4, 15, and 23 (i was going to ask more but i didn't wanna overdo it and since you sent three to me, i figured i should do the same! i love you!)
me: reblogs asks
also me: has nothing interesting to say
4. Where did you get your inspiration from?
I love that it says “did” because it implies people don’t have inspiration anymore haha--
Hmmm. I know that’s not really the way it’s supposed to be but I think I get most inspiration from either other works or just... other creations in general, like video essays or just... hyper fixating on one line and then thinking about the implications for 4 hours at like 6 a.m. and then writing a very questionable AU about it. Purely theoretically.
I definitely can’t cite real life as an inspiration because literally nothing is happening to me, but I think I’d still count interaction with others? Bouncing stuff off of others. I’m not the best... at having ideas, whatsoever (neither coming up with them nor making them fit into a coherent narrative for longer-form projects), so I’m always thankful for people sharing theirs with me and letting me lowkey steal them, even if they just start out as a joke / stay a joke.
Which is probably also why I tend to yknow, make fanart and not original art and why I often draw fic art.
15. What made you start to write fanfiction/stories?
I think I did it for a long time, even when I was tinyTM, but back then it was just... inspired by those horse fan merchandise we got monthly and there were always books and I liked one of them for the drama and so I tried to copy that and replicate it. Even in my origins, I’m nothing but a copycat haha-
Anyway, I think my first fic-heavy fandom was because I wanted more content or different content of something, usually a ship. I don’t think that has changed to this day. I never really care for the actual romantic ships enough to create content for them. I think that’s partly because if something is romance, there’s USUALLY already romance in the thing?
I also like a very melodramatic type of angst and pain that’s often not plausible, smart storytelling or common in the media itself, so I will SLAM it onto everyone I love. Blinding people, impaling, death (oh. so much DEATH scenes), all that stuff. I like the aspect of fanfics/fandom that allowes you to write so many different outcomes and versions of something (you can kill someone and still get your fixture of fluff in another AU/fic/whatever). With me trying (and miserably failing) to create something original, I kind of miss that freedom. Having a base and kind of doing whatever with it. It’s not impossible, of course, to do that with original work, but I think it largely undermines your vision if you have 10 versions of it.
Though, as you all know, I’m not very good at sticking to canon in long-form projects, which I think is partly due to me, again, not being very good at stories overall and so I don’t feel like I’m “fit” to insert something into something I already love the way it is. Even if I WANTED to change something, or make a “serious” in-universe divergence, I usually question if it’s actually better the way I’m imagining it (like if I insert this instead, it would ruin something later / it’s not patient enough / etc.) and usually cripple in front of the huge ambitions. For concrete examples, I just did a post about JJK earlier regarding this and also with “Welcome to the Love Café” I felt similar. I thought about doing a divergence where a consequence that was implied actually gets carried through, but I just didn’t... feel as if that would actually lead to a satisfying ending or improve anything long-term, aside from giving me fixture of angst.
So... I guess in summary, angst and indulgence, mostly. I’d LIKE to do more divergences/fixes/canon-ish AUs but I’m not really that good at it or handling them seriously.
This sounds more like a general motivation, more than what started it BUT LET’S NOT WORRY ABOUT THAT.
23. Most memorable review/comment on a fic?
For a moment, I just sat here, thinking “huh... I don’t... think there is any”. And then I went to check my ao3 because I was honestly startled. I really appreciated the comments on the A/B/O au that pointed out some universe-building stuff I came up with though! Hearing them think of those half-baked ideas that way made me happy.
Also the comments on the early Until Death chapters are so nice, there were quite a few long, reactive ones by Amy and a certain girlfriend.
I will say I ACTUALLY remember someone’s comment on one of my nsfw-isher comics/works. I wish it could have been for something different, but they went on about a lot of things in general about my art (how far I’ve come, that I portray the characters nicely and they can read it in their voices - which is really the highest form of praise to someone who constantly thinks their AUs don’t have any point and are OOC), and I just remember that it made me cry on one of my “numb” days. So I remember that fondly.
In general, I guess I should be more thankful for the comments I get, but I remember those about my art more clearly udkhsdj
