randomnessof_tee

We're just perfectly different. - Karina Pasian

[teesatran]

The girls of the family went out to celebrate! ❤️#JohnHowieSteak #PhamFam https://www.instagram.com/p/B6HqlXUANdZ/?igshid=am9y5xou88eh

[teesatran]

Y’all have NO idea how much I love my mama. She is the kindest, most generous, most sophisticated woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. AND SHE MY MA! Happy belated 50th, mama bear ❤️ you literally don’t look a day over 30. #happybirthday #beautifulwoman #mymama #blasian https://www.instagram.com/p/B6HeQQhgEnQ/?igshid=srh8nivixyip

[teesatran]

May 21st, 2019

Soooo.... we’ve been together almost 3 years. In between, we fight. We broke up. We hated each other. But nonetheless, we couldn’t stay away from each other.

We’re both stubborn and motivated. We’re both trying to build with each other.

And I love him so much for trying.

With every breath he has, he’s been fighting for me and loving me all the ways he knows how.

I never thought I’d fall in love with my best friend’s brother. But here we are. Wanting to build our life together. I wouldn’t want it any other way, though. I’m still thanking God for giving me you❤️

[funnypicsdept]

[teesatran]

December 24th, 2018

So what should I do now?

I’m 26.

Boyfriend.

In school.

WHY DO I STILL FEEL LOST ASF?!

❤️/ttran

[teesatran]

July 14th, 2018

Honestly, I’m just lost.

I’m beyond lost. I’m also broken.

I don’t know how I got to this point. Somewhere along the lines, we just went our separate ways. I didn’t want to, but you did. 

I kept loving you and giving you everything I had, but... now, I’ve poured out everything I’ve got. I don’t think I can pour anything else out.

With everything I went through, you’ve never once tried to make anything better for me.

It honestly hurts that my caring for you and loving you is seen as negativity. I wish you were sorry for hurting my feelings, but you’re just careless. 

[teesatran]

December 23rd, 2017

We are approaching another end!

This year has truly blessed me with some memorable moments!

I’ve been to 3 raves and had the best experiences with each. 

I have a man that will constantly dote on me even when he wants to just be an asshole. 

And I have a family that loves me unconditionally. 

I couldn’t have asked for a better, yet only a little awful, 2017. 

I just can’t wait until everything starts actually falling better into place in 2018.

[teesatran]

November 6th, 2017

Here I am, still waiting for you to love me back like a damn fool.

I don’t know what to do anymore. 

Literally fell wayy too deep.

I’ll be back to post a bit more tonight.

❤️/ttran

[teesatran]

Oct. 19th, 2017

You know, the day has come.

I knew it would come, I just didn’t think it would come so soon. 

It just hurts to know that I put so much into someone and its as though I’m absolutely nothing.

You know, at the beginning; i told myself to keep it low-key. Don’t fall for it. Don’t fall for him.

But how stupid was I to give you everything, but to get nothing in return. The fucked up part of it all is that I knew this was who you were. But I sercretly wanted to believe that you were different than the rest. I wanted to believe that by helping you and showing you the type of love you could have... where did I go wrong? 

I thought I was worth more than that by now. 

At least worth an explanation, at least. 

[teesatran]

October 13th, 2017

Honestly, I think too much

I overthink EVERYTHING that happens between you and I and I hate myself for it.

I can’t deny that I love you but I just can’t tell you before you tell me. 

I’m way ahead of you, defending you, doing everything for you. 

How the fuck do I protect myself from hurting?

Because lets be real-- I’m hurting pretty fucking bad.

ttran

[teesatran]

September 5th, 2017

You know, I’ve been extremely blessed to experience such an up and down 2017.

But I’m gonna be real here for a second.

I fell in love with my best friend’s brother.

I wish I weren’t in that place alone. & I wish that I could take back these feelings that are constantly haunting me.

Every time I see him, I experience complete bliss. I forget that when we aren’t together, I’m aching for him to want me back.

He knows the place I’m in, but he doesn’t feel the same.

I feel so stupid and lost. 

I just didn’t know one-sided love actually hurt this much.

A one-sided love that literally would result in a heartache anyway.. however, I’m still here.

❤️/ttran

[teesatran]

June 9th, 2017

When a good woman says she gives up, she’s powerless. She’s crippled. Shes done being hurt. Thus, the numbing process.

I don’t want to, but something...

I give up.

Its your turn to try again for me. 

[teesatran]

May 30th, 2017

AT-

Last night, I dreamt of you. 

Of your arms around me, pulling me in closer to you and not caring who was around to see the comfort you were giving me.

The sound of your silent breath upon my head made me feel peaceful. Made me feel kissed and worth the effort to put in.

The strength of your big arms around me and holding me tight while I tried squirming my way out of it. No budge. No give. Just resilience. But did I complain about that resilience? No. 

Its as if you knew exactly what to do to make me feel safe and sane again. 

Without you, I wouldn’t have been able to laugh more, love more, and cherish more of the little things in life. 

[teesatran]

May 2nd, 2017

Apparently, I’m an asshole because he was getting ready to come see me anyway... 

Why am I such a sensitive little bitch?

P.S. I’m worth the drive for him.

😘❤️/ttran

[teesatran]

May 2nd, 2017

Everything just keeps falling into place.

If you’re done with me, tell me like a man. 

I wasted 4 months being the man in this relationship and taking care of your ass. 

No more getting stepped on and taken for granted. 

No more playing these damn games. 

No more focusing my energy on YOUR wellbeing and getting FUCKED the fuck over. 

Grow up and establish something. 

I wanted to let you know I was your ride or die, the chick you would deserve if you did her right. 

No more giving my all to the one that doesn’t even deserve 1 bit of it.

I’m done.

❤️/ttran

[teesatran]

May 1st, 2017

This is my first time doing things on my own. 

I love that I am able to stand on my own two feet and call everything good again.

I’m constantly amazed at the strength I have to do what I do (like moving on from a relationship I was no longer happy in) and finding God again.

I used to be such a God fearing woman. But I felt so completely lost these last couple of years that it made me not want to keep believing in what had I held dear to me since birth. 

For some people, they do not have to believe in a higher being to live life humbly and kindly. For others, we have to have something to ground us and hold us to reality (seriously, otherwise there would be a GREAT number of us that are crazy..). I’m one of those people that needs God to ground her. 

Feeling so vulnerable, lost, and lonely... my last resort was praying, but I did it. 

I was recently blessed and my prayers were answered. 

Believe it or not, this is MY miracle up to this point in life. With the struggles I’ve been facing, I’m so happy this opportunity has come to me.

I’m a scared and lonely graduate student. I think I’m closer to knowing who I am now. I’m not afraid to live my life and manage it anymore.. I’m open. I’m yielding. I’m loving..... I’m finally living.

❤️/ttran

[teesatran]

December 31st, 2016

There’s a whole bunch of stuff on my mind right now. 

We’re about to enter a new year, but I’m still stuck on the same person. 

I still love you. After over two years and you’re still there in my mind. 

I remember every kiss and passion we’ve had. I don’t know what to do, honestly. How do I get over you?

❤️/ttran