The Oklahoma Review

The Oklahoma Review is a product of the English Department at Cameron University in Lawton, OK. We publish a biannual online magazine of creative fiction, nonfiction, and poetry from writers worldwide.

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Fall 2013 Issue Out Now

Three Television Shows About Familial Love by James Brubaker

1 | A Father’s Love

This elimination-style, reality television show finds several contestants competing for the love of a father. This is neither the actual father of any of the contestants, nor an almighty Father—it is simply a man who happens to be a father. The contestants compete in challenges such as making breakfast for The Father, buying Father’s Day gifts for The Father, playing sports with The Father, working on car engines with The Father, bathing The Father, bringing The Father his pornographic magazines when he is in the bathroom, reading the newspaper to The Father, massaging The Father’s feet, bringing home an appropriate significant other who pleases The Father, agreeing with The Father’s political beliefs, appreciating the significance of The Father’s generation’s contributions to society, making things out of wood for and with The Father, not telling anyone when you see The Father ogle waitresses, cleaning The Father’s collection of Civil War memorabilia, painting a cubist portrait of The Father, siding with The Father when he talks about all the times his wife cheated on him, carving dice out of bone for The Father, and helping The Father inside and to bed when he comes home drunk and throws up on the porch. At the conclusion of each episode, The Father selects one contestant and dismisses him or her by saying, “I’m very disappointed in you.” In the pilot episode, the contestants are invited to a formal dinner where they meet The Father for the first time. There is no formal contest in this first episode, but The Father decides to dismiss a male contestant who refrains from ordering an alcoholic beverage despite The Father’s insistence. After the young man leaves the dinner table, The Father says, “Never trust a man who won’t drink with you. Men like that, they will always find ways to make you feel bad about yourselves.” The show’s finale features the final three contestants eulogizing The Father at a mock funeral, after which The Father selects the son or daughter he loves most as the winner.

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