SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN RELIEF and instant panic, all wrapped up neatly into all the anxiety she already had. there’s a joke in her head that went: that truck almost ran me over, way to GET MY HOPES UP, before she stood up & found that same girl from the bathroom. duly note the ‘same girl from the bathroom.’ that girl gave her A SENSE OF FAMILIARITY, like max knew her from somewhere, but she couldn’t quite place it until chloe yelled ‘max!’ then it clicked like building blocks COMING TOGETHER. if we’re to be honest, everyone that speaks her name has a certain way of doing it. victoria always sounds angry, kate always SOUNDS RELIEVED, warren always sounds ecstatic, her parents always sound purely proud, let’s not even get into jefferson. there was always this certain intimacy to the way CHLOE SAID HER NAME. just like the name was the entrance to their own secret little place, there’s so much warmth in it, even when chloe is PARTICULARLY MAD at max, or even shocked, like she was in that moment. max had forgotten for years that chloe made her feel safe, that chloe could battle max’s ANXIETY AND SOCIAL AWKWARDNESS with barely doing anything. that’s not an excuse, she knows that, but it’s that simple moment when max REMEMBERED WHY THEY HAD been best friend. knew why she had forgotten when chloe wasn’t around: she has bad anxiety, she’s awkward and the pressures of WHY THEY WERE SEPARATED created this little hell in her head that made it hard to contact chloe without feeling like a burden, without feeling almost sick to her stomach. that moment WAS AN EXPLOSION.
