'd lost the ring.
The ring you'd cherished.
Just gone.
"Since when were you polite?"
The doorbell to your apartment rang and you got up, opening the door, eyebrows raising as you saw Ivar on the other side.
But he didn't answer you and you frowned.
"Ivar?"
He handed you over a bag and you took it, looking inside.
Two little gifts lay in there and you walked back into the living room, motioning for him to follow.
He looked really sheepish as you pulled the wrapped gifts out of the bag, opening up the bigger one and letting out a smile.
A smile you hadn't done for a few weeks since you'd lost the ring.
It was turquoise, with red, yellow and pink cute mushrooms all over it. It was loud and colourful and something you would have brought yourself.
"You got me this?"
"Wanted to cheer you up."
"You did?" you asked, raising an eyebrow and you saw his cheeks flush slightly.
Ivar, the big bad demon, blushing.
You opened up the smaller one, seeing your grandmother's ring inside the box.
Silver, v-shaped, little Celtic design running through it.
"How did you?"
"Bargained. But it's back."
"You did this for me?"
"Yeah. I need my heartless girl back."
"Your heartless girl?" You asked, slight teasing in your voice and you saw him clench his jaw, cheeks going red, and you laughed.
"You know what I meant."
"Thank you. Thank you, Ivar."
You ran to him, hugging him, forgetting what he said last time about touching.
You heard a weak pounding in his chest before he pulled you back.
"I'll allow it just this once. Put your new jumper on, we need to go somewhere."
=
Somewhere, turned out to be a rooftop on some building that overlooked Kattegat.
The waters at this time of night seemed to shimmer under the moonlight, boats slightly rocking under the small waves.
"What are we doing up here?"
"I thought you deserved something. Usually, the heartless don't survive this long, one cave and they are dead. Or they meet another demon, one who doesn't like me, or they lose their necklace... But not you. You've done two caves, kept the necklace safe and haven't encountered anyone else, so, I thought I'd celebrate that."
"Celebrate?"
He nodded over to where a basket sat on the rooftop and you pulled it open, seeing pizza boxes.
"I wasn't sure what you liked to eat, thought this would be the easiest thing."
"Cheese and tomato pizzas are perfect."
You pushed the box over to him too and you watched him take a slice before you did the same. It was silent while you ate, contemplated what you should say but, it was peaceful not saying anything.
He was more casually dressed tonight. Jeans, hoodie and trainers. Legs still clad in braces. His hair hung loose tonight, and you felt a strong urge to touch it, but you stopped yourself.
"They found a replacement teacher for when they go back."
"Already? How long is the suspension?"
"Until the parents stop being angry. But it's a small town so they'll never forget. I might as well find something else."
"Who have they replaced you with?"
You scoffed as you took out your phone, finding the school newsletter where her face was plastered on the front.
She's what novels described when they talked about primary school teachers; blonde, petite, cute dresses and a sickly-sweet smile.
"That's her," you handed over the phone to Ivar, "She's called Freydis Agneson. Looks like a princess come to life."
You knew you shouldn't take it out on her, and you had no one else to blame but yourself but it was easier this way.
"Freydis." You heard Ivar whisper and you looked over at him, seeing his face drain of colour.
"Ivar? What's wrong?"
"No. No no no no... We need to find those relics now."
"What? Why?"
But he started mumbling to himself, pacing the roof and you watched him, not getting through to him whenever you called his name.
"Ivar!" you shouted at him but then the roof began to crumble beneath your feet, the boats in the distance started to rock violently, street lights started bending and then the roof started cracking, fissuring beneath your feet.
"Ivar. Ivar what's...?"
But the roof gave way from under you, and you felt yourself falling...
Until Ivar grabbed your hands, pulling you back up from where you'd been dangling seconds ago.
Looking up at Ivar, you went to thank him, but your words got stuck in your throat when you saw him.
His eyes were dark, black, with a ring of red around the centre. There were horns, curved horns coming out of his head, and his skin was pale, the scars on his face standing out starkly in his face.
"Get behind me."
His voice was deep, echoing and you did as you were told, watching as other demons suddenly appeared on the rooftop.
"Hello, Brother."
"What brings you here?" Ivar asked and you tried to peek over his shoulder, but his hand reached behind, grabbing your arm and holding you in place.
