Bora Bora had been good to him. Not just in the surf and sand sort of way either. Sure that was part of it, he’d had some amazing adventures with his friends and would be keeping those memories for the rest of his life, but it was a lot more than that too. It was making new friendships and repairing old ones. It was seeing true love in person and seeing one of the most beautiful unions he’d ever witnessed. It had been amazing, and he didn’t regret a moment of it. He’d got to spend the summer with some of his closest friends, do things he’d never dreamed of, and live on and island paradise.
“You’ve treated me well.” He whispered out into the ocean, letting the breeze carry his words across the water.
It’ll be sad to leave this place, he knew, but part of him knew it couldn’t last forever. As much as he wanted to take Nick and hide out in a canoe, it wouldn’t work. They had a break from reality for now, but they had to face it again sooner or later. They had to go back home, to school and families and the responsibilities that their lives dealt them. It was back to building up hours for Key Club and working on AP summer reading. But it would be good, because there was such a thing as too much of a good thing. He didn’t want that to happen, he wanted to hang onto his perfect memories. Besides, he missed his family, and it was time to get back to them. He had way too many crazy stories to tell Julie once he got back anyways, and he was looking forward to sharing them with her.
Looking around the hut that he'd called his home for the past three weeks, Puck couldn't help but smile. He'd done things he'd remember for the rest of his life, and gotten closer with people he wouldn't have been able to before. If someone would have told him half the stuff he'd done on the trip, Puck would have laughed in their face and told them that he wished. With the trip ending, unfortunately, it was back to real life. He had high hopes that he'd be able to make it just as badass as their trip had been. It was a whole lot scarier to think about since he had to do it on his own, but he was still ready for it.
I LEAVE AND HEAVE A SIGH AND SAY GOODBYE → Reflection
INVOLVED → Harmony Jones
TIME FRAME → July 22, 2012
Dear Judy,
Today is our last day in Bora Bora. For real this time. I know I said we were supposed to leave yesterday, but there was a huge storm that kept us here another day which, of course, prompted Mom to freak out for 24 hoursstraight about some meeting or another.But the sky's have cleared somewhat, and it's back to Ohio we go. Which means Chandler leaving soon and my parents working nonstop and a generally boring summer. Insert pathetic jazz hands here.
Bora Bora has been beautiful. It's like something out of your imagination. The water is so blue and so clear, and even the sand is beautiful and perfectly white. And there's flowers everywhere, covering the entire spectrum of the rainbow, and there's these birds. They're obnoxiously loud and they start chirping before sunrise, but they're so colorful. I mean, you know a place is beautiful when even the birds are pretty. It's all so picture perfect and nothing like Ohio, and if I wasn't certain about living in New York City, I would definitely consider living in Bora Bora one day.
Along with Bora Bora being fifty shades of awesome, I've managed to meet some nice people here. Apparently McKinley's New Directions and Dalton's Warblers were on the island for a wedding, and a lot of them seem lovely. Well, the Warblers and some of New Directions seem lovely. Of course, there's always some bad seeds in the group, namely Rachel Berry. But I've always had a bad feeling about that Barbra wannabe, ever since she walked into September's NYADA mixer acting like she owned the place. Please. She hadn't even heard of the school until the day before. And she has this boyfriend - at least, I think he's her boyfriend - who's equally as horrible. Which makes sense. Why wouldn't horrible people attract one another? Ugh. Just thinking about them makes my blood boil.
Fortunately not everyone has been as terrible as those two. Kurt Hummel, for starters. His blog is always littered with some of my favorite songs, and I know Chandler only had nice things to say about the boy...until last night that is. But I'm still not really sure what's going on there. Noah Puckerman is another member of New Directions, and he's incredibly frustrating but entertaining at the same time - which I didn't even think was possible. Oh, and one girl named Sugar Motta seems nice, too. Even though I have no idea what she's referencing most of the time.
And then there's the Warblers like Sebastian and Jeff and Nick, and I just met another one named Thad. Sebastian's really cool and blunt which I don't think most appreciate but personally, I love that kind of honesty. Thad, the one I met most recently, is interesting. He's funny, too. Jeff and Nick are best friends, and you can totally tell. But at the same time, they're nothing alike. I don't know. They both are really nice, though, and... I guess complimentary would be the right word? But it's not about my voice or acting or any of the usual things but like, my looks. Which is weird because the only guys that have ever done that did not and will not have interest in me (see Chandler, Gavroche, etc). And Tyler, of course. But I don't even know how much of that was even real. Whatever. This is weird to talk about. But I think I'd actually like to keep in touch with them. After all, Chandler's going to be gone along with quite a few of the Unitards. I'll still have Gavroche and Pendleton and Canada, of course, but... I don't know. Westerville's not that far away from Defiance, and they're nice.
Okay, I think that covers everything since the last time I wrote, and anyway, Chandler is telling me that I need to come help him fold his clothes. Talk to you soon!
His hands are shaking the first time he hits "send," and that's all it takes for him to spill his guts to Chandler Kiehl, apologizing for what an ass he's been, for breaking Blaine's heart. He had to do it. He didn't want to hurt Chandler, who didn't deserve it, who really didn't need Kurt's douchebaggery on top of everything else, but he had no choice.
