“ have you forgotten your station, sir ikkon? ” he yanks himself away from the knight, but finally being forced to turn around and face his own guard. there is no more place to run, except to dimension door away. but that will be more cowardice than loras is willing to show. so he turns and stares back into the other elf's accusatory face. “ then allow me to remind you why we are here. you are a knight and i am your charge, but this is not what we want – you want to be the first knight of avalir, and i a member of the septarion. that's what we want from each other. that's all we want from each other. anything else is just ... ”
he inhales, searches for his words, feeling himself struggling, fighting to pull away. like a wayward adventurer running out of an enchanted forest. away and away from every lingering touches like grasping vines, playful glances the dazzling starlight; from the too close distance, baited breath, and a gambled kiss. it was all –
“ – a distraction . ” loras lets out that breath, and knows he has been betrayed. he trains his heart to be unfaithful, to those around him, and in this moment to himself most of all. a numbness washes over loras' face. he cocks his head as if to pull back any lingering emotions he couldn't tuck away in time. “ ... it's been a fine and refreshing trip, given the circumstances. and i have you to thank for it. but that's just what it is. a trip. ... now it's time to go home. ”
there is speechless anger simmering under ikkon's gaze when loras twists away from him. he has backed the wizard into a corner -- they were of a height with each other, but loras couldn't hope to contest ikkon in a feat of strength.
a distraction. the words turn the anger into a fury roiling under his skin. just a distraction, those weeks of wandering together, of stolen evenings of just the two of them.
his mind pulls at the thought of loras with laughter caught in his teeth and there is a tension that grinds ikkon's teeth.
" might i remind you that this position as sentinel was in lieu of becoming first knight? that you and i have known for far longer than either would be willing to admit that the title i so desperately wished for will never be mine? it was your word that told me becoming your sentinel would replace this far off dream. "
ikkon scoffs as he says it, steps back just an inch or so from being in loras's space, and waves his hand out to the city beyond. how foolish was he to believe in any of this.
there's the briefest flash of hurt across his face before it's swallowed once more by rage.
" i know those around you are loathe to tell as such to your face, but you're a coward, loras. no wonder you hide behind your masks and dangle such things in front of those who would offer you something genuine -- only for you to slap it from their hands and call it a distraction. "

















