HAVEN'T YOU HEARD ?

[theyadrastos]

hm

[chrisevansedits]

Chris Evans as Andy Barber in Defending Jacob (2020) // 1x05

[theyadrastos]

@theyadonis  !

    Shoes click loudly against the marble floors of the court house.    Noah offers nods to those he passes in the halls.    Two coffees warm his palms, his bag sits loosely on his shoulder, and bumps against his leg with every step he takes.    He enjoys the feeling, against his leg, the soft reminder of his lost love swims in the back of his mind.    His steps falter for a moment when he sees her step out into the hall.    She hasn’t noticed him, she’s busy on her phone, an email, probably.    As he approaches, he holds out the coffee for her.      ❛    Miss Emerson.    ❜      A smile graces his features.    Always keep a friendly face.      ❛    Your case went well, I presume  ?    ❜      He waits until her hand encloses around the cup.    Once he has a free hand, he turns, and they fall in step together.      ❛    I was hoping I could bend your ear on the Cartwell case.    You have a minute  ?    ❜

[futw]

[ghstmemes]

♡   THE GOOD PLACE   [  𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚂 𝚂𝟷:𝙴𝟷  ]

adult themes / language tw.   customize  as  you  need / wish !

Oh, one question. Where am I ? Who are you, and what’s going on ?

You are now in the next phase of your existence in the universe.

Cool. Cool. I have some questions.

Are you sure you want to hear it ?

You dropped a bottle of something called, “Lonely Gal Margarita Mix for One.”

Hey, what do you think happens after we die ?

I mean, we couldn’t believe what we were hearing.

Well, it’s not the heaven-or-hell idea that you were raised on.

There’s a lot of frozen yogurt places.

People love frozen yogurt. I don’t know what to tell you.

Ah, who cares ? No one is watching.

We were watching. Surprise !

What happens to everyone else, you ask ? Don’t worry about it.

Your true soulmate is here too.

That’s right. Soulmates are real.

You know the way you feel when see a picture of two otters holding hands ?

That’s how you are going to feel every day.

Wow, all those amazing people down there, it just seems so hard to believe.

Most people don’t make it here.

You’re special, ________.

Oh, oh, and, uh, of course, you love clowns, so…

I do love clowns.

________ ? I’m ________, and you are my soulmate.

Cool ! Bring it in, man.

This place just translates whatever you say into a language the other person can understand.

I have spent my entire life in pursuit of fundamental truths about the universe.

Now we can learn about them together, as soulmates.

It’s overwhelming.

________. You’ll stand by my side no matter what, right ?

Of course I will.

Promise me. Say, “I promise to never betray you for any reason.”

________, I swear that I will never say or do anything to cause you any harm.

There’s been a big mistake. I’m not supposed to be here.

Wait, what ?

They got my name right, but nothing else.

I mean, somebody royally forked up.

Why can’t I say “fork” ?

If you’re trying to curse, you can’t here.

So, if you’re not this person, then who are you ?

But I was very good at it.

You do get how that’s worse, right ?

Okay, well, maybe it’s not actually, like, all that bad.

Let’s just get some information first.

She’s like this walking database.

I guess (s)he just didn’t want to have sex with me.

Well, that’s fine, I wasn’t that into him/her anyway.

Oh, sorry, that’s the one topic I’m not allowed to tell you about.

Well, it doesn’t sound awesome.

All right, we need a plan.

I say we just lie low and hope that they don’t notice me.

I’m sorry, I don’t think I can help you.

I just don’t like being dishonest, and I can’t advise you to be dishonest either.

Come on, I’m just asking you to fudge a little bit.

I’m getting a stomachache.

It’s just so tiny and cute. It’s like a little child’s plaything, like for a family of mice or for a very fancy little dog.

I love it. It’s just so sweet and teensy.

You booped me. That’s fun.

My entire house could fit in this room.

I might not have been a saint, but it’s not like I killed anybody. I wasn’t an arsonist.

All I’m saying is these people might be “good,” but are they really that much better than me ?

Oh, forget it. Heading to the bar !

Oh, okay. Okay. I think it’s time to go home.

Wait, wait, wait. I just have to go upstairs real quick and steal a bunch of gold stuff.

Okay, don’t do that.

Did you fill your bra with shrimp ?

Whatever, it is freakin’ heaven.

At least I can still say “butthead”.

I’m sorry that you had to deal with this.

Maybe they are being used to torture each other. It would work.

‘Cause you’re a nice person. You’re a nice person, ________.

Well, that’s terrifying.

That can’t be good.

I have no idea why any of this is happening or how to control it.

Should we run away then ?

Why is everyone wearing blue and yellow ?

________, this is all happening because of you.

We don’t know this is because of me.

Actually, you’re a hammer, just smashing the gears into dust.

Oh, hang on. Not everybody here is perfect, okay ?

I’m not the only one with flaws.

Okay, fine, turns out there are many ways to know that it was me.

Let’s just face it, ________, you don’t belong here.

Well, then this system sucks.

I was a medium person.

Look, apparently it doesn’t work that way.

There is something we can do. Unless you could teach me.

[mcavoyjr]

“Amy, you can teach those people to hate me all you want I don’t care, I’m leaving you.”

Gone Girl (2014) Dir. David Fincher