Super Nintendo Chalmers

29… hundred years old. I write stuff and on occasion go out for brunch. And that’s all I gotta say about that. XOXO, Gossip girl.

[thisisnotahaiku]

My version of you is a wonderful man

in my daydreams you hold me close

and apologize over and over

my lips find yours

you catch mine with a feverish hunger

as if you are dying of thirst

and I am a glass of water

But you do not exist

You run your nose down my neck

You inhale my scent

You moan

I moan too

This never happened

You tell me our time apart was unbearable

“How did I live before you?”

You ask, with your mouth full of me

We go back to my home

Back to my bed

You show me everything left unsaid

When we are finished, you wrap your arms around me

And whisper in my ears until I fall asleep

[thisisnotahaiku]

You are mine for a single night

Did you know, did you know

The moon, she wanes and waxes

her craters gently deepen

her mountains keep on reaching

as she watches us through the blinds

You were mine for a single night

Do you remember, do you remember?

Our skins were honey

our mouths were bees

hungry for the feast

staving off sleep

You don’t know, you don’t care

That honey can freeze

that our skins are now stone

filled with fissures and cracks

longing for an unborn sun

to melt us back into pools

[thisisnotahaiku]

Oh Ramona’s in the walls

Waiting for a collect call

glass of wine sure looks friendly

shes going through a frenzy

Her head is buried in the sand

why can’t we understand ?

The bottles getting richer

And her livers getting sicker

Until the end

Until the end

Ramonas in the walls

Now she’s five hundred feet tall

As he gets another drink

that’s what she thinks

Freaking out her friends

They all think this is the end

She’s going through a frenzy

The bottles getting richer

But her livers getting sicker

Drunken Angels sing their hymns

She laughs and swings her hips (3x)

Until the end

Until the end

[thisisnotahaiku]

I’ve been so bad on good behavior

Where the hell’s my god damn savior

Look to the east look to the west

Turn around,he’s already left

I am blind, I am blind to your elusive truth

sister, sister tie me a golden noose

Break my neck inside a coin filled pool

I wanna shine and dive like I’m mcscrooge

There’s a veil on my face

suffocating all my good grace

the waves are high the end is nigh

pull me in closer into the tide

I gave you my soul for just a dollar

Now I can breathe under water

I am blind, I am blind to your elusive truth

sister, sister tie me a golden noose

break my neck inside a coin filled pool

I wanna shine and dive like I’m mcscrooge

I am not silenced by night in my face

my faith is treasured food for the grave

I am not silenced by his threats

Yet all of my own prayers are left unsent

now all my prayers are left unsent

Oh oh oh make me in your image

Just don’t show me when you’re finished

I am blind, I am blind to your elusive truth

sister, sister tie me a golden noose

break my neck inside a coin filled pool

I wanna shine and dive like I’m Mcscrooge

[thisisnotahaiku]

Pinch me by my inner thigh

Oh I really wanna testify

to how you left me in the dust

I wish I can lay here and rust

I am the sea and now I see

how things are and what could be

meet me on the shore (you’re sure?)

Oh meet me on the shore, I’m sure

You’ll swim in me and slam the door

I hear the sound across the town

It’s almost as loud as your frown

I wish that I could call it now

but I’m hanging on to hope

and I’m clinging to the rope

I am the sea and now I see

how things are and what could be

meet me on the shore (you’re sure?)

Oh meet me on the shore, I’m sure

I waded in the winding river

as you felt the faintest sliver

of sweet relief as you stayed dry

I’m wet wet wet about to cry

go on and dodge my puddles

here’s a penny for your troubles

I am the sea and now I see

how things are and what could be

meet me on the shore (you’re sure?)

Oh meet me on the shore, I’m sure

Oh meet me on the shore, I’m sure

Oh meet me on the shore, I’m sure

Oh meet me on the shore, I’m sure

[thisisnotahaiku]

Cracked clay cackles

yet rarely does it smile

I still hear the cold crackle

of its howl from time to time

Each syllable an unlit match

unsmoked echo of itself

I wander through the dry mass

my feet upon brittle coastal shelf

Make me in your image

just don’t show me when you’re finished

[thisisnotahaiku]

Freezer burn on my tongue

I got my lashings real well done

I’m on your floor, I’m in your fridge

pondering on all the things we did

Stick your hand out at the street light

wait for someone to tell you you’re right

for these 2 am dreams fill me with such -

melancholy and wistful huhs

I still wanna gaze into your jeweled eyes

and pretend that they’re still mine

Gaze into me, your loving soil

plant in me and watch it all grow

it may all twist and wither

and coil and shiver

but I’m your ground to tread upon

so behold! As I grow on and on

[thisisnotahaiku]

Sea foam sea foam pass me that stick

Oh Dear God, think I’m going to be sick

if you see me around town, tell me to slow down

if you see me in the sea, tell me to just be

Oh I wanna see my man

wanna see where exactly he stands

my feet ache to make new mistakes

don’t know how much longer I can fake

See the waves, how they take me away

See the grounds, how they’ve made me their mound

I am round, bouncing around town

I am a hill, sitting perfectly still

Oh I wanna see my man

wanna know how long he can stand

me and all of my mistakes

baby baby how much can you take?

