Hiiiii darling!! I have some requests that randomly popped up in my mind and I knew just the person to ask this to;) (You write your headcanons so fucking well, it's insane)
Anyway, can you make some ateez headcanons about how they would deal/respond with reader being shy about sex with them in general (perhaps because of insecurities, or just because reader is so intensely crushing on them it gets to a point)
Or about wanting to try something new in bed (can be anything really) but feeling very shy to ask?
note: hi anon! This has been sitting around forever (I always say this, I'm so sorry). I apologize for that but I am slowly losing my interest in writing :/ anyways, please enjoy this! (I did try my best to spelling/grammar check this so hopefully it flows well)
warning! discussions of sex, sexuality, discomfort with sex, etc... let me know if im missing something so I can add it to the warnings immediately :) if this is something that hits close to home, please skip this one and I will see you in the next one.
note: hi anon! This has been sitting around forever (I always say this, I'm so sorry). I apologize for that but I am slowly losing my interest in writing :/ anyways, please enjoy this!
hongjoong
I personally think he would be so good with this. hongjoong is the type of guy that would not initiate sex with his partner for the first time. He would wait for them to bring it up or ask about it. After a few months, he was starting to get worried that you weren't liking him anymore. You had not tried initiating any sexual contact within the time of your 7 months together. Of course, Hongjoong is an adult so he is going to solve things like Ana dust and ask you about it straight up. He listens as you let it all out and he respects your vulnerability in that moment. In the end, he tells you there is no pressure, he just wanted to be sure you still liked him. You hug him and tell him that you still like him and just need some time and some help from him. He is more than willing to help you unlearn any sexual discomfort you've picked up.
seonghwa
he picked up on the situation while shopping with you one day. you had asked him to go shopping with you for a music festival outfit you were putting together. He agreed and took you to the mall. Everything was going well until seonghwa made a joke about going into the closest Victoria Secret store for new underwear. you kind of shut down and didn't react to his joke. He'd realized that maybe he was a little insensitive for making a suggestive joke without thinking twice about how you'd feel. He pulls you aside where there weren't too many people that could listen. He apologizes profusely and makes it very clear that he wasn't trying to upset you. You;re still quiet and he's trying to find out what's wrong. He asks what upset you and that's when you let it all out. He was mortified at the fact that he could have made you feel even slightly uncomfortable. He gives you a tight squeeze and goes right back to apologizing endlessly. He promises to never hurt you again and to do whatever he can to make you feel better. He takes you back towards the stores and buys you a little plush as a peace offering. You love it and forgive him.
yunho
your discomfort becomes obvious the first time you two watch a movie together. yunho really wanted to watch a rom-com, the selection was suggested by san who said "girls love rom-coms!" you looked a little unsure but ultimately said yes to his selection. That tipped him off that something was weird because, san would never lie to him about something girl related. When a spicy scene comes up, you start to look away and mess with your finger nails. While he considered it could just be uncomfortable because the both of you are so new to the relationship, he also considered that maybe sex was just not something you found enjoyable or enticing. he paused the movie and turned to you to ask you what was up. you tell him that the scene made you uncomfortable and you explained why. yunho switched off the movie and turned on something else. That was the moment you knew he was a keeper. He never once teased you or made you feel less because of the discomfort you expressed. He was so good about it.
yeosang
oh, the puppy :( the conversation starts with yeosang. He noticed that during your last few dates, you would deny his advances. For example, if he put a warm hand on your thigh while watching a movie on the couch, you would start to move away from him. Of course, he would pull his hand back to avoid any further discomfort for you. After 2-3 instances of this happening, he invites you over to confront the situation head on. he doesn't make it full of tension because he doesn't want to scare you away. he asks what was up and expresses his feelings. he is so attentive and engages with your sentiment. he finally understands and that opens up the path to a conversation about helping you heal from any sexual discomfort or trauma. he is so good at working with you.
san
never beating the sweet boy allegations (Malcolm Todd reference hehe). he is always so gentle with his approach on potentially sensitive subjects. The subject of your shyness with the topic of sex comes up after about four months of dating. He doesn't initiate it, you do. you were getting worried because he cancelled your last date because of work. you were starting to think that maybe he was getting bored because you weren't showing signs of wanting to put out. you start the conversation with him shyly but he is so understanding. he makes it easy to talk about the topic and never makes you feel any sort of shame. he assures you that his cancelling was not because of anything but work. he also makes it clear that your relationship is based on love, not on sex. he will wait however long he has to in order for you to feel comfortable with sex.
mingi
I feel like he is a little unsure about the situation at first. Of course, he is the kind gentleman we all know and love but it takes a little explanation for him to understand your situation. he had never considered that sex could be uncomfortable for some people so when you start to tell him about your feelings, he is confused. he, in the kindest way possible, asks if you would feel comfortable explaining why you're uncomfortable. he also explains his point of view as a reason for his confusion. Of course, he is willing to sit there for hours and hash things out but in the end, it's made clear that he's going to wait for you and even work with you fi you let him. He'll do anything to show you that sex is a beautiful thing and can feel good for both sides.
wooyoung
When you tell him that sex is not something you're really open with, he is understanding but is curious about how he can help you. He expresses his understanding but opens up the conversation about why you might feel that way. Of course, if you want to talk about it another time, when you're more comfortable and ready, he doesn't fight it. If you do decide to start talking about the source of your discomfort, he is all ears. He's so engaged with your discussion and even makes mental notes of any triggers you bring up. He is very patient with you when it comes to the process of opening up in a sexual sense. If you allow him, he will ease you into it with very gentle, tender sexual encounters.
jongho
he is so understanding when his partner expresses they are shy about sex and other related topics. He gets it and gives you the option to talk it out with him or to just let it be the way it is until you're ready to sort things out. He is so good when it comes to avoiding sexual topics. He never makes sexual jokes if he knows they'll make you uncomfortable. He also warns his friends, and the other members, to not crack sex jokes around you because they make you uncomfortable. Of course, he's not out there spreading your detailed business or anything, he's just looking out for you.












