Hello Stranger [6]
Part 6 of Hello Stranger. As always, thank you so much for reading. :)
The wedding reception has just begun, and I’ve only started walking around a huge food table that has more than enough food to feed an army while I decide what to eat when Claire pushes, more accurately ambushes me into a corner on the opposite side of the room where Blondie … I mean Xander is right now. My eyes shift to his for a second. He is cracking some kind of joke, I guess because all the guys just burst out laughing and clap his back. He’s been here for less than five hours, yet he blends right in with everyone effortlessly as though he knows everyone who comes to the wedding for more than ten years. Well, I guess he really stays true to his words when he said that he bonds with people easily. I have to admit that I envy that a little bit.
“So what’s between you and this guy that you brought here? You didn’t tell me that you would have someone special with you.” Claire quirks her head in the direction of Xander as she starts out without asking about me or my well being after I haven’t seen her in almost a month. We’re both busy with our lives and our jobs and stuff. It’s nice to know that apparently my love life is the only thing that she is extremely interested to dig into every detail right now.
My gaze snaps to her. “There’s nothing between us. He’s a guy I met at the hotel. We stay at the same hotel.”
Kelsey, who has appeared out of nowhere, hands me a glass of wine which I accept gladly and chug it down my throat rapidly. “Bullshit. Lily. He’s not just no one. You two are like cute little lovebirds.” She practically sings, elbowing me. “Just tell us what happened.”
Claire chimes in quickly. “Yeah. He can’t just be a guy you met at the hotel. Look at that hot Abercrombie body. He could probably get your pregnant just by winking at you," She fans herself and whistles.
I twirl the glass of champagne which is almost empty by now. “I told you there is nothing. Totally nothing. He is my hotel neighbor and we explore Paris together for the past three days.” It isn’t even a second after I reluctantly gave them an answer that Kelsey and Claire gasp loudly and exchange knowing glances which I know isn’t good. I swallow a few sips of wine which I'm certain isn’t strong enough for me to get drunk tonight.
Kelsey has a satisfied grin spread across her face and tilts her head as she studies me. “Is that some kind of secret code? She pauses, an evil smile sliding on her face. “You two like do cute romantic stuff during the day and then at night you have a secret rendez-vous with him and have hot sex in his room and he makes you moan all night?” She practically shudders in pure delight, and I almost jump at her and cover her big mouth. The heat rushes to my cheek. The thought of me and Xander doing that is just unfathomable and unthinkable. Maybe this is a really good time to stuff the macaron tower that is her wedding cake down in her mouth just to make her shut up. “I like the new, kinky side of you, Lily.”
Claire nods swiftly, her eyes gleaming. “We don’t blame you though. It’s perfectly understandable. He’s all muscles and just so hot.” She gushes out, taking a sip of her drink. “Any sexy, cozy breakfast in bed stories to share?”
I bury my face in my hand and let out an exasperated sigh. “Eww. No. You two are so crazy and disgusting. I can’t believe I’ve been your best friends more than ten years.” I make a face, downing all of my drink and letting the dark red liquid glide down my throat. My stomach starts to feel like it’s on fire as familiar heat spreads in the pit of my stomach. Claire and Kelsey fold their arms and look at me expectantly. They look just like two little devil twins. They probably yell at Xander and bombard him with really embarrassing questions in front of everyone if I don’t give them at least some answer to satisfy their annoying curiosity. “I know basically nothing about him. We’re just strangers.” I add with an air of finality, looking around the room to snatch more drink. Anything just to escape my friends' inquisition.
“You’re lying, Lily.” Kelsey counters quickly, shaking her head. “You’re a fucking terrible liar. You totally like him. Just admit it.”
“I don’t like him,” I hiss, keeping my voice as low as possible just in case Xander has some kind of supernatural hearing ability and knows exactly that we’re talking about him right now. Not just him in general, but the thought of him and me together. “He’s an annoying little shit who follows me around like some lost golden retriever that I can’t get rid of.”
Claire clucks her tongue in a manner of disapproval before she puts both of her on my shoulders. I cock my head at her and roll my eyes. “Are you dumb or what? Have you seen the way he looks at you, Lily?”