[thisisnotahaiku]

Sea foam sea foam pass me that stick

Oh Dear God, think I’m going to be sick

if you see me around town, tell me to slow down

if you see me in the sea, tell me to just be

Oh I wanna see my man

wanna see where exactly he stands

my feet ache to make new mistakes

don’t know how much longer I can fake

See the waves, how they take me away

See the grounds, how they’ve made me their mound

I am round, bouncing around town

I am a hill, sitting perfectly still

Oh I wanna see my man

wanna know how long he can stand

me and all of my mistakes

baby baby how much can you take?

[thisisnotahaiku]

When the cracks formed, I didn’t know

how badly you really wanted to go

my feet stayed glued to the floor

as you headed out the door

I heard the slam and that was it

felt it in the root and in the pit

My deepest depths lost in darkness

they taught me what loss really is

I see you in the corner, around the bend

I got whiplash deep in my neck

the pain deepens with every spin

In my arms, you’re in a rut

In your arms, I am a nut

frantic for any meaning

are you there, are you hearing?

I am coarse, I am rough

I gotta know, was I enough?

I am sandpaper on your skin

Baby give me one more wince

[thisisnotahaiku]

You’re so “smart” and such a “catch”

but I see you now and I am not impressed

you keep your cards real close to the chest

Oh your uncertain stride and invisible tests

I may have failed but now I hail

over this land, as you sweetly bail

I was here left reeling, as you were reaching

for another woman, to put your little worm in

I go right, and you quickly go south

you move your mouth and gladly spit me out

Oh it was cold anyway, but it’s a real shame

I thought you were a better man

but now you’re just another sham

You say your wife left you

and I could hardly understand

but now I see why she ran and ran

from your unsteady trembling hand

[thisisnotahaiku]

You say the divine does not exist

yet still I wonder how I can fit

in your arms and in this bliss

put me, put me on the line

I’ll show you the true divine

hold me, hold me, hold me tight

through the tumble through the night

and to be blunt, to tell the truth

the sky is blue and so are you

Amongst the elves, amongst the dragons

wondering where I left my baggage

could it be here could it be there

I lost my mind along the stairs

I climb I climb I climb I climb I climb

my knees are weak and you are mine

[thisisnotahaiku]

She’s floating into space

ready for her next mistake

She takes she takes she takes

it is the bane it is the root

of something sweet something soon

she cackles cackles like a loon

In the trees and in the fruit

sorely searching for some food

death in all her crooked forms

is quite beyond the steady norm

she creeps and creeps as we lay asleep

she hardly ever makes a peep

When you’re here I’m all a flutter

when you’re gone I’m in the gutter

rotting rotting, calling for mother

but she is gone, just like last summer

[thisisnotahaiku]

All the roads you took before

slowly slamming into doors

I want more and I want more

What the hell you waiting for

Into the thick into the mist

searching for what’s sorely missed

I am slowly drifting in your abyss

Dreaming of the better days

when you said you would stay

keep pale fire at the bay

harshly shoot it into rain

[thisisnotahaiku]

Cuz I’m still stuck in a fantasy, yeah a fantasy

of what could be just you and me, yeah you and me

why is everyday filled with a new heartache?

when will I pass through this hard phase?

I guess I should go, just leave this alone

I guess I should go, and leave my new home

I guess I should go, leave these heavy bones

Your murky eyes are my eyesight

do you see if I’ll be alright?

for I am done with this great fight

for I try and I try and I try and I try

so hard to make myself realize

the extent of your lying eyes

[thisisnotahaiku]

Virginal blood on the fresh snow

that’s when you know you gotta go home

and I can tell you all the things you could be

but that still wouldn’t bring you home to me

let the tears fall for I’m still at your call

let the tears fall for I’m your pillar of salt

Oh you’re so nice and I’m so mean

I’ll stomp on you as you beg me

to ease off this pressure

but I’ll press harder and harder

Will you carry me down this mountain

that I’ve fallen damn so far in

will you roll me down this hill

before my heart becomes still

[thisisnotahaiku]

Woman woman woman woman woman

Made of silk and your dad’s disappointment

gliding over all, we’re all enthralled

you got broken pearls in your mouth

and refuse to spit the pieces out

They cut you up shard by shard

honey you aren’t going far

here’s to the blood

here’s to the mud

here’s to the tippy top of your love

It grows and grows in spirals

softly spinning for your guile

honey won’t you stay a while

stay by me for every mile