you make me laugh but it's not funny

a collection of things that make me feel warm like a pocket full of findings. mood: a speck of dust on a car driving into the ocean. she/her

[tankespindet]

ohh aughh ahhh I just sat with the 'in another life, I would have really liked to do laundry and taxes with you' auuughhghgh

[tankespindet]

rich because I can just open my drawer of embroidery thread and find exactly what I need when I want to create a gift for someone

[tankespindet]

very tall building and digicamera that can zoom pretty far = perfect entertainment. I could have done this for so long honestly

[tankespindet]

cut T’s hair in the heat and felt grumpy about it for some reason (the heat probably).. learned that people we used to know every well / live with are: 1) having a baby, and 2) dealing with a chronic leukaemia diagnosis. Both insights via social media. And I called L about S dating their sibling and writing to me about it and me feeling kind of weird about the situation. And now I’m walking home from a party I didn’t really want to go to and yet felt ambivalent about leaving - but I did spend four hours in the baking sun mostly talking to strangers. So I think it was a decent amount of time to put into it. Typical; the conversation got good right before I left. But ah, I’m excited to be home and relax because did I mention that it’s a warm day?????

[tankespindet]

had a dream that I went to a party with the theme being stones, like rocks. and it was pretty funny

[tankespindet]

Woke up to a message about “your public debt now that you failed to pay a fine” for a CD at the library back in the spring. And the thing is that I did pay the fine immediately when I got the message, I waited for a while and was confused that it took them that long but whatever. But apparently I got two messages about it on the same day and the second message was a bigger amount of money and I payed the first one I got and somehow didn’t see the second. I think their system messed up. And I really don’t want to pay that fucking much, paying double, seems so unfair. But then I have to call them and advocate for myself and ughhh it’s really annoying and spiking my adrenaline right from waking up !!!!!

[tankespindet]

Actually had such a nice time painting my grandma’s apartment with her children and my bf and M joining kind of randomly but she fit in very well and the vibes were good! It made me feel like I actually have a functioning family and not just a symbolic, technical one. We aren’t usually gathered and dynamic in this way. So the move is good for some things !

[tankespindet]

Got my period just as soon as I started my summer vacation. But I still went thrifting and I bought an electrical heating blanket and incidentally a gorgeous cloth bag that fit perfectly as it’s cover and now I’m as snug as a bug playing on my switch in bed and listening to the intense winds

[tankespindet]

[tankespindet]

feeling giddy today. It’s finally cool again, I go on summer vacation tomorrow, someone brought a strawberry cake to work :’-)) and we have our trip booked!

[tankespindet]

Bad night for sleeping. It was too hot first of all. Secondly T came home late from a party and it woke me up, and I woke up around two times before he came feeling a bit anxious about when he’d come home. And then he woke up when the rain came and he went up to close our windows, which woke me up. And then I couldn’t fall asleeeeep with the rain and thunder and my heart pounding. I went out to take in the rain wet clothes from our balcony, and then I convinced myself to sleep but it took a while. I feel kind of battered now, I feel it in my neck. I can’t imagine being a parent and waking up all the time for a kid, that’s another phase of life and I’m so happy with my sleep right now

[tankespindet]

wishing away the heat wave…

[tankespindet]

going home a little early today since I was almost alone at the internship. Looking up English plant names and writing friendship maintenance check-in messages to pass the time :—) I’m happy I will have more of the day left when I get home. I need to print something and send a Vinted parcel, and I need to put more effort into eating satiating meals unlike the last lazy heatwave meals haphazardly put together last minute… and I need to relax!!

[tankespindet]

Spent yesterday with M, driving around looking for a good spot to swim, very summer vacation feelings; crisps and coconut water and walking through a wheat field, flip flops and swimming in delightfully cool water, drying and warming in the sun, playing a little card game, having some hummus. It was very nice.

[tankespindet]

I wanna go to the movies but idk if it should be for obsession or for backrooms ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ many good choices! For once!

[tankespindet]

[tankespindet]

put together a rhubarb crumble yesterday and showered while it baked, then we ate it while watching Derry Girls. And today I’ve changed our bed linens and put on a load of laundry 🧘🏻 and I’m working on a knitted project for my grandmother :—) as a little moving gift for next month