Is being drained an erotic experience? is it supposed to feel good? How can I learn how to do it or enjoy it? What makes it fun or sexy, if it is?
Is being drained an erotic experience?
It certainly is for me. I get a great amount of alpha buzz every time that I see fagcash deposited in my accounts. I never expected findom to be as erotic to me as it is. I would read about it on others’ blogs and get such a vicarious high from it, but I wasn’t sure that I wanted to engage in it in the same way others did. Eventually I found the approach that worked for me and that has really elevated my happiness with the experience,
is it supposed to feel good?
I have several subs who cum just from tributing. They get headfucked throughout the day with draining and after some particularly hard tributes, they’ll bust a hands-free nut all over the place. It’s very exciting to watch and encourage.
Others are less erotic about their service. They prefer being more of an available ATM/servant, rather than making the experience specifically sexual. They also feel good about the activity, but I think their enjoyment is a bit more cerebral than physical.
Some doms build their dynamic around shame/fear/humiliation/blackmail. This isn’t really my approach, so I can’t speak much on it or how those subs feel.
All power play should feel good at some point. Whether that’s during the play, afterward, or whatever, the sub should have positive feelings about the experience. Anything else is dangerous abuse.
How can I learn how to do it or enjoy it?
As always, finding the right fit with your dom is paramount. Just like bondage or breath play, or flogging, findom is a skill and power play in general is a skill. You have to find the findom that works for what is going to tap in to the part of your brain that needs to be poked. That’s the only way to enjoy it.
Transactions alone are not sexy. The layering, control, reinforcement and power of the dom is what makes it sexy. The exchange of power is what is sexy. Not the money itself. Find the right dom and you can enjoy anything.
What makes it fun or sexy, if it is?
This is my personal theory.
Money is one of the most taboo subjects we have in the modern world. Particularly in America, what you do and what you earn are a major part of your identity. We regularly refer to consumers by their “purchasing power”. We talk about finances in terms of “leverage”. Money is an analog of real power. As real as confidence. As real as muscle. As real as education. It’s a way to control and be controlled.
A police officer with ultimate authority at his job can go to a car dealership and lose all power when his finances are laid out. Conversely, a janitor can go to the same dealership and be treated powerfully because of his bank accounts.
There is a real, physical, permanent power exchange in giving your money to someone, simply because you worship and obey them. There is incredible power exchange in self-sacrificing quality of life in order to see someone you lionize live an even more superior life. It’s a choice you make daily that truly puts you in a position of service.
The sexiness comes from the taboo nature of it. From the permanence. From the vicarious living of your life through the happiness of someone else. It’s heady stuff.
I’m not the ultimate authority on these experiences. I’d love to hear input from:
@fordjordan
@serviceisgolden
@nakedboyservant
@butlerboi
@anothercashfag