“You guys are so ridiculous. I told you there’s nothing between me and him.” I protest even though my heart is beating really fast right now and my face grows warmer a little bit. I just hope neither Kelsey nor Claire has noticed this yet.
Kelsey just looks at me, dead serious. There isn’t a trace of a playful smile on her face anymore, and that’s when I realize that she’s actually serious. “That guy can’t take his eyes off you ever since you guys have been here.” Dropping her arms to her side, she sighs happily, that dreamy far-away look shining in her eyes when the corner of her lips curves. “You two should feed each other my macarons and get married and ride into the sunset and live happily ever after.” I duck my head down and bite down on my lips as the word macarons conjure certain memories on the first day that I met Xander.
“But not before you two have hot steamy sex,” Claire whispers rather loudly and shoots me what she thinks is a funny seductive wink, but it looks like her eyes twitch. My heart pulls down to my stomach when just only a second after Claire thankfully stopped talking, Xander’s eyes meet mine across the tent and he raises his drink in my direction, and God I do hope he doesn’t hear a single word of what Claire just said. Heaven forbid that he heard that. I would absolutely leave him in Paris and catch a train or sail from Paris to New York. I’d even ride a bicycle or dig an underground tunnel with my bare hands back home I had to.
My lips pinch together as I somewhat try to give Xander a small smile while subtly trying to tell him to whisk me away and get me out of this misery, but he can’t seem to read my mind. He just grins more widely and turns his attention back to the guys who burst out laughing loudly instead.
I cross my arms and lean back against the wall. Well, maybe I should tell them that maybe, just maybe I feel something although I’m not really sure what that thing is. I sigh resignedly and touch the back of my neck. “It feels nice to have him around, I guess,” I admit weakly in a small voice, my stomach growing warmer and warmer, which might have nothing to do with the fact that I just downed my drink in five minutes. It’s only one glass of champagne which is not strong enough to affect me.
As soon as those words fall from my lips, it’s like I drop my biggest secret on my best friends, and I wish I could take back words that slipped my mouth. Claire and Kelsey exchange another annoying knowing glance and look absolutely ecstatic as though I just told them that Christmas comes early and they’re going to wake up and unwrap all little presents under the Christmas tree tomorrow.
“You owe me a Chanel lambskin purse,” Claire turns to Kelsey, a triumphant smile on her lips. My eyes pop out. Did they just place a bet on my love life over a Chanel purse? I scowl and promptly turn on my heel, ready to storm off, but Kelsey grabs my wrist to stop me.
“Ignore Claire.” She waves her hand and shakes her head. “Chanel has become her latest obsession.” Before I can say anything else, she says. “Anyways back to this Alexander guy who looks really familiar. I think I’ve seen him somewhere before. It’s pretty obvious that he has to at least for something for you. Claire and I think you two are really insanely cute.”
“Absolutely.” Claire squeals, bouncing up and down. “It’s just that you two are so adorable. I totally approve of him just in case you want to know what I think.” She smiles, squeezing my arm lightly. My face softens as I give her hand a little squeeze back.
I clutch onto the fabric of my dress and force out what I hope is a happy laugh. It’s Kelsey’s wedding, and I just don’t want to ruin it. “Thanks, but it doesn’t matter how I feel. He has a girlfriend, and I’m leaving in three days anyway.” I rush out, nodding awkwardly as Kelsey and Claire who instantly have the same identical disappointed look on their faces. I would probably whip my phone out and capture their miserable faces if I wasn’t trying to tell myself to just smile brightly and pretend like I don’t feel anything right now.
I internally release a sigh of relief and I am about to walk off when Claire pipes in. “But that doesn’t mean you two can’t have the hottest sex ever!” She counters, her eyes lighting up hopefully when that embarrassing idea bounces around in her head. I would probably find her reaction amusing and try to laugh a little bit, but I couldn’t. Claire takes my moment of silence to add a few more of her wise words. “What happens in Paris stays in Paris.” She concludes, a proud smile on her face.
“Oh just shut up. You two.” I shake my head, an amused smile slightly cracking on my face before I wave my hand and walk off in the direction of the big buffet table as I desperately try to find more alcohol that I can get my hands on. I really need more alcohol in my system to celebrate Kelsey’s wedding day and loosen up a little bit.
