#wtflanguage

[thepanmermaid2002]

French is when you have to say every letter but they’re all silent.

[nambnb]

German food guide for DMMd-fanfiction-writers

Attention: This is just from a middle class standard, Noiz is high class and might dine differently, since he simply has a shitload of money to spend on food and his upbringing might make his taste differ. Plus, it might vary with the region of Germany you live in (since I live in the Eastern part, that’s only what I know).

Breakfast

There are more or less 3 types: - 1: No breakfast, just coffee (breakfast is taken in during morning break at the company) - 2: breakfast consisting of bread, and/or bread buns and toppings - 3: breakfast consisting of cornflakes/muesli/cereals Either one might be combined with cups of coffee or tea of either blend/sort, alternatively some people might drink a glass of (freshly squeezed) juice.

- Type 2 breakfast: Basically, you put stuff on top of other stuff. The base can be bread in whichever sort you'd like, most people go with mixed wheat and rye bread or white bread (for sweet toppings), but you can go with dark rye bread (for sour or harsh or salty toppings), too. Some people like toast (white toast or whole grain toast), others like bread buns (whichever sort). Less common but liked, too, are croissants (sweet toppings).

The things to put on top of your base vary from person to person, a lot of people like it sweet and others more hearty - it's possible that women prefer sweet stuff and men the more hearty breakfast, but in the end it's a matter of taste, really.

Sweet things to offer can consist of: jam (whatever flavour, most common is strawberry, peach, cherry and plum), honey (the spreadable version, it's smooth and thick; whichever flavour you like it to be, most common is probably blossom honey), hazelnut spread (if you wrote "Nutella", everybody would know what you mean, but it would be quite the marketing thingy XD),

Sour/harsh/salty stuff to put on top: cheese (sliced cheese of whatever sort), cream cheese (whichever sort, common is the creamy version or the one with chives in it), wurst (oh hey, take your pick it's a huge category; how about ham, salami, liverwurst, tea sausage spread or blood sausage). Additional things to add on top of the toppings or to eat as side-dish: slices of tomato, cucumber or onion (not that common with breakfast, though, due to lasting bad breath), a boiled egg.

- Type 3 breakfast: Cornflakes, muesli or cereals might be added to the bread and topping breakfast, if they are served in a small bowl, or might stand as breakfast on their own. You either put cornflakes and muesli together, or you eat them separately. Muesli is more or less oatmeal with other types of grains or dried fruits (raisins, banana or strawberry for example). Cornflakes, well... you know what these are, they come in different types and flavours. In the end you pour milk on all of them, or eat them with yogurt.

Lunch

Oh hey, no, you can eat whatever you like here. There are various German dishes, but there are so many others you cannot really make a mistake in whatever you choose here, might it be Italian, French, American or whichever cuisine (if it's not exclusively done in your country only that is). As a general direction Germans like dishes accompanied by meat (mostly chicken, pork or beef) - aside from the vegetarians among us of course. The most common side dishes are potatoes in all variations (boiled, mashed, fried, croquettes) and pasta (most often spaghetti, but it can be pretty much any sort) or rice (long grain rice).

Coffee and cake

This is something eaten between 3 p. m. and 5 p. m. and consists of coffee or tea accompanied by a slice of cake or pie and lots of jabbering. It's mostly common for the older generation to enjoy at home and is probably impossible when working in a company, since the timing is bad. Can be a Sunday-thingy only, too. Might be something your parents invite you over for.

Dinner

Some people like eating a hearty dinner that's pretty much comparable to lunch, but I guess the most common variant would be the same as a breakfast consisting of bread, maybe bread buns and toppings, with the difference that it's common to only use sour/harsh/salty stuff to put on top as listed above. Have some beer (whichever sort), tea or coffee accompanying it if you like.

Now for the hardcore writers among you who want to actually use German words in their fanfic describing food.

