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To my baby girl, Adryana
To my baby girl, Adryana
Dear Adryana,
You’re off to high school, a new chapter in your life. God, where did the time go? They told me it would be fast, but I didn’t think it would come by this freaking fast! I remember your first day of Pre-K, your first day of first grade and all the other years that came after that. On this day though, I feel incredibly proud to be your mama and I’ll tell you why…
Although, you were…
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I recently read that model, Gigi Hadid, has Hashimoto’s Disease. Then I thought, well that’s it, I’m a supermodel basically… well not exactly… But I do have this disease.
Read on this link to understand my condition and remember not to body shame anyone. You never know what is going on with anyone and what battles they have.
For me, it is extremely difficult to handle losing/gaining weight, feeling tired and cold all the time, and losing my hair by the handfuls. I don’t expect everyone to care, but I’d like for people to understand the condition. These are just a few of the symptoms that I experience. I’ll also note that because this is an autoimmune disease, I am prone and far more susceptible to other autoimmune diseases.
If there’s one thing I know, it’s that communication with others gives us knowledge and wisdom. As an aside: I try to take away a bit of knowledge from every conversation I have (even if it’s just an observation). I certainly do NOT know it all. Though there was a point in my life where I thought I did, sorry Mom!
It was through conversation with my cousin Yvonne 10+ years ago that I learned about thyroid symptoms. I told her how I was feeling and she urged me to get blood work and talk to my Dr. about checking my TSH and T4 levels. Off I went, to get tested for this “Hypothyroid” issue. When my labs came back, my Dr. called me and asked me how I was still functioning. The levels were literally so bad, he said I needed to get on medicine right away.
I was so happy to hear that my symptoms stemmed from something other than just having had a baby. I thought my literal weakness was just me failing to adapt to having a second baby. Deep down, I refused to accept that. When I say literal, I mean not being able to physically pick up my child. As if my limbs, muscles and brain could not communicate, leaving me uncoordinated and unfit . I felt sleepy all the time. I had started going to the gym and working out on a regular basis, could that be why I feel so tired?. I started to eat clean and do the best version of a diet that a nursing mom could do. Was I not eating the right things? I was determined to lose the baby weight. I thought that how I felt, was a result of me trying to do ALL the things and be super mom. It wasn’t. And I was glad.
Almost 11 years later and my body still can’t get a grip on handling my thyroid levels. I recently sought out a new Endocrinologist. She is amazing and we are solving this puzzle together. I am feeling better these days having now switched medicine. Ironically, Layla also was diagnosed with hypothyroidism a few years ago. My little middle, who triggered my condition (cuz pregnancy can do that) ended up having it as well. It’s funny how things work out sometimes.
Through this, I have learned:
1- To be grateful for my health and the ability to afford healthcare and medicine (because this is a part of me for LIFE).
2- To have empathy. There are many others with this condition and many others with worse conditions. (diseases do not discriminate)
3- To accept that I cannot control everything and to take charge of the things I can
I have Hashimoto’s Disease- Holy Crud I recently read that model, Gigi Hadid, has Hashimoto's Disease. Then I thought, well that's it, I'm a supermodel basically...
As working parents, we sometimes go through the week full of stress. By the time Friday comes around, the hubby and I are texting each other #TGIF, wine memes, and crazy GIFs of people dancing at work. It’s on these days that we get to celebrate being together and having a little down time. Can I get an Amen?! Surely we are not the only ones that do this right?
As we drove the girls to their ballet classes last week, I lost it on my teenager. I immediately felt bad because generally speaking, I don’t yell at my kids. I choose to speak to them about how I feel and let them have a chance to have their own opinions and voice their concerns.
The real reason I lost it was because: one- I had a headache and two- I was exhausted and couldn’t handle any more of the admin duties my family expected me to handle. You guys already know I work full time, have a part-time side business, and attend online classes. Top that off with full time administrative assistant, personal chef, uber driver, tutor, and personal shopper to Daddy Reyes, Teenage Daughter, The Little Middle and Bud (FYI I’ve called Sebastian “Bud” all his life, This Is Us just happened to steal it from me). The questions just kept coming and coming until I finally just took out my phone, looked up an email, and just said “read the email”. This was my way of saying I’m tired and you can find what you need here on this email. My teenager read the email and continued to ask me questions.
