#wastrelwoods

[eternalgirlscout]

*slams gavel*

worm court is now in session

all writhe

[damienthepious]

AH I just remembered I had this thought anyway. someone in bouquet messes with some weird magic or fucks up an experiment and accidental bodyswap ensues... I thought u were the person to go to with that concept

have you been spying on myself and @shorter-than-her-tbr-pile because

this has been discussed

owo

we decided arum -> rilla’s body, rilla -> damien’s body, damien -> arum’s body, for maximum comedy and annoyance to all parties. Arum fucking CANNOT with the shortness and the softness and the lack of fucking limbs and sensory input, rilla is FURIOUS that she’s not the one with a chance to experience firsthand what it’s like to exist in a monster’s body For Science, and Damien is SO VERY CONFUSED. shenanigans. light angst. yes.

... i might actually write this sometime because in reminding me of this you’ve spurred my brain into finally generating a REASON why the bodyswap might happen

[gingeralewizard]

get you a lady who can do both
 art on the left by @commander-pigeon, art on the right by @wastrelwoods

[ernmark]

oh my GOD I just thought. AU. what if juno went on a Space Vegas bender to get over a bad relationship and woke up hungover and married to a pretty toothy criminal who accidentally signed his real name on the marriage license

It’s weird– I was sure I wrote a fic with this exact idea behind it, but I can’t find it. 

Huh.

It is entirely possible that I dreamed it, or that I’m misremembering someone else’s fic in a really weird way. 

The first thought through Peter’s head that morning: Aspirin.

No, that’s a lie. The first thought through his head is an inarticulate groan of pain that lasts for several minutes before he’s coherent enough to think in words. 

The first word is aspirin, though. 

Peter lurches over in bed to distance himself from the jagged spear of light that’s boring into his eyelids through a crack in the curtains. 

What was he thinking last night? And more to the point, what was he drinking?

It was… ugh, just trying to think back feels like rubbing sandpaper over his synapses. It was… he can’t remember the name, beyond “I’ll have what he’s having”, shortly after “a refill for the lady”. 

He remembers the lady in question: small, hard, and rough as an uncut gemstone; big sad eyes; a small, even sadder smile. It was lovely smile, though. 

Peter saw the first flash of it when he ordered the drink for himself; buying the lady a drink didn’t earn him so much as a glance in thanks, but “I’ll have what he’s having” got a huffed laugh and that small, sad smile.

“You sure about that?” he’d asked. “This stuff’s strong.”

And Peter had been sure it couldn’t be all that strong– after all, he’d seen the lady down… three? four? That part of the memory is too hazy for detail.  And besides, Peter was used to all sorts of liquors from all sorts of places. Surely it couldn’t be anything he hadn’t had before.

He was wrong.

He can still taste it on his tongue, as bitter and harsh as the acid they use to strip old paint off spaceships. It wasn’t any better last night. But the sight of him choking down that awful swill was enough to warrant a second smile from the lady, so he did it again. By the… was it the third? or the second? or the fifth? before he was too drunk to care. 

He doesn’t remember how the conversation turned between the empty tumblers– even at his worst, “what brings a girl like you to a place like this” is beneath him– but somehow the conversation turns to dashed hopes and unused wedding gowns, and somewhere along the line Peter had the lady by both shoulders and was telling him that the lady’s ex was a fool to let someone like him get away, that anyone would be lucky to find someone like him, that he would be honored to–

to–

Peter makes the mistake of sitting up in bed, and immediately crashes back down. His head feels like it’s being nailed to the pillow, but it’s not enough to wash away the bit of memory: he proposed to the lady. In the bar. When he could barely slide off his stool, let alone get down on one knee. 

Beside him, another body rolls over, groaning against the morning light. An arm gropes around him and then settles at his waist. On the third finger of the left hand is a ring– one of the crown jewels of the Third Cetan Dynasty, stolen from the royal museum barely a week ago. 

“Mmhh,” the lady groans in Peter’s ear, low enough that the murmur of his voice is soothing instead of painful. “’s too early.” 

Peter’s eyes go wide– another mistake– and he squeezes them shut again. The lady is in bed with him. That was… unexpected, but hardly outside of his repertoire. He can manage this. All he has to do is wait for this headache to fade, grab the ring, and get out of here before the lady wakes up. Simple enough. 

“It’s alright,” he murmurs back, just as softly. “Go back to sleep.” 

It’s simple. Perfectly simple. 

Right until the moment when the lady nuzzles into his hair with a sleepy hum. “Okay, Peter. Whatever you say.” 

And suddenly Peter Nureyev knows exactly how badly he’s fucked up.

[wolfythewitch]

Peter Nureyev! Based on Hold Me Fast and Fear Me Not by @wastrelwoods !

Dang, I remember now why I don’t use oil pastel.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

It’s great!!

(I had to skip a chapter tho haha, because of adult content, but it’s really good! The entire thing is so well written)

[acadieum]

ugh your lup,,,,is maybe my favorite....i lvoe this woman!!

THANK U!!! shgkjfd i love her sm....

[kalgalen]

if ur still takin those sweet sweet requests........u ever think about drawing. teen peter? little baby angel of brahma-era pete? my tiny sweet boy? i love ur art its A++

how long dyou think he wandered around new kanshasa with blood-stained clothes after everything went down

[elftwink]

wastrelwoods replied to your post “can i get a take from you all. whats the consensus on trans man peter...”

but god....i love that boy

wastrelwoods replied to your post “can i get a take from you all. whats the consensus on trans man peter...”

would absolutely love any and all of this content thats NOT disproportionately focused on emphasizing his femininity because im Tired of that

okay MOOD im so tired of feminine trans men in fan spaces bc its so... transparently transphobic but also that being said. i love to project also i love trans headcanons