Blaine is his Ace of Hearts, the most valuable card in the deck. He feels like Quasimodo in the Hunchback of Notre Dame, holding onto the card, praying that it won't rip in half.
He knows something's happened with Blaine and Sebastian, he just doesn't want to find out, honestly. He's not sure if his heart can take it. He can't watch Blaine put himself in the line of Sebastian's fire anymore, he can't watch Blaine get hurt.
He doesn't even register what he's written until Chandler responds only with an "Oh." and Kurt knows the damage is done, he's burned his bridge and he can't bring himself to care, not with Blaine peacefully asleep next to him as the raging storm winds down. A metaphor, perhaps? He hopes so-- he hopes this fighting and uncertainty with Blaine is on it's way to being over-- they've still got things to work through but at least Kurt can sleep easy knowing that he's eliminated half the problem. He can't go back in time and erase his actions, but he can stop them from repeating in the future.
He lies down on their bed, wrapping Blaine in his arms, hoping not to disturb his sleep, and sighs, feeling so relieved. Tomorrow they'll go home, and tomorrow, Kurt and Blaine will begin anew. They'll never have to see Chandler Kiehl ever again.
Kurt never liked Chandler. He liked the attention, this he knew, but Chandler himself... there was nothing wrong with him, honestly, but Kurt didn't think Chandler was his type. Not that he even was considering Chandler to be his type because hello, he had a boyfriend who was utter perfection. He regretted his actions every single day, and he would spend a lifetime trying to fix it, trying to show Blaine that yes, he was enough. Yes, he was someone who was worth fighting for, he was good enough. He was too good. Kurt was terrified that one day Blaine would wake up and realize he could have someone less greedy, less selfish, someone who would realize what he had when he had it.
He hugs Blaine tighter against his chest, pressing a kiss to the top of his head, his eyes watering. That will never happen. He will die before it does. They will have to pry Blaine's heart out of his cold, dead hands. He blinks away the tears, because he's not sad, he's just so relieved he could sob his eyes out, but he'd rather focus on the beautiful, beautiful boy in his arms than anything else. So he does.
It's a haze. Kurt Hummel has never understood the appeal of alcohol, but it's so easy when he suddenly loves everyone in the room and feels like duetting with Rachel Berry, something he swore to himself that he'd never do again, even if she suddenly seemed hellbent on hanging out with him.
But watching Blaine get up onto that stage to sing Teenage Dream is enough to get his mind clear, his heart racing out of his chest, because there's something about this boy and this song and god, Kurt is so in love with this boy it actually hurts, sometimes. He knows he's not been an angel, he knows that he's hurt Blaine beyond comprehension at some points in their relationship, but even if he's fighting with Blaine, he knows he's always going to fight for Blaine. Fight for their relationship, fight to keep them together, because Blaine is the best thing that's ever happened to him, his week-long lapse in judgment put behind him. He hopes.
He's moving to the dance floor, couples surrounding him, as he clamors slowly to where his boyfriend is clearly making every single gay man in the room unbelievably jealous, Kurt's eyes alight. He feels like he's going to cry, because how has he, Kurt Hummel, managed to land the most perfect, selfless, talented boy on the planet.
He'll fight for Blaine. Always. He always hears that scream of anguish as Blaine falls to the pavement, the crack in his voice as he says "Who's Chandler", the hurt in his eyes when Blaine doesn't want to say "bi/bye". Kurt's not perfect. He knows this, it's something he's always known about himself, that he wants too much and he's too jealous and he's greedy.
But if keeping Blaine Anderson is the only thing he ever does right in his life, he'll consider his existence a success.
He probably should feel stupid, standing in a place where he knows Blaine can make direct eye contact with him-- and he gets butterflies in his stomach every time Blaine does, just like on that first day-- and he'll get them every time he looks at Blaine, if he wants to be completely honest.
"I love you," he mouths, as Blaine steps off the stage.
That was just the thing, his future was looking so much brighter right now. He still didn’t know what he was going to do with his life, or even what he was going to do once school started again, but that was okay. He may not have a set plan, but he felt more free now than he had before he came here, and he knew a lot of that had to do with Kurt and Blaine. New Directions had been kind and welcoming, which he was grateful for, but his old friends didn’t hate him. Blaine was all for a fresh start, and Kurt wanted to hang out and talk. That was more than he could have ever asked for months ago. Knowing that he was repairing his past mistakes made him feel lighter and happier. He could really enjoy this trip out here, and he had been.
Nick was still Nick, of course, but he wouldn’t have it any other way. Despite all their teasing, he loved his best friend, and he couldn’t imagine going on a vacation like this without him. Sure, his idea of a good time was surfing and Nick’s idea of fun was reading, but that was still okay. They looked out for each other, and that worked for him. Overall, he couldn’t ask for anything better. He had his closest friends, he was making new ones, and he was doing all sorts of things he’d never imagined he would do. Everything just seemed to be falling into place, maybe his future would too.
