#zoofic

[oh-so-shiny]

When Nick met Kels - zoofic snippet

Nick waved smoke away from his face and frowned, rolling the joint between his fingers.  It could have been the pot making him paranoid... but he didn't think so.  He had the distinct feeling he was being watched.  His dorsal fin trembled slightly.

"I like your scales."

Nick spun around, eyes immediately scanning the deck for the intruder. 

Nothing.

"Up here."

Lifting his head slowly toward the main mast, Nick couldn't help but stare.

The creature hanging upside down by its legs from the boom was unquestionably not human, possessing as it did a long, prehensile, red-ringed tail that was also currently wrapped around the boom, presumably for extra stability.  Small, red, furry, round ears poked out from sandy brown hair.  Nick stared thoughtfully at the creature, watching it swing back and forth.  Then he stared at the spliff between his index finger and thumb.

Nick blinked once, slowly, before glancing back at the creature. 

Nope, still there.

The creature grinned.  "Hey.  Whassup?"

After a moment, Nick took a deep breath of the salty sea air, hoping it would clear his head.  "Question?"

"Shoot."

"What are you doing on my boat?"

The creature uncurled his tail and, swinging upward in an admirable display of core strength, flipped over.  He then proceeded to let go of the mast, dropping to his feet on the deck.  Nick raised an eyebrow, impressed despite himself.

The creature glanced around.  "Huh.  Is that where I am? A 'boat'?"

"Yeah."

"Cool."  The creature paused. "What's a boat?"

"In this case, it's my house."

"Your house?"

"Yeah."

"No shit!"  The creature hummed, rocking back on his heels.  "It's very nice."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome.  Hey, did you know your house is moving?" 

"Well, yeah - it's a boat.  It's floating on water."  Nick held up the hand not holding the joint as the creature opened its mouth to speak.  "If you start asking me about the water, I'm gonna call this entire conversation a vivid hallucination and turn in for the night."

The creature cocked his head.  "Okay," he said, shrugging his shoulders.  "House.  Boat.  Ixnay on the ater-way, gotcha."

"Good."  Nick nodded. 

After a long moment of silence, however, he sighed and crushed the joint out against his jeans.  This strange - and flexible, Nick noted before he could slam the lid down on the thought, very flexible - creature was trespassing on his boat.  He didn't need anything making the situation any weirder than it already was.  He brought a hand to the bridge of his nose. 

"You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?" he asked, beginning to rub.  "Do you even know what water is?"

The creature snorted.  "Of course I know what water is!  I'm not an idiot.  Water's wet."

Nick paused in his rubbing to shoot the creature a dubious glance.  "It's wet," he repeated.

The creature nodded vigorously.  "Very.  Good for splashing.  Drinking and bathing, stuff like that."  Looking around again, the creature craned his neck to see over the side.  "Although I've gotta say, I've never seen quite so much of it."

*END SNIPPET*

NOTES:  For those who are interested, zuman Kelly is a cross between a monkey and a red panda (which is a major shout-out to tristinawright for her Koolio and Reggie). 

[oh-so-shiny]

Zumans are a lot like us.  They walk upright like us, look like us (save for their ears and tails, or more rarely feathers, fins or scales), raise their young like us, have a sense of play and curiosity, and are able to speak.  They are inarguably intelligent.  Recently, scientists at the Hillman-Halls Center for the Study of Zumanity in Boston made headlines with their claims that a researcher has taught a Hagan to say the word 'coffee' in over 50 languages.

But what, exactly, is a zuman? 

Simply put, zumans are hominids that, while closely related to homo sapiens, retain some primordial animalistic characteristics that make humans look positively drab by comparison.  Consider the stunningly iridescent scales of the semi-acquatic O'Flahertys, or the magnificent golden tufted ears on the Del subspecies of Ty. 

Unfortunately, this has led to a thriving zuman black market amongst unscrupulous collectors, and one has only to look at the recent decline of the Abbott to understand the magnitude of the problem.  Gregarious by nature and once commonly found in the North American southwest, Kellys especially have been hunted nearly to extinction due to the demands of the exotic pet trade.   

It should be noted here that all species of zuman are considered threatened, and are protected by law.

-Excerpt from 'The Zuman Handbook: A Basic Guide'

[This silly thing goes with my C&R AU Zoofic, A Walk in the Park.]

[callistawolf]

hello there! im loving catch and release so far ahhhh! I was wondering were I could read chapters 13 and 14? thank you!!

Hi!  Thank you!!  I’m glad you’re loving it.  I haven’t posted those chapters yet… not many people had a chance to read the chapter I posted on Saturday, I don’t think, because of the holiday weekend.  So I decided to take today off and I think I’ll take tomorrow off too, just to give people a chance to catch up.  I don’t want to overwhelm everyone!  I’ll post 13 on Tuesday and 14 on Wednesday, provided my poor old brain doesn’t forget! ;)