The Adventure Zone Quotes @taz-quotes - Tumblr Blog

Beacon: Duck Newton... this is going to go poorly.

Justin: And then they collide.

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Aubrey: Ned, I want you to listen to me very closely.

Ned: Mhm.

Aubrey: You are literally the only person here with a weapon that can kill it. So move your ass.

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Pigeon: I think you got more going on than just protecting some trees out in the woods, not that that's not noble work or anything, but I think you got something on the side. I think you are doing a bit of monster hunting. And if that's the case, I gotta follow-up question for you, I guess... y'all hiring?

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Travis: Okay, is his back to me?

Griffin: Uh, it is, I say, terrified.

Travis: I'm going to-

Griffin: Kill Todd with fire?!

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Duck: I need you to shut off the water supply to H2-Whoa That Was Fun.

Pigeon: Why do you need to take down a water park there, Ranger Duck?

Duck: Why did you need to hide out in the forest and start a bunch of fires there, Pidge?

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Minerva: Do you not feel the warrior's excitement for the battle you are about to face? I don't understand.

Duck: I mean, I feel a deep and profound desire not to die, does that count?

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The next season of TAZ is here!

#taz #the adventure zone #taz ethersea

Aubrey: Oh shit, I've got it Barclay! Here's what we do-

Barclay: Federal pool inspectors.

Aubrey: No...

Barclay: Oh sorry, it was stupid.

Aubrey: Hey, hey, no idea is bad. It just wasn't good.

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Barclay: Sylvain is not just a place, it's a- it's a being. It's not just the crystal coming out of the ground out there, it's the planet itself. It's the life force of the planet, I guess you could call it. So I guess the springs, you know, the water kind of comes up deep from the Earth, it's got a little bit of that Earth-force in it too. The Sylvans, they need to be sustained by the planet itself. And so whether thats their planet or ours, it seems like it gets the job done. So you want to know where the magic comes from, it's from, you know, the planet.

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Barclay: Ned, are you gonna be able to sort of, I guess, lie when he sees this thing?

Ned: I actually have an idea.

Aubrey: Don't kill him.

Ned: Alright, I have another idea.

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Aubrey: Oh! Is there a water treatment plant in Kepler? That might be... good.

Duck: Or very bad. That is connected to all of the water in Kepler.

Aubrey: Admittedly yeah, but-

Duck: I mean, I would love it if we were fighting it and it was all purified, I would love that if it was drinkable- wait a minute. You think I could drink the whole thing?

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Ned: Okay, so your first idea is: a big desert.

Duck: A big desert.

Ned: You have a backup to the big desert plan: a dehumidifier store.

Duck: Ok, listen, I don't even know if that exists. I was- it was pretty late when I was cooking these up okay? And I honestly lost the plot pretty quickly after that, I don't even remember what the third one I wrote was. Please don't give me any crao about it, alright guys?

Ned: Uh, sure... big lake! Hmm.

Duck: Ok listen, I was- I wasn't really thinking at that point ok? I was tired, and it came to me-

Ned: No, no! You went to a lot of trouble, I'm very proud of you.

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Barclay: There's no such thing as a bad idea, just bad people.

Aubrey: I don't think that- Barclay, I don't think that's the saying.

Barclay: I'm still figuring out the idioms.

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Travis: An Arnold Palmer is just tea and lemonade, you guys. There's no booze in an Arnold Palmer.

Justin: I mean, sometimes there is. Arnold Palmer loves to party.

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Barclay: Maybe don't let Agent Stern see you wearing t-shirts that say, "Hey, I just visited another world full of monsters and magic." Maybe take those off before he wakes up?

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Woodbridge: Is that a jetpack? What's going on there?

Duck: Please be careful with it. It honestly scares the shit out of me. I don't even really like carrying it, I'm really getting pretty stoked about taking it home. I'm half tempted to leave it on the ground as we go back to our world, but I figure I'll hold onto it. If nothing else, I can chuck it at something and try to blow it up. It's called the Fly Master.

Woodbridge: Uh, rad name. Please do go though. That would be fantastic for me, and for- you know, everyone.

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Aubrey: Like, the crystal wants me to touch it. It feels sad.

Vincent: Wouldn’t you be sad, seeing this? [gestures to crowd] You can’t touch the crystal. Earthlings are forbidden to- the crystal was damaged as you can see. It was damaged long ago by an attack from your world against ours. That was led by humans, Aubrey. Humans are forbidden to even usually be this close to the crystal. Its power has faded since that attack. There’s not enough light to go around. It is a sad state of affairs in Sylvain and it’s solely because of your people, so no, you cannot touch it. Let’s go, they’re expecting us.

Aubrey: Aren’t you curious though, like, why I can feel it?

Vincent: I am, but not enough to allow something so risky, so profane.

#taz #taz amnesty #the adventure zone #ep9 #aubrey little #vincent

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