#worthkept

[somegremlin-archive3]

@worthkept​ asked: “ are you listening to me?”

*: ･ﾟ✧   alexander mahone quotes, part one.

「 ★ 」   ⋮    Ａ Ｎ Ａ Ｔ Ｈ Ｅ Ｍ Ａ．   ⋮  ━━ EMOTIONS run deep; far deeper than any wound they were ever forced to take in. Such sickening feelings of jealousy, anger, hatred … feelings all stemming from the betrayal of a single man plagued them day and night. How could this boy ever understand what they felt ? How could they ever even begin to COMPREHEND the pain they felt when the boy was so lavished with LOVE ? Simple, he couldn’t. There was no way this boy would understand. 

                 So why should they even consider LISTENING ? 

                Rather than give any sort of REASONABLE response, the child merely gives them that same EERIE smile from before.

                ‘ Why should I ? A dummy like you doesn’t know ANYTHING ! No wonder Dazai - san likes you so much. You’re both STUPID. ‘

[deathsanction]

worthkept said:“ i will never turn my back on people who need me. ” hero / villain sentence starters: ACCEPTING

  ‘  A shepherd should not abandon his flock. But there are times upon which sacrifices have to be made for the greater good. Is it best to risk the whole flock to save one sheep, or save the rest of the flock?  ‘

   Fyodor looked entirely calm despite the situation he was in. He had no reason to fear or worry in such a situation as this, though many others certainly would have.  It was proceeding as he expected thus far, so he would keep following what he had predicted.

   ‘  Turn your back or do not, but you will not win regardless.  ‘  Purple eyes open with a cold, intense look to them when he gazes at Atsushi.  

[devourspace]

“i made you some soup, and i’m going to sit here until you eat it. i can wait.”

[ caring for stubborn muses. ]

                                  “ you’re too stubborn. ” akutagawa was in no position to argue, laid up in a bed at atsushi’s place. he had fallen ill after a mission. he only had minor scratches from the enemy, someone laughably weak, but after they took care of it, their breath became labored and they collapsed. he couldn’t remember feeling this sick since he was a child. overwork, and the air quality when they were fighting probably caused it. he hated feeling weak.

                                         knowing that the odds were stacked against them, they decided to suck it up and eat the soup. they really weren’t hungry; the feeling in his chest made him nauseous, but he knew atsushi wouldn’t give up until akutagawa ate a suitable amount. they took it a sip at a time, eating what he could. the warmth of the soup eased some of the tightness in his chest. still, they put their spoon down to cover up the coughs they couldn’t hold back. at least they weren’t bloody yet. they leaned back against the headboard. they hated feeling so helpless. he wanted to be alone, so he wouldn’t have to be humiliated like this. “ i ... ” they didn’t want to admit defeat, even if not accepting any more food technically would mean he won the argument. “ this is enough ... jinko. ”

[devourspace]

“you’re gonna hurt yourself even more if you do stupid things like that!”

[ caring for stubborn muses. ] 

                                     akutagawa whipped his head around to glare at atsushi. “ you’re one to talk, jinko, throwing yourself in the middle of danger like it’s your hobby. ” it wasn’t like atsushi was really concerned. not like it mattered what the reason was. he was tired of people barking orders at him when they weren’t even involved with him. they much preferred working alone. but they had to put up with atsushi, because, for some reason, dazai thought this was a good idea. and he needed dazai’s approval in order to have a reason to keep living.

                                            “ i can handle myself. i don’t need you hovering over me. ” even if they were partnered up more often, they didn’t need a babysitter. they preferred a partner that was strong enough to stand on their own and wouldn’t interfere with their fighting style. they weren’t suited for teamwork at all, really.  

[devourspace]

“at least let me clean the wound!”

                                    his wound did need to be cleaned, but he didn’t have to clean it right now. he’d rather wait until he was back home, away from anyone else’s prying eyes. especially the weretiger’s. akutagawa didn’t care what people thought of him, but atsushi’s scrutinizing gaze was like knives to his heart. he didn’t care if atsushi hated him, but he hated that atsushi thought he was weak. that he and dazai were standing on their moral highground ( as if they had any ) and laughing at him. he hated even more, when after all of that, the weretiger would show him any ounce of pity.