This was paradise, there was no doubt about it. Every single thing was perfect and Blaine was happy - genuinely happy. He may have massively been missing out on his sleep due to Kurt Hummel and unsupervised fun, but there wasn’t a single moment he’d change. The first week was complete bliss and the second was so much more. Even with the new additions to the island it hadn’t wavered.
You think I’m funny when I tell the punch line wrong,
Blaine’s fingers softly strummed along the piano keys. It was a song for Mr. Schue’s wedding, but it was obviously dedicated to his one and only judging by how Blaine couldn’t take his eyes off of Kurt as he sang. The island had done everyone good and that was pretty obvious considering the smiles all around. Blaine’s eyes dropped down to the keys for a moment as he continued to sing.
I know you get me, so I let my walls come down, down.
The place was decorated beyond what he would have expected, even for a tropical paradise, it almost felt as if it were some over the top celebrity wedding despite the staggering number of guests, everything was just completely breathtaking, especially when you could see the glow of happiness just radiating off of both Emma and Will. One day, he’d be able to feel the same, hopefully. Marriage equality wasn’t a luxury at this point in time, nor something that was even possible despite how much he loved his boyfriend. But… they were young, too young to get married just yet and with Kurt’s future still upon the horizon, the last thing Blaine wanted to do was force something too soon.
Before you met me, I was alright but things were kinda heavy, you brought me to life, now every February, you’ll be my Valentine.
There was a small smile laced through his expression has he sang softly, eyes briefly skimming across the newly wed couple before gradually finding his boyfriend once more. In a perfect world, Kurt would be his until the end, but within the last year, Blaine had sort of had a reality check with the whole forever after thing. Communication was key and it was his own fault fo putting distance between himself and Kurt, but within that distance, he didn’t expect someone to actually move onto Kurt. They were in love after all and Blaine hadn’t even considered the possibility of someone coming between them, let alone Kurt cheating… But it was eye opening.
Let’s go all the way tonight, no regrets, just love. We can dance until we die, you and I, will be young forever.
It would be a lie to say he wasn’t at all worried about Kurt going to New York but it was a risk he couldn’t not take. Even if he didn’t get into NYADA - which in Blaine’s mind was completely unjust - there was something out there for him and if Kurt really wanted to make it on Broadway, he was going to. If he wanted to go into Fashion, there would be millions jumping for the chance to wear something of Kurt Hummel’s and that was something Blaine knew. Kurt was so quick to say that was it and that Blaine was all he needed, and Blaine needed him too but… Blaine couldn’t justify holding him back for a year. They could make the distance work - they had to.
You make me feel like I’m living a Teenage Dream, the way you turn me on. I can’t sleep, let’s runaway and don’t ever look back.
Blaine’s eyes scanned the darkened crowd as he sang, some couples were paired together dancing slow on the floor built upon the sand while some were watching from their tables. He was so incredibly fortunate to come this far and it was so hard to believe. Part of Blaine - an incredibly large part of Blaine was glad that Mr.Schue extended the invite to the Warblers. Blaine tried his hardest to believe the best in people and he knew they were all wonderful and.. Well, they’d been his family for so long so it hurt to know a single year had torn them apart.They’d been his family his brothers and his support, especially when he’d come from such a dark situation. Dalton and everyone there had pulled Blaine out of his shell and to suddenly not have them? Let alone to lose them how he did? He didn’t often mention it, but it killed him for so long, so even the slightest possibility they could all fix things… Well, he wanted it desperately.
My heart stops when you look at me, just one touch, now baby I believe. This is real, so take a chance and don’t ever look back.
Blaine’s jacket had long since been draped over the back of his chair, his sleeves were rolled due to the insane heat and thanks to that very thing, his hair was beginning to repel the minimal amount of gel. As it seemed, the island and it’s heat wasn’t so font of his hair care and he’d had to spend the last two weeks without it. It was hard to believe they only had a week left... Blaine was seriously on board with Puck's plan at this point in time. How could he not be? As it was... When this was over, they all went back to reality and as some of them had found out lately, it wasn't as nearly as nice as it should be, but Blaine was no stranger to that. Still, he didn't want to leave.
We drove to Cali and got drunk on the beach.Got a motel and built a fort out of sheets. I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece.
Reality meant Kurt leaving eventually, a senior year alone. Kurt was hell bent against it but Blaine had already prepared a speech in his head and it wasn't something he wanted to ruin paradise with. Blaine continued to sing with a heavy heart, emotion thick in the air as the thoughts continued to swirl. There was so much that was yet to be decided and he had no idea how everything was going to work out but... The wedding, despite it's very surreal feel, had left him looking at the future and for once, he really didn't know what it was going to hold.
Even though Quinn and I aren't exactly sitting down and hashing out everything that happened before school got out, at least we don't have to avoid each other. Things have actually been really cool between us. I like it. I don't know if it's just this place, or if we've actually got some of our shit figured out. Whatever. I'm not questioning a good thing.
This place does have some sort of calming charm to it though. It has to. There's hardly been any fights since we got here. We're on an island with Warblers hanging around, and now even Jesse St. James turning up, and we're still all chill. It's been nothing but a good time. Maybe they drugged in the water.
