“Can you put your shoes on?” I ask Ada, setting the tiny Converse in front of her. I hear my phone buzz from its spot on the coffee table but I ignore it, like I’ve been doing since it started buzzing this morning.
Someone really wants to get a hold of me, but I don’t care to respond to them. Ever since Charles and Lando left to go back to the Formula 1 world a couple of days ago, I’ve been a bit distant with everyone. It’s clearly noticeable from the way that Charles texted me the other day telling me that I have to respond to him- if only just to let him know that his daughters are still alive and taken care of.
All of those videos showing how “poor and decrepid” parts of eastern europe are, they’re contraproductive because seeing those images just feels like home. It feels like a place where you grew up, where you played with your friends and where you were happy, seeing videos showing it as depressing and “horrible” is weird, why are all of the pictures taken in winter? Why are all of them empty of people and why are they all presented with this aura that’s sinister and cold.
They feel like that because they’re void of people, they’re void of the children playing outside, grandmothers gossiping and people coming home from the supermarket, There are no dogs, no cats, there’s no one sitting on the bench reading a book.
Hi, I really like your writing and I wanted to send a request for Newt (tmr) if that's okay? My thought was that the reader was the first girl that showed up in the Glade, and with that, some of the boys there were kinda disrespectful, sometimes even making her insecure to be alone. And Newt, being the sweetest and most caring of them all, became the one she grew most attached to, she hardly ever leaves his side. And Newt also became super protective of her, like, when some of the others are near he'll subtly hold on to her or pull her to his side, things like that. He's just super soft with her and she's everything to him, however he doesn't think his feelings are reciprocated. And you can decide how they get together, i just wanted to see that dynamic. Would be super grateful if you could write it, thank you <3
soft newt my beloved
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You can feel the eyes on you no matter where you look. You haven’t been stared at like this in a long time, if ever, and no lack of memory can make up for the fact that this feels terribly, utterly wrong. It’s one thing to be the center of attention, but this? This lack of privacy, no, this sudden, terrible attention? This is the worst thing you’ve ever experienced. It even outweighs waking up in the center of a massive maze with only a couple dozen boys to keep you company.
The boys, however, are precisely the problem right now. You are the only girl to ever show up in their Glade, and they’re making their shock quite evident. Wherever you go, you find yourself followed by curious stares and fascinated looks. Even now, just sitting at a bench and wishing the noon break would come to an end, it feels as if every head in the Glade is turned towards you.
It would be one thing if they were just confused by you, but this is different, more malicious. These boys are hungry for someone like you, they stare at your every muscle and bone as if imagining you in their clothes, or in no clothes at all. It’s like you’re surrounded by a pack of wolves, except instead of bloody jaws all you see are their eyes, constantly watching. No matter where you go, you are never alone long enough to feel safe.
Just when you think that you might go mad from the sheer exhaustion of being witnessed, someone slides into a seat next to you. You look up with a start, but relax when you realize you know the boy beside you. This blond second in command is one of the only guys here that you actually trust, something you learned within your first hour of coming out of the Box and has stayed true even now, a week or two after your arrival.
Newt glances at you briefly, taking in the knot of your brows and the way your hands won’t stop twisting together. “They’re not getting any better, are they?” He asks, jerking his chin towards the masses of boys surrounding you.
You shake your head. “Not at all. I thought they’d get bored of me, but it doesn’t seem like that’s the case.”
Newt grimaces. “I don’t know what’s gotten into them. They’re normal boys, I swear, it’s just that–”
You cut him off, voice soft. “It’s just that they don’t know how to act around a girl? I mean, I get it, it’s certainly weird that there were no girls here at all and then I showed up, but they don’t have to be like this.”
Newt finishes your thought for you. “They don’t have to be like monsters. I wish you could have had a normal entry to the Glade, or as normal as it gets around here. You deserve that much, at least.”
A rush of gratitude hits you, all directed towards the boy sitting beside you. You haven’t known Newt for long, but compared with the rest of the emptiness that contains your missing memories, it could have been forever. You have no idea why Newt has taken it upon himself to make sure you’re alright, but you couldn’t be happier that he did.
