Season 3, Reel 3: November 26, 1953
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Amy, do you know anything about declawing cats? I know that a lot of people do it, but I don’t know if it’s, well, humane. Do you know if there have been studies of this kind of thing? Can you do some research and find out how this affects cats. I don’t know how people would even begin to understand whether and when cats are happy, apart from the purring and lap-cuddling, but can you see if they have… Can you see if they know whether declawing makes them unhappy? Obviously Vivi and I don’t wanna make a living creature that is in our care unhappy but, well, there’s been some damage to tapestry. To an antique tapestry that was rescued from Belgium during the Reckoning, when most works of art were lost. So… I don’t know that there is a good way to decide which is more important: a rare preserve of the world we lost or the happiness of a living creature that is in your care. Still, some studies would help. If you could look into studies on the well-being of declawed cats, Amy, that would be helpful.
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Goddammit, Amy, where have you put today’s papers? Papers first thing, god, and turn that fucking music off! [music stops]
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Letter from the office of Michael Witten on the 26th of November 1953 to Sarah Chisholm, Public Works Department, Philadelphia office.
Dear Sarah. I wanted to get in touch again about my plans regarding the currently abandoned government buildings in Washington. I have been consulting with contractors both local to me and to the buildings - as local as you can get, obviously, as regards the buildings – and pulled together some details and some quotes about what we can accomplish. It looks likely that some parts of the plan, and I’m sure you will be able to predict which, may have to be delayed for a while, but I think we can get going on the foundational things within the next few weeks. As we discussed when I first outlined it to you, I have not spoken to many people about this plan, nor have I obtained clearance from the s`Societal Council. The buildings we’re looking at altering, although they are abandoned and in some cases ruins, they’re still some of the most important buildings on this continent. While they no longer have any place in our society in the symbolic sense they once did, there’s still a great deal of emotional attachment to them, so we must be careful how we communicate our intentions for them. We’re not allowed to have national capitals anymore, so refashioning or restoring from our government buildings, particularly the White House and Capitol, touches some nerves. We will have to let people come to the correct conclusion, that is the conclusion we have both arrived at, that we mut override the nationalist importance of old buildings and remake them for new, practical uses today.
This is why the plans we developed focused entirely on public housing, doctors’ offices, artistic studeos, and store fronts. My wife Vivian suggested that we add theaters and dance bases as well. I can get rough sketches of those designs to you if you’re interested. I remain impressed with the work you’ve done in Philadelphia to maintain the Walnut Street theater. We must show the public as well as the Societal Council that there’s a way to both use such buildings for the good of our new society and remember them as the architectural triumphs they are from the past, while also erasing their patriotic significance.
It’s been suggested to me by my more artistically minded friends that the Capitol building is neo-classical regurgitation, that it has no architectural significance, but that’s not how history works, you can’t just erase it. You have to embrace it and learn from it, and know that what is unfashionable today will be fashionable again later. National patriotism is anathema to our rebuilding efforts, and we have to move beyond it, but we cannot deny the atrocities and the violence committed by our forbearers. Nor can we sterilize our past and keep it safely in a jar on a shelf. If we can reclaim that dome and those buttresses to mean something other than the quote “United States of America”, we can not only acknowledge our past, but reshape the future, it’s so poorly intended.
I don’t expect that this will be easy to sell, Sarah, which is why we should be careful about who we tell now. I’m all for acting now and untangling red tape later. But I believe we should think about how we can make announcements soon. Since the area around these buildings is unpopulated, we can begin work before we announce, I think. No one will be there to see it. But we don’t wanna leave it too long. We don’t want it to look like we’re keeping secrets.
I have to say, Sarah, after all this time talking and thinking, I’m excited to be getting close to the point of beginning. There are parts of this job that feel like mitigating or alleviating destruction but occasionally, something comes along that reminds you that it is really just creation. Creation borne out of destruction, yes, but creation nonetheless. I’m sorry for getting sentimental. It’s an emotional time.
I look forward to celebrating with you in person when you visit Chicago next month. Kind regards, Michael.
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Amy, never mind about the papers, I found them. They were under all this paperwork from doctor Woods’ office. Thanks for revising the pregnancy contracts, but always keep the newspapers on top.
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Shit! Shit, Amy!
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Amy, why didn’t you tell me about the papers as soon as I came in? I assume you saw them. I assume that, even though you covered them up with a bunch of hospital paperwork, as if that’s the most important thing. Fuck! Shit, Amy, I dunno what to do! How did they find out? Why did they write this up without asking me for comment? What is going.. Amy, don’t send that letter to Sarah obviously. I’ll have to write another one, or you will. Sorry, I recorded all things on the same reel, hope it didn’t take you too long. What the fuck am I going to say?
Also, did you know about these stories ahead of time? You didn’t, did you? Had you heard anything? You better not have heard anything and not brought it directly to my attention, Amy, I swear to God. From now on, read the papers first before you bring them to me. You’ll need to come in earlier for that.
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How did they find out? There’s only two people in our office and I sure as fuck didn’t say anything.
[tape recorder turns off] [ads] [tape recorder turns on]
Amy, deliver this memo immediately. From the office of Michael Witten on the 26th of November 1953, to Reina Bachelor, PR Department, Chicago office.
Dear Raina. There have been some stories printed in today’s papers - I’ve seem them in The Post and The Tribune, I’m not sure if they’re elsewhere as well - that concern this department. I’m hoping you can help me with them. The stories specifically mention this department and myself and discuss, with surprising detail, some undisclosed plans for renovations in Washington, or schemes as The Post put it. I was not contacted for comment by journalists, and many of the details have been misconstrued and in most cases reported incorrectly. It is crucial that we get on top of this story as soon as possible to correct the misinformation that is being spread. Please contact my secretary Amy Castillo to set up a management team meeting this week.
