The Stories From Skeleton Crew: Ranked
The Jaunt - Probably the short story from King that people talk about the most, and for good reason. It is so original and thought provoking, it blows the other stories in this book out of the water. A family is being 'jaunted' to Mars, which is basically teleportation. The father tells the family the history of Jaunting while they wait and the son makes a decision right before their Jaunt that brings everything together in a shocking way.
The Ballad of the Flexible Bullet - The flexible bullet from the title refers to madness, and while there is quite a tale of madness at the center of this story, it is more a rumination on madness and what drives people, especially in the literary world towards madness. Hard to imagion King wasn't talking through his own issues here.
The Man Who Would Not Shake Hands - I love the world King created in his novella, The Breathing Method. This is another story told to The Club by one of the wealthy gentleman owners. The tale told within isn't quite as gripping as The Breathing Method, but we learn more about the Club and where it began in this short story.
Gramma - You know from the beginning that something is wrong with Gramma. King squeezes every amount of terror and suspense he can until we actually figure out what it is, even after Gramma...dies. King is a master at creepy and this is a perfect example.
Survivor Type - This is sort of a mashup of the madness of the Flexible Bullet and the creepiness of Gramma. A surgeon (of course he's a surgeon) gets marooned on an island and because he is not getting saved and there is no food or shelter, he makes the dyer decision to start amputating and eating the parts that he can live without. You can imagine what happens as King takes it farther and farther.
Nona - Creepy and supernatural, Nona is written by a man recounting a strange love affair with the titular character that landed him in prison, where he still resides. Nona convinces him through various means to kill people that get in their way and eventually leads to a cemetery where he is caught and she is never found. Was she ever there?
The Monkey - Recently turned into a movie, this is the story of a menacing toy monkey (the one where cymbals clash together when you wind it up). It keeps turning up around the main character even after he moves, buries it and destroys it.
Word Processor to the Gods - Word Processors may be of the time this was written, but with AI and technology going at breakneck speed, this is more precient than you'd think. A man who hates his life is given a processor by his inventor nephew . The man discovers what is typed into the device comes to life and what is deleted can be deleted in real life. For a man that hates his surroundings, that can be dangerous.
The Reaper's Image - classic set up by King of: is this scariness real or imagined. It concerns an antique dealer who goes to a museum to authenticate the Delver Mirror, which is rumored to show those who look in it the Grim Reaper. The collector scoffs the rumors, but notices duct tape on the mirror which would render it useless. As the curator explains there is nothing on the mirror, the collector feels the glass (with no tape) and then gets a good luck at the image in the mirror.
The Wedding Gig - This story is probably of its time, whether that's the time is was written (December 1980, the month I was born) or the time it takes place (American Prohibition). Vaguely about the mob, a man is hired to make fun of the bride at a wedding. The bride is near 300 pounds. She not only makes it out of this unscathed, she takes over the crew that was trying to ruin the marriage. So, it is this high for the revenge factor.
Mrs. Todd's Shortcut - Another story about obsession leading to madness, with a little supernatural sprinkled in. An old man at a gas station is being told the story of how Mrs. Todd became obsessed with shortcuts and eventually found one that made her younger, before she disappears one day. The old man takes the shortcut and does feel younger while seeing some strange things along the way.
The Reach - A perfect last story in the book, about the end of life. Stella has lived on an island just off the mainland her whole life without ever crossing 'the reach' of water between. When an ice storm freezes the Reach, she begins having visions of her long dead husband telling her to cross. She knows this is the end of her life but makes it her final mission to make it across before she dies.
Beachworld - Two astronauts are stranded on a planet almost entirely made of sand. One knows they most drink water to stay alive and wait for help. But the other starts to think he is one with the sand and refuses to drink or move. When help finally comes, the transformation is complete.
Big Wheels - a Tale of the Laundry Game - Two mean leave their job at a big laundry company, drink way too much beer and drive around. They need an inspection so they go to their old classmate's mechanic shop and bully him into giving them a passing inspection. As they leave, they have a run in with a milkman from a previous story, who also pays a visit to their friend at the mechanic shop.
The Raft - Four college kids swim out to the middle of a lake that is condemned and get stuck because there is a deadly creature trying to grab them. One by one, the students gets picked off. This story would be higher if all four of the characters weren't so unlikable.
Morning Deliveries - This is a deeply disturbing story of a milkman making his normal deliveries. Only Stephen King could make the describing of an idyllic summer morning seem so foreboding, because we know Spike, the delivery man is a bad dude, even before he starts poisoning the milk he is delivering.
Uncle Otto's Truck - This is the tail of two old business partners who are trying to decide if they want to sell and divide the profits. Otto's truck is on the property and he feels much more attached to the land than his partner George. The argument becomes heated and Otto murders George...with the help of his old truck.
Cain Rose Up - This begins the stories I didn't care for much at all. This is about a student at a college who deems himself judge, jury and executioner, sniping his fellow students out of his window. Even without all the school shootings that have happened since this came out, the story is pretty messed up.
Here There Be Tygers - I didn't get whatever point I was supposed to get from this story and it sets a weird tone as the first actual short-story in the book. A third grader goes to the bathroom, finds a tiger, real or imagined we're not sure. Then another student is sent to find him and eventually the teacher.
Paranoid: A Chant - This is a series of paranoid ramblings supposedly sent from the man that went crazy in the Flexible Bullet short story. Not a huge fan of series of paranoid ramblings, it turns out.
For Owen - This is a poem King wrote to his then very young son, Owen, who we now know as a writer of some note himself. The whole thing makes me uncomfortable with the forwardness, personalness and earnestness, knowing both of the participants. If I was Owen, I would forever be embarrassed by this. Hell, if I was King, I would be embarassed.
I should note: I reviewed The Mist on it's own, so it is not included here. If it was, it would be 1 or 1a with the Jaunt. Overall, I did not appreciate this collection near as much as Night Shift.