We have gender orientated articles over here. The definite article would be covered with "the" in English, but are divided into "der" (male), "die" (female) and "das" (neuter). The indefinite article covered by the English "a" or "an" would be "ein" (male), "eine" (female). There are no real rules when to use which article, you have to memorize them, it's that horrible a language. Then there are the so called "Umlaute" (umlauts) ä, ö, ü, you can write them without the dots, too, if you use: ae, oe and ue. If you were to try speaking them then "ä" would sound like the "e" in "errand", "ö" is like...... it's kinda similar to the "eu" in "in lieu" and "ü" is like "y" in "yttrium" (at least if the sound file how this is spoken is not lying to me). We do use a letter called "Eszett" that's written "ß", it's simply a sharply spoken, hissing-like "s"-sound. It might be substituted with a double "ss", but not in every situation. Below you'll find a short list of German food stuff. Be aware that I'll only use the singular version of each word, not the plural forms (unless it makes more sense to use the plural). In case there is more than one possible meaning for a word, I added it with a ";" separating the words.

breakfast: Frühstück, das to have breakfast: frühstücken coffee, the: Kaffee, der cornflakes: Cornflakes, die muesli: Müsli, das cereals: Cerealien, die; Getreide, das cup of tea: Tasse Tee, die teacup: Teetasse, die; Teebecher, der glass of juice: Glas Saft, das "juice glass": Saftglas, das bread: Brot, das mixed wheat and rye bread: Mischbrot, das white bread: Weißbrot, das dark rye bread: Schwarzbrot, das toast: Toastbrot, das (used for toast in general and for white toast) whole grain toast: Vollkorntoastbrot, das croissant: Croissant, das; Hörnchen, das bread buns: Brötchen, das (plural is the same word, but with the article “die”) sweet: süß jam: Marmelade, die (all smooth jams without visible fruit pieces) confiture: Konfitüre, die (jams with visible pieces) "fruit puree": Fruchtmus, das (a thick spread of fruits; commonly eaten on top of pancakes) honey: Honig, der (spreadable honey: streichfähiger Honig; liquid honey: Flüssighonig) blossom honey: Blütenhonig, der hazelnut spread: Nuss-Nugout-Creme, die (Nutella, das) cheese: Käse, der sliced cheese: Scheibenkäse, der cream cheese: Frischkäse, der wurst: Wurst, die liverwurst: Leberwurst, die tea sausage spread: Teewurst, die blood sausage: Blutwurst, die tomato: Tomate, die cucumber: Gurke, die onion: Zwiebel, die a boiled egg: ein gekochtes Ei oatmeal: Haferflocken, die (plural) dried fruits: Trockenfrüchte, die (plural) raisins: Rosinen, die (plural) milk: Milch, die yogurt: Joghurt, der

lunch: Mittagessen, das to have lunch: zu Mittag essen meat: Fleisch, das chicken: Hühnerfleisch, das pork: Schweinefleisch, das beef: Rindfleisch, das potatoes: Kartoffeln, die (plural) boiled: gekocht mashed: gestampft; püriert fried: frittiert (in hot oil, leaving a crust); gebraten (in a pan) croquettes: Kroketten, die (plural) pasta: Nudeln, die (plural); Teigwaren, die (plural) rice: Reis, der long grain rice: Langkornreis, der

coffee and cake: Kaffee und Kuchen cake/pie: Kuchen, der; Torte, die (we use "Torte" often for those thingies with cream put on top, it's the sort of cake you only bake the base of, but the topping is not baked)

dinner: Abendessen, das to have dinner: abendessen; zu Abend essen hearty: herzhaft sour: sauer harsh (flavour): herb salty: salzig

Great, now I'm hungry... Ahem. Care for some German phrases now?

Essen ist fertig! - Food is ready!

Komm essen! - Come (down) to eat.

Guten Appetit! - Enjoy your meal!

Lass uns essen gehen. - Let's go out for a meal.

Das hat gut geschmeckt. / Das war lecker. - That was tasty.

Kannst du mir die Butter rüberreichen? - Can you pass me the butter, please?

- Iss nicht so schnell! Don't eat so fast.

Was möchtest du zum Frühstück haben/essen? - What would you like (to eat) for breakfast?

Ich mache dir dein Lieblingsessen. - I'll make you your favourite dish.

Was wollen wir nach dem Essen machen? - What would you like to do after dinner/lunch/a meal?

Hat jemand Hunger? - Is anybody hungry?

Ich habe Hunger. - I'm hungry.

Ich verhungere. - I'm starving.

For the Noiz-lovers, his favourite dish:

Mit Pflaumen gefüllte Schweinelende mit Serviettenknödeln. - Plum filled pork loin with dumplings.

Where the hell can you even eat that? Sounds like some fancy restaurant dish to me... Well, the dumplings might be from Southern Germany.