Can I get all my visually impaired mother fuckers around for a second!!!
SOOO I have albinism and my eye muscles are not strong enough to foccous on things this is called nastagmus. I also have astigmatism AND I’m near sited and far sited. To say the least I’m blind as fuck. As you may have suspected this means I can’t drive. Now I am very lucky because despite my plethora of ailments I can see well enough that I don’t need a cane and I’m using a normal phone right now without voice over or anything. HOWEVER anyone who CANT drive (and I mean can’t there is a difference between lacking the physical ability to preform the task and not wanting to (and I am counting anxiety as not wanting to even tho I do know that anxiety isn’t like something people just choose to do or have trust me I have that too)) will tell you not being able to drive really makes it feel as though you lack independence, especially when you live in an area that’s basically anything but a city (which I do). SO the point of all this exposition is that I am 21 and have stunted my own life significantly because I’m harping on the fact that I can’t drive it makes me feel like I want to throw my hands up and say fuck it I can’t do it anyway. I know that is a bad attitude to have but I can’t help it and all the people in my life always say “it’s not that big of a deal”, “lots of people can’t drive” and “you can just move to a city when you’re older” (said that to me at 18...like I kind of need it now but k) and TODAY my mom is about an hour away visiting my brother with my other brother and she wanted me and my boyfriend to pick them up and I was like work Ight but we have plans today so it’ll be later. And she’s all frustrated because she doesn’t have a ride at exactly the time she wants it in exactly the vehicle she wants it in and I’m just here like...........every time I need a ride anywhere I have to be considerate of everyone else’s schedules to the point where when I was in college I spent an entire 12 hours on campus every Monday - Thursday when I only had 4 classes because I had to get dropped off at like 6 am and couldn’t get a ride home until about 6 pm, but never did you hear me complain to any of my rides about how early or late I had to get picked up or dropped off because I was just greatful to have a fucking ride. Moral of the rant I guess is I know I fuck myself feeling sorry for myself and stuff but people who can drive really take it for granted and it drives me fucking crazy because the only person who could even kind of understand where I’m coming from is my little brother because he has the same ailments as me but he just is not as salty about it which is great but leaves me feeling really lonely Rant over I guess