*
Truthfully, I’m not exactly sure how many drinks I’ve had by the time Kelsey and Daniel start making emotional speeches that make everyone tear up a little bit. The only thing I know absolutely for sure is that I’ve never chugged down alcohol so fast in my entire life.
Right now I’m sitting or more accurately wiggling in my seat as I drink myself to oblivion. At first it is just French wine, but then I begin to mix every kind of drink I can find and pour it down my throat. Jack and Coke. Tequila shots. French wine. Champagne. Every time Xander, who is sitting next to me right now with a mixture of amusement and worry visible on his face, leans in and talks to me, whispering some joke in my ear, I nod slowly and pat his arm before I collapse into an uncontrollable fit of giggles. I don’t even know why I keep laughing. Most of his jokes are usually so lame and cheesy like he just copies them right off the internet.
“Next we have Lily! Come on up here, baby girl. You want to say something to our best friend Kelsey?” Claire’s voice booms in my ear much to my annoyance. Can’t I just drink peacefully just one night? My head snaps up, and I wave at her languidly. She is holding out her hand as everyone’s eyes are on me. Do I have to make a speech? That would be essentially the best way to embarrass myself in front of everyone because I haven’t prepared any speech whatsoever. My stomach suddenly churns, and I’m not sure if I can stand up straight without throwing up all over everyone. Still, I cock my head to the side, sipping my drink rapidly before I get up, almost knocking my glass off the table before I try my best to walk up to the little stage without stumbling and tripping over something.
“Hey guys!” I smile and wave a little. Everyone says hi back and smiles warmly. Clutching on the microphone in a death grip, I look at Kelsey and Daniel before I take a deep breath and try to compose myself. “Well, I know Kelsey ever since I was nine. The first thing she said to me when we first met is that she loved my name and wanted to borrow it for ten years.” Everyone smiles up at me as they listen to my half-drunken speech. I smile a little as I recall the memories. “I guess you could say that we became insta-friends immediately.” I am surprised that the words flow out of my mouth smoothly, seeing that I haven’t prepared anything before and what I’m rattling right now is basically right off the top of my head. “She’s just not my best friend. She and Claire,” I pause, nodding at Claire who leans her head on her boyfriend’s shoulder and gives me a soft smile. “They’re like my sisters like my real family.”
And then I stop talking. I completely stop as a lump suddenly rises in my throat, making it impossible to utter just a single word. I feel like I’m going to break down again. My gaze shifts to my shoes, and I grip the microphone more tightly in my head as my brain scrambles to think about what to say to fill this awfully awkward silence and to make everyone stop staring at me. I slowly glance up to find everyone’s gaze zoom in on me. Kelsey and Claire know I’m going to cry in any seconds, and Claire straightens in her chair and is about to drag me off the stage to stop me from making a fool of myself, but then my eyes catch Xander’s who is giving me a soft reassuring smile, resting his chin on his hand as he is nodding at me to carry on as though my speech is the most fascinating love story he has ever heard instead of just a boring same old stuff.
Pulling myself together, I grin and tap on the microphone before I start back where I left off. “So to Kelsey and Daniel,” I add, a bright smile stretching wider on my face. “You guys are the most perfect couple. Daniel, if you hurt Kelsey, I would fly all the way to Paris again and personally hunt you down and kick your ass.” Daniel kisses Kelsey’s cheek and nods his thanks at me. “Kelsey, I don’t know what to say.” I have to stop to wipe the tears off my face furiously as the crowd sort of goes aww at this point when they hear that my voice shakes slightly and I am being quite emotional. “You are going to be so happy moving to Paris like you’ve always dreamed of since you were five. I know you can’t wait to begin a new chapter of your life with Daniel. The guy that you couldn’t literally shut up and just kept on talking about him after you went on your first date with him. I’m so so so just happy for you. I love you so much.” I finish and let out a small sigh as I smile at Daniel and Kelsey. She gives me a wink, but her eyes are rimmed-red and she dabs her tears quickly with the heel of her hand.