Newt, after all, is the one person who makes you feel safe. With him beside you, it’s as if the rest of the stares start to drop off, none of the boys wanting to be caught being creeps by the second in command. Newt’s presence is a silent shield, a buffer of quiet jokes and real smiles against the restless boys.
Soon enough, the workday will start again, the two of you will part ways, and that same feeling of insecurity will wrap itself about you once more. For now, though, you are content to sit here with Newt and pretend that nothing here could ever hurt you.
If you thought it was hard to face all that attention during the day, though, it only worsens once the sun starts to drop beneath the horizon. Even by yourself, your thoughts start to darken with the hour. It’s as if a switch flips inside your brain every time the sun sets, reminding you of every terror that could await you out in the Maze and every guilt you carry over not being a perfect Glader due to your recent arrival.
Plus, the darkness makes it easier for certain things to happen, things that nobody would dare attempt during the broad daylight. You’re sure that most boys here are actually quite normal, or so Newt says, but there are a few that make you uneasy. During the day, those boys are forced to leave you be, but they’re cloaked in shadows once night falls. You can’t get in trouble for something nobody sees, and it’s hard to see anything at all at a late hour like this.
The daily activities of the Glade are hard enough that you really need to get your sleep, but you can’t seem to shut your eyes longer than a few minutes at a time. Your mind refuses to grow calm, instead keeping you awake by running through simulations of all the worst things that could happen to you. You jump at the slightest of noises, and grow stressed at the smallest of movements.
You try to force yourself to relax back into your hammock, but no sooner have you made up your mind that you’re actually going to sleep do you see something. It’s the figure of a boy, one that first draws your attention at the far end of the sleeping area but slowly drifts closer to you.
A cloud shifts across the moon, and a beam of light casts itself upon the face of the boy. With a chill, you realize that you recognize him. The guy’s name is Paul, he’s been on your nerves ever since you arrived. He has this sense of entitlement that he wears like a king’s finest silks, truly believing that the world should scrape at his feet.
This entitlement only continues to you. Paul is one of the boys that makes you afraid to be alone, and the fact that he’s steadily drawing closer to you only worsens things. He’s near enough now that you can see his face well even in the shifting moonlight, and what you see terrifies you. His eyes are firmly fixed on you, the expression written in them almost hungry. His lips draw back in a grin, but it’s not happy, just pleased that he’ll finally be getting what he wants.
It strikes you now, how this situation could turn ugly. Everybody around you is sound asleep, so tired out by the day’s work that they wouldn’t awaken at a few footsteps. As if sensing your worries, Paul locks eyes with you, and gloatingly holds up one finger to his lips. He knows what you’re thinking, you realize, and he’s going to do exactly that.
Your heart spikes with horror as Paul calmly walks nearer to you. He’s taking his time, so sure that he won’t be caught that he’s enjoying himself. Paul is a Builder, too, he’s far stronger than you even if you put up a fight. Frantic, you look around you, and notice that Newt is in the hammock beside you.
You reach over and shove his shoulder as hard as you can, whispering his name under your breath as loudly as you dare. You don’t want to wake the others, too afraid of what Paul’s friends would do if they discovered what was going on, but you trust Newt to save and not damn you. You always have.
Paul’s footsteps quicken when he realizes what you’re trying to do, but one last desperate rap on Newt’s arm and the blond boy is up. He rubs a tired hand over his eyes, opening his mouth to blearily ask what you’re doing when he catches sight of Paul looming over you.
Instantly, Newt is on his guard. “What are you doing, Paul?”
You don’t know that you’ve ever heard Newt sound like this, so dangerously even. His tone is as cold as a dagger, and you swear you can see Paul start to bleed even before the Builder’s eyes widen.
Paul starts to stammer. “Uh, nothing. Just walking. Couldn’t sleep.”