Mom: I don’t know. If there is anything else that you need to know you can ask your teachers when we get there.
Teenager: They said we needed pictures and we need to register to audition.
Mom: Where did you hear this? Who told you this? I only know what I read in the email.
Teenager: So do I need to do that?
Mom: I don’t know! Didn’t you just read the same email I read? I only know what was in the email. It stated nothing about pictures! I can’t tell you what I don’t know but if you KNOW what you need to do, why are you asking me? I just don’t understand. Your teachers are there for you. You can ask questions when you are not sure of things. You have a mouth and you can speak! Therefore, you can ask. You need to learn how to be resourceful Adry. I’m not always going to be here doing all these things for you. What will happen when you go away to college? What will happen when I’m not around?
I admit I blew up on her. I will always be here for my kids as long as God allows me to. I just meant that I will not always be present in the moments when she will have questions. I will not always be the buffer to her shyness. There was so much silence in the car. Even my husband didn’t say a word. I thought, “Good, he’s on my side”.
We pulled up to the school and rather than apologize (I am her mother above all), I simply explained that I was exhausted and that we needed to be mindful of each other. I do so much for my family. I sometimes feel like that gets lost (when this happens, I quickly remind them). I am allowed to be tired. I am not ashamed of that. We are given a pass sometimes. We are not perfect as mothers, we are human too.
We made our peace and I also explained to her that at some point in her life, figuring things out will be her responsibility. I am simply trying to teach her that now. It will give me peace of mind in the long run. I offered to go into the school with her to figure things out together. Our questions were answered and we both learned a lesson. All I know is, tough love is good love when given for the right reasons.
Tough Love is Good Love…Right? As working parents, we sometimes go through the week full of stress. By the time Friday comes around, the hubby and I are texting each other #TGIF, wine memes, and crazy GIFs of people dancing at work.
It's safe to say that these kids had a great Christmas 2017. I know I did and we even started a new tradition. . Last night we gifted them notebooks. I wanted to see their reaction to such a simple gift. I didn't know what to expect. I know I have good kids. They are kind and their hearts are pure. . . They weren't upset. In fact, they opened them and just looked a bit confused. So I explained to them that I would like for them to use the books for journaling, the first entry, however, had to be to write all of the things they are grateful for in order to be able to open up their presents Christmas morning. . . They did it without any complaints and this morning they recited what they wrote. It made my Christmas (along with the massage chair they gifted me). I am grateful for them. They make me so proud. . . . #blessed #momof3 #christmasblessings #merrychristmas #ilovemybabies
Merry Christmas everyone!
When Lala requested Christmas tree hair, mom obliged. This little girl is a BOSS. . Let me tell you why... She is the kind of girl that does what she wants and doesn't let you discourage her. She is strong willed and determined to make things work. . She isn't bothered by anyone's opinions and rocks this out with confidence. All she wants is to make her peers smile. . We can learn so much from our kids. I'm lucky to be her mom. . . . . . #proudmama #laylamariah #momof3 #mylittlemiddle #christmashair #crazyhairstyle #kidsofinstagram
Our greatest natural resource is in the minds of our children- Walt Disney . Words of wisdom to live by . I can't keep track of how many times we laugh in our home, because it's frequent and hard . In our home, we teach our kids to dream big and explore options, it's the only way they will grow . All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them-Walt Disney #ilovedisney #welovedisney #laylamariah #brilliantkids #kidsofinstagram
Just so proud of my babies, who are exhausted and sleeping in this morning. The Nutcracker is truly such a magical show to see. You have probably heard all of the classic music around the holidays from this show and don't even realize it. #proudmama
Siblings are a joy to watch grow up. Through ups and downs, they love each other and as a mom, it makes me so proud to call them mine. Adryana, Layla and Sebastian, may God bless you and may you guys share this loving friendship always. #siblings
Tis the season... for matching PJ's. I just love this time of year and now that the kids are growing, they still appease their momma by wearing matching PJ's. #targetstyle #bashsmash #laylamariah #adryanakarina #familypjs
And let’s not even get started with the Elf on the Shelf! My kids are now 13, 10, and 8. They have discovered that Santa is aka Mom and Dad. So this year, it feels like a heavy weight has been lifted, and we finally can be 1,000 percent honest with the kids. It’s such a wonderful feeling. The wrapping has begun and the presents are under the tree and everyone is fine.
