fazbender?! i hardly know ‘er!!!

my name's ashy! (he/she) a sideblog for all my dsaf and dialtown related rambles and other such creations because i am. Too shy to put them on main or twitter!!!

[thedogofchristmaspast]

do you think norm had to learn how to make his own toothbrushes or do you think he has the worst breath known to man

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 25)

( previous / next )

Oh, so now you want to listen to my descriptions? Funny, you weren't too keen on that when I was eagerly describing how dangerous the Princess was before.

"DESCRIBE. NOW."

"Real-narrator, YOU describby."

"Whatever. I don't need it. I can see on my own." (Abandon all narration)

Voting ended onJun 8

"I don't care. I LOVE her. We understand each other. You just hate us and want to see us SUFFER!" THE NARRATOR: You have no idea what you're saying. I've warned you about all of the dangers and still, you— THE NARRATOR: …You place your head in your hands and begin to sob. You are such a child, you know that? VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Try living with them permanently. THE PRINCESS: Hey, what's wrong? THE NARRATOR: … "Well?" THE NARRATOR: What? "Where's the describeys???"

[directdogman]

Oh, right, it's June!

My inbox is inundated with asks wondering what Gay Randy©'s been up to. I actually slept in yesterday and forgot to make my usual post. Whoops. I'm sure Gay Randy© would love to know he was missed so badly, though! Happy Pride, everyone!

[thedogofchristmaspast]

it's pride month and i have exams in 2 days so of course i'm doing the responsible thing and FINALLY starting olandy

i'm too stp brained right now i bounced in my seat and thought THIS IS JSUT !!! LIKE PRINCESS i can't believe doggo made stpbwgi canon???

i also did NOT realize there would be Actual voice acting in here Hello????? i have heard randy's voice in merch ads of course but hearing him actually speak ingame was such a surprise. thats awesome

[thedogofchristmaspast]

haven't had time to finish the next part yet...i am so sorry...as compensation take these various doodles of "dialtown but with quiet instead" concepts

it would mess with quiet's identity SOOOOO bad.....not Only being a Bird Monster but Also having that organic head to go along with it. people would be Staring. so i think most of the routes would be surrounding discovering Why he feels so out of place and coping with it differently depending on which dateable he's with. the main routes mapped out in my head so far are:

since quiet would start in the woods after having just been somehow punted from the construct, if you choose to stay there you net bigfoot. i think they could become good buddies

karen would normally occur from bigfoot's route, with bigfoot taking you to the bank, introducing you to her and then everyone becomes best friends forever. but i also think it would be fun, depending on how the voices work, if opportunist could show up and prompt you to go to the bank on your own. it'd be cool to be able to collect voices. but i don't know how it would happen yet

oliver of course is Extremely into everything going on here. he thinks it's Totally Groovy that quiet is a giant bird man even with a weird flesh head. they should embrace it! and it'd be great for the movie he's gotta make. and it's awesome, although. sometimes. it feels a little dehumanizing. or maybe even a lot. depends how you do the route, i think. oliver would realize eventually though since he does know how it feels to be in a body that doesn't align with your identity. in the end quiet becomes Transgender

for randy, you go to the park and save him when you find him getting attacked by swans. at first he thinks you're the Swan Reaper here to finish him once and for all. you're able to get a look at yourself in the water and upon your confusion about how you look, and also seeming amnesia, randy throws the idea out there, not entirely seriously, that you might have been cursed like he was. on some level it makes the idea of him being cursed himself somewhat easier to believe, if someone else has also had that happen, so he chooses to go with it regardless of whether it makes sense or not. his route could do with how to bypass the curse, maybe learning how to look more human so that you can fit in better? which, randy isn't really the best person to give advice on that, but he's the best, least-judgy one you've got, even if a lot of it is through fear you might kill him otherwise/he's got nothing left to lose. i'm sure trying this will turn out well for everyone

also thought about how norm lives in a cabin in the woods

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 24)

( previous / next )

Your appearance is… unconventional, yes, but I wouldn't call you a monster. Not in the way the Princess is. Trust me, she is nothing like you.

"I don't care. I LOVE her. We understand each other. You just hate us."

"Oh shit, like actually?"

