Itās time for me to go.
I kept this blog mainly so that I could let people know how I am, and have a point of contact if someone wondered what ever happened. It was maintained in order to soothe and appease. Also mebbeh a little for ego stroking every once-in-a-while.
So my life transitioned rapidly after I decided I knew the way I wanted it to go. The internet isnāt a huge part of it. I still use it for information and watching shows, but not so much for being social and living. Iām a very tactile person, and thatās just how things leaned when I was supported in being myself, without the pressure of peers.
Iām very happy. I keep telling people, Iām as happy as I can ever recall being. Yet, nothing slams me back down from the clouds like being reminded of how much of a fool I had been only a couple of years ago. Iāve made as much peace with it as I think I ever will, and while it is properly compartmentalized in the past, it still haunts me, here and only here. And itās not people poking at me or being offensive. No, a lot of the times, itās good people who had similarly terrible things happen to them. I want to help. I want to tell everybody that there is light at the end of the tunnel and to stay strong, grit dem teeth, but I feel like the amount of time which has passed, compared to the fact that the same shitty shit is still shitting, is becoming a tad too much for me to bear. I want to stop spending so much time thinking of the same things over and over. Life is short, and Iām starting to really get the sensation that I canāt spend a second longer of it bent over the pool of toxic waste that is what this place has become to me.
If you feel like you might have influenced me to do this, you can stop there and breaf. Iād always sort of intended to fade away under everyoneās noses. Most noses. If this idea sounds wholly horrific to you, then Iāll be checking back a few more times here to see if anyone may have asked to add me to skype, which is a concept I am open to so long as you actually intend to talk to me sometimes.
I hope you guys have a swell life. Make the right choices. Know what you want, and if you donāt, figure it out. Donāt be anybodyās idiot. Be a force for good in a world with still so much evil. Be a mountain among people, and nothing will ever shake your foundations.