Newt sits up, the moonlight revealing more of his body. The sleeves of his shirt are cut short, showing off his arms. Newt may not have the sheer bulk of a Builder, but he’s not weak either. If he wanted to, he could pack a mean punch.
Paul must realize that he’s caught, because he starts shuffling away again, a haunted look in his eyes. Once he’s gone, you turn back to Newt.
“Sorry to wake you up,” you whisper, “but I didn’t like where that was going.”
Newt shakes his head firmly. “Don’t apologize, Y/N. Jeez, what a slinthead that guy was. I’ll talk to Alby in the morning, see if we can get Paul thrown in the Slammer for trying that stunt. I don’t like to think about what might have happened if you hadn’t been awake long enough to see him coming.”
You don’t like the thought of it either, and even the promise of justice for Paul doesn’t stop you from shivering despite the warm night air. It all feels too close, the threat of unnameable violence too real. You’re supposed to be only fearing the Maze like the rest of the Gladers, for goodness’ sake, not the other boys.
Newt must be able to tell that you’re still terrified, because his expression softens and he holds an arm out to you. “Come over, Y/N. You can sleep with me in my hammock for now. That way we know for sure that no one else will try anything tonight.”
You have to admit, the thought of not being alone for the rest of the night does sound awfully good, but some part of you still hesitates. “I don’t want to keep you up any longer,” you hedge, but Newt doesn’t seem to mind.
“I’ll be fine, trust me. Unless you want nothing to do with any more boys,” he says, eyes starting to widen at the fear that you might think him no better than any of the other watchers, “In that case, feel no need to do anything of the sort.”
You laugh quietly, and watch as Newt’s tension leaves him in a wave. “I think that sounds perfect. Don’t worry about a thing.”
Newt’s smile returns, and that’s all the motivation you need to carefully climb out of your hammock and into his. The hammock is small enough that the two of you are pressed against each other, Newt’s arm draped casually around you back to pull you closer. His chest is still sleep-warm, and your head drops against his collarbone as if it were made to be there. Your last thought is that you don’t think you’ve ever felt so content in your life, and then you’re asleep.
You wake feeling more rested than you have since the day you showed up in the Glade. For a moment, you forget where you are, and then you feel Newt softly stirring against you and remember everything. It’s about half an hour before the rest of the boys get up, so no one has seen the two of you together, but you know enough to make mysterious heat rise to your cheeks.
Newt has woken up too, and he props himself up on one arm, raising a drowsy arm to push messy strands of golden hair away from his face. “Sleep well?” He asks, voice softened from sleep.
You smile. “Perfectly well. Thanks for letting me stay with you.”
Newt looks down at you softly, as if he never wants to look away. For some reason, his stare doesn’t seem nearly as hard a weight to carry as those of the other Gladers.
“No problem,” he murmurs, “you’ve never been a burden.”
For some reason, you feel the need to look away. It’s all just a little too much at once, and it’s too early in the morning for you to properly put into words how much you’re feeling at this moment. Newt must notice this, because he hurriedly mentions something about how you’d probably better get back into your hammock so no one suspects anything.
You try not to feel sad about him kicking you out, but one glance at him as you pull yourself out of his arms cures you of anything. Newt still looks at you like the first flower of the spring, and that sight alone lets you leave your worries behind.
You’re still thinking about that night well into the morning, and when it comes time for the lunch break, you scarcely even notice the stares of the other boys. There was some reason, surely, why Newt is always so willing to help you, why his mere presence feels like enough to keep you safe against any threat.
You’re so lost in thought that you almost don’t notice one of the Gladers stalking towards you across the center field. Newt may be the person you trust the most, but Alby, too, is someone you’ve never feared. Of course, that could be the fact that Alby’s so busy trying to make sure the Glade doesn’t run itself into the ground that he scarcely has time to look at you, but you still have faith in him anyway.
You’re fully expecting Alby to walk right past you and go deal with another problem on his list of thousands, but instead, he takes a seat next to you, all but throwing himself down with relief at what must be the first time he’s not standing since dawn.