Voting ended onMay 28

"Too late. I'm attached to her for life now. Or at least for the next couple hours before I forget all of this ever happened." THE NARRATOR: Stop that. "In fact… I think…" THE NARRATOR: Don't. Don't say it. "I may be falling in love." THE NARRATOR: Shut up. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: You literally JUST met her. "You can't JUDGE me for LOVING, narrators!" THE NARRATOR: Oh, I'll judge you however I like. Do you even realize what you're doing? Killing everyone, killing yourself, all for this… this monster? "…People call ME a monster." THE PRINCESS: Oh no, are you okay? "You've been telling me to come down here and kill her… But all this time, she was just like ME." THE NARRATOR: I only called her that because for her it's true. She's an existential threat to our entire universe. You're not that. You're a real living being.

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 23)

( previous / next )

Like I've been telling you to do, please, drop the chain, go back upstairs, get the blade, and stab her in the heart. It will be so easy if you just do it.

"Too late. I'm attached to her for life now. Or at least until I forget."

"Is all of that… really true…?"

"Ough. My mouth funny." (Drop it)

"Okay, yeah, fine, I'll kill her, whatever." (Drop it and head back up)

Voting ended onMay 27

"GURGLE MASTER: MASTER OF GURGLE. I SPEAK TO THEE." THE NARRATOR: The Princess's eyes widen. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: —ou—hey, what was that? I wasn't even done speaking. "What do you mean? Nothing happened. Don't worry about it. :)" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: I don't like that. THE PRINCESS: I… just felt something. A change? THE PRINCESS: Did you feel it, too? THE PRINCESS: … THE PRINCESS: Were you trying to speak to me? "SHE GETS ME!! SHE GETS ME!!! [Happy garbling noises]" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: She just asked if you were speaking to her. That doesn't sound like she 'got' you to me. THE PRINCESS: I'm sorry, I don't know exactly what you're saying. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: See? THE PRINCESS: But I think… I can kind of get the gist. THE PRINCESS: You just want me to understand you, don't you? To be understood. "You were saying?" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Oh come on, that doesn't mean anything. She could guess that. It doesn't mean she actually understood you in any way. THE PRINCESS: I can't say that's not familiar to me… THE PRINCESS: And you seem happy that I got that. "Narrators… I-I think…" "I'm starting to form a BOND with her." THE NARRATOR: No. No, you are not. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: All this over gurgle-guessing? "Gurgle MASTERY." "I told you. She's a Master. One of the best there is." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Again, she doesn't actually— THE PRINCESS: Oh. Thank you. THE PRINCESS: I'm not entirely sure for what, I just… felt like I should say that. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: …God fucking dammit. "Believe me now?" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: How the HELL did she— THE NARRATOR: I'm nipping this in the bud before it goes any further. Of all the things you could do here, forming a 'bond' is possibly the worst. You're not doing that because she is a heartless monster that will cause doom and destruction to everything you know and love. Anything you think you may have with her is built on nothing more than lies and manipulation.

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 22)

( previous / next )

i had to split it here because this next one was too long for the tumblr image limit and this is the most natural cutting-off point i feel...the rest will be posted very shortly!

"She doesn't have to understand my words to understand my message." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: And what message is that, exactly? You realize you've barely even been talking to her, pretty much just us. Even if she COULD somehow translate what you were saying, she'd STILL think you're insane. "…It was a hidden message. You have to be REALLY good at Gurgle to understand it." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Last I checked, 'Gurgle' isn't a language. "Well, it is. Not my fault you don't know anything." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: It ISN'T. "It's okay to admit when you're wrong, y'know." "Insisting like this just makes you look stupid." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: That's RICH coming from y—

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 21)

( previous / next )

I REALLY don't think she does, Typegingi.

"No, don't you see that? She's listening to me. She understands."

"She doesn't have to understand my words to understand my message."

"GURGLE MASTER: MASTER OF GURGLE. I SPEAK TO THEE."

"Okay, maybe you're right. But I can't just give up now!" (Keep holding on)

"Okay, maybe you're right…" (Drop it)

Voting ended onMay 24

(the full princess sprite i drew!)

