//Alright, so....I’m at a loss of what to do about this blog.
I haven’t updated this thing in months, and I feel really guilty about it. But honestly, I’d feel even worse if I followed through on something else. That being....cancelling the blog.
I know I’d get a lot of criticism from people for ending the blog after months of inactivity and not even getting the half way point, but I just have little to no motivation to keep this thing going. The drama had really thrown me off course for the longest time, and now I have other personal problems to stress out about. My head just hasn’t been in a great place lately, and my creativity has taken a massive hit because of it. I feel no desire to make anything, and anything I do try to make I abandon almost instantly.
I honestly believe that I’m not cut out to run a blog, or a continuous series in general. I get way too distracted by other things, and I lose interest in my works very quickly. I’ve tried writing stories before that had multiple parts to them, but I’ve never finished them. I probably have some sort of mental thing going on. That or I’m just incredibly lazy and would rather think about the next big thing than something I’m currently working on.
That being said, I do think that part of my lack of interest in this blog has to do with the fact that there isn’t much to do with it. I mean, yeah, there are plenty of sub plots and such I can conjure up, but even they feel pretty restricted. You can really only do so much with a plot that could just as easily work as an arc in a larger story. While it does allow for character interactions and development, it kinda works against you from other perspectives. A friend of mine said that an idea like this would be more suited for a game or something, and I agree with that.
Though there’s still a part of me that wants to keep this going, partially out of obligation, and because I don’t want to disappoint the people who’ve come to love and enjoy the blog. I have a massive fear of failure (atychiphobia, I believe it’s called), and ending a blog like this would make me feel like a failure for not being able to go through with it to the end. And I’d feel like I’d have failed the people who’ve been invested in this.
There are also plenty of story ideas that I would’ve loved to try, like having Ibuki and Ishimaru become a couple, or Sonia becoming a replacement for Kyoko if Kyoko was to be eliminated. But with the nature of the blog, it’s kinda hard to plan for future events. You don’t really know who’s going to be around in the end, so you won’t be able to make certain ideas you had work if the people involved can’t take part. I’m not knocking the audience for making the blog unpredictable, I actually really like the idea of the viewers being able to alter the course of the story. But as the creator, it makes it harder to plan for things.
However, there is a potentially hypocritical silver lining to this. I’ve been toying around with an AU idea for some time, and I feel like I’d be able to do more with it than I can do currently with Death Game. And yes, I know AU blogs are incredibly cliche, since pretty much every DR blog here is an AU. So uniqueness would be out the window almost immediately. And after snooping around the site a little bit, I can confirm that I’m not the only one with this specific idea. So I’m a bit hesitant to start it up with that in mind.
tl;dr, I want to end DG, but at the time, I don’t. And I want to start another blog, but at the same time, I don’t. That’s basically the summery of this entire post.
If I do end up ending DG, I will make a post detailing ideas I had for the blog, including things like who the mastermind is and various other twists. So I wouldn’t be leaving you guys hanging.
For now, I won’t be deciding anything just yet. But I just wanted you all to know where my head is right now.
