Desde que me mostraste esa canción, hay algo en mí que se mueve cada vez que la escucho. Como si vos y yo estuviéramos hechos de la misma materia que canta ahí… algo que no es de este mundo. Me emociona saber que te recuerda a mí, porque también siento que esa letra nos escribe, que habla de nosotros, de esto que compartimos.
Hay momentos en que te siento muy cerca, como si tu energía me rozara incluso a la distancia. Y otros, donde me cuesta encontrarte, como si te desdibujaras un poco… y ahí me duele, porque te busco con el corazón abierto.
No sé exactamente qué somos ni qué vamos a ser, pero sí sé que sos una de las presencias más intensas y significativas que tengo. Siento que nuestras almas se reconocen, y que hay algo en vos que me hace querer quedarme para siempre.
Solo quería decirte eso. Que estoy acá. Que siento todo esto con una profundidad que a veces no puedo explicar. Que me gustaría que sigamos descubriéndonos, incluso si eso significa perdernos un poco a veces y volver a encontrarnos.
synopsis: your desires for a fellow crew member deepens as you slowly come off the blue.
a/n: i gotchuuu this movie was so ass but he was so fine in ittt, also u didn’t specify what exactly the scenario was so i hope this is okay😭
it’s been almost a week since you stopped taking the blue. kai said it was medication, and since richard was gone, that meant no rules. well, besides from christopher being a pain in the ass ever since he was voted to be richard’s replacement. you didn’t know if you were having withdrawls from not taking your medication or not, but you’ve been having strange thoughts about a certain someone on the ship — kai. you’ve always been close to him, only as friends of course. he helped you around a lot with your projects, he was kind to you. but now, you can’t look at him in the eye without thinking about the unspeakable thoughts you have about him.
you didn’t have these vulgar thoughts about anyone else but kai. sure, every once in a while there would be something about the other boys on the ship, but nothing as extreme as the dreams you have about kai. you would twitch nervously around him when he would talk to you let alone being in the same room as you.
you scratch the back of your neck, staring dully at the metal boards in front of you. you had to build something for a part of the hardware for the ship, but you didn’t know where to start. you look around, watching as the other pairs around you worked efficiently. you furrow your brows, tapping the edge of the screws with your screwdriver. “hey,” kai says while placing his hands on your shoulders. “fuck!” you yelp, turning around to him. “you scared me,” you breathe out. he raises his hands up in defense, “sorry, you need help with that?” he replies. you look down at your work space, a mess in front of you. you nod sheepishly, embarrassed.
he gives you a friendly smile, sliding his hand into yours to grab the screwdriver. you shiver as his fingers graze over yours. you watch as he starts working, his curls falling over his eyes. his sleeves were rolled up and you couldn’t help but look down at his large hands — slight veins running up his arms. he senses your eyes on him, he looks over at you with parted lips. “do you wanna do it?” he asks while offering the screwdriver back at you. you shake your head hesitantly, “i don’t know how, i wasn’t really listening when richard was explaining.” you admit shyly. kai laughs, straightening his back. “i’ll help you out, i’ll tell you where to put stuff.” he waits for an answer as you rub your arm nervously. you nod, switching spots with him.
you grab the screwdriver, listening to kai’s instructions. unfortunately, you were horrible at listening to his directions too. you were too distracted by his voice. “have you been feeling strange?” kai asks abruptly. you snap your head up to him, feeling slightly aroused at his height compared to you. your eyes dart around the room anxiously. “like how?” he shrugs, staring down at his hands. “i don’t know, like desires… about things.” the way he says it makes you think he’s been having those thoughts too. you feel uneasy, almost a little called out. “yes,” you admit. “have you?” you inquire. he gives you a skeptical look, but nods in return. you hum, trying to focus on your work.
“c’mon guys, you’re not even halfway done.” christopher interferes. he looks disappointed at the two of you. “sorry,” you utter in shame. kai doesn’t look embarrassed though, he looks more annoyed than anything. you glance around, realizing everyone was either gone, or finishing up their part. “can’t we just finish this tomorrow. we’re both tired.” kai says. christopher looks at the two of you, waving you off. he walks away, leaving the room. you sigh, your screwdriver clattering onto the white table. “we’ll have more time tomorrow, it’s fine.” kai says while patting your shoulder, the warmth of his hand on your skin making you sweat. you bite your lip to keep your thoughts to yourself.
you feel his hand fall farther down your back, almost touching your hips. you look over at him, his eyes staring down at you. “i think i’m gonna go get some rest.” you say while moving back. he draws his hand back quickly before placing them to his side. he gives you an awkward smile, nodding. “yea, me too.” he mutters. you say goodnight to him, rushing down the dimly lit halls back to your room. you close the door behind you, trying to comprehend what had happened. was he having thoughts about you too? you waved it off, laying flat in your bed. you look up at the dark ceiling, the vulgar thoughts about kai slowly slipping into your mind. you groan, closing your eyes trying to drift off to sleep, but it doesn’t work.
you feel guilty as your hand travels down your stomach to the waistband of your pants. you slowly touch yourself, feeling the wetness of your cunt. you think of kai touching you, grinding against your naked figure. you moan quietly — imagining his large hands exploring every part of your body. before you could reach your sweet release, you hear a knock. you sit up abruptly trying to fix yourself up. staring at the door, you breathe out and carefully walk over to the door. you stand there for a second before opening it. you hide behind the door, peaking your head out. kai’s standing in front of you, his hands behind his back. he’s looking at his feet before turning his head to face you. he stares down at you, a slight smirk on his face. you look up at him, worried he might’ve heard your soft whimpers through the door.