Don’t get me wrong, to those with little ones out there, I feel ya. I had to keep everything top secret and hide things here and there and it was almost stressful. The thought of Santa and the cute little Elf on the Shelf was also adorable. However, not having to look on Pinterest for ideas on where to place the darn things and stage the deviousness is such a relief. Kudos to the mommas who have to continue the tradition! It was a great run for me while it lasted.
We all end up in different stages of parenthood as our kids get older. I enjoy every second we get to create memories. In the end, that is what we are left with. The kids and I can now laugh at the silly things that I did to conceal the big secrets in their upbringing. It kind of makes me sad that they have figured it all out. I will miss the days when they believed in Santa, the Tooth Fairy, etc. One thing that all this has taught me though is that those are the little things and the big picture is that the holidays are magical regardless. Making memories and having fun and enjoying our family is what really matters. I absolutely love that the kids get it too!
Happy Holidays,
Monica
What do you mean there’s no Santa? And let's not even get started with the Elf on the Shelf! My kids are now 13, 10, and 8.
And let’s not even get started with the Elf on the Shelf! My kids are now 13, 10, and 8. They have discovered that Santa is aka Mom and Dad. So this year, it feels like a heavy weight has been lifted, and we finally can be 1,000 percent honest with the kids. It’s such a wonderful feeling. The wrapping has begun and the presents are under the tree and everyone is fine.
Don’t get me wrong, to those with little ones out there, I feel ya. I had to keep everything top secret and hide things here and there and it was almost stressful. The thought of Santa and the cute little Elf on the Shelf was also adorable. However, not having to look on Pinterest for ideas on where to place the darn things and stage the deviousness is such a relief. Kudos to the mommas who have to continue the tradition! It was a great run for me while it lasted.
We all end up in different stages of parenthood as our kids get older. I enjoy every second we get to create memories. In the end, that is what we are left with. The kids and I can now laugh at the silly things that I did to conceal the big secrets in their upbringing. It kind of makes me sad that they have figured it all out. I will miss the days when they believed in Santa, the Tooth Fairy, etc. One thing that all this has taught me though is that those are the little things and the big picture is that the holidays are magical regardless. Making memories and having fun and enjoying our family is what really matters. I absolutely love that the kids get it too!
Happy Holidays,
Monica
What do you mean there’s no Santa? And let's not even get started with the Elf on the Shelf! My kids are now 13, 10, and 8.
#LalaandBash only 2 years apart and almost the same size. These 2 have the funniest relationship. Mostly love, but in the end they have each other's backs. #siblings #bigsisterlittlebrother #walkingtochurch
This little girl who stole our hearts 13 years ago is the best big sister, Ever! This morning I heard her reprimand her younger brother and I thought, wow, my job here is done! Who needs a mom when your sister can take over? What really surprised me was how much she really sounded like me. I love being their mom. #proudmama #adryanakarina #myfirstbaby
Spent the afternoon with my little middle Layla Mariah. Lots of laughs and silliness. This girl can brighten anyone's day with her laugh. I love being her mom. #laylamariah #mylittlemiddle #contagiouslaughter
Sunday Funday, Church Selfie. Growing up, we went to many churches of many denominations but never really stayed at one long enough to have sufficient Faith if any at all in any of them. That, along with the fact that many churchgoers I knew liked to criticize others, never sat well with me. Now that I have my own family, we choose to seek Faith. Allowing for ours to continue growing while fostering our children's faith as well. We acknowledge our blessings daily. #blessed #sundayfunday #raisingthereyes #praisethelord (at New Jersey)
#TBT because 8 years ago, these munchkins were adorable on Halloween 🎃❤😍