"We hear you've gotten two of the relics."
"Not sure where you have that information from."
"Cut the bullshit, Ivar."
The ground beneath your feet started to shake again and you reached out to grab Ivar's hoodie, holding yourself firm.
When it rumbled again, you found yourself gripping Ivar's hand, fingers sliding beneath his as you held tight.
If he was annoyed, he never showed it, just gave you a little squeeze.
"Fine, I have two relics."
"So, you are still going ahead with this plan then. You know, out of all of us, it should be Bjorn."
"It's a shame Bjorn only thinks with his dick and not his head." Ivar said and you could sense the smirk on his face.
"So, your heartless must be a pretty special person, if they've managed to survive this long."
"Must be." Ivar echoed.
"Doesn't exactly blend in though, does she?"
You felt Ivar stiffen and then you were moving, standing to the side of him even though you couldn't remember walking. Ivar's hand was still gripped in yours and you saw the three brothers smirking.
"She's the opposite of Freydis."
"Whatever would she say?"
"Freydis?" You asked, the name coming back to you as the woman who was your temporary replacement.
They all had black eyes and horns, each one slightly different in appearance but there was no mistaking who they were. You'd seen the pictures, everyone had.
Sigurd, Hvitserk and Ubbe.
"Ivar's first heartless." Sigurd grinned and you could see that he enjoyed winding Ivar up.
"Shut up."
"You haven't told her, brother? She was his first heartless. The woman he fell in love with, the woman he made into a demon so they could stay together..."
"I'm warning you." Ivar said through gritted teeth.
That's why you are such a surprise. Ivar tends to go for the same person; to aid in his torment. Beautiful, petite, curves to rival any supermodel... But not you." Sigurd was grinning wider, and you tugged on your sweater, feeling uncomfortable under his gaze.
So, you were ordinary looking, what did that matter? You were a little chaotic at times and rather chose comfort over dressing up but why should that matter to them?
"And then she betrayed him. You see, no one wants a cripple for a husband, no one wants a monster for one. Freydis just wanted immortality, made it so she got it all before stomping on his heart. She also made sure that he wouldn't love anyone other than her, comes back every few years to check up on him. Maybe kill his new heartless followers.
"And what are you? A beauty expert?" you found yourself snapping back and Ivar threw a warning look over your shoulder.
"You dare talk to me?"
"I'll talk to whoever the hell I want. Don't you ever talk about me as if I'm just shit beneath your shoe? You aren't exactly handsome for a demon yourself."
Sigurd roared then, Hvitserk and Ubbe trying to hold in a snigger at your comment and you felt yourself being blasted across the roof, back hitting one of the higher walls, head-smacking off the pavement.
"That wasn't nice." Ivar said, turning to Sigurd even though he wanted to run to you to see if you were alright. Sigurd grinned and Ivar knew what was coming next, everyone knew what was coming next.
The ground rumbled through every punch, hit and kick, Ivar and Sigurd had always done this with every disagreement.
This one was violent, more violent than usual as Ivar was determined to make Sigurd suffer for what he did to you.
Ivar slammed his horns into Sigurd’s side harder than usual and went to manifest his axe to slam into his chest, but Ubbe pulled him off, tossing him aside.
"Enough. Both of you. Go and see to your heartless, Ivar. And then we'll talk when there are no humans around."
They disappeared just as quickly as they arrived, and Ivar moved over to you.
You were breathing still but he was sure you'd broken something. You'd have to have done because that blast was deadly.
He put a hand on your arm, moving you from the roof to an underground bar. He couldn't pick you up, his braces were a hindrance, but he knew someone who could help.
"Floki. I need you."
You woke up in a strange place.
The inside of the club was covered in gold accents - gold curtains, gold lampshades, gold chairs.
Even the bed you were lay on had gold silk sheets...
Wait.
"Hi."
You turned at the sound, seeing a smiling blonde woman with thick eyeliner on her eyes. You tried to move away but your head spun when you tried to.
"It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm Helga, my husband, Floki, is talking to Ivar at the bar. The ground here, it's neutral territory. Ivar brought you here to be safe."
"His brothers. Freydis. Being here will mean you can't get hurt."
"Safe?"
You nodded a little, feeling sick once you did so but Helga handed you a glass of water, which you gratefully took.
