Jamie's Blog

Blog of Jamie H. curator of the GRA project

[the-gra-project]

It’s one of those evenings. The world around me seems like a dream. Whatever. I just need to distract myself.

[the-gra-project]

I don’t know what I’m doing exactly. I’m not really familiar with Tumblr but Nadi said that keeping a diary of sorts would be useful for me in this project and also mentally. I’m on my way home from her place, actually. My head is cold.

Tonight was strange. Also, comforting, and pleasant. Interesting. Nadi was throwing a house party and invited me (I don’t know why, I don’t like parties) and then next thing I know I was sitting in her bathroom on a stack of boxes. It’s a tiny bathroom, no bigger than my own, last year I helped Nadi decorate it with green subway tiles and it looks nice. There really wasn't much space between the boxes and the sink and she could barely reach around me. There is still a glass of wine or two in my system, or three. And I guess I got sick of having long hair.

Nadi shaved it all off. Well, not really, it’s more of a buzzcut but I don’t think I’ve ever has short hair like this. God, she is exactly the type of person to throw a house party and then spend an hour in her tiny bathroom with me, shaving off my hair on a whim because I needed some type of change. All it took for me was to say I don't know, I might cut my hair and she sort of automatically got up and said okay, let’s do that. She’s too good to me. I really don’t think I deserve such a soul in my life. 

I closed my eyes so I could really take in the moment and remember it. My therapist told me to try to focus on one sense at a time (so either vision, sound, smell or touch) to really be able to remember certain moments and I gotta say it’s been working. I still remember exactly how I felt last year at a concert because of the way the drums felt in my heart. Or the one time I went horse riding and how coarse the horse’s mane was. Tonight, Nadi hummed a melody I don't remember the name of and a single drop of water fell into the sink. The light bulb was buzzing above my head. 

She decided to also bleach and dye my hair. I told her I don't know what design or color I want so she handed me her phone for me to scroll through Pinterest. The first picture I saw was of a blonde buzz cut with red flowers forming a crown. I really liked it. Nadi said that blue would look better since it matches my eyes plus she didn't have any red dye left anyways. And I think it looks good.

I started packing already. I'll be moving to GRA soon.