“you forgot this,” he says while revealing a notebook behind his back. you grab it, thanking him. it had all your notes on research you had done earlier that day. you both stand there, an awkward silence blooming. “so,” he starts, “can’t sleep?” he asks. you nod, avoiding eye contact with him shamefully. you feel his fingers on your jaw as he moves your face to look into his eyes. “you can’t look at me now?” he whispers under his breath. you gulp, parting your lips to say something — but he quickly shushes you by smashing his lips onto yours. his hands quickly falls to your waist, shutting the door loudly with his back. you drop your notebook on the ground, looping your arms around his neck, feeling his tongue exploring your mouth. you whimper as his rough kisses trail down to your neck.
you whimper as he staggers closer to your body, pulling off his fitted long sleeve and pants. his hands wander up your shirt, unclipping your bra. you take off your shirt, stripping down to your panties. kai grabs your arm, softly pulling you towards the bed. he sits down on the edge of the small mattress, looking down at the floor signaling you to kneel. you do as you are instructed, immediately falling to your knees in between his legs. your nails dig into your thighs as you watch him edge the band of his boxers. he’s messing with you and you know it. he gives you a smirk before finally pulling them down revealing his thick cock, already dripping in precum.
you look up at him, eyes wide. he leans back on his hands, tilting his head at you. you take his dick into your hand, slowly pumping up and down. you glance up at him, his mouth slightly opened. he rolls his head back, breathing loudly as you slowly swirl your tongue around the throbbing tip. “you’re so beautiful like that,” he mutters with lust. you hum, your face warm from his praises. you start bobbing your head up and down on his dick, eyes getting teary. you knit your brows together realizing how wet you were getting. you suck him up, your pretty lips parted around his girth. kai cups your cheek with his hand, his thumb rubbing your jawline softly. he groans as your tongue continues flicking over his tip. “that’s it baby, that’s it.” he chants as you lock eyes with him. you pick up your pace, placing your unoccupied hand on his thigh for balance.
“fuck, i need you so bad.” he mumbles as you gag on his dick. you shove your head down his cock, taking in his full length down your throat. he loved the way you looked with tears running down your pretty face, those swollen lips around his dick, and your puppy dog eyes looking up at him. he watched his dick poke through your throat. you come back up to his tip, whimpering when he grabs your head, softly forcing you back down on his cock which causes you to whine. you close your eyes, shuddering as the cold air brushes past your breasts. “kai,” you manage to mutter through your cries, “mhm,” he replies as his hand cups your face again. you line wet kisses on the sides of his length, gliding your tongue over the tip.
that sends him over the edge. you hear him choke back a moan, coating the insides of your mouth with his cum. he sighs, looking down at your small figure underneath him. you lick up his semen, a lewd expression on your face. you pull away from his cock, a string of saliva breaking connections your tongue to his tip. before you could say anything — he grabs you by the waist, throwing you onto the bed but making sure to not hurt you. you yelp in surprise, quickly supporting yourself on your hands, looking back to see kai kissing your back. your breath hitches as his kisses slowly make its way to your ass. his hand creeps up into your underwear, his long fingers dipping inside of your drenched cunt. “you’re soaked,” he says, almost in a shocked tone.
“i’ve been thinking about you for so long,” you whimper out as he stretches out your pussy with his fingers. your vision starts getting blurry as he curls his fingers against the walls of your wet cunt. your back slightly arches when he pulls his fingers out. he slides off your panties, lining his tip up to the entrance. you turn your head forward, bracing yourself for the rough impact. you almost scream as his dick splits you open, feeling yourself tightening around his length. you cry out, muffling your moans by hiding your face in the sheets. he starts thrusting into you roughly, his hands on your waist. you squirm, curling your toes as he pounds into the walls of your pussy ruthlessly. “let me hear you, baby. c’mon i wanna hear your pretty little voice.” his voice low, laced with desire.
you grip onto the white sheets, tears drenching the thin covers under you. you moan out quietly, afraid that the other crew members would hear you getting your guts rearranged. the small room is filled with the sound of labored breathing, lewd moans, and skin slapping against each other. you melted into his touch, bouncing your ass against his cock to help him. you hear him whisper an “oh, yea.” behind you. he leans down to your back, his chest against you. he hugs you from behind, his hands massaging your plump breasts. “kai, please.” you beg when you realize he’s slowing down. “please what?” he teases in your ear. “let me cum, please.” he laughs, his breath tickling your neck. “be louder for me and i’ll let you.”
you groan at his response, but quickly arch your back against his chest when you feel him rubbing circles on your clit. you felt so dirty. he knows how much you wanted him now, how much you longed for this moment with him. you pant, your breathing stopping every once in awhile in response to his thick cock and skilled fingers. he fucks you into the mattress, spreading your ass with his hands to get a better view of his length sliding in and out of you. you turn your head back at him, staring at him with half lidded eyes. he laughs, keeping direct eye contact with you as he makes you chase your climax.
you can tell he’s about to cum again too. his thrusts start to get sloppier, inconsistent. you feel like a knots being tied in your core, being pulled on until it snaps. you gasp loudly, finally cumming together. your moans and his curses mix together. the wave from his cum painting your pussy makes you whimper. you swear you saw stars after you came. “fuck,” you mutter. your body feels limp as kai lays his chest on your back again, sighing into your skin. you can still feel his dick twitching inside of you. he peppers kisses against you before carefully pulling out. you shudder at the lost of contact. he plops down in the small bed, pulling you into his side. he places his head into the crook of your neck. “we should do this more,” he whispers slyly. you nod in response, his arms tightening around you as he kisses you one last time before drifting off to sleep.