"I don't understand any of this."
"Those who make bargains with demons never do. And Ivar is the most secretive of them all. There's a reason he collects hearts, apart from us and his family, no one else knows. Everyone thinks he is heartless himself, that he can't feel but he feels more than anyone. Think of him as Hel. Or Hades. Or whatever other Gods you worship."
You listened to her hut you couldn't take it all in. You were trying not to pass out again and Helga could sense that.
"Go back to sleep, I'll let him know you were awake."
You settled down, not trusting yourself to speak in case you threw up.
Dreams were a mixture of lots of things; demons and Freydis. Your job and this club, each one blending into something akin to horror as they all ended one way...
With you dead.
Sitting up straight, you groaned because of the sudden movement. You felt a cool hand on your forehead, and you looked up to see the blue eyes of Ivar.
"How are you?"
"I feel like I've been hit with a truck ten times but I'm okay. How are... Wait, what happened to your face?"
You reached over but Ivar stopped you from touching him and you remembered his rule from that first night.
Holding hands clearly was a pass because he'd have shaken you off otherwise.
Or crushed your heart.
"Nothing. It's fine."
"Ivar, you are bruised."
"Sigurd, that's all."
You nodded, moving back towards the bed and you continued to watch him.
"Are you going to tell me everything?"
"What do you want to know?"
"What I'm getting myself in for. I sold my heart to you, so I didn't have to feel my heartbreak. So I didn't have to remember what that felt like. And now I have demons who would kill me, I'm collecting relics from ice caves and your ex has my job. So please, Ivar, please tell the truth."
It was silent for a while. You thought he wouldn't tell you, that he'd get up, disappear, toss your heart back and tell you to go but he moved on the chair, leaning back and looking over at you.
"I'm a demon who collects hearts. You get assigned roles at birth, mine was always to be that.
I was the monster when I was born. Because of my legs. Demons are born whole but I wasn't. And because of that, they thought, hmmm let's make him be the one to collect other people's hearts because he'll never truly find anyone who would give their heart to him willingly.
I collected them like trophies. Men, women, anyone who wanted something. Then along came Freydis."
His eyes took on a faraway look, as though he was there, at that moment again.
"She was beautiful. Everything someone like me shouldn't want but did anyway. She sold her heart to me so she would forget the man who hurt her. She helped me with tasks, and we spent more time together. She told me I was special. Told me I could do anything and like a fool, I believed her. I fell in love."
He scoffed, scratching his head before folding his arms across his chest.
"A demon who collects hearts fell in love with a heartless. She said she loved me. Married me, carried my child."
You looked over at him then, seeing grief and something else in his eyes. You wanted to reach out to him, but you knew the hand-holding was a one-time thing.
You couldn't help but watch him.
"The child wasn't mine, but I thought it was. Once she got everything she could possibly want; immortality, family, money. But I wasn't enough. I never am.
So she staged a war against me. We were all squabbling between ourselves as to who should rule, and she turned them against me. Took the relics and hid them in caves. Freydis was cruel, she mocked me, tormented me and then told me that she'd be the only one in my head and anyone else who came along, any other heartless I'd get close to, she'd kill. Because even though she didn't love me, she didn't want anyone else to have me."
You couldn't feel anything because you didn't have a heart, but you knew what you would be feeling.
You'd be feeling sorry, heartbroken, pity. You wanted to reach out, you did, the pain in his eyes was unbearable but being this vulnerable, this open, you knew he'd more than likely crush you.
"That's why I need those relics. I can get Kattegat back, get my home back. The heartless I have don't survive long because of Freydis, my brothers. I thought I'd done a good job of keeping you out of the limelight, but she has your job. She's closing in."
"That’s all you need me for? To fetch the relics?"
"Yes. What else would I need you for?"
He'd got your ring back.
Surely you were more than just a relic hunter?
He gave you a sideways look and you nodded. He'd brought you a new jumper, had treated you to pizza, saved you, brought you to a safe place, had held your hand... Of course, it had been all because of the relics, because he needed you for that but...
"When do you need me ready by?"
"Just... Just get better first. We'll worry about that later."
Tagging: (I would like to apologise as I deleted my taglists as I wasn't going to need them anymore and this is all I remember 🙈)