After Kelsey and Claire have embraced me in a hug for more than five minutes, I return to my seat and slump down in my chair. There’s the only one single thought that is running in my head right now. Kelsey is moving to Paris , and we’re going to be oceans apart. As much as I truly believe that our friendship will never ever change and we can still go back to the way we’ve always been, there’s a part of me that feels sort of abandoned a little bit. I’m going to really miss so many things about our special Sundays where Kelsey, Claire, and I find hidden vintage clothes stores and just hoard everything we can find before we go to a new café to try new desserts. Kelsey and I do everything literally together. We watched the whole Harry Potter movies together where I got bored to death and randomly threw candy wrappers at some poor unfortunate soul who was sitting in front us. When we were in the tenth grade and wanted to be cool kids, we decided to get matching temporary tattoos, which were tiny little butterflies on the wrist. Kels might not have time to just talk to me whenever I need her anymore because settling down and having a family is a huge responsibility.
I’m just selfish for wanting my best friend back.
*
It might be over an hour or three hours when I feel like the world around me starts spinning slowly, and all the buzzes and conversations around me start to fade away. My cheek is pressed against the table as I slide down in my chair and watch beautiful crimson liquid swirl in my wineglass. A dreamy smile stretches across my face as I lift my head up and dip my finger in the glass before I put it in my mouth and burst out laughing hysterically when I taste the wine on my finger. Kel’s mom sends me an extremely worried look, but I just wave at her and shout that I’m perfectly fine.
“Should I be worried that your friend is so wasted?” I perk up when I hear Xander’s voice. He’s sitting opposite me now. Kels materializes out of nowhere. She pulls out a chair and plops down next to him.
She sighs heavily and shoots me a disapproval look. “Unfortunately. That’s so Lily. She is so tiny, but when she drinks, there’s no stopping her. Just let her drink and sleep and she’ll be fine.”
Xander chuckles and takes a bit of his macaron. I’m now positive that he lives on sugar. “True. I’ve never seen someone who drinks so fast like her before. She hasn't even put her drink down once.”
Kelsey turns to him. The look on her face is threatening and serious enough to send anyone run into the opposite direction. Xander just looks her, seeming completely at ease under her scrutiny. “Look. I don’t know who you are, but I’m pretty sure I saw you somewhere before.” He rubs the back of his neck slowly and laughs a little bit. “I just wanted to say thank you making Lily smile.”
His eyebrows shoot up instantly as he gives her a confused look. “What do you mean?”
Kelsey props her chin on her fist as she leans forward. “What exactly does Lily tell you about her? Probably not much?”
“She refused to tell me her name and called me Blondie. Thanks to you, I finally got to know her name.” He grins widely.
“That’s so Lily. She likes to invent something special of her own. She even names all of her stuff including her furniture.”
“So what is it about Lily that you were going to tell me?” Xander asks in a low voice, shifting his glance at me.
God. They just talk about me as though I’m not here and downing my drink quickly in one big gulp. They probably think that I’m too drunk to understand a word they say. I guess I can’t blame them, but I’m really not that drunk. I’d probably smack Kels right in her head if my head didn’t feel like there are thousand tiny people running around right now.
The next thing Kels says really makes me wish fleetingly that I haven’t taken a sip of alcohol because it’s the last thing that I need to hear right now.
“Long story short. Lily’s high school sweetheart dumped her on New Years. He’s really the biggest coward I’ve ever had the misfortune to know. No text. No message. He just left. Lily has been miserable ever since and she has barely spoken a word to anyone. I was surprised to see her come to my wedding.”
Gripping the wineglass in my hand, I turn away and focus on my attention on the dance floor where Claire is dancing with her boyfriend right now. Strangely, during four days in Paris, I completely forget about my little drama until Kelsey brought it up again. I guess because I’m in a different place. There’s nothing in Paris that reminds me of my ex Jake who just broke things off for reasons no one really knew.
“Anyways it’s the first time that I’ve seen her smile in six months.” Kelsey carries on, relaxing her shoulders. “Whatever you do, just take care of her while you’re in Paris, okay? She doesn’t let anyone in her life easily, but when she does, she just takes everything in. You’d better not hurt her.”
