#waverose

[lordelmelloi2]

Sometimes it's better to just leave Waver alone when he's in this mood

[dantespilled]

commission for @lordelmelloi2

thank you so much for commissioning and trusting me to draw them, roseee 🥺🥺😭😭💙💙💙

[waveroses]

The crux of the creation of waverose really was just me reading and reading and being incredibly mad that nobody was really like. There for him emotionally on a consistent basis. Like obviously yeah he has Melvin and yeah he has his students but 1) you can’t put the burden of emotional support on your students, that’s not appropriate 2) Melvin is really just one guy and he has limited things he can do... I wanted to like. Somehow put my feelings into Reality somehow. Not reality-reality but at least to conceptualize like what would it be like if I Was there for him and what would I say to him. How would I talk to him. What conversations would we have. How could I convey to him that I didn’t think what he was trying to prove was something he had to throw his life away for, how could I convey to him that there was something beyond living for the legacy of a 2300 year old man... how could I tell him that he was worth living because he was just an interesting person. How could I tell him that it was okay for him to just be himself, as Waver Velvet, and not as a Lord or as anyone’s retainer. I didn’t want him to keep holding himself up to that legacy because I know how crushing that can be when that’s all you have. I wanted to give him something more than that. I wanted to be there for him on a day-to-day basis and to listen to him and to talk to him and to comfort him and advise him when I notice him doing something that’s leading him down an ultimately self-destructive path. There’s no nobility in trying to prove that you weren’t worthy enough, or that you have to become worthy. And that man has long since left his mark on this earth in an incredible way. You don’t have to hold that on your shoulders. It’s meant as a courtesy. You are not the sole vassal of Alexander, the sole person who could know how he was and how he acts and how he is. Please trust me when I say that. <--- Something like that. I was just frustrated at the idea that his whole self-worth revolved around Alexander. His whole self revolved around Alexander. And Alexander is a dead man. He has been dead forever. He isn’t coming back. A lot of CF is about grieving and working through and accepting that fact. There are a lot of lessons about moving forward through pain and about looking at the bigger picture as well. I know Melvin is about to see that there is more to Waver than just the legacy of Alexander imparted onto him. I know Gray and the rest of his students can see it, too. I know Camus can see it as well. A lot of people can see it. To the point where people ask themselves “just what did he see in that war” when they see how heavily affected he is. 

I guess the big question is really just “what is right for Waver?” and I think that’s kind of missing the point too. Sometimes to be considerate of somebody’s emotions, you have to like... look at the bigger picture. If I have a friend who does something that is leading down a self-destructive path I will gently try to nudge them into a direction that doesn’t end with their sense of self or self-worth eroding or leading to their death or potential injury. When I was reading Case Files, I started getting really really worried about how this was adding up. It’s one thing to honor somebody who had an impact in your life for the better. It’s another thing to become consumed by it. I didn’t think that Waver was doing more honoring than obsessing. Judging from his state of affairs it seemed like he wasn’t taking good care of himself, either. Then there’s the flashbacks he has. The way he talks about himself in general, his lack of self-worth, his sense of innate guilt for existing the way he does. The fact that he knows and we know that if he joined another Grail War, he would likely get killed, and part of that was what his goal was. So there was no way that with all of that plus the way he talked and acted about Alexander I felt like that he was handling it in a healthy way. 

I wanted to be able to stand in front of him with my own two feet and tell him that I cared about him as a person, not as a vassal, not as anything else. Just as him. That’s really all I wanted. So that’s why I started writing and creating things about that. I just wanted to have the chance to tell him things personally. Whether we argued, whether he hated me, whether he grew to love me or not, I just needed to somehow be there for him, in some capacity. I wanted to try. Of course because I control the narrative I can say “well he ended up liking me and blah blah blah” but in Most of my writing the point isn’t so much That as much as it’s “I just wish you could see what I see in you, what makes you such a wonderful person to be around”. I couldn’t stand the idea of him being alone and feeling like nobody could ever understand him or what he went through as a whole. 

[lordelmelloi2]

I'm on time with another terrible comic for Waver Wednesday

[lordelmelloi2]

This fucking guy

[lordelmelloi2]

Some wavers + waveroses I doodles recently

UM you can see a little bit in the corner but I saw an illustration and liked it so much I wanted to draw Waver like it so I did.

weird guy

I couldn't remember what the rest of the expressions were for this comic so I never finished it

LOL you'll never be able to guess what he's saying in rosesona's ear

waverose hug is so crucial

🫠 coping

I love his face so much I love his hopeless expressions I want to kiss him

[lordelmelloi2]

I SEE THE VOTES ON THAT POST okay fine whatever. extremely indulgent waver on my lap pov shot that had turned into a values study under the cut. slightly nsfw and extremely evil

[lordelmelloi2]

mastersonaposting + waveroses + rosekamakiara post. I hope this explains Rosesona's insane brand of masochism