You arch a brow at the boy, but Alby starts speaking of his own accord within a few seconds. “I want you to know that I was talking with Newt, and we’ve agreed that Paul should face punishment for what he tried to do last night. Even if we don’t know for sure that he was going to do anything, he was acting suspicious, and at any rate it’ll be a good example for the rest of these hoodlums that they need to stay clear of trouble.”
You nod slowly, but Alby isn’t done. “Also, I need to talk to you about Newt.”
You sit a little straighter, feeling oddly nervous although you’re not sure why. “What about Newt?” You ask cautiously.
Alby’s eyes lock on yours. “Listen, Newt has been my second in command for a long time, and for good reason. He’s one of the only actually good guys we have here. For that reason, he deserves happiness far more than the rest of us. That’s why I need to talk to you.”
He breaks off, looking at you expectantly. You’re not entirely sure what he wants you to say.
“Newt is a great guy,” you say hesitantly, “but I don’t really know what you want me to do about that.”
Alby sighs. “I don’t want to betray his confidence, but Newt likes you. That’s been obvious for a while, but I wouldn’t say a thing if I wasn’t sure that you like him too. Look, just talk to him about it, alright? I don’t want my friend tearing himself to pieces over you if he doesn’t have to.”
You lean back, startled. “What are you talking about? Newt doesn’t like me. And I, uh, don’t like Newt. Not like that.”
You’re not sure that you do a good job of convincing either of you, though.
Alby actually smiles for the first time since you’ve seen him. “Yeah, sure. Just talk to him. See what happens.”
With that, he stands up again, heading towards a group of Bricknicks arguing over the best way to fit supplies into an already stuffed storage shed. Alby’s work may never be done, but you think you can help him with at least one thing.
Newt is just starting his noon break when you find him. It’s easy enough to ask Newt to talk and lead him away from the rest of the Track-Hoes, but it’s far harder to actually come up with the right words to say once you’re alone. To his credit, Newt has never made you feel awkward, but it’s difficult to tell him that you think you might love him if you’ve only actually realized it about ten minutes ago.
At last, you give up on pleasantries and decide to just get the whole thing over with. “Newt, I”ve been thinking.”
Newt hazards a joke. “Always a good thing, from what I hear.”
You make a face at him, which makes him smile. “Stop that. Anyways, I was thinking. Thinking about us.”
Newt cocks his head to the side. “What does that mean?”
You groan. “Well, I could tell you if you stopped interrupting me.”
Newt grins. “My bad. Go on, then. What about us?”
You take a slow breath, then continue. “What if we could be more than just, you know, friends? I mean, I didn’t even realize it until recently, but last night, you made me feel more safe than anyone ever has, and I really like being with you all the time, and–”
You’re cut off by Newt gently kissing you. The stress of trying to find the right words leaves you in a rush, and what you’re left with is calm, pure and simple. It’s the sort of calm you always feel around Newt, the kind of feeling that makes you realize that you are going to be alright.
When you look up at him, Newt is smiling. “I’ve been wanting to hear you say that since the day you showed up here, you know that?”
You laugh. “There’s no way you’ve liked me that long.”
“Of course there is,” he says, “you made it very easy to like you. You always have.”
There’s another feeling you’re coming to associate with loving Newt, a sort of heat in your cheeks and butterflies in your stomach that makes you feel lighter than air. You feel it now, and you’re fairly sure that you’re going to feel it for a long time to come. Loving Newt is the easiest thing in the world. It’s a good thing that he feels the exact same way.