I glance at them at the corner of eye to see Xander’s response. The expression on his face is unreadable, but he nods and tells Kelsey something that I can’t hear over blaring music from the band. Kelsey’s gaze rest on mine, and I’m pretty sure that she knows that I can hear her and Xander’s little talk about me. I know she’s worried about me. She knows I’m not pleased that she goes to talk to him behind my back, but she then gives me a sort of sad and nostalgic smile, and that’s when I realize that maybe what I’m afraid is just written or tattooed right on my forehead. She knows that I’m afraid of losing her as my best friend when she moves on to a new phrase of her life while I’m just still the same old Lily. I feel a little left out, I guess. I can’t be her best friend anymore because that person is what Daniel is for. The thought makes me truly despise myself for even thinking something so selfish like this. I’m so depressed that I grab another drink off a passing tray, letting bubbles flow down my throat before I paste a pretty, bright smile on my face like Kelsey wants to see.
*
By the time Kelsey threatens to kick me out of her wedding because I keep pleading her with my saddest face to let me stay with her on her wedding night, I’m a complete mess. Absolutely a mess. Well to say that is probably the biggest understatement of the century. I almost managed to grab and pull down the wedding tent and make everything collapse. I have no idea how but it’s a pure miracle that I don’t manage to fall over every three seconds, seeing that I can’t even stand up straight. All I remember in the back of my mind is that Xander wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me to my feet as we slowly make our away to the Metro that is thankfully only five minutes away from Kelsey’s home. Waves of nausea roll around in my stomach, making me want to throw up while we are on the Metro, and I have to lean my head on Xander’s shoulder and clutch the sleeve of his shirt like a lifeline, inhaling his scent while I cover my mouth with my hand and keep telling myself not to emptying out what I’m sure is nothing but alcohol right here in the Metro.
When we get off the Metro, I guess that maybe I feel a little bit better. Xander looks at me, confused as I pat his chest lightly before I stumble sloppily in my shoes and sprint down the sidewalk. People around me pass by in a hazy blur as I hold out both my arms. I almost fall flat again, and then that is when I realize that my shoes are killing my feet so I kick them off before I bend down and hold the straps between my fingers, letting my shoes dangle. I start swaying slowly and jump when my feet touch the cold ground. Tonight is oddly too cold to my liking.
“Hey! Where are you going?” Xander’s voice floats to my ears from the distance. “The hotel is the other way.” Well, to be completely honest, I have no idea where I’m heading to or what I’m doing for the matters either, but it just feels nice and wonderful to take off my shoes and wander to nowhere.
I pause and spin around so fast that I almost lose my balance. A tiny shriek falls from my lips as I teeter on my tiptoes, my arms flailing widely as I try not to fall over and kiss the ground. Xander who has pretty impressive reflexes, quickly takes off after me and catches me in his arms, one of his hands rested on my elbow as I fall into his arms, and my chest brushes slightly against his. The heat suddenly spreads from the pit of my stomach to my fingertips at the brief contact, and I jump back as far as my feet allow me to.
Glancing up at him in a complete state of drunkenness, I push out my bottom lip and point to his shoes. His eyebrows pull together as he loosens his grip on me. “Whyyyy are you wearing your shooees? I say, my voice all high and giggly. I don’t even recognize my own voice. “Take them off!” I demand and take another step back from him.
“Take off my shoes? Why would I do that?” He asks, rubbing his chin as he is trying to puzzle out what I mean.
“Dunnooo” I reply, my voice getting louder even in my own ears. I start singing, stretching my arms out as I spin around in circles. I close my eyes as my feet skip the ground. “I wanna walk barefoot and dance in Paaariiiis. It’s sooo fun!” I say in a singing voice and laugh, bobbing my head up and down. I feel like I’m completely free with nothing to worry about. Or maybe that’s the effect of the alcohol that makes me forget about everything for a while.
Airy giggles bubble out of me as I spin around faster and faster. The familiar footsteps grow louder in my ears, and I tilt my head back before I turn around to find Xander chuckle softly at me, grinning widely.
“What are you laughing at? Take off your shoes and daaaaaance with me!”
He doesn’t answer. He just slides closer to me and laughs. I don’t know what is so hilarious about the whole thing or me being wasted, but I start laughing mindlessly, too. The sound of his laugh is so contagious. It’s so beautiful and melodic to my ears that I can’t help a silly smile that is spreading on my face. Hell. Maybe I really drank way too much and this is probably why these kinds of insane thoughts are running in my blurry head right now.
