‘ tell me you’re not miserable ’
richard siken’s crush starter sentences | @viisciousaccepting
concern is nothing something jayce is used to. people pretend to care, you see, as anyone would for a public figure of renown in a city as hellbent in keeping to appearances as piltover, but no one really did. gemma was paid to look after his schedules, and every other gioparan only cared to know about the profit he brought and if he was in good enough health to keep it coming. no one gave much thought to who he was, but what he did — the line had been drawn in his mind since the first year he was forced to keep to the mantle, since the first year he had to learn he had to be a persona, not a person.
it gets exhausting, especially when the persona required is so starkly different from the man behind its mask, and even if now and then something cracks through, something makes way onto the surface, it’s hard for people to catch the meaning of it all.
he doesn’t really care, you see, but it’s tiring. it just shows how easy to fool most of piltover is. with all of that said, when vi approaches him that evening in some progress-forsaken gala made for the police department after the conclusion of a big case, he isn’t expecting her to be surgical like this. he isn’t expecting it, but even so, the facade doesn’t falter as he lets out a disbelieving little laugh over his glass of champagne. there’s a hint of tension in the way his posture changes, the way he shifts his weight from one foot to another, but it’s—minimal detail, it’s too small for anyone to care, right?
it’s always been that way, so vi can’t really mean what she says. it’s statistical and numbers don’t betray him like people do.
“—c’mon, vi. what about this,” he gestures towards the party around them and his eyes are dead despite the smile on his lips. “speaks of misery to you?” answer is: everything. but he’s a good liar and good liars often are exceptionally good at fooling themselves to make their tale more believable.
“i’m doing great as you can see, so you go stay with your girlfriend.”