                                         “ it can wait. ” akutagawa pulled his leg back and forced himself to stand. his clothes brushing against his wound caused a sharp intake of breath, but he walked ahead regardless. he could ignore it. he’d been through worse. “ you don’t need to look at me any longer, jinko. go home. ”

[devourspace]

“listen, asshole. i’m gonna carry you home whether you like it or not. you’re not in any condition to get there yourself.”

                                    akutagawa had put themself right in the line of fire and got injured again. their way of fighting was aggressive, but it worked for them. the only reason they held back now was because of the promise to the weretiger. if they had just been able to kill their enemy, it wouldn’t have been a problem. but now they were undergoing a complete lifestyle change. they weren’t used to holding back, so they ended up getting hurt. 

                                           “ i can walk by myself. i can do that much. ” they glared at atsushi, ignoring how their injuries stung and their body ached. that was easy to deal with compared to the injuries their pride was taking right now. “ put me down before i make you. ”

[deathsanction]

worthkept said: 8 + 21! character solidifying questions: ACCEPTING

8. How does your character feel about religion? 

Fyodor is an extremely, extremely religious person. He, even despite making himself a god in a godless world, is also an actively religious person. Specifically of the Russian Orthodox faith. It motivates much of what he does, and he makes sure to always have time to indulge in his faith as possible (considering his plans, sometimes it is not always possible to make time as he would like.) To him, religion is an extremely important aspect of life, and he can’t fathom a life without it. His faith is taken to an extreme point, while also mixing with his own genuine ideas of granting salvation by killing ability users. It’s certainly a twisted and messed up mindset, but Fyodor is unshakable in this belief. 

This is a question that could go many, many different routes. So if there’s a particular aspect of religion you’d like to know his perspective or mindset on, feel free to send those in!

21. What are your character’s manners like? What is their type of hero? Whom do they hate?

In church or holy spaces, his manners are impeccable. He takes such holy spaces very seriously and to treat them with the respect they deserve. Fyodor also follows fairly common etiquette. (I.E. removing shoes before entering a house, being punctual, offering space to children & pregnant women.) Obviously however, he avoids any contact or interaction as much as possible with people and often does not interact with anyone outside the other rats and angels unless people are involved in a plan. Being as he is an extremely manipulative plan, if he has you as a target, he’s going to be intent on that. It typically involves a lot of eye contact,as if he’s picking apart someone’s very soul.

Fyodor has no heroes. Unless God counts. Who do they hate? Dazai. For someone who so desperately wishes to die, he has a nasty habit of staying alive. But it’s a complicated situation with Dazai as it’s also someone who can keep up with him. Who he truly hates, and I mentioned in my other hc post, is his father and grandparents. No one can top his hatred of them, not even Dazai. 

[devourspace]

when i was a child my nerves ran wild.

                                  because of fitzgerald’s arrogance, and the time they had spent in atsushi’s presence, they had an idea of just how painful atsushi’s past was. this wasn’t the first time that akutagawa and atsushi had opened tiny facets of themselves to each other, but it was the first time it had happened without some sort of violent, life-threatening incident prefacing it. akutagawa really was no good in these situations, especially not with their self-proclaimed enemy. “ you’re not so different now. ” akutagawa could recall times where atsushi questioned everything akutagawa out of an offense to his ideals or just plain fear. atsushi’s nature grew from the abuse of the mentor who was supposed to take care of him. but atsushi wasn’t a kid anymore. he thought he was that kid, but he wasn’t. if only he could see that.

                                        “ now, even when you’re terrified, you choose to fight instead of run away. you’re reckless. ” they refrained from the word foolish; atsushi was beating himself up enough as it was. ( why did they care so much? ) they bristled a bit before adding, “ ... that’s not always a bad thing. ”