“I think I should get you back to the hotel, Lily.”
“Nooooo!” I let out a whiny protest and toss my shoes on the sidewalk before I slid down, squatting down on the ground. Xander leans down and stares at me in confusion while he is trying stifle his laugh and hide it in his fist. I continue babbling. “You think I can sleep here like without being arrested?” I waaanaa watch the stars! On my bucket list!” I squeal, closing my eyes while I enjoy the moment and let the wind blow through my hair. I think I took the rubber band of my hair when I was on the way to my fourth bottle of champagne. I feel Xander settle down beside me, gently nudging my knee with his. I open my eyes and wave lazily in front of him before I curl into a ball right here on the sidewalk and pillow my head on my hands.
“You’re so drunk. Come on. Let’s get you back to your nice comfy bed,” he says, trying to convince me to move.
I rub at the corner of my eyes before I open them. “Noooo. Not drunk! I just wanna sleep here and I caaaan’t move!” I protest, covering my yawn with my hand. “I’m noodles and tofu and caaan’t move.” This is typical me when I get drunk. I start gigging and yelling at everyone around me before I fall asleep faster than I drink and the next morning I just pretend like I’m not drunk, which everyone knows is so not true.
Xander chuckles lightly and moves closer to me before he takes off his jacket and put around me. I think me being drunk is possibly the most hilarious thing in his trip to Paris. I’m surprised he hasn’t pulled out his phone to take a snap of me while I’m hopelessly drunk. He holds out his hand for me, and unconsciously I slide my hand in his as he pulls me up to my feet. “Lily, hop on my back. I’m going to give you a piggy ride back to the hotel.” He says softly, looking me in the eyes. He doesn’t even sound like he’s joking.
“But I can walk peeerfeetly fiiineee!” I refuse his offer, heat rising to my cheeks. Hearing him say my name makes me snap back to reality just for a few seconds. I grin from ear to ear and try to walk without stumbling to show him that I truly meant what I said.
“Come on. It’s almost two in the morning, and you really need to sleep.” He raises his gaze up to my face before bending down and patting his back. I give him what I think is a skeptical look, but maybe I look like I’m still confused and have no idea what he is talking about because he grabs both of my wrist and basically makes me climb on his back. My heart might skip a beat when I hesitantly wind my arms loosely around his neck and hook my legs around his waist when he tells me to hold on to him tight or else he’s going to let me fall off his back.
The whole way back to the hotel, he doesn’t complain. Not one bit. He just keeps on walking, his hands cupping under my thigh, and also with my shoes in his hand while he carries me on his back as though I weigh nothing more than just a feather. I can feel curious stares and loud laughter as he starts singing and shouting what sounds vaguely like that damn horrible song that he made me listen to on the day that we first met. I just throw my head back and giggle while he continues to sing.
The familiar small street with the little café that we had our breakfast at yesterday came to my blurry vision. It is completely deserted except for a few drunken teenagers who are yelling something in French. We should be at the hotel in any minutes. I lift my head up from his back and rest my chin on his shoulder. Out of nowhere, tears start spilling down my cheeks and onto his shirt.
“What am I going to do?” I mumble to myself in a drunken daze as I wrap my arms tighter around his neck. Xander stops walking and just stands still as he is patiently waiting for me to say something. “Kels has moved to Paris and Claire will get married soon. You know I’ve been eating alone and doing things on my own for almost six months now. It’s sad, isn’t it? Am I going to end up alone?” I let it all out in a choked voice, unable to stop my tears that I’ve been trying to fight for so long now.
He pauses and seems to consider his answer for a moment. “You’re going to be fine, Lily. Trust me.” He says firmly, his voice soft. I nod slowly. For a moment I believe in him. I believe in words that someone I’ve barely known for four days. Maybe because that’s all I really want to hear. To hear someone tell me that everything is going to work out even though I know it might not be okay.
I take a slow deep breath to compose myself, feeling like I definitely should have drunk more to forget all about feelings that I wish I can make them go away and disappear overnight. As if it’s not bad enough that I break down and say stupid things to Xander, tiny hiccups bubble out of my mouth. I bury my face in his shoulder as I let tears stream down my face and clutch on to him.
