#wolver writes

[wolvereaux]

yeehaw bus time!

[wolvereaux]

Shout into the Void

It's been twelve years and three months since we last said goodbye.

Twelve years and three months since I moved across the country, thinking that because I knew where you lived I would always have your address. That even if I forgot the street name and the house number, I knew the way to your house from the park we played at when we were little.

I thought of you today and looked up the park, the playground still there all the same (just more worn), and I have no recollection of where to go from there.

I remember trading plastic horses and telling tall tales, running around in my backyard and in the powerline field with our siblings. We were everything from unicorns to Jedi to creatures with magic we invented on the fly.

I remember you telling me about the bread maker that walked itself off the counter and met its untimely end of the floor. I laughed so hard that I cried; it was probably the only time I had something to laugh about that week or that month.

I remember when my parent wrecked the car in Lansing, hours away from home, and we got to hang out all day after while the grownups were away dealing with insurance and towing companies. That was the first and only time I ever played a Sonic game, because my parents weren't there to ban it.

I remember you were working on a story about a girl and a dragon that both had purple eyes, and wanting to know how it would go when you figured out the ending. I still wonder, sometimes.

You were the bright spot of normality in my childhood, and I miss you.

I hope you made it out okay.

I did - eventually.

(I miss you).

[wolvereaux]

I have work at early o' clock and will be going to bed at my normal time, but I have two thoughts to send out into the void nonetheless.

Guilt and anxiety are not the price you pay for existing.

In this bullshit capitalist hellscape, being kind to yourself is a radical act of rebellion.

It's chaos out there. Go forth, be punk, and be gentle to yourselves <3

[wolvereaux]

I love when my meat brain floods me with dark despair of the soul when we're JUST. HUNGRY.

Why can't we have normal hungry INSTEAD, BRAIN?!?!

[wolvereaux]

while no amount of snacks can fix things like financial instability, sometimes you just gotta have a juice box about it and afterwards you'll feel a bit better

[wolvereaux]

I forgot I meant to maintain my undercut this time

UUUUUUUGHH

[wolvereaux]

ngl, its been a pretty shitty last week and a half.

My glasses broke, I got a real bad cold that I'm still recovering from (not COVID at least), I wrekt both my ankle and my knee from tripping on gravel (not to mention the rest of my body from compensating for the injuries), RSD raised its ugly head because I've had to miss several work days to heal, and I found out that my sister and her roommate got the plague.

Very, very rough ten days or so.

BUT.

Tonight I offhandedly mentioned to my youngest bio bro that my current laptop is dying and that I need to buy a replacement. Turns out he just bought himself a replacement for an older gaming laptop our other bio brother handed down to him after getting his own replacement, and both brothers agreed that it's my turn on the hand-me-down gaming laptop.

Now, it is older and has some minor issues (overheated a few times and needs two keys replaced), but it's a MASSIVE upgrade essentially for free.

And if THAT wasn't cool enough, youngest bio bro ordered me a cool tee shirt and is sending it with the laptop.

I could cry.

[wolvereaux]

I love finding out at FOUR AM that the reason I can't sleep is because I'm HUNGRY and my body didn't bother to tell me until it was FOUR AM