#welcometotarghetto

[welcometotarghetto-blog]

The Resurrection of Crack Jesus

Our store is one of the few stores downtown that has an open, public restroom.  That being said, we have high traffic of the shadiest people that use our facilities.  This normally entails with guests shooting up in the stalls, or cooking meth. Classy, right?  Well, a month ago, we had a guest overdose in the bathroom. Like, she died. Luckily for her, one of our store engineers is trained in CPR and resuscitated her. She then stumbled out the store to the EMTs, barely clothed and looking quite "dead". And that was the day that Crack Jesus rose from the stall. #welcometotarghetto #nextguest

[welcometotarghetto-blog]

The Misadventures of Grandma Ke$ha

So. We have this one guest that comes in all the time, and I swear she looks like a 60 year old Ke$ha. No joke. She wears these neon tights and jackets, all while looking like a hot mess. Did I mention that she has glitter caked to her eyes? Not like a little, no, like she could cry streams of glitter. Anyways. So, for a while I hadn't seen her, and I was kind of worried if something had happened to her (like her waking up feeling like Bill Cosby or something, idk) and then yesterday there she was, trail of glitter behind her. Don't stop Grandma Ke$ha.