“You smell so gooodd,” I breathe dreamily. I’m not even sure why I say this. “Why you always smell sooo good?” Xander shakes his head a little bit and lets out a soft melodic laugh again. “Thank you you’re here with me.” I murmur softly into his shoulder after I’ve stopped crying my heart out. Xander just nods as he listens to me as words that don’t make an ounce of sense keep tumbling out of my mouth.
After I’ve finished venting all of my personal problems to him, we finally make it to the hotel. Xander asks for the keys to my room as he tries to help me get inside my room, but I pretty much yell at him and tell him that I’m going to sleep right here on the floor. He probably realizes that there’s nothing left he can do, and he kicks the door open and helps me onto his bed.
As soon as I see his bed, which looks softer and warmer a hundred times that it probably is in reality, I squeal delightfully and immediate let go of his shoulder, diving into the bed. Somehow I manage to throw Xander off the balance. And the next thing I know, I send us both topple to the bed, with my back falling on the mattress … and him on top of me, his elbows holding his body above mine.
He leans in his face close to mine that strand of his hair tickles my forehead. That definitely sobers me up a little bit. His gaze wanders to my body, and I just notice that the hem of my dress is riding up maybe a little bit too high, nearly exposing my bare thighs. He swallows thickly and then his eyes travel right up to my face and my lips which are parted slightly. Our eyes lock on each other when he brings the pad of his thumb to my chin and just rubs it in tiny circles slowly.
My breathing starts to get heavy, and I think I’m going to faint. I’m going to definitely faint. I should look away. I know I have to look away, but I can’t.
Instead I watch the mesmerizing blue in his eyes when he lowers his face closer, so close that we are just an inch apart now. I’ve never wanted to freeze time until this moment in my life when I want everything just to stay still forever. I quietly let out a soft sigh and steal a quick glance at his lips. My mind starts drifting off to treacherous thoughts that I never know exist. What would it be like to kiss him? What would his lips taste like? How would it feel to have him trace his fingertips on my arms? I quickly focus my gaze on his hand when he pulls his thumb away from my chin and rests it on the mattress on the side of my face. Obviously, it’s just the alcohol doing all these crazy thinking talking. Xander moves and pushes himself up onto his knees on either side of my leg. My heart keeps dancing in my chest so fast until I start to feel like it’s never going to beat normally when his gaze flickers to my lips and just stays there for a few seconds, but then he shakes his head slightly and chuckles to himself, a slow smile curving up on his lips as if he’s suddenly changing whatever kind of idea he’s having in his head right now.
I can’t stand this feeling anymore. It’s all too much to have him be so close to me again, especially when I know I can’t control myself right now thanks to alcohol that makes my head dizzy. Taking a deep breath, I push him off me, nearly kicking him to the other side of the bed. “God. You’re sooo fucking heavy!” I groan. “Nearly cruuuushed me to death.”
And just like that everything falls back into what I supposed it should be although I’m not really sure what that is. He murmurs something faintly, draping a towel over his shoulder, and he is off to the bathroom. By the time I hear the sound of the bathroom being open, I’m closing my eyes and almost drifting off to sleep.
The mattress squeaks, and I assume that Xander sits down on the edge of the bed and sleeps on the other side as far away from me as possible. I pull the covers up to my chin and stir lightly, already halfway asleep, but then my eyes almost flutter open when I feel something against my forehead. I try not to move and stay still when he presses his lips gently to my forehead, making my skin that is equivalent to a warm blanket even warmer. The smell of his soap makes my skin tingle, and I try my best not to move and pretend like I’ve already drifted off faster and faster into dreamland. My heart is going to jump out of my chest when he just lets his incredibly soft lips linger on my skin a little bit longer. I almost arch my back and pull him close to me, but then he just pulls away from me all too soon.
“Goodnight, Lily,” he whispers softly against my cheek right on the corner of my mouth, smoothing my hair down on the pillow before he rolls to his side, leaving me completely breathless as I try to catch my breath quietly and slowly flutter my eyes open before I let them wander over to his back.
Xander just makes it impossible for me to fall asleep tonight.
Treacherous - Taylor Swift
