Stories ages 3 & up

Tales worth keeping the light on for

[themanwithnoboo]

Calm down cat

Crashing through the cat flap, skidding on the floor Knocking over soldiers still scattered by the door. Diving under cushions, scratching at the sofa Hissing at the shadows, eyes glazing over. Calm down cat.

Rushing up the staircase, between the baby clothes, Sticking out his whiskers, his ears and busy nose. Leaping in the air with apparent magic powers, Playing with the broken feather and bouncy ball for hours. Calm down cat!

Jumping at the window, swatting at the flies, Spots a sudden bird in flight, tracks it with his eyes. Scares himself with a tail flick and falls onto the couch, Rolls about in washing piles, slips off and scratches and - OUCH! CALM DOWN CAT!

Scoffing all his biscuits, knocking over water, Jumping on the table between colouring book and daughter. Stopping for a moment, pausing at our feet, Eyes look sleepy suddenly, curled between us nice and neat. A calmed. down. cat.

[themanwithnoboo]

Super sticky spider spit

He catches flies and bugs and bees With homemade glue on his eight hairy knees. He can even over haul a tree, With stuck on ropes to pull them free. For a tiny spider to do this would be impossible, of course. Unless your name is Derek, and you had a secret force. See Derek is an arachnid, with powers like no others. His webs can capture cattle (he traps them by the udders). They’ve won him fame and glory at the spider championships, Where he shows off all his spider skills and expert marksmanship. Like capturing a buffalo without having to even move, Or lassoing herds of rhino when he’s feeling in the groove. How does he do it? You may ask - he has no special kit! His secret? Well, that’s easy: It’s his super sticky spider spit….

[themanwithnoboo]

The worst Fairy

She is the worst Fairy. Her last spell turned the pond-frogs blue, and the one at Breakfast turned the butter to glue. She is the Worst fairy. She wakes up the kids when she takes away their teeth, they sneeze on her pixie dust, as she slides the coin beneath. She is the worst fairy. She gets chased along the reids of grass, by angry wasps she happens to pass. She is the worst fairy. Her hair gets tangled amongst her wings and the gnomes hold their ears when she shrieks instead of sings. She is the worst Fairy.

[themanwithnoboo]

The Stinky Fish Witch

"Eels!" She screams at the passing crowd, her mother would have been so proud. You see she's not the first conjurer to make this her way of life... There was uncle Herbert, he smelled of Turbot, and then there was his wife. Aunt Sally who rode a horse-shaped broomstick around her witch's paddock, In case you'd not remembered, Sally reeked of Haddock. Her cauldron pal was Witchy Liz, she'd trained to be a surgeon, But get down wind and all you got was a face full of stinky Sturgeon. Crazy Em, for her: sardines - she'd hide them up a pole, And cousin Phil would make you ill, cos he bathed with Dover sole. There was Alexander, for him salamander held no fears or doubt, But never was there scarier than Anne of Bulgaria - she'd bash you with a trout. Salmon Rob just did his job to scare the boys and girls, And the Witch Simone used Herring bone, to hold her hair in curls. You see the family have history, a fishy one at that. No sooner were they spoon fed, they chose their carp or sprat. Their odour bowled you over in a moments nose hair twitch, And although her name was Mary, she'd always be the Stinky Fish Witch...

[themanwithnoboo]

ROBOTS OR DINOSAURS?

Robots

[themanwithnoboo]

The undercover duck

He sits along the bathtub.That is what he does. Watching all the bubbles burst against his plastic fuzz. The boat without the sailors brings suspicion to the tub, The soap dish that is empty, the sponge that's for the scrub. He sees it all, cos that's his job, to watch without a sound, His presence is the essence as the others play and clown. He's not so dim, to be distracted by all the splash and splosh. Not taken in by wind-up fish, nor action figure mosh. No. He'll hide amongst the bottles of unused soapy muck, He'll catch them in the act. He's the undercover duck.

[themanwithnoboo]

The Tin Can Man

Once upon a time in a tin can shed, Lived a tin can man with a tin can head. A tin can body wearing tin can clothes, With his tin can feet and his tin can toes.

In the tin can shed , lived a handmedown Teddy, He was friends with the ‘man and his name was Freddy. Freddy had his fur made of rag doll hair, With a sewn on smile that was no longer there.

Freddy had a friend that decided not to speak. Because his voice had no quack , And his quack had no beak. The bear tried to listen but he never had the luck, So he stared out the window with the broken rubber duck.

Up upon the shelf next to half forgotten paint, Sat the last of the rats with a culinary complaint. It seems that the rabbits had ran off with his cheese, To give it to the mice they were eager to please.

As they ran down the broomstick, they knocked off the candles That rolled towards the soldiers that were balanced on the handles. The men went to war with the half sunk navy, Whose rusted toy sails hung broken and wavy.

The cannons on the decks made the mothballs fly But they landed on the mice and caught Freddy in the eye. The duck would have shouted at the soldiers to just “stop!” But instead came only dust as his squeaker just went ‘pop’.

But as the dust settled and the mice began to lunch, The rabbits, back from digging, carried carrots in a bunch, And over in the corner sat the man made of tin, And he smiled from each corner of his tin can grin.

[themanwithnoboo]

The Tin Can Man