Discover Top Posts Tagged with #zobit

Time is all kinds of real, it is just our perception of time that is make believe.

Damn I have a really good memory.

But I have a fucking horrible memory at the same time, for fuck's sake I leave my phone at school and I keep forgetting to get bananas for banana bread.

#zobit

I've just put a bunch of two and two's together and it's starting to make sense why people do say I have an old soul, and my main freak out about this is when I had the dream about chasing a ghost girl out of my house, and then I caught her and she told me an augury is coming. I had no clue about the augury until a month later, and that was a little before I went through my three months of always lucid dreaming when I went to sleep...am I nuts or what

#zobit

Wait so you're dropping out because you are expected to be a failure? Don't do it man. You'll get used to the money and never go back to school. It's not what you want now because you are young. Once reality hits you you'll realize you do need a hs diploma and much more to not be stuck in a job that is physically exhausting, something you hate, etc.

Okay, hold up, my age doesn’t limit my wants nor do my wants make me a failure.

Get used to the money ?? My parents just got out of debt a few years ago, which puts them into their early 40’s. FUCK YEEEEAH. I so want to be in debt for 20 years, so what though, I’ll get used to it, no biggie. BUT WAIT A GARSH DARN MINUTE- Because of this debt we had to jump from three states back and fourth for two years so we could live with family because we couldn’t manage a house and surprisingly enough my parents couldn’t find these top notch jobs that their high school and college diplomas promised. Shocker. And when we did find a house (well, apartment) we almost got kicked out multiple times over 6 years because you just can’t balance debt and payments with shitty income because college didn’t change fucking shit in their job lives. (Granted my father did get into the medical industry, but the hospitals are cheap and pay him a little over half of what they should) But then we got a house ! American dream right ? Nice house, nice neighborhood, flowers on the front porch, But we almost got evicted three times because they couldn’t balance debt and house payments. Now call me crazy, but I don’t want to spend my adult life going through that shit again. (But with my own money of course.)

Now, once reality hits me ? Are you fucking serious ? Please, repeat to me what I need this high school diploma for ? Please, oh please, tell me why I just need to endure the next four years of the mind numbing school system we have ? Please tell me how I am an idiotic child with no concept of the reality that is our society. (Please oh please note the amount of sarcasm in this, because I have a rather biased thought that I have this reality more figured out than you do)

And now for the physically exhausting/something I hate job: Who the fuck has a job they don’t hate ? Because I sure haven’t met the bloke. And standing behind a gas station counter, is definitely not physically exhausting. I don’t see how sitting behind a big corporate desk is that much different. Or how running around owning a restaurant is that much different than the waiters and waitress there as well. (I do get the differences, but there is about the same amount of stress.)

My point in wanting to drop out is that I’m finding the goals of graduating high school and going through college completely pointless for my goals in life. (Plus why would it be made an option if it set you up for complete failure in today’s society ? Government doesn’t want you not producing for them, I can get my GED and go to my hometown community college if decide to and my nice ‘easy’ job will be knocking on my door, but-) I do not wish to own a nice big house, I dread ever having a big shiny job, and I don’t ever plan on having a family to have to fund for. I apologies for the excessive time I’ve put into this response and the amount of text I have typed, but those are topics I have been debating in my head for a long time now.

Thank you though, really, I needed a reason to vent out about this topic.

#zobit

See, what I find most confusing about today is that I'm not sure who my family is. There's my blood family, but I don't feel like I really belong with them. There's too much tension and distrust to be a true family between all of us. Too much moderate and socially acceptable violence. And then there's the Juggalo family, but even though I'm claimed welcomed I don't feel loved. A family is supposed to be loving, ya know ? And then there is the circle of friends, but none of them really get along with each other. They are all fairly two faced towards each other, and there is a ton of tension that I feel could snap and I could get a back turned on me if I say the wrong thing. I'm confused, and I feel alone. I need a family. I need a clan. I need a group of people that all love each other. I need people who I can hit up, be like, "Hey, I've been feeling really down this past week and my concious auto-pilot has kicked in, help me out guys." And then bam ! There's a few people that I can hang out with together and we can be stupid and make jokes and run around finding a good place to rest and discuss life and what the hell we're going to do about our impending future. But of course I live in one of the most dumbed down towns in Montana, and nobody truly trusts the person next to them.

#zobit

I am extremely tempted to drop out of high school next year,

Somebody tell me why I shouldn't do this

Because I've never, ever, seen myself with a big shot job

Nothing I plan on doing with my life involves a fucking high school diploma

& if I do ever choose to go to college, I could get my GED a few years later and hop right into community college and dive into debt

#zobit

I am devoid of all hope.

#zobit

Fuck it, I'm starting an imaginary band.

#zobit