Im rotating and pondering Marya in my mind, she was once a young fresh pilot Comfrey took under her wing and took a chance on her to be the captain. And so of Course when she meets the young talented Ludmilla shes going to do the same thing! Let her be the captain help her grow, and then a horrible accident occurs (that is somehow preordained to happen because for it happen Ludmilla must be taken and Straka controlled and Straka takes her under her control) and Comfrey saves Marya because that is Her protégé that is her sky eyed kid.........so of course she abandons everything to save her. And Marya is wanting to save Her sky eyed protégé, so now she cant just blame Comfrey she has to blame herself as well. And then she gives up on blaming Comfrey because nothing will change, but she cant give up her own blame for the same reason. And she meets The Queen of Zern Ludmilla, and she sees what happens, and she learns Ludmilla waited for her, and waited, and waited, and the door she waited by became Straka because Marya never came to save her. And all of this! And Marya still just wants to save Ludmilla, she wants to save her Mila