With the anniversary of Davy Jones’ death next week, sometimes I think I don’t have as much right to grieve for Davy as many others, for the simple reason that when Davy passed away, I didn’t regard myself as a fan of the Monkees. Yeah, I liked the songs that I knew - the songs that everybody knows - but I wasn’t a fan. What little I knew about them was from my mum briefly telling me about their show and showing me the back of her Monkees records.
Davy had a face that I knew and a name that I recognised. My biggest exposure to him (that I can recall) came just a day or two before he died. BBC2 aired a documentary called I’m In A Boyband!. It’s basically my favourite documentary ever and you should check it out because if you love boybands as much as I do then it’ll be right up your street!! But ANYWAY. This documentary featured chats with boybanders of past and present, from One Direction to Boyzone to Five to the Jackson Five etc. etc., and it also featured Davy Jones and Micky Dolenz. I remember thinking Davy was funny and sassy and I really liked him. I remember being confused - and also surprised - that he was British, because “I thought the Monkees were American??”. But I liked him a lot and thought he was a joker. I remember after that show aired, my sister said she wanted to get The Monkees show on DVD.
So Davy passed away just a couple of days after this. I remember reading it online and was like “no way!”. I remember telling my mum (or my sister might’ve actually?) and my mum was actually really upset. Even my dad was like “oh no, really?”. My mum was only 5 (almost 6) when The Monkees first aired here but I believe she watched re-runs when she was a little older. She had often spoken about how much she loved them (Peter had always been her favourite) when she was a child/young teen, so she was naturally crushed when she learnt that one of them had passed away.
I was sad to hear that Davy had died (especially when I heard about him leaving behind four daughters, one of which is only a year older than me), but I didn’t feel a personal sense of loss because at that point he didn’t play a significant role in my life. I had no idea that less than six months later I would be obsessed with the Monkees. I had no clue at all!
Davy’s death certainly piqued my interest in the band - but only a little. My sister did try to find the show on DVD, but it was always way too expensive on Amazon. I don’t know if the price went up after Davy died or what. But it was July or August when ITV aired a programme called We Love The Monkees that really started my journey into Monkeedom. This documenary was made part in memory of Davy, and I remember watching it with my family. I really liked it and was really intrigued by a band that was also a TV show. After this, my mum had a gander on ebay and found both seasons of The Monkees for a reasonable price. We sat down to watch the first few episodes together and the rest, as they say, WAS HISTORY.
While my mum brought these DVDs as a piece of nostalgia and to show me and my sister what she was into when she was a kidda, she had no idea that we would both fall in love just as hard - maybe even harder! - than she did like 40-odd years before. In the end it was me and my sister who sat up late watching episode after episode *every single night*. And the episodes we loved most we’d watch again before we moved onto the next one because we’re massive nerds, OBVS.
That’s my story of how I got into the Monkees. Everything else sort of followed on from there. But going back to Davy… Everything I learnt about the band, I learnt after Davy had gone. Watching all the documentaries, reading all the books, trawling through hundreds of pages of #the monkees tag picking up any piece of information I could find, listening to all the music I could get my hands on - I didn’t have to deal with the pain of knowing him and loving him and losing him. I have no idea if this is a good thing or not. On the one hand, it would’ve been nice to have been a hardcore fan while all the guys were still with us. It would’ve been nice to dream that some day I’d get to see them all live together (as unlikely as they may have been!). But on the otherhand, I’m glad I didn’t have to hear that he’d gone being the fan that I am today. I’m one of these people that do feel the deaths of ‘celebrities’ quite deeply. Some people find that stupid, but fuck you. I have a heart, SOZ.
So that brings me back to the start of this post; do I have a right to grieve for Davy when I hardly “knew” him when he was alive? I can’t go back and relive my despair and heartache of learning of his loss. I remember it, but it wasn’t that kick in the stomach that it would’ve been had it happened now. I learnt about and grew to love Davy when he was already gone. Does that mean I don’t have as much right to be sad as the people who were fans before he died that he isn’t here anymore?
I’ll always be able to relate to Davy on a different level than I can relate to the other Monkees because A) BRITISH, and B) bitchy (lmao). I always somehow managed to find his bitchiness and bitterness about the other guys more funny than upsetting, but that’s not to say I didn’t find some of the comments he made about the guys to be totally uncalled for and unecessary. Sometimes he crossed the line. There was a definite bitterness within Davy, a cattiness, and sometimes I wonder why that was. I try not to think about it too much because it makes me sad. But you could tell that underneath that was a really nice, good-hearted bloke. And lets be honest, everyone can be - and is - a bitch, it’s just Davy sometimes didn’t filter it. In a way you have to admire his honesty..!
I wish there could’ve been one last hurrah. I wish there could’ve been a final tour with all four of them getting along and having fun. Even if I wasn’t there to see it, or a fan at the time to see it, to know that it had happened would’ve been more than enough for me. Micky spoke about how they were planning to tour - all of them - before Davy died. I’d like to believe this was true, but I’m honestly not so sure. I hope it’s true. The fact that Mike came back so soon after Davy passed suggests maybe it really *was* true. To think that they were at least all talking, communicating, making plans…that’s a really nice thought. It’s heartbreaking that those potential plans didn’t come to light, but to know that they were there in the first place is really comforting. I’ve always been someone who just wants people to get along. When bands I’ve loved have broken up in the past, to me it’s been more of “I hope they’re still best friends/haven’t fallen out.” as opposed to “OH NO I won’t get to see them live again!”. I really hope that when Davy passed away, some of that bitterness from before (especially his bitterness towards Mike) had lifted.
I know things have been said about Davy’s young wife, but I really don’t know a great deal about that - and to be honest, from the little bits and pieces I have heard - I don’t think I want to. What I do know is that he had four daughters who adored him, and he adored them too, and that’s something that can never, ever go away.
Davy was short. Davy didn’t have the best singing voice in the world. Davy didn’t really play any instruments in the Monkees (not consistantly, anyway). Davy was bitchy. But Davy had so much more than all of those things. He had charm. He had charisma. He had the cutest face the world of pop has ever seen. He was the orginal boyband heart-throb. He had a heart of gold. He was generous and kind. He was a great actor. He was funny as hell, both as the character of Davy and the real Davy. He had grade-A dance moves that I’m jealous of. He was a performer. An entertainer. He was the voice of Daydream Believer, one of the most joyful and feel-good pop jams of all time. He was a wonderful father. He loved his horses. You can tell that he was a top bloke. And you can also tell that, despite everything, he loved the Monkees. The Monkees as a whole, and the Monkees as individuals - Micky, Peter and Mike.
I still have no idea if I have much right to grieve for Davy Jones. But what I do know is that I wish he was still here.
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