I know this will be difficult, lies run faster than the truth, and I would like you to devote as much effort and resource as you can spare in the attempt. Please prepare a statement for immediate release and advice me on your media strategy.
Kind regards, Michael.
If this gets in the way of things I just… [pause]
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OK, Amy. New letter from the office of Michael Witten on the 26th of November 1935 to Sarah Chisholm, Public Works Department, Philadelphia office.
Dear Sarah, I’m assuming you will have seen the stories in the papers recently. It seems someone found out about our plans and leaked them, or at least leaked some version of them to the press. They have almost everything wrong. The Chicago Tribune says we’re rebuilding a national capital in Washington, and the Washington Post claims that we will reinstate American agencies, and unlike The New York Times, they seem thrilled about it.
[long pause] But even if the headlines are completely misleading, the bulk of the facts are correct. There were a couple of government offices in these reconstruction plans, but they’re for administrative purposes. These buildings weren’t reviving the American capital, they’re for public good with just one or two small offices for minor paperwork and local management. You can’t have public housing and then place the agency in charge of it across town. It’s a few square feet in each building. It’s not a goddamn renaissance of American chauvinism. Don’t say goddamn. We are now being accused of both revitalizing nationalism and destroying cultural history, which would be laughable if these papers didn’t hold the power to derail all of our plans.
I’m consulting with our PR department, obviously, as I think it’s crucial that we change the narrative around this as soon as possible. It’s going to be so much harder now. Talk to your publicity team in Philadelphia. I think, no no, it is imperative we work together to snuff out this oversensitivity. The secrecy is obviously not an issue anymore.
My current plan is this. [sighs], Amy, what is my plan? I’m just reacting to all this, I don’t have a plan to deal with this. plan, my plan, uh…
We will have to explain why a public announcement was not made swiftly. I think we are best off saying that we decided to confirm all the details before we announced, rather than pester people with constant updates about something that to all intents and purposes wouldn’t affect them. Play it off as no big deal. I mean, we have the plans I sent you, there’s nothing to hide from. There will be more back and forth once the statement goes out, I’m sure, people appear to have a lot of thoughts and opinions about this. and while it is useless to try and assuage all doubts, I think we are honor bound to address at least some of the more common concerns as they arise.
In the long term, it is my opinion that we need to start planning a serious ongoing public awareness campaign, one that stretches even beyond our current plan to encompass an ideology around dealing with similar situations going forward. We can frame this as one in a long string of moments in which we, as a society, decide who we are and how we relate to the past. It will take some time and effort to convince people of the correctness of our plans for these buildings, and bringing them into the context of a wider idea for the world as a whole could help with that. We are gonna have to do a lot more work in the early stages than we had hoped. We’ll have to manage people’s expectations as well as manage the actual work.
I’m not sure who within our collective teams is completely behind this, but I will try to make inquiries, to rally support within the government. With our luck, the current outcry will only be a blip on the way to greater understanding of our goals.
Kind regards, Michael.
Fuck!
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Amy, I’m sure you’ve typed the memo up already, but forget it. Just get Raina on the phone for me. I want her ass in my office ASAP, I’ll just tell her this in person.
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I’m sorry I snapped a bit before. I wasn’t expecting this today, it threw me off balance a bit and I became slightly unreasonable. I want you to know that I appreciate your work and your discretion in this, as I do in all things. I’m sorry if I made you believe I doubted your loyalty even for a moment. I’m sure that made this day almost as stressful for you as it has been for me.
Amy, I need you to do a little investigating for me. If the public turns the Societal Counci in opposition to my plan for Washington, I’m hoping there will be people willing to stand beside me, uh besides Vishwati, and persuading them into agreement. Of course, we could go ahead with the plan without their blessing, but it would be unwise, I think. We are still living in unstable and unpredictable times, and peace must be maintained at all costs.
No, it would be dangerous to proceed if too many people do not approve. So it is very important I know how my colleagues feel about this and who I can rely on. If you can find out, probably just from the other secretaries, how I am regarded and whether the plan has support and from whom, I would appreciate that. It will be fine, of course. I shall speak to Vishwati, I’m sure she has seen the papers and is already eager to be of help. She’s the fixer. Even journalists are in awe of her. The hard part is telling her I’ve, we’ve, I’ve fucked up. But the newspapers solved that problem. I just need to tell her what I think needs to be done and she’ll do it. She’s always looking for solutions, not excuses. Solutions, yes.
Amy, contact Vishwati Ramadoss’ office and see when she will be free to take a call. It’ll have to be a rather long one, so make sure there’s no danger of her being called away to a meeting midway through.
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By the way, Amy, as well as declawing, are you able to look into the causes of hairballs in cats? Is there a way to discourage them happening at all? Something about how you feed the cat or maybe controlling how they clean themselves? I suspect it’s one of the things that you juts have to live with, isn’t it? Well, Vivi has fallen in love with the thing so there’s no hope for it, but one can only clean a rug so many times before it becomes quite a different rug.
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I need a drink. Amy, join me around 4. I’ve opened some bourbon. Knock first, though. [long silence]
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Within the Wires is a production of Night Vale Presents. It is written by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson with original music by Mary Epworth. Find more of Mary’s music at maryepworth.com. The voice of Michael Witten is Lee LeBreton. You can support our show and get exclusive episodes and other cool things at patreon.com/withinthewires.
OK, our time is done. It’s you time now. Time to head to happy hour after a long day of work at the [bird factory], to enjoy a pint of [bacon fat] with your friend [Benicio del Toro].