# summary — in which charles takes his annoyance out on people, this time it was his photographer and media manger who he has a crush on, y/n
# disclaimer — this is a snippet of my fanfiction on wattpad ! if you want to read it, i’ll be publishing it soon under bangmealready ! it’s called dress :)
“LEWIS HAS BEEN GETTING A LOT OF ATTENTION with his outfits lately.” y/n spoke as she scrolled on her phone through twitter, reading the various positive responses one of their mutual friends had been receiving.
charles, too deep in his thoughts and annoyance, only hummed in response, as he had been doing for the entirety of the conversation y/n had been leading. gradually, she was starting get irritated with him but she remained calm.
y/n understood why charles was acting the way that he was, unlike most people on the paddock. his pr team was trying to force him into a false relationship with some model to promote her fashion show, and with him being the heartthrob that he is, it was perfect.
but it wasn’t, really. for now y/n had to deal with a grumpy charles and the twitter fans were hungry, starving almost, for new charles content.
y/n was very strict with her boundaries and she voiced those to her employer. she wanted to make things on the internet lighthearted and fun for the fans, her and both drivers. she liked to post pictures she had taken of them with her professional camera and add out of pocket captions to get some laughs out of fans, so far she was succeeding. she thought the sport was already serious enough and with the continuous problems ferrari was having, some lighthearted jokes were necessary.
so yes, it was a problem if charles wasn’t happy, because y/n wouldn’t be happy and if she wasn’t delivering, the fans would also not be happy.
she wasn’t one to give up easily, though, “we could try that.” y/n looked up from her phone, frowning when she saw the monégasque’s spaced out face whilst biting his lower lip in deep thought. “charles.” she whispered with empathy, succeeding in breaking him out of his worries as their eyes connected, much like her fingers intertwining to his. “as i was saying, we could try that, but less extravagant like him, just add more chicness with accessories perhaps.” y/n continued, her voice soft.
the man before her took a deep breath and sighed, closing his eyes as another hum left his mouth. he didn’t want to snap at her, or say the wrong thing so he decided being silent was the best way. charles didn’t want to get vulgar with the only person who understood him and his ways. y/n was patient with him, more than anyone else and he didn’t want to mess that up.
it was no secret that charles was a guy that was very in touch with his emotions and not afraid to show them, but anger was something he did not want people to see him feel when the sun set and the moon shone brightly, when day turned into night and the curtains hid him away from the flashing lights. but he couldn’t help and feel irritated that people had no regards for his feelings and wanted to exploit him and force him into a relationship with a girl he’s never heard of before, a relationship that would have no benefits for him or his career.
charles was dissatisfied with himself for letting people walk all over him and he seemingly couldn’t fight back.
y/n spoke up after a while, disappointment clearly running through her for she couldn’t succeed in lifting his spirits. “i think you need a minute, i’ll see you after your training.” as she was about to stand up and walk away, charles tightened his grip on her hand, silently begging her to stay as his eyes welled up with waves that he didn’t want to let crash into the shore. y/n looked at him and her heart ached with sadness as he looked drained, his glossy doe eyes staring back at her, pleading.
“hey,” she whispered, bending down to her knees so she could look up at him, their eyes licking in a hypnotizing trance as she let go of his tight grip to cradle his face into her hands so she could redirect his sight back on her. “would you please talk to me? you don’t have to but i like hearing your voice, c.”
charles’ heart rate fastened at her touch, his body visibly relaxing above her. “sorry.” he finally whispered, it wasn’t much but for y/n it was enough.
“it’s okay.” y/n smiled slightly in triumph, happy to have made at least a little bit of progress with him. he leaned his head forward so their foreheads could touch, both of their eyes closing and taking in the moment of peacefulness and comfort. at the feeling of her relaxing beneath him, charles grinned, their heartbeats synchronizing as an invisible string tied them together, unknowingly to them.
out there was a world, bigger than anything they have explored but in that moment their feelings were bigger, their hearts grew fonder and their physique ached stronger in insatiable desire for one another.
charles couldn’t hold back any longer, he realized as he opened his eyes and watched her enthralling self enjoy his presence as much as he enjoyed hers. she felt his warmth leaving but had no time to exclaim her protest as his lips joined her forehead, his ring covered hands holding her face lovingly as both of them basked in that instant.
for the first time that day, charles felt content, every negative bone in his body turning positive as she brought out the best in him. he would make sure that he wouldn’t let y/n slip through his fingers like many other things had, charles promised himself.
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