#will's journal

[will-grahamofficial]

Those I have found.

(a piece of paper has fallen loose from Will's Journal...)

{Not of my world}:

@1nvictus

Nigel Banyai. I don't know what his motivations are, but he seems content to hang around this website like so much smoke (as well as my inbox).

@littlebabybugz

Not my child, but that of another Will's and...someone else. Too young to be considered threatening in any way, but those genes will most likely crop up someday.

@littlelonelyfox

Another child of destruction, though at least this time it's not mine. A bright girl. Seems more threatening than Christophe, but hasn't found her teeth yet, I don't think.

@lecthannibal

We've spoken briefly, enough to gauge that he's nothing like the Hannibal I know. Will approach with extreme caution in the future.

@hannibalrp250

His advice tracks with what I would expect to hear from my own Hannibal. His charisma makes it so many seek it.

{Of my world}:

@hannibal-lecter-offical

The Hannibal that I know. Just as pretentious, twice as grand.

@dear-drlecter

Also the Hannibal I know. Is convinced that he is just that, my Hannibal. We'll see about that.

@zellerrp01

We haven't spoken much, but it's every bit the Bryan I'm familiar with.

[will-grahamofficial]

Day 5

Mushrooms. I used to like them. But they way this killer "prepares" them makes my skin crawl.

Maybe it wasn't very clever of me to threaten Freddie Lounds but she had it coming. She's been rooting around too many places she shouldn't be, and the day will come when she crawls down a journalistic rabbit hole and never comes back up.

...Which would be a shame. I'm not...saying I want that for her. Of course not.

Dr. Lecter told me he had sauteed mushrooms with steak yesterday for dinner. Of course.

Abigail still sleeps, though I doubt she rests. I've been sleeping fine.

[will-grahamofficial]

Day 11

Georgia had no idea who she was, who her friends were, her family...she didn't even know if she was alive or dead. Living in terror. Sometimes I don't know if I'm alive or dead. I'm at least glad we were able to find her.

My condition, whatever it is, is getting worse. Hannibal took me for tests but it said I was physically fine. I'm not crazy, though, I know I'm not. I'm not.

[will-grahamofficial]

Day 11

All I can hear is sounds for days now. Which is redundant. But there's no other word for the noises Tobias Budge made with that human cello. I can't call it music. I couldn't bring myself to call it music.

I swear I heard something in my chimney. Alana said it was a raccoon, but I know better. Alana. She's always trying to make things more normal. Stable. Probably why she didn't want...me. Everything that comes with me.

Hannibal was once again put in danger. It might not technically be through my fault, but...he doesn't belong here. In this world. Neither does Alana. I should stop being selfish.

[will-grahamofficial]

Day 10

Medical and personal. The Chesapeake Ripper and the surgeon. I know why Jack wanted this one to be the Ripper so badly. I can relate to it, but unlike Jack, I don't let my passion cloud my eyes.

Devon Silvestri, like Dr. Gideon, is no Chesapeake Ripper. He does, however, share the Ripper's likely profession; something with anatomical knowledge. That's where the similarity ends.

Hannibal seems to involve himself in both sides of my life, no matter how hard I try to keep him separate. Again he was put into the position to save the life of the victim in the back of that ambulance. I don't think a bottle of wine was enough to show my gratitude.

[will-grahamofficial]

Day 7? 8?

I probably have had too much to drink, but I can't stop thinking about what kind of damage that leaves you...brainwashed to kill your family, your mother. The levels of depravity you have to contain to be the ringleader of such a sick carnival.

Loneliness can become something terrible, I know. As can love.

I hear Hannibal has been taking Abigail on outings from the hospital. I haven't seen her yet.

I just can't get it out of my head. I've known loneliness, pain, that deep ache. I've never ached so much I would manufacture a fake family to soothe it.

I haven't really been sleeping.

[will-grahamofficial]

Day who-knows-anymore

We fell. Together, off the cliff. The blood of the Great Red Dragon cooling on our skin. Our skin. A fitting end.

And it would have been, and yet we are still alive. I don't know if I should kill him in his sleep or not. I'm definitely too tired to succeed there, but maybe he would appreciate the sentiment. Smile at me through cracked lips.

We lived, but we're injured. I might even be dying. He's worried about me. I don't know what to do with that information either.

I would say this is my final entry but I'm not sure of the future. Of anything anymore.