Chapter 1: Flashback #78
Last week, I woke up in a different country. It had different sounds. The city had different sirens and different drivers. There was different music. It smelled differently, too. Fresher somehow, and healthier. Breakfast smelled so different. The same scrambled eggs smelled so differently here than they did back home.
But there are some things that never change – no matter the location. The feelings were still there. I wasn’t surprised at the new country. I didn’t wake up in a daze, confused. It wasn’t strange or frightening, like being pulled out of a dream and thrown back into reality. But it was still painful. It was like waking up in a nightmare of emotions.
Waking up, but prepared, not surprised.
I woke up, and there it was sitting in my chest. The feeling of being alone. Abandoned.
It was very similar to waking up the night after you left me. I only slept an hour and the whole time I was asleep, I knew you would be gone. It was like watching a movie and knowing what will happen next because the background music just changed. The whole time I was asleep, I heard that tune. I heard it and I knew what was waiting when I opened the door to exit the dream.
And then when I opened my eyes, I only knew two words.
“He’s gone.”
This was the same. Just in a different country. In a different bed, with different sounds and different smells.
But I still woke up knowing only two words.
“He’s gone.”