"You're all so mean to me. I bet the Princess LOVES my gurgling." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: You'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who TOLERATES it, let alone 'loves' it. "Maybe you two just have bad taste." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Bad taste in gurgling? "Exactly." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Uh-huh. "Unlike her. Her taste is REFINED." "She'll recognize my skill." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: You don't even know her. "I know a professional Gurgle Master when I see one." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: One: that is not, has never been, nor will ever be a thing, no matter how many times you break into the 'Jobs House' trying to make it into one. Which, by the way, isn't a thing either, and the poor civilians whose homes you enter and harass relentlessly have NO power to do any of that. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Two: I SINCERELY doubt she has understood any of your babbling thus far. She can't read your mind like we can. "You don't know that." "And—wait, you can read my mind?" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: I'M LITERALLY FROM YOUR IMAGINATION— THE NARRATOR: Oh for the love of—fine! You can babble! It doesn't matter! But please, for the sake of everything would you stop arguing and do something already? This conversation is inane. "Oh, I'm doing something, alright." "I'm proving you WRONG." THE NARRATOR: You turn your head, the shackle still held between your teeth, and look up at the Princess. THE NARRATOR: She stares at you. Her expression is unreadable. "Fuck. Real-narrator, what does it say?" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: What? "The words on her face. What do they say?" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: The what? "You KNOW I don't know how to read." "You're supposed to help meeeee… :(" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Her face doesn't have words on it, though. WHY would her face have words? "I dunno, that's just what the British one said." THE NARRATOR: Hold on, is this because I said her expression was 'unreadable'? Seriously? THE NARRATOR: That was a figure of speech. It means you can't tell what she's thinking or feeling. Understand now? "Not really." THE NARRATOR: …We're all doomed. "Hey. Princess. Do you understand me?" THE NARRATOR: She doesn't respond.

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 20)

( previous / next )

Not that the Princess's opinion matters of course, but yes, please, everyone wishes you would stop. And regardless, it's still not going to break. Go ahead and destroy your jaw if you want, but it won't change anything.

"You're all so mean to me. I bet the Princess LOVES my gurgling."

Chew harder out of spite.

Start licking the chains.

"Oh-kayyyyyy…" (Drop it)

Voting ended onMay 18

Gnaw at her chains like a wild animal. THE NARRATOR: Really? That's your plan? THE NARRATOR: Whatever. You crouch, leaning over a section of the Princess's chain that touches the ground. Your earlier bruises make your position slightly painful, but unfortunately, not painful enough to deter you. THE PRINCESS: Are you going to free me? Thank you, thank you! THE NARRATOR: You lower your head and despite all that is reasonable, bite down, trying desperately—and in vain—to gnaw through. "Is it working?" (Speak with your mouth full) THE NARRATOR: Your words come out garbled and incomprehensible. THE NARRATOR: No, it's not working. That's what 'in vain' means. Did you expect it to fall apart in just one bite? "…Maybe." THE NARRATOR: It's a steel chain. It wouldn't be keeping the Princess down here if it were that flimsy. "Okay, but what if it WAS?" THE NARRATOR: Would you please stop talking with that thing in your mouth? I know what you're trying to say, but I'd rather not listen to your gurgling. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: It's probably weirding out the Princess, too. It's weirding out ME.

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 19)

( previous / next )

Not when the fate of the world is on the line, no.

"Hey. ;)"

"So about that backstory…"

"Sorry about all that. The voices in my head are arguing about killing you."

"Will YOU take me to the funfair?"

"You. Me. Funfair."

"PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TAKE ME TO THE FUNFAIR PLEASEEEEE"

Pass out in front of her.

Slay the Princess.

"That sounds terrible, actually. I'm too Wild for that lifestyle."

"I'm gonna be ROYALTY!" (Agree to free her)

Gnaw at her chains like a wild animal.

Go back upstairs.

Voting ended onMay 16

"You mean you're letting me lay eggs in your royal princess castle?" THE PRINCESS: I guess that's an option, sure. THE PRINCESS: I don't actually remember if I have a castle, or where it would be, but I probably do, right? THE PRINCESS: I think if I leave, I'll be able to find my way home. It's nice having someone to talk to for once, so I don't mind if you want to join me. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Man, she must be REALLY desperate if she's willing to promise you that. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Normally I'd say to cut your losses and leave her here instead of killing her, but considering the evil voice that's out for her and the whole lonely tragedy here, I don't think I would feel good about that. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: …To be clear, this means I think you should at least try to help her. You've gotta have at least SOME tiny ounce of empathy in that heart of yours, right? THE NARRATOR: I cannot overstate how terribly catastrophic that would be. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Does this guy EVER shut up?

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 18)

( previous / next )

Don't listen to her. She's trying to find whatever reason she can to get you to free her, but she doesn't actually mean any of it. You can still go back up and get the blade.

"L-Like… on a date?!"

"Hm. Princesses usually have a lot of money, right?"

"You mean you're letting me lay eggs in your royal princess castle?<

"No thanks. I'm a lone wolf."

"Nah, this place is perfect, actually."

Voting ended onMay 15

"Just so you know, I'm VERY pregnant." THE PRINCESS: I… see. That's fine. THE PRINCESS: Congratulations? "Thank you." THE PRINCESS: You're welcome. "You see, I've been looking for somewhere to lay my eggs." "The best place." THE PRINCESS: Oh. Is that why you came here? "I'm going to be a PARENT." THE PRINCESS: I-I'm sure you'd want a nicer place than this to have them though, right? THE PRINCESS: It sounds really important to you, and I just want to leave. If you can figure out these chains, maybe we could look for somewhere together?

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 17)

( previous / next )

"I'm Typegingi." THE PRINCESS: It's really nice to meet you. THE PRINCESS: I mean it. I've been alone for so long.

Now that you're here, could you help me out of these chains?

"Hey. ;)"

"So about that backstory…"

"Sorry about all that. The voices in my head are arguing about killing you."

"Will YOU take me to the funfair?"

"You. Me. Funfair."

"PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TAKE ME TO THE FUNFAIR PLEASEEEEE"

"Just so you know, I'm VERY pregnant."

Pass out in front of her.

Slay the Princess.

Gnaw at her chains like a wild animal.

Go back upstairs.

Voting ended onMay 14

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 16)

( previous / next )

"Cool."

"I'm Phonegingi."

"I'm Typegingi."

"I'm Frothbaby."

Voting ended onMay 13

"WHO ARE YOU." THE NARRATOR: Your shout briefly catches the Princess off-guard. THE PRINCESS: I'm… a princess. "Hmm. Explain." THE PRINCESS: I don't really know what else there is to explain. I'm just a princess. THE PRINCESS: If you'd like, you could address me as 'Your Royal Highness'. Or you can just call me 'Princess' if 'Your Royal Highness' is too formal. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: I mean, I think there's SOME other things she could explain. Like what country/kingdom she's from, or her name. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: I won't even touch on her lack of political presence or her head, because CLEARLY this place is some kind of weird pocket dimension bullshit that I don't wanna deal with. THE NARRATOR: See? This is exactly why you shouldn't trust her. She's being far too vague. Go back upstairs, get the blade, and slay her before it's too late. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Like YOU'RE one to talk.

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 15)

( previous / next )

Hi! I'm glad you're okay. I was starting to think we'd be stuck here forever.

"Hey. ;)"

"So about that backstory…"

WHO ARE YOU.

"Sorry about all that. The voices in my head are arguing about killing you."

"Will YOU take me to the funfair?"

"You. Me. Funfair."

"PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TAKE ME TO THE FUNFAIR PLEASEEEEE"

"Just so you know, I'm VERY pregnant."

Pass out in front of her.

Slay the Princess.

Gnaw at her chains like a wild animal.

Go back upstairs.

Voting ended onMay 12

Pick yourself up and approach the Princess. THE NARRATOR: Thank you. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Come ON, we could've— VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: —Actually, nevermind, it's you we're talking about. As long as you're doing something that isn't taking somebody else's life, I probably shouldn't complain. THE NARRATOR: Although it takes some effort, you push through the soreness all along your body and manage to get yourself to your feet. THE NARRATOR: The Princess smiles at you. There's a heavy chain around her wrist, binding her to the far wall of the basement. THE PRINCESS: You did it! Do you think you could come over here? THE NARRATOR: Remember, don't be fooled. No matter how friendly she seems, she's just trying to manipulate you. You have a mission.

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 14)

( previous / next)

...

Pressure for a backstory.

Pick yourself up and approach the Princess.

Give your own backstory from where you are.

"Fuck all of this." (Pass out)

Voting ended onMay 11

"Tragic backstory time?" THE NARRATOR: No. THE PRINCESS: Are you… asking me how I got here? VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: I mean, it doesn't HAVE to be tragic. Maybe he has the most wonderful happy backstory out of everyone ever and is just a terrible person naturally. THE NARRATOR: I am not a terrible person. If anyone here's a terrible person, it's the Princess. Please try not to get us confused. THE PRINCESS: Or does that mean you wanted to tell me about you? VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: So the happy backstory part is true. THE NARRATOR: I didn't say that. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Then it is a tragic backstory. THE NARRATOR: I… didn't necessarily say that, either. THE PRINCESS: If you want to talk, it'll probably be easier face-to-face. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: You were a LOT more hesitant with that. Y'know, if you don't want people to figure things out like this, you've gotta get better at actually coming up with something. THE NARRATOR: …Fine. Whatever. Is it just the 'vibes' of the backstory you're looking for? Then, yes, I suppose you could say it's both. There were happy moments and there were tragic moments, overall bittersweet, just like everyone else that has ever existed. Does that satisfy you? Can we move on now? VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: How do you expect anyone to believe what you're saying when you're not telling them anything about why? Giving any reasons to trust you? THE PRINCESS: I know it might be a bit hard to get up after your fall, but I think you can do it! THE NARRATOR: I have already told you why, it's because the— VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: You keep saying the world will end, but you don't actually have any proof, do you? Or you would've given it to us by now, instead of asserting it over and over. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: You're just kind of terrible at lying. Anyone else would've at least told us a fake backstory. THE NARRATOR: Or maybe that's proof that I'm not lying, and that I don't want to lie to you. Maybe I'm just a private person. Maybe it doesn't matter. Maybe, or perhaps more definitely, there are more pressing matters at hand than my 'tragic backstory', and the universe will be eternally in your debt if you get back to dealing with them. THE PRINCESS: …Please? VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: I'm not too keen on murdering an entire human being for no reason, and if you are a non-evil person with any sense then you should understand why. (Plus, asking this creature to do something like that could unleash something I'm too scared to even imagine.) You either give us a reason to trust you, or we don't trust you.

[thedogofchristmaspast]

slay the princess but with gingi instead (part 13)

( previous / next )

Then we don't have to listen to you.

"I could really go for some cough nectar right now."

"Tragic backstory time?"

"I'm not really convinced I'm NOT hallucinating him right now."

"Wait. Ears… Don't those normally only grow on flesh-heads?"

They're fighting again. Cry.

"Fuck all of this." (Pass out)

Say nothing.

Pick yourself up and look at her.

Voting ended onMay 10

"I said STOP FIGHTING!!!" (Ignore the Princess, focus on your inner demons) THE NARRATOR: I imagine you'll have quite a hard time ignoring the Princess if you keep speaking to us in that manner. "What does that mean?" THE PRINCESS: I… don't really know what that means. I'm not fighting anyone. "Shit, she can hear me." THE PRINCESS: Well, yeah. You were pretty loud. "How is she doing this?" VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: I'm just gonna go out on a limb here and guess it's because you've been speaking to us out loud this entire time. THE NARRATOR: Yes, and that's exactly what I meant earlier. Have you ever heard of an inside thought? Perhaps you should consider using those. THE PRINCESS: I… have ears? "I don't know what that is." VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Yeah, they don't really do that. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: Most of the time I just stay quiet when they're talking to people, but most of the time there isn't a voice of possibly-hellish-origin trying to convince them to kill someone. THE PRINCESS: You mean ears? THE NARRATOR: The slightest sound of metal clinking can be heard from across the room. THE NARRATOR: How many times do I have to tell you? The Princess must be slain because she's going to end the world. Do you want the world to end? Because that wouldn't turn out very well for you, nor your bodily friend here. THE NARRATOR: And I'm certainly not of any 'hellish origin'. THE PRINCESS: Oh! You don't have any. That makes sense. I'm sorry, I didn't notice. THE PRINCESS: Ears are… they're these round things on the sides of your head. Well, my head. They help people hear, I think. THE PRINCESS: But I guess they're not really needed to hear, if you don't have them. VOICE OF THE NARRATOR: So what is your origin, then? Because you're definitely not from this mind. There's something different about you, compared to the common cough syrup-induced hallucination. THE NARRATOR